3 weeks post op today! It has gone by so fast, and...
3 weeks post op today! It has gone by so fast, and yet so slow... Today is a good day :0) my swelling is going down slowly, but I still feel "fat". I accomplished a couple loads of laundry (washing, drying, folding, and putting away)! Dishes are done, and counters are spotless. Now I'm taking a little break before I go on an outing this afternoon.
This whole process has been way more emotional than I planned, SO BE PREPARED!
Healing is a lot of work especially when you're used to being independent and taking care of the house, kids, husband and work!
I'm having a few issues. #1- my scar looks terrible! I have ugly ripples and wrinkles and swelling! Ughhhh... The swelling :0( my PS says that it will smooth out as the swelling goes down, but I'm not sure I believe him. All of the TT pictures I have looked at, and stories I have read, none of which have I seen or heard of this problem. Everyone brags how smooth their scar feels! Maybe in the end I will have a good outcome...
#2- one breast is significantly higher than the other!!! Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!! It's like the fears I had before surgery are reigning true! My right breast seems to be settling nicely into its pocket (looking great actually), but my left one is still "riding high". I sure hope they even out. I have been doing all that I'm told by my PS, so I don't think it's because of anything I've done wrong. This really worries me because my mom had the same thing happen with her first BA!!! It never did drop, and then she ended up with a defective implant on the other side and had them redone a couple years later. I don't wanna do surgery again!
#3- I have a fairly large gap between my boobs. I know that "bras create cleavage" but, I feel like with the size implant I got (500cc high profile silicone) they should be closer than they are! I don't know, maybe I'm being over critical and too much of a perfectionist, but I wanna feel good about my results. I know it's way better than I was, but I'm still struggling.
Has anyone else had these issues? I need friends to help me thru this. Thanks and good luck to all you mommy makeovers!
3 weeks 2 days...
I can't believe the difference...
3 weeks 2 days...
I can't believe the difference a day or two can make! My left breast is dropping!!! YAYYYYYYY :0D they both have really softened up too! I'm excited for my 4 week mark...
Ill post a new pic later today.
Tmrw will be four weeks pst op. I'm feeling more...
Tmrw will be four weeks pst op. I'm feeling more and more discouraged and unhappy about my results :0( I just wanted to be perfect... And I feel like I look the same. I asked my PO to send my pre op pics so I could really put it all into perspective, but I still haven't received them. I'm on the verge of tears every time I look down :'0(
I just need to be healed completely, see my full results, and get some good compliments or something...
I'm obsessed with looking thru everyone's pics and comparing their results with mine! I love my PO, but idk if I chose the right one, or maybe I didn't make it clear to him the results I was longing for, or maybe my body is never supposed to be what I can feel confident about. I hope I can find some happiness within myself...
I've added a couple before pics.
Well, I finally did it! Sporting both my spanx and...
Well, I finally did it! Sporting both my spanx and CG I strapped the new girls down and hit the treadmill!!! Yayyyy! 2 miles walking brisk and 1 mile running! I'm so happy :0D
Today will also mark my first really busy day back at work. (8 hrs) and I'm a little nervous about how i will feel by the end of the day, but business as usual :0)
Happy healing girls!
5 wks PO!
Yesterday I had my first trip, post...
5 wks PO!
Yesterday I had my first trip, post new body, to Vicky's (Victoria Secret). Holy crapola!!! I'm a 32DDD!!! Woah! My left boob still doesn't wanna even out with my right, but I can tell they are both settling nicely. I'm really loving them now :0D
I'm feeling pretty confident lately :0) still have the dreadfully uncomfortable swelling everyday. It starts around 3:00 and doesn't let up until I lay down for bed. I'm doing all my normal activities, trying not to lift much, but other than that I'm back to normal. It's frustrating that I get so exhausted from simple activities, but each day is getting better. I just signed up for my next 10k! It's on June 8th so I don't have much time for training, but I'm confident in my ability. Started slow last week, and working my way up :0)
Happy healing everyone!
So, I sent some new pics to my favorite surgical...
