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CONFESSION OF A POST OP TT PATIENT...2weeks post op! Little Rock, AR

I am 39 years of age and the mother of two. Both...

I am 39 years of age and the mother of two. Both of my children are now over the age of 18 and I feel it is time to get this body back into a shape I can be proud of. I have always been self-conscious about my abdominal area, but this only became worse after having my children. Jeans don't fit correctly, and let's not even talk about low cut bikinis...URGH! Like most women, I have also struggled with the ups and downs of my weight, but no matter how small I got I could NEVER get rid of what I call the "c-section overhang". My 40th birthday is in December, and I decided in January that this would be the year for change. I started eating healthier and exercising which are two things that I was not doing before. I even broke up with Starbucks which was heartbreaking, but necessary. So far I have lost several inches and 40 pounds to date. Even with the weight loss and frequent exercise, I am still getting nowhere fast with my abs. I was really hoping to see a major change, but no such luck. I’ve had this same problem in the past, and it has derailed me from maintaining a healthy lifestyle because I felt that there was no point to it if I was still unhappy with the way I looked even after doing all of the work. I would give up and return to all of my bad habits. I really don’t want that to happen this time. I feel that having this procedure is going to help me in staying motivated to maintain the look that I have worked to achieve.

Now, having said all of that here is something else, I have to stop smoking. Yes, I am one of “THOSE PEOPLE”. I went for my consult yesterday to discuss the tummy tuck and was informed that I need to stop smoking at least 6 weeks prior to surgery. So, surgery has been scheduled for October 15th which means that I have to stop now. I can already tell that I am going to need support, but this is something that I have needed to do for a while and have wanted to do, but just didn’t. So, change is all around, and hopefully this tummy tuck will be the thing that keeps me motivated to keep going.

I am beginning to get more nervous about this...

I am beginning to get more nervous about this since making the decision and scheduling the surgery. I can tell that my anxiety level has increased quite a bit even from yesterday. I have been reading posts from others on here, especially pertaining to the things I'll need following surgery. I have decided that I will definately go and look for a recliner today. I know that it may be cheaper to rent one, but we need a new chair anyway. Two birds.....one stone sort of thing. :-)

I still have so many questions, and I am hoping to find answers here. So glad I found this site.

Today is Day 1 of NO SMOKING. It is 7:14 a.m. and...

Today is Day 1 of NO SMOKING. It is 7:14 a.m. and I am already craving like a crazy. I am hoping that the cravings will pass soon because having this TT is more important to me than smoking and buring up my lungs. Maybe if I try to focus on how bad smoking really is then it will help me to get over the craving. Okay, that is not working so I just popped a piece of gum in my mouth. LOL

So my journey toward the TT is going to also include my ups and downs regarding having to stop smoking. I'm sure that is just what you all wanted to hear......my whining. I do promise that I will do my best to keep the whining at a minimum if at all possible. If not, then please let me know so that I will stop because whiners really get on my last nerve.

I will try to get some pics uploaded later today so that you all can see the before shots. I am finding that looking at the photos others are posting has really helped me to know what to expect during this journey. So, I apologize now in the event that I gross any of you out after viewing my pics.

Just realized that writing here is helping the craving to subside. Guess you all will be hearing A LOT from me over the next several weeks. Maybe we'll all become really good friends through all of this. :)

Just added photos that were taken today, which is...

Just added photos that were taken today, which is EXACTLY 6 weeks prior to surgery. It really is so difficult and somewhat humiliating to pose for these pictures, especially when you know the rest of the world will be able to see them. After seeing the photos, I know for sure that I have made the right decision about having surgery.

The no smoking issue has been tough today, but so far I have been successful. Not even a teeny tiny puff off of one. I cleaned out my car and wiped everything down super good, and I have avoided all outside areas where I typically smoke. Thank God we don't smoke in our house or it would be hopeless for me. I am already seeing that it is more important now than ever to really stick with my diet because otherwise I can see myself blowing up like a balloon. Need lots of support and can't wait to get to the gym tomorrow.

Ok, it's been more than 36 hours since my last...

Ok, it's been more than 36 hours since my last smoke and these craving are HORRIBLE. I keep trying to keep my eye on the prize, but this is not easy. Oh well....anything worth doing is usually difficult.

