I'm currently obsessed with boobs....
I'm currently obsessed with boobs. My partner said recently I've spent more time looking at breasts than a teenage boy. He is correct :-)
I've wanted implants since as long as I can remember and I can't wait till I can fill out a bra, let alone a t-shirt.
My current stats =
unfilled B cup (shape doesn't fit an A cup, but too small to fill a B cup- fun times)
Symmetrical breast measurements (according to a PS)
Healthy and 'relatively' fit- I enjoy fitness activities, but I'm not a junky.
My Wishlist =
My current shape, just BIGGER
Sexy side and under boob look
Natural shape/ appearance
Not that 'bolted on' look
And of course... complication free :-)
This is my journey... I'm looking forward to everyone's comments, suggestions, tips and love. I've found Real Self so helpful and compassionate, so I hope my story helps as much as others had helped me so far! Xx
The great surgeon hunt.
Trying to find and pick a surgeon feels like trying to decipher a code to a complicated science equation, where you know the answer you want, you just don't know which is the right way of getting to it.
So far I've met with 2 PS and a PS nurse in Adelaide.
Dr Julie Lawrence at Brighton Day Surgery =
First impression was that Julie was impersonal, brief with information, and disinterested. Consult was $168 with Medicare refund if GP referred. There was no talk of post care and mentioned first check up at day 10? Retiring at end of 2016- so what about complications etc? But she was keen to book the surgery- I didn't feel comfortable with the service.
Surgery = $12700
Dr Richard Hamilton at Hamilton House =
I met with the nurse for a free consultation. She was lovely- very personal, extremely thorough, and helpful. She took health history and asked questions of my wishes. We did measurements and a 3D scan. Although, the nurse would only show me up to 290cc in the digital images (I don't have a copy), more size options and trying on is done with the surgeon. To see the surgeon it's $154. I've booked an appointment.
Surgery = approx $11k - $12k
Dr Michael Higgs at Parkside =
I was very impressed with Dr Higgs free consultation. He was friendly, knowledgeable, helpful and followed a structure which I liked as I felt I got all the information. We did measurements, pictures and a breast cancer examination (all in the presence of a female nurse). I was walked through procedure in detail. Questions about my wishes and lots of pictures shown for comparison to my actual breast shape. I was given 3D images for 335cc. Sizing choice is made in free pre-op appointment. I've made an appointment. Then if surgery is booked, it's a $700 nonreturnable deposit.
At this stage I'm leaning towards Dr Higgs. My only concern is that he is a 'cosmetic' surgeon and not a 'plastic' (FRACS) surgeon. Dr Higgs explained his qualifications and experience to me in detail, which seemed reassuring. It's just I've always been told it needs to be a plastic surgeon to be qualified.
Does anyone have any suggestions on this???
Also, has anybody got any feedback on these surgeons? Or recommendations for any other Adelaide surgeons to consider?
It's so hard to know what and who is right!
Thanks heaps x
Size does matter!
There are SO many choices! I'm feeling a bit confused about sizing decisions as I have read a lot about boob envy and disappointment once swelling goes down. Although, I want to balance size with the overall look to be 'natural'. Understanding 'natural' is subjective!
Also, I find that looking at pictures has helped, but also hindered as I think one looks bigger than another, although, they're a smaller CC etc.
Does anyone have any feedback on this? How did you make your final decision? Where you happy?
My sizing status =
I've been told 375cc is the max I can fit by one PS.
I've tried 375cc, 345cc and 310cc with one PS. 375cc and 345cc felt too big.
310cc felt good and PS said it looked natural, but then I'm worried I'd think it's too small post.
I've seen 290cc in 3D. I felt it was way too small.
I've seen 335cc in 3D. I felt this was a better fit.
*** see the digital images
So far I'm thinking along the lines of round, under the muscle, 335cc.
Although, I'm curious if I should go up?!
I feel like 375cc look HUGE against my frame- they look really low on my waist! Although, it might be that the bra just makes them look saggy though?
I haven't tried 335cc sizers yet. Keen to try these!
If I had a magic wand, these are a few pics of what I'm get...
Surgery date and post surgery travel/holiday!
I have a holiday to Bali planned from Boxing Day till after NY, and I had discussed this with doctors in regards to safe time to travel post surgery. Some said 6 weeks, some said 4 weeks.
Has anyone travelled post surgery? Did you have any issues? How long did you leave it. Obviously it should be fine considering people travel overseas to have their surgery done and then travel home around a week post. I just wasn't sure with regards to feeling comfortable and confident on a beach holiday!
This also means that I might be having the 'twins' earlier than expected (was Dec), because a surgeon I'm considering said they S had a reschedule and they can now fit me in on 18 November!!! So I'm quite excited, but also a little nervous now!