So, I sent some new pics to my favorite surgical nurse (she has been so great). I send her questions and concerns along with weekly pics and updates, and she relays it all to Dr Mok. My concern is regarding what I believe to be a seroma :0/ I have had a suspicion of this since my drain was removed at 1 wk PO. I kept hoping it was just normal swelling, and would go away, but it has not. So now I must have it drained... I'm a bit freaked out! I hate needles!!! And I live 9hrs away from my PS so he is working on getting me in with a PS he knows only 1 1/2 away! I wish I lived closer to my PS but, I can't change that now... My hopes are to have this drained, BE FLAT FINALLY, and not to need repeat drainings done. I added new pics of my seroma...
Happy healing girls
So... My appt went well. I DO NOT have a seroma...
So... My appt went well. I DO NOT have a seroma :0) just gushy swelling :0( the dr did an ultrasound that showed some fluid mixed with "jelly stuff" he called it. God I hope it's not fat! Anyway, he offered to stick me anyway and try to draw fluid out, but I turned down the offer. So, I have to continue wearing my CG and just deal with it I guess :0( my ps called this evening and left me a voicemail to call him back, however it was too late to call when I retrieved the msg. I'll call tmrw.
I talked to Dr Mok today :0)I updated him on what...
I talked to Dr Mok today :0)I updated him on what the Dr said about the swelling and that I don't have a seroma. He seemed a little confused, but he told me I will be fine and I need to massage the area as often as I can to try and get the fluid to be absorbed. I'm gunna see if I can get my sister-in-law (a massage therapist) to give me a lymphatic massage. Dr Mok said that would be very helpful. Why couldn't this just go as planned? I want this swelling to just GO AWAY!!!
Forgot to add my 7wk pics
***new 7 wk pics***
8 wks PO and still concerned with this blob
Is it swelling? Or is it fat and extra skin!?!?!?!? I'm tired of this
I won't be going to see my ps for at least another month and I don't know if I'm comfortable with that :0( the massage and castor oil packs I'm doing are only helping maybe a tiny little bit! I don't have patience for this! My 10k is coming up quick, and I'm in no way prepared for it. Ughhh... I've gained a couple lbs and I can't seem to control my eating! I've been so addicted to health and fitness for 2yrs now, I don't understand why I lost my motivation :0( I want to try some light ab work this week, but idk if its a good idea with all this swelling?!? I will be calling my surgical nurse tmrw, hopefully she can set my mind at ease and answer my questions.
Ran a practice 10k today!
This morning marks my furthest run since surgery! A full 10k!!! Yayyyyy :0D I feel pretty much back to normal lately. My activity level is back at normal. Today after my run, I push mowed my 1/2 acre lawn. Then I put on my tiny bikini and tried to get a little sun, did some laundry, cleaned up the house, went on a 3mile walk with my family and then finished the day off with a nice meal at my parents house.
I'm feeling accomplished :0) tomorrow I will be talking to my ps about getting this bulge of fluid drained, it's still the same... Ughhh! Other than the persistent swelling I have no complaints. Happy healing girlies :0)
These pics were taken just under the 9wk PO mark. Gosh it's hard to believe its been 9wks already!!!
Trying to ignore my concerns...
I'm really trying to ignore the issues I have with my mm. I'm still not happy with my huge gap. I have no cleavage, at all. Even when I squeeze them together! It's making me feel so regretful I ever did this surgery. All I wanted was to feel comfortable in my own skin!!! Before my mm I would wear t-shirts to bed, because I couldn't stand for my husband to see me naked, although a day never passes, since we met, that he doesn't tell me I'm beautiful. I need to feel it!!! Since my mm I've been wearing not only a t-shirt to bed, but now I'm also wearing a sports bra! My hubby asked me the other day how my left boob was settling cuz he hasn't seen them! I'm waiting til I reach the 3mth mark to really freak out, so until then I try to ignore the fact I'm unhappy. I put on a smile, and tell everyone I love how big they are :0)
I'm also very unsatisfied with my TT. This bulge I have above my incision on the right side, has made me even more self conscious of my tummy. Last night, while having sex, my hubby caught me covering my tummy with my hand :0( this is what I always did before my surgery! Will I ever be confident??? I'm am incapable?!?! I've been doing everything I can to change the way I feel about my body. Losing 75lbs, working out hard and toning and building muscle, and now surgery! Will I feel better about myself in time? Or will I just continue to be self conscious and critical? :0( just 2 more weeks and i reach 12wks PO. I don't foresee any major changes in this body I have altered and sculpted. I don't wanna face the fact I will most certainly be getting revisions done on both my breasts and tummy. Why did I ever do this!!! I was unhappy before and I'm unhappy now...