On to other things, I am finding that I really don't want to tell anyone about me having surgery. I don't mind putting it out here for y'all, but that is because I know you all understand what I am going through. My husband and children know, and my mom knows, but beyond that I just almost feel ashamed to tell others what I'm doing. Have any of you felt that way? I guess for me it's like having to admit that I can't take care of it on my own and others will see it as me taking the "easy" way out. I know that there is NOTHING about this process that is easy. If anything, just the decision to have surgery is a MAJOR thing, but I really don't want to hear the negativity from others regarding my decision and/or reasons for doing this. Just my thoughts for the moment.

It's official. I have gone a total of 48 hours...

It's official. I have gone a total of 48 hours without smoking. Yay me! I have also found out that exercise helps to take my mind off of it. So, here is the plan for tomorrow. I have the exercise ball inflated and in my office. Fortunately I work from home and no one will be able to see me huffing an puffing while doing some ab work. Maybe that will help with the transforming the whole package while preparing for my TT. OH! I also scheduled my time off from work today. So excited!

Well, so far there has been no massive explosions...

Well, so far there has been no massive explosions or blood shed. I think that must mean that I am doing pretty well with the no smoking. I have also learned that I am not the only one that is going through this at the same time as preparing for surgery. Thank those of you have been open about it. It really s***s at times that I can't just use that coping skill when getting nervous, especially when thinking about the surgery and preparing for it. Guess I'll have to find some other way of coping and socializing. LOL

I am actually feeling pretty positive today about things involving the surgery. My mom is actually planning to come and stay with me so that way I know that I won't have to worry about things around the house. Even though my hubby will be here, it is nice to know that my mom will be around to help in taking care of dinners and things. She has also been wanting to have a TT, so I guess I get to be her up close and personal experience since my dad is totally against the surgery for her. He made the mistake of telling her that I was young and could handle it.......poor dad, foot in mouth syndrome can be bad at times.

Well, I better get back to work for now. This site is waaaaaaaayyyyyyyy too addictive!

I did it! HAPPY DANCE!!!!!! I actually made it...

I did it! HAPPY DANCE!!!!!! I actually made it through 3 whole days without smoking. Cravings have decreased and I'm not obsessing over it nearly as much. Just wanted to share.

Okay, I am kicking booty and takin names when it...

Okay, I am kicking booty and takin names when it comes to this no smoking thing. Most of the time I think I am going to survive, but every once in a while I am thinking "OMG.....I need a cigarette!!!!!". For all you former smokers, you know what I mean, especially after eating. URGH!

So I have been reading on here and learning so much from all the ladies. Thank goodness I found this site because I am feeling less anxious about my decision to have my TT. If anything, I would say I am getting more excited. I have already placed an order from Amazon for a few items to help me out following surgery. So far I have ordered a toilet riser, a shower chair, and a bed wedge (which I hear will still be a nice addition to the bedroom toys once I feel better). I got the toilet riser in today, and I never knew I would be so excited about something that goes on my toilet! I mean, it raises everything a good 5 inches. With me working out and having a recent experience of doing too many squats, I can already tell you that 5 inches will make a HUGE difference. LOL I'm also looking forward to the bed wedge getting in......thinking I may need to try it out before surgery. HMMMMMM.

Anyway, an Old Navy order has also been placed cuz you know I gotta look cute following sugery. New pj's and yoga pants were needed.....AND since I will be bent over a while looking at my feet, you know I had to buy some new slippers (green ones, pink ones, and blue ones). Okay, so I bought 3 new pairs of slippers, but can you blame me???....they were the flip flop design, but fuzzy! I just couldn't help myself.

The best part of today was that I also received my cards from Care Credit....in other words, the thing that is paying for the surgery is here. So now it is just a matter of waiting until Sept 17th for the pre-op appointment so that I can pay for the procedure. Things really seem to be falling into place for me regarding this procedure. My mom even seems to be excited about coming to stay with me following the procedure. I am sure there will be some interesting twists and turns along the way, but for now I am on the ready and waiting for the green light.

I cannot believe I am made it nearly a week...

I cannot believe I am made it nearly a week without smoking. That is the first time in over 10 years that I have gone this long without a smoke. THAT is CRAZY!!!!! Crazy in a good way though. I am thinking that the worst of it is over. Even though the cravings have persisted, it isn't nearly as bad or as frequent as it was. I just keep reminding myself of the reasons that I am stopping, and it helps keep it all in perspective.