That's less than 4 weeks away!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It would would out perfectly for me though- I've finished exams for the year and it'd give me 5 weeks before my holiday!
Feels like it's falling into place!
Pre-op sizing appointment done!
Shiz is getting real! :-0
I just had my pre-op appointment with Dr Higgs. I've decided I'm going with him and I feel really confident with this as my decision for my PS. He is really personable, informative and calming. I also like the nurses and the facilities, as well as the level of process and care they have in place at Parkside. And thanks to the lovely ladies on RS who have given feedback as well! So I paid the deposit and it's all locked in. OMG.
We discussed sizing at this appointment. I showed Dr Higgs my wish boob photos (posted on here) and he said for my size/frame 335cc will achieve this look. He said bigger would ruin the look I am after. We tried 290cc and 335cc in the bra. 290cc seemed very 'natural', but I've decided I actually want to be a bit bigger than this. I tried 335cc and it felt/ looked good on my frame. Dr Higgs measured the implant against my breast and said it was the perfect size. He thinks it'll achieve a D cup, the nurse things C/D cup.
Out of interest I tried the next size up, which is 370cc. This did look HUGE on me! I felt like it looked too big. My partner did too- he thinks 335cc was good. Although, I'll be honest, I'm still worried about having boob envy and feeling like I should've gone bigger. I've got that 'maybe I should go 370cc' feeling. But do I want to sacrifice the look and shape for size- not really! So I think I need to relax and trust the PS- he is the expert after all!!!
Does anyone have any comment/ feedback/ thoughts about this???
So in summary, I've locked in...
Narrelle (I think)
Gummy bear gel
Under muscle- dual plane
Under breast incision
The pics are showing this implant. What do you think??? We looked at pics of before and after of girls from these sizing pics to post-op and they looked pretty similar. So this is pretty close to what the post-op result would be apparently.
Bring on the boobies!
Change of date... again.
Life happens, and so I have another surgery date change! Annnnnnd we're not going to Bali for NYE anymore. But it's all ok.
So new surgery date is now 9 December.
Which works out well because it means I will have 3 weeks off from work with sick leave and the holiday shutdown.
I'm still not feeling 100% on my size choice either, so this does give me more time to see how I feel.
31 days to go and counting :-)
Boob 'lump', size change and MASSIVE nerves!
I've been having massive anxiety about my size decision! I just didn't feel 'satisfied' and kept thinking about boob-greed, people saying they'd wished they'd gone bigger (when my friends who've had them), and pics I liked that I felt weren't matching my choice.
Had chosen 335cc, and considering 370cc- which is now locked in.
(Round, full profile, smooth, gummy bears)
So I had another appointment with my surgeon to discuss going up to 370cc. I must say, it made me feel really uneasy! The nurse wasn't overly friendly this time. I even asked her if many girls did this (changed their mind) and she said "nope". I felt like I was just wasting their time. It was all quite disappointing actually and made me feel really anxious. I took my sister and she said the 335cc looked very proportional, but I've been thinking I wanted a tiny bit bigger than proportional- with that side boob look, but nothing outrageous, just a little bit bigger boob. I didn't think 370cc was too 'massive' of a jump- it's only 35g and .5 cm difference! Just enough. My measurements can fit them too! The PS said 370cc is bigger than I expect and not to tell him they're too big- almost like an 'I told you so' post surgery. So I felt quite ashamed for asking. But in the end, the PS said if I'd been considering the bigger size and I didn't go the bigger, I'd always think about it and I'd always wonder... but he wasn't exactly on my side. So now I'm freaking out. He said not to worry, he'll do a good job and I'm in good hands- which I have no doubt about. I just walked out just as anxious as I went in. But I can't change it now- it's less than a week to go. So it's done.
I've also been massaging in bio oil and I noticed a hardened 'lump/mass/area' and it's quite painful- I can feel discomfort in the area. So went to my GP who is sending me for an ultrasound as a precaution. She thinks it's absolutely nothing to worry about and just a hardening of the tissue. The PS thinks it's just my natural formation (match on other side) and I've just irritated it. Neither think it will interfere with the surgery. I'm worried that if this is what happened with just a bit of massaging, what the eff is cutting them open and stuffing them full of implant going to do- I'm hoping they're not that easily irritated!!! It's just been a stressful week thinking about the 'what ifs'.
Basically, I'm starting to get really nervous! I've never had surgery, or a general anaesthetic, so I'm really anxious about that side. I'm nervous about my size decision. My friend had a good chat to me about my perception of 'too massive' and the reality of what I've chosen not being rediculous, and kinda calmed the nerves about me thinking I'm now going to look like a freak. He gave some good fashion advice as well. I just can't help feel a bit overwhelmed by it all. I don't know if that's because I've wanted this for as long as I remember and it's almost here, or if it's just because I can be an exceptionally indecisive person so I'm just doubting.