11 wks po and running a 10k tmrw!!!
So, I'm just a few days shy of my 11wk PO mark. I've been light training for this 10k since 4wks PO and I really think I'm ready :0) I'm nervous and excited!
What a difference a few days make... I'm feeling much better about my results again. YAYYYYYYY!!! Everyone here giving such wonderful compliments sure does help :0) thank you! I pretty much quit wearing my CG and I see a big difference in my swelling. By the end of the day I'm swollen, of course, but not any more than I was wearing it so.... Plus the bulge is flattening out! Maybe the CG was preventing the fluid from spreading out and absorbing? Idk either way, I'm happy :0D
Thank you all again for the kind words and happy healing
It was awesome! I felt great the entire run! I didn't walk for even a min... Ran the entire thing!!! Woop woop!!!
12 wks is NOT a magic number...
Well, I made it to 12wks and I'm still having the same issues :0( I was truly hoping some of this would have resolved itself by now, but it has NOT! I have definitely found myself trading old insecurities for new ones :'0( 95% of my stretchmarks are gone and my boobs are bigger, but I feel deformed... I still have just as much swelling as I did at 4wks PO. My scar is fading nicely, but I hate that it's uneven and rises up in the middle which makes it almost impossible to cover, even in jeans. I had really high hopes for this makeover and so far I'm just disappointed. I'm hoping my ps will fix all the issues I have, but I still have 6wks before I see him, and idk if my concerns are fixable or I'm just stuck with this uneven scar, flap or bulge above my scar, small and really scarred navel, and implants that are still too high and far apart! 12wks is NOT a magic number :0(
Emergency trip to SC
Last week was crazy! My FIL ended up in the hospital needing emergency neck surgery to remove infected bone! He's on dialysis, and developed a blood infection that traveled to his bones in his neck, crazy!!! We had to fly out to South Carolina to be there with him...
This trip was eye opening for me. Once my FIL made it thru surgery and was doing well, he insisted we check out the sites of myrtle beach. Well, I didn't pack a bikini, so shopping was inevitable if I wanted to enjoy the beach. I had tried on all my old bikinis after surgery and none of them fit over my big ol' boobies, so I knew I would be shopping for a new one. I really thought it would be fun now! However, it was NOT :0( nothing fit me on top! Not only cuz these things are huge! But also because I couldn't find a single bikini top that gave me any cleavage. I felt awful :0( I settled on something plain that covered me, kinda like I did before surgery... I expected to walk into any store, after surgery, and put on any bikini and look amazing! I felt self conscious and insecure the whole time.
I sent my nurse crystal a MSG last Monday, and she said she would talk to dr Mok and let me know what he says. Still waiting... Ughhhhhh!
I really hate that all my updates are so negative and I worry that I'll never be happy. Maybe I do have body dis morphia!
No revisions till September :0(
I talked to the nurse today and she said dr Mok will not do any revisions till September! I'm so sad :0( I was hoping to have them done the beginning of August. He does however acknowledge my complaints and will fix them, so that's good. Back to the waiting game now...
14 weeks and still hoping for changes for the better.
This is so maddening!!! It seems the more time that passes, the more unsatisfied I become with my results. :0( September can't come soon enough!!!
4 months PO
Today marks 4 months for me. My life is completely back to normal. My workouts are great! I was a little scared to do abs and chest, but it's really not that bad :0) swelling is still present in the evening. It's not nearly as bad, but still annoying. I try to avoid a lot of sodium and I eat lots of fresh fruits and veggies. I've slowly found myself slacking on my water intake, but I'm still not drinking pop everyday! That's huge for me :0) I'm still running, not quite as much as I did last summer, but I did a 5k last weekend and took 1st for my age group and 7th overall for the ladies! Yayy me ;0) this weekend is the "BIG" Packer 5k!!! I'm a crazy Green Bay Packer fan and this is such an awesome event. It's the kickoff for training camp and I actually get to run through Lambeau Field :0D it's so cool!