Now, if I can stick to my eating healthy, drinking ALL of my water, and exercising, then I should be prepared for surgery and weighing less. I don't know if it is the no smoking thing or what, but I seem to be having a rough time with the eating and drinking my water over the past week or so. It's so strange. So, I am about to head for the jump for Camp Plyo-Pump. Wish me luck i dropping a few more pounds between now and October 5th, cuz I really think I need all the luck I can get.

Oh.....forgot to mention this, but I've received...

Oh.....forgot to mention this, but I've received the shower chair yesterday. So yesterday was like Christmas for post surgical items. eheheheheh

WHY???? WHY DID I JUST DO THAT????? HOLY...

WHY???? WHY DID I JUST DO THAT????? HOLY CRAP!!!!!! I just watched the video on TT w/Lipo on You Tube. What the hell was I thinkin!?! I mean, I know what the plan is, but I should NEVER have actually watched that! I must be freaking insane. I hate that I have a need to know all of this stuff, but good LORD that was scary! So, lesson of the day ladies, if you know the plan and are okay with what you know.....DO NOT WATCH THE VIDEO!

Wow, I cannot believe that it has been a week...

Wow, I cannot believe that it has been a week already that I haven't smoked. I know that is an accomplishment, but I am still craving that cigarette with my morning coffee. So with it being early, most of you can imagine that I am missing my smokes really bad about now. This quitting cold turkey is for the birds (no pun intended). I suppose that is my own fault though since I knew I would have to stop for surgery. Oh well......enough whining about that.

Yesterday I realized how much easier things are going to be for me once I have my extra baggage removed. I was shaving, and it occurred to me that this is going to get so much easier after surgery. I will be able to bend over without feeling as if my belly is stopping me from breathing when shaving my lower legs, I will be able to shave my upper thighs without having to move the extra out of the way, and I will actually be able to see my lady parts to ensure that I am not missing anything. TMI, I like to provide hubby with a clean workspace, but it is really difficult to do that whenever you can't see a dang thing because of having so much extra in the way. That doesn't even speak to how much better I am going to feel when putting on clothes. I mean, who want to feel as if they have an ass in the front as well as in the back???? It gets ridiculous the things we go through just to try to make ourselves feel better about our bodies. I'm just wishing that I had scheduled this surgery years ago. I think it would have certainly played a HUGE roll in helping me to take better care of myself. At least now I am doing something about it and it has helped with more than just eating healthy and exercising.......it is helping me to stop smoking. DANG....again, should have done this YEARS ago.

I am so f'n pissed right now. My husband, whom I...

I am so f'n pissed right now. My husband, whom I love and adore, just told his mother that I was having surgery. I cannot believe he would do that knowing how I feel about my mother-in-law knowing anything about my surgery. Now I am going to have to go through an inquisition about what was "wrong" and "what type of surgery did you have". What type of "female surgery" did you have. I mean SERIOUSLY.....did this man not THINK that he was telling a female that I am having female sugery of some sort. I know that he tried to give as little information as possible, but any information is too much in this case. He told me that he had to say something because she and other family member are planning to come up a few weeks after my surgery has been completed. In my mind I am thinking.....okay, by then I should be walking a straighter and my drains should be out. Seems like she would be none the wiser about surgery until he opened his mouth. If I am wrong, then someone please tell me. By the way, this is the most angry I have been since I stopped smoking, and all I wanna do is smoke right now. *I will not smoke....I will not smoke....I will not smoke*

5 weeks from I will have an itty bitty tummy........

5 weeks from I will have an itty bitty tummy......I'll be on some good drugs.....and I will be thrilled as long as I am asleep. LOL I actually got a phone call from the doctor's office today wanting to know if I was still ready to do this and to remind me to stop smoking. I was so thrilled that I was able to tell them that I quit smoking 8 days ago. The nurse sounded really pleased with that. I then told her all about this site and how great it is to be able to connect with others that are either currently experiencing or have already experienced the TT journey. She sounded like she had never heard of the site, so I will soooooo be telling Dr. Yee all about it for future patients. So, next Monday is my pre-op visit, and I need to have my list of questions prepared.