I need to be more positive. And I am really excited. I just needed to get this all out I guess... thanks for reading! I know it's going to turn out amazingly and I'll be happy because it's more than what I'm starting with! I'll get used to having big boobs and I'll love it- I have no doubt about that. I think I just want to be in the next phase already and this lead-up week will be a biggy for anticipation- time to say my farewells to my baby bee stings! ????
Dear gawd... they're huge.
Ok I'm officially now freaking out they're too big.
My PS made a following up call to me today, which I thought was nice! He told me he'd loaded the 370cc into my 3D account for me to view. He said he'd left the the 335cc on the 3ad account too- but quickly followed up with he didn't think we should change again. I'm pretty much locked in for the 370cc now.
But I think I'm just generally having a freak out.
Has anyone else had this experience???
Boob 'lump' - all clear and I'm going to have my period at surgery time- eeek!!!
Had the ultrasound this morning and the Doctor said the lump is just normal tissue being a hormonal pain in the breast (not the technical terms. Haha).
'Breast fibrosis' is a common breast change associated with menstruation! Apparently it's just a hormonal response in the tissue that creates the milk. It's particularly associated with changes in oestrogen.
This is basically what my PS said on Friday as well! So that's great!
In the end... all good news!!!
I am at the start of my period cycle today, so it all fits in with the diagnosis. Unfortunately this means I'll be in my 'I'm pretty sure I'm haemorrhaging' stage of my period on Friday for my surgery. Not excited about having to sort out the 'needs' of this while I'm straight out of surgery.
Sorry to be crass- but has anyone else had their period during surgery??? I'm not sure how the 'logistics' of this is going to work!!!!
One more sleep... so nervous!!!
It feels quite surreal! I've wanted this for longer than I can remember and it's happening tomorrow!
Last time I'll be bio oiling my bitty baby boobies! OMG! Feel like I need to say goodbye to them!
Here are some body shots for proportion (the shine in bio oil. lol).
If I'm honest, I'm still freaking out HARD that I've chosen to big (370cc)!!! Not much I can do now, but it's got me anxious as all hell.
All set for some R&R. Now just need to get some sleep tonight- hopefully :-)
See everyone on the flip side! Xx
Day of surgery diary... I have boobs :-)
9 Dec 2016
Day of treatment
Well, that was easy. lol.
But in all seriousness, I'm so surprised how quick and easy it was. Arrived at 7:30 am, straight in for questions and obs with the nurse. Then a chat with the anaesthetist (AN) and the PS. Then off to have pics and the PS did his markups (maps he called it). Then into the theatre. Everyone was SO lovely, they explained everything they were doing and I felt I was in great hands!!! The nurse was really nice- kept me chatting and was funny- really eased my nerves! The service was amazing!
As it was my first ever surgery, it is an understatement to say that I was packin' ma pants with nerves!!! I asked how long it'd take to fall asleep, and the AN said 'you won't even notice'... he was right. As soon as he'd put the 'take the edge off' drug in, I remember feeling like I was as happy as a wineo at a lounge bar, and then next thing I know, I was in a wheelchair asking the nurse if I said anything stupid! Haha. Apparently I didn't... except for that. Ha.
I was told I was textbook case, I woke up straight away, no issues with the procedure, no sickness from drugs- kept water down straight away. In theatre at 8:15am and left for home at 11:45am. Was meant to be released at 1:30pm, but I was so fine I could leave early! So I'm home. Just need to take it easy. Cannot believe it! No 'pain' just a LOT of pressure and a light 'throbbing' like feeling- as if a cubby kid is sitting on my chest. Haha. But I think the anaesthetic has just worn off cause my skin was twitching like mad (over whole body) and I can only 'lucid' nap with weird thoughts!. lol. I haven't been able to sleep properly during the day- so I'm tired. Hopefully this will help me sleep tonight.
I'm having 2 x paracetamol with codeine every 4 hours and I'm fine on this (haven't needed the endone). Just having trouble getting up and down without using my arms to push. Clearly I don't do enough squats. lol. Otherwise, I'm just totally milking the slave/nurse factor with my partner as much as possible... according to him I need someone to put my socks on and feed me. Hahaha.
Oh and having your period is totally fine with surgery. Turn away now if you don't like TMI- had a tampon in with undies on and no dramas. It's been difficult to change tampons today- I think I've taken the angles and pressure this requires for granted before. Haha. But so far, all ok. My period bloat is the worst though (see pics)! Ha. No cramps though... thank you good drugs. Lol.
But... It's all done. Shit IS real. lol. And I'm feeling great. Looking forward to them not looking like my boobs have been stung by bees and seeing how the results turn out!