I'm still not happy with my results, but my ps is making me wait til September (6mths PO). It can't come soon enough!
Wow! 5months already!
Hi girls! It's been about a month since I updated... So, not much has changed. I'm still having some swelling if I work my abs too hard, and I still hate my boob gap, and my TT scar and bulge have not improved at all. I'm not real sure why I have to wait so long for revisions. I'm working on getting my appt set up for the middle to end of September. It sounds like dr Mok will do whatever it takes to make me happy :0) but who knows how much it will cost :0(
On a better note, my fitness is at its peak! I just completed a 21 day challenge that involved clean eating and the insanity workouts! I'm totally impressed with my results! This is the first time I've taken before and after photos, and it's so cool to notice a change that way because, although I gained 3lbs of lean muscle and only lost about a 1/2 inch in each thigh, I can really see how my body has toned up :0) I have attached my pics. I am starting a new 21 day challenge in September and look forward to seeing what changes are yet to come!
Hope everyone is healing well!
So today was the day of my scar revision and breast revision. I'm doing great pain wise. I just hope my results will be what I've been longing for! For now I'm back at the waiting and healing game. I have two drains, one in my left breast and one in my tummy. I hope to have them taken out on Saturday... I will see someone at the clinic then, and head home. It's a nine hour drive back home and I'm really not looking forward to it. But I wanna be home, u know? I'm really surprised how little pain I'm in :0) I'll update tmrw and post pics soon.
Today is day four since my revision and I finally took a pic of the boobies! I don't have one for my tummy yet, I forgot to take pics yesterday after my shower, and we all know how hard it is getting in and out of our garments :0/ I promise to take more pics with my next shower. I'm still feeling pretty good. My tummy doesn't hurt at all, just a little tenderness at the drain site. My boobies are pretty sore on the bottom fold, probably from the incisions. And my cleavage area is stingy feeling cuz I'm pushing them together as tight as I can get them ;0) I have a Hanes front zip sports bra on that's at least one size too small, with a strap on top and a strap underneath. I'm trying to mold them into place. I'll post a pic... I'm sleeping in my bed at night but I think it would be more comfortable in my recliner. I'm still taking half a Vicodin every 4-6 hrs and some Tylenol along with my antibiotic. Overall, I'm so glad I had this revision. I can't wait to see how it all turns out! I feel so much more confident about my results already :0) YAYYYYYYY!
Feel free to ask me questions! Happy healing!
I'm feeling really great! Emotionally and physically.
Gosh I feel so good! :0D still having a little trouble getting comfortable in bed at night, but I sleep ok. Very minimal swelling and just some slight stinging in my boobs. My lefty is pretty swollen and there's a weird crease, but I hope it's just the swelling that's causing it. I'm so impressed with my cleavage! I really thought I would never have any... If anyone is considering having revisions done, DO IT! We all deserve the results we expected and if it takes a few revisions to get there, then so be it! Happy healing girlies :0)
2wks post revision
Well it's been two weeks now since I had my revisions done. I'm feeling great! I've been back to work full time since Monday and that's going better than I expected. I still can't believe how easy this recovery has been this go round! Monday I will be starting another 21 day challenge, so I'm pretty stoked about getting my workouts back on track.
I removed my tapes yesterday! Yikes! I was so scared to see the scars, but I was sooooo happy to see how great they look! I'm so happy :0D
Just keep healing.
Things r still going well. I'm back to full workouts already and feeling great! My boobs feel a little sore today after doing push-ups yesterday. I think I'm still happy with my results? I mean, I'm starting to pick myself apart again, but I'm trying not to, and I'm still way happier with how I look now after revisions! I'm just gunna keep healing :0)
I'm questioning my results again :0( I mean, I'm happier now than I was before this revision, but looking at side by side pics? I just don't know...
Please give me honest thoughts!
Hi girls! Just a quick update with pics. I tried on some old bikinis and am sooo excited how they fit! :0D
I'm miserable this evening after splurging on a sodium fest today. I'm six weeks POR and seven and a half months post TT with MR. Should I still be swelling like this?!?!?! It's so uncomfortable :0( will pizza and salty snacks do this to me for the rest of my life now?!?!?