Now on to the important business at hand......I missed my new friends on here today. So sorry that lil thing called work got in my way. Cry shame that I have to work in order to pay for the TT that brought us all together.....hey wait a minute......maybe I should be thanking both the flabby belly and the job for bringing us together. So as the infamous speech goes...."First I would like to thank the the exhusband (arse hole) who knocked me during my junior year of high school .....next the two people who helped to ruin my belly to the point of needing a TT, I love you my children....then I would like to pay homage to polycystic ovarian disease that prompted my total hysterectomy at age 23......and please let's not forget the weight that has been there and left me wanting for nothing but a skinny body most of my adult life.....it is you.....all of you that have made this moment possible. Thank you for bringing these wonderful funny women into my life. I knew it you liked me....you really like me."

WOW! The things you can learn we learn along the...

WOW! The things you can learn we learn along the way on this journey. Over the last several days, things have been tense around my house. I thought that part of it was because I wasn't smoking, but then I started noticing that hubby was getting really snippy over lil things. I didn't get it.....was it his time of the month or something??? Geez......anyway as things usually do, it all came out last night. We were talking and I told him that I had really gotten angry over him telling his mother about my surgery. Then he said, "I just don't understand why it isn't okay to tell my family, but you can tell your family." Okay, this when I get defensive because I haven't wanted ANYONE to know, but have only shared the information with "need to know" people. After asking the all important question of the day, "Why is it so important to tell your mother?" I then learn that my hubby is scared of me having surgery. He has been really supportive, so this really caught me off guard. Hubby wanted to tell his mother because he was scared and needed someone to be there for him. So now I feel like I have earned the Crappy Wife of the Year Award for getting mad at him. I just wasn't expecting that sort of reaction from him. After talking a little bit more I learned that he was not as knowledgable about the procedure as I thought he was. Now this is a man that does his research, but he turned into a big baby when it comes to the thought of me having what he calls a "major surgery". I literally had to explain things to him. I even encouraged him to get on this site to read more about the experiences to help in giving him a better idea of what can be expected, although I must admit that I like not having any immediate family on here and can say whatever I feel without their judgement. So, now that I have shared all of this information......have any of you gone through this with your significant others? I hope that the talk we had helped some last night, but I'm not sure yet. All I know is that he brought home a back scrubber for when I have surgery since he knows I will have issues trying to shower. Very sweet. AGAIN.....CRAPPY WIFE OF THE YEAR AWARD!

OMG.....my back is freakin killing me about now. ...

OMG.....my back is freakin killing me about now. I haven't even had surgery yet, so I can imagine how bad the main event will be....URGH. I guess this is the sympathy pains I am feeling for my girls that have already been through the war and are on R&R right now. Girls, just know that I am preparing for battle so that I will be a good soldier when the time comes.

Few updates, got my wedge in yesterday and I was so excited. Hubby seemed pretty interested to, especially when I told him that the thoughts on how it could be used just added a little spring to my step. I was really hoping to try some fun things with it before using it during recovery. :) I also got a call from the doc's office today confirming my appointment for Monday. So now I have to start on my list of questions and get ready to drop a ton of money. I have to admit that this is one medical bill that I won't mind paying. AND did I tell you I just bought an iPad to keep me company? I justified it to hubby by telling him while rocking the pouty face that it would just make things so much easier for me rather than holding my laptop. Let me just say that I really did marry a good one.

For the very first time in my life I just looked...

For the very first time in my life I just looked in the mirror and thought......girl you are goon look hot after getting the belly done. I mean I have asset of boobs and a butt that really look good. I have a nice hourglass shape until turning to the side. Once this belly is gone.....there will be no stopping me. I WILL BE ONE LIL HOT TAMALE! Yes, feeling quite full of myself at the moment. LOL

Got my order of pj's and yoga pants in today, so...

Got my order of pj's and yoga pants in today, so looks like I will have comfy cute clothes to wear follow surgery. Now I need to start collecting the little things like bandages. More importantly I have got to start on a list of question. Think I'll start on those now.

Okay, I have been dealing with some back pain all...

Okay, I have been dealing with some back pain all week. Finally saw my chiropractor for an adjustment yesterday. The pain has kept me out of the gym most of the week, and this has been very frustrating to me. I feel that I should be working out harder and getting stronger before surgery instead of slacking off. This pain is really starting to get to me especially when I know I will have a lot more pain to deal with in the coming weeks. So looks like I am not going to do anything other than take care of this back today so that maybe, just maybe I'll be back in the gym tomorrow.