So I have... 370cc, full profile, round, smooth, beast fold incision.
One thing I will say- they look bigger in real life. It's really hard to get a pic that looks realistic. But they don't look as big as I had imagined based on the sizers at the PS or the rice sizers. Considering they're swollen now, I'll be surprised if they end up as big as I thought the sizers were. So I'm definitely feeling happy that I increased my size (was 335cc, went to 370cc)!!! So at this stage, the verdict is go bigger if you're in doubt. I hope they go a bit closer together, but my natural shape was kinda wide, so they might not. Time will tell.
Sorry for the superhero 'period' undies and my blue socks! The blue socks are actually a joke between my partner and I... if anyone knows of the sea birds named the 'blue footed boobies', you'll get it. Hehe.
Much love and thanks for reading this thesis. Haha xx
First 10 days done and feeling better!
Week one with the Divas has been a roller coaster!!!
After the high of the surgery and my surprise at its ease, the following days were filled with uncomfortable times and emotional irritation! The first 3-4 days I was really emotional and extremely irritated by everything (related to my boobs and everything in general- thank god I have a supportive partner). I would have sharp pangs of strong pain and I was just uncomfortable from not being able to move properly. I was sleeping long hours, but I'd wake with pain in my boobs, back and bum (for sitting).
The main pain was from the incisions sites. The dressing felt itchy (the nurse mentioned this might happen, but not to remove it otherwise could cause infection) and every time I moved and any weight went on the incisions, it felt like I was being stabbed. This didn't stop till about day 7-8.
I had my check up on day 7. The PS was happy with the progress and removed the stitch. He said I can wear different bras, as long as they're soft, don't rub the incisions and no underwire. He also suggested I use bio oil on the skin around my boobs because I was quite swollen. Once the steristrips fall off on their own, I can also use scar cream. My next check up is at 4 weeks.
I haven't taken many pics because I've kinda been overwhelmed by how they look. They're only just starting to look boobs at day 10. Prior to this they've looked misshapen, high, and really far apart. I knew to expect this, so I just haven't wanted to fuss and take pics, or I knew I'd just worry about them!
Today I went for a walk and did some minor housework- no heavy lifting or pushing etc. purely light stuff. And I've noticed swelling in my left boob. I had to ice it. I'm really worried about capsular contracture because I had that lump in the tissue- I can feel it and see it. So need to take it easy... hard to do when I haven't done any Christmas shopping. Haha.
Funny thing I've noticed is I've felt really obnoxious putting tight tops on and putting them our there! How ironic. I need to get used to them, but they're in proportion with my body I think. I've put on a big of weight and don't feel myself from being so inactive either!!!
Am I happy...? I'm becoming more happy each day. I have been a bit worried and not loving them up until now if I'm honest. The gap has worried me, but it's gotten a bit better as the swelling goes down. I still feel like they will turn out ok... I hope they do!!! I'm excited for them to soften so I can get some cleavage. All in good time I guess.
I love the size- sooooo glad I went up to the 370cc.
When did people start to massage them??? I forgot to ask the PS.
To love or not to love...
Tomorrow will be 4 weeks PO... time flies hey! I haven't been posting much as I've been trying to avoid the 'comparison effect' and I have found my pics have made me worried, as I explain below.
It's continued to be a bit of a rollercoaster between loving and not so much loving the Divas. I haven't quite found my groove with how to dress them yet, and it's stumped me a bit. I find they disappear under clothes (unless I wear tight, which I rarely do), but I love the size naked. I got fitted for a 10 DD bra (no underwire), but they do not seem like a 10 DD (or my perception of that at least).
They're still really round and high, and it's put me off getting them out a little, and worries me that they just look really fake. I know I need to be patient and give them time to drop and soften, but I keep looking at other girls transformation by the 4 week mark and I'm beginning to worry that this is what they're going to look like. One boob is either dropping faster, or there is a bit of a misshape going on- could be the hard tissue I refer to in a previous post.
My natural breast shape is quite wide, so I've got epic side boob, which is awesome! The cleavage has gotten better, but this is when pushed up a bit... otherwise it's rather sparse!
My girlfriend owns an online swimmer boutique (www.mazarineaqua.com) and she sent me a few bathers to try on. See pics. I loooooove the bathers, but I'm still really nervous about getting the Divas out!!! Which is really annoying considering I've wanted them forever and thought I'd be instantly rocking them out and proud.
It's funny though, in pics they look so much rounder than what I see when I look in the mirror... so I get put off when I take pics! Why is this- has anyone else found this happens???
On another note... the other half totally loves them. Haha.
Pics are day 27- so almost 4 weeks. Please excuse the PMS bloat!!!