Tomorrow I start my next fitness challenge. It's just a 10 day challenge this time, but a little more strict and challenging for me. Wish me luck!
Beyond pissed off!
This is the email I received from my PS this morning after voicing my concerns...
Sorry for the delay.
I am on the same page as you, but when you say you are obsessed about
it, or keep referring to "perfection", I think I may not be able to
achieve your goals (of perfection and making an obsessed person happy).
There is the expectation of performing cosmetic surgery to improve a
cosmetic concern, then there is the expectation that cosmetic surgery
will create perfection, which is really in the eye of the beholder
(hence the problem with an obsession).
Additionally, you say you have heard of people getting numerous
revisions and in the end "get perfection". Unfortunately, that is also
the same path in which cosmetic disasters occur. A patient who is
obsessed with perfection and undergoes numerous surgeries, sometimes
goes to the point of no return.
Things will get better as you wait.
Am I wrong for feeling like this asshole is being smug and condescending? I may have unrealistic expectations, but when I know I'm not happy? Isn't it his obligation to fix it? My only problem is one implant (the right side) is sitting much higher still and more towards the outside of my rib cage. I think it's time for me to see what another ps has to say :0/ ugh.
Just thought I would add...
This is the email I sent, when I got the response I posted in my previous post.
Hi Dr Mok.
I'm a little confused as to why I have had zero aftercare. I feel
neglected and as if I've been a problem patient. I traveled 9 hours to
your office because I thought I was choosing the "perfect" surgeon! I'm
really trying to be positive about my whole experience. I think your
facility is beautiful, clean, and all of the staff and nurses are so
wonderful. I enjoyed my first consultation with you, but after that I
kinda felt like I was just anther dollar earned. As for my revision
surgery... You are a charming man and I feel safe with you, but it was
hard to make you understand my concerns. And if that other doctor (bless
her heart) didn't walk in when she did, I probably wouldn't have even
had anything done to my deformed breasts! I'm sorry I feel so depressed
about this surgery... I wish I would have never had it!
Although I'm so much happier with my revision, I still think things just
aren't right. I'm not too concerned right now because it has only been a
month. My TT scar is nice and low and pretty straight now. But, my
breasts, although better, still have issues. My right side is higher now
and toward my armpit (my left side was the major problem previously) and
it seems to be stuck there! I've been massaging and trying to get it to
move in closer to the same position as the left, but it doesn't wanna go
anywhere! I also continue to wear a tight sports bra, front zippered
closure that squeezes them in together, almost 24 hours a day! If I try
to wear any other sports bra or regular bra, I can feel that right side
laying towards my armpit, this is in a sitting or in an upright
position. When I'm working out that right boob kinda gets in my way!
Also, when looking down at my wonderful new cleavage, there is
asymmetry. My left breast is over further towards the center and my
right wants to stay towards my armpit. Did u use any internal sutures on
my left side? I don't understand how that one is staying in that
position? What exactly did you do inside my boobs? Just curious. The
scars look great so far, thank you for that! I should also say that I
wish I would have just got prices to do a lift and larger or different
implants at the time of my revision. Can you give me a price quote for
that now? I would just like to know my options in case I'm still not
satisfied once I'm all healed up. And if I had to have another revision?
What is your policy? I doubt I will be going that route but I'm just
I hope you are not offended by any of this, but I have not seen or heard
from you or Crystal to speak of and I just want my concerns documented.
I hope you don't mind me sending this email to you, I lost Crystals
Thank you for your time.
I'm anxious for these next few months of healing. I guess I'm just worried about being unhappy because my first surgery didn't turn out the way I had hoped. Just keep healing...
This was the second email I sent...