Tomorrow is my pre-op day. I was really hoping to...

Tomorrow is my pre-op day. I was really hoping to have lost some more weight, but between this back issue and no smoking, losing weight just has not happened. I still have 4 weeks until surgery, so maybe I can get a few more pounds off between now and then. Outside of that I think I am ready. As of 8:30 tonight it will have 2 weeks since my last cigarette. Still wishing I could smoke at times, but I've stayed true to my goal. I know this will help a lot when it comes to my healing. I've also got my list of questions together for the doc. I've encouraged hubby to do the same because he was concerned about the procedure. Do you think he has done that yet? NO! Oh well. I figure as long as my questions are answered then it should be fine since I am the one going through all of this after all.

Is it weird to be excited about my pre-op visit? I guess I am excited about learning the answers to my questions and having a definitive surgery time. That will all make it more "real" for me. I'll update tomorrow, till then ladies.....have a good one.

FYI......no longer as frustrated. LOL

FYI......no longer as frustrated. LOL

Well, I just arrived at the doc's office and...

Well, I just arrived at the doc's office and sitting here waiting to stat my Pre-op appt. Really excited about this. OMG, I gotta pee! Is anyone anyone else like that when they ate both excited and nervous?

Pre-op appointment done and went straight to have...

Pre-op appointment done and went straight to have my lab work completed. So now I am treating myself to lunch and then on a mini shopping spree to Walgreens. Come surgery day, exactly 4weeks from now, I will be ready to rock and roll.

So I haven't been on here in a few days. I was...

So I haven't been on here in a few days. I was getting a little depressed because I thought I was going to have to push my surgery date back due to financial issues. Talk about a HUGE let down. I mean, it has been difficult enough to make the decision, stop smoking, and then go and stand naked to have pre-op pics made. Then throw in a hiccup regarding the finances of it all and I was just ready to have a melt down. Fortunately it looks like that issue was resolved as quickly as it came along. I apparently have THE BEST HUBBY EVER even for telling his family about my surgery. This man has assured me that we are still good to go for surgery on Oct, 15th. Thank goodness I have him for support through all of this.

I am so ready for Oct 15th to get here. I know I...

I am so ready for Oct 15th to get here. I know I should try to put it out of my mind, but I am having the worst time in doing that. I keep thinking about how happy I am going to be with that change in my body. I actually told my daughter that I feel like I will have a BANGIN BODY once all of this is done. I have never felt that way about myself before. I think it will be an awesome feeling to look in the mirror and just be thrilled with what I see. So in the mean time, watch my diet, drink my water, and exercise exercise exercise.

Good morning ladies...hope those of you post op...

Good morning ladies...hope those of you post op are feeling well, and those of you pre op are not making yourselves crazy with anticipation. Me on the other hand, let's just say I am having a little help in the crazy department. First off, we all know that I stopped smoking nearly 3weeks ago. I thought THAT was going to be the worst part of my journey, and more than that my family thought so too. The first 3 days were the worst as my husband and daughter were running for cover like coch roaches when turning on a light. After a few days of that things got better....thank God for Prozac and hormone replacement therapy(HRT). Oh yeah, forgot to mention I had a full hysterectomy at age 23. So the hormones have kept me in check all this time. Well, we are rockin along for a couple of weeks until having that glorious pre op appointment. I know we are all so excited to get all of our info and scripts, and well EVERYTHING regarding dos and dont's. Some of us....ME...like to ignore things until we absolutely have to deal with them. Yes, the craziness is upon us. So now I am here telling you all that I must be off my HRT for 2 weeks prior to surgery and 2 weeks following surgery. So in my thinking I will just wean myself off by not changing patches on time and going from two patches a week to one patch. Guess whose down to one patch this week....yep, that would be me. So I am sure that there will be family members jumping out of windows sticking needles in their necks just to get away from me, AKA.....THE GROSS NIGHT SWEATY, DON'T STAND TO CLOSE TO THE OPEN FLAME, COMBUSTIBLE, EMOTIONAL, SUPER BITCH.

So if you all see the news in which a woman in Arkansas spontaneously bursts into flames while crying because her family dared to breathe the same air, it was me.