This comparison photo shows the difference in nipple location. As you
can see my left nipple did not point out before! And honestly, I like my
left breast! The nipple pointing out does not bother me, what bothers me
is the fact I have two completely different breasts now, and I didn't
before. My left breast has always been slightly larger than the right,
but symmetrical. In the photo, The one on top is 4 months after the
first surgery and the bottom is after revisions. You can also see in
this photo how much higher the right one is. I'm not arguing with you
about how I feel. As I said before, I'm happier with my breasts now than
i was after the first surgery. I do want to know why you dropped my left
implant surgically and tacked it with sutures but didn't do the same to
the right one? That's why they aren't more symmetrical! I keep hoping
this right implant will drop and even out! I will make another video to
show what I'm taking about better. It's so hard not having follow ups in
your office so I can explain in person what I'm seeing and feeling. The
pocket on my left breast was opened up more than my right, plain and
simple. My cleavage line isn't centered! When I saw you before revisions
you told me that I couldn't have cleavage, that I didn't have it before
breast augmentation, so I would not achieve it after implants. Well, I
have cleavage now! I do NOT want another surgery! I just want to be
comfortable in my own skin. That is, after all, why I had these
My tt scar is fine. The fat pockets are gone! :0) The scar is NOT
straight, but much better, and I have a dog ear, maybe? where the drain
was, but it's smoothing out I think. I'm a perfectionist and things
being straight and symmetrical are important to me! I will just tattoo
over my scar. How long should I wait to do that?
I guess I just need you to tell me that I need to give it time and it
WILL be perfect! And if I'm still not happy, you will fix it! Don't
belittle me and say "that's what it looked like before" or "one breast
being stiffer is something I have no control over" I want perfection!
And that's what I payed you for! That's what I traveled to see you for!
I spend hours everyday searching the internet and reading stories and
looking at before and afters! I'm obsessed with it!!! I do read stories
of girls that have had more than one revision done, and in the end they
get perfection! Like I said I DO NOT WANT ANOTHER SURGERY!!! But I do
want to be happy! So if these things don't work itself out? I need you
to fix it! I realize I need to give it much more time... But I would
like you to be on the same page as me and acknowledge my concerns as
valid and don't make me feel like I made a huge mistake choosing you as
Please keep in touch!
Dr Charles Mok is NOT board certified!!! I'm absolutely mortified and completely embarrassed! :0( I can't believe I was dazzled by his website and didn't actually look into him more. Now here I am, two surgeries later, and worrying I will never get the results from him that I deserve. I'm so sad :'0( how could I be such an idiot!!!
Ladies who are just starting to search for a doctor, PLEASE do ur research!!!
Not much to report... Things have been going as well as they can be expected. I'm healthy and have 100% of my activity level. My results? Well...
I reached out to Dr Mok again two weeks ago, sending him updated pics and asking once again for any advise for my breasts. He didn't respond for a week, but he finally did. Apparently he was made aware of a negative review I wrote on him, and needless to say he was not happy... I explained to him how mortified I was to find out that he was NOT board certified. He agreed to that fact, but defended himself by saying he is board certified in other expertise, just not cosmetic,and he always works with other ps that are board certified. That makes me feel a little better. He told me to give my healing more time, and if he can fix problems I might have a year or so from now, he will do it. I'm not planning any future surgeries with him, but I'm glad he acknowledges I deserve to be happy with my results.
Wow! What a process this whole journey is! I'm struggling with the scale right now. I continue to eat 90% clean and exercise daily. But, I can't seem to get that number down on the scale! I feel stronger, but I also feel "thick" in the thighs. And now that my tummy is healing and swelling subsides, the skin is loosening and the rolls are making an appearance again! Ugh. I look a thousand times better than I did tho so I'm happy! now I just need to destroy my scale and focus on my endurance. I'm thinking about training for my first half marathon in the spring! It's best to set goals, and this has got to be my next step!
Happy healing :0)
Here I am...
Here I am almost 4 months POR and I'm still unsatisfied with my results. I have zero contact with my surgeon since November 20th. I don't know if I should stay in contact with him, or if I need to just move on and search for another PS. I'm so worried that it's going to cost me a fortune to achieve the results I sooo desire :0( I'm feeling more comfortable in my own skin now. My workouts are better than ever and I feel strong. Now if I could just feel happy with my decision to have the surgery and go with Dr Mok...
What do u all think? I need advise.
These are last few emails exchanged with Dr Mok.
Forgot the last one...
This is the last time I talked to Dr Mok or anyone from his office...