Wow, just when I think this roller coaster is...

Wow, just when I think this roller coaster is slowing down we enter a dark tunnel full of twists and turns. Over the weekend I started to worry about possibly having dog ears following surgery. So today I called to ask if the doc felt Dog ears would be a problem. So the nurse pulls my pics and the doc reviews them. About an hour later the nurse calls back and says, "for you to get the best results you need lipo on your hips and waistline." Now lipo of upper and lower abs was already planned, but this extra is well....EXTRA in costs too. I expected it to be a little more in costs, but an additional $3600 was not expected. Not only that, why wasn't this extra suggested at my consult??? Needless to say I was freaking out and then learned that I wasn't going to get the full benefits without having the extra caused to freak out more. I was just about resigned to the fact that I was going to have a less than perfect result because of this. Thankfully I have a wonderful hubby that talked me off the ledge. He told me thatI need to go ahead and have it all taken care of at the same time. He said he wanted me to be happy with the results once this is said and done. He even told me not to worry about the money situation. Damn.....how did I ever get so lucky to have married him. So the coaster s slowing down and I see lights again at the end of the tunnel.

2 1/2 weeks to go before I enter the flat side...

2 1/2 weeks to go before I enter the flat side with my girls that have already made it there. I have been checking out the updates, and everyone seems to be doing really well with their healing. After seeing the before and after pics, I find that I get really excited thinking that I am going to be like that soon. I still have a hard time believing that this is happening. I am really doing this. I still feel a little selfish about spending all that money when I know what I could be doing with it, but I also know that this is going to help me feel better about me. I think I am going to be more confident in my own skin by the time this is done. I am so excited!!!!

Whew girls.....I do believe it must be 200 degrees...

Whew girls.....I do believe it must be 200 degrees.....make that 300. Who turned on the oven and shut me inside without telling me? AND where the hell are these whiskers coming from? Surely I am not turning into a cat.....WTF? Oh wait a minute, I remember now, no HRT. Dang! Talk about no fun and total lack of sleep. Fortunately I haven't detonated and sent my family into orbit for breathing my air, so I am thinking this really must be progress. Although my patience is running thin because I am so ready to have all of this over and done so I can show off my itty bitty tummy like the rest of you. I was looking at my overhang earlier today and thought "go away". That is the one area of my body that just really bugs me. I know everything else is looking good because I am now getting compliments from total strangers in front of their wives....AWKWARD!!! And check this....even my panties are getting too big. I just bought these a few weeks back and now they are feeling a little droopy. So once I get this belly done and I am back on HRT.....l should be on top of the world, especially concerning the way I feel about my body. This is certainly feeling like a battle between the lack of hormones and no smoking......JUST CALL ME SHEERAH.....TT WARRIOR

2 weeks from today I will be blissfully laid up...

2 weeks from today I will be blissfully laid up under the sedation of some REALLY good drugs. I will be on the flat side and I will be thinking "who dropped that truck on my head". Then I am sure to give a little chuckle because I won't care at all. Just thinking about it makes me super excited. So to all my new peeps having surgery this week....good luck to you all and as for the person that dropped the truck on your head......he went that way. LOL

Well....the battle rages on. I just called the...

Well....the battle rages on. I just called the doc because of this post nasal drip, sore throat, and ear ache. Gotta love this right before surgery. Thankfully she has ordered me a Z-pack. So to you sickness.....I'm about to put a beat down on you before you even think about getting in my way of having this TT. Whooorah

Me - hormone replacement= very easily irritated at...

Me - hormone replacement= very easily irritated at the hubby

I haven't posted much this week because I have had...

I haven't posted much this week because I have had a lot going on. This sore throat is VERY persistent, but I am still battling it with a Z pack and Hall's cough drops.

I also had another hiccup with the finances of the surgery since we added on additional lipo, but thankfully that has been resolved. If the closing date from the sale of some real estate went through on time then it would not have been an issue, but things happen. I'm just glad that has been taken care of so my stress level is back down again.

I'm still feeling a crazy at this point due to a lack of hormones. I don't know if I am more excited to have a flat belly or be done with surgery so I can have my hormones back again. That one is a toss up at the moment.

All in all I am more than ready to be on the flat side. 5 weeks ago I was thinking that it was going to feel like forever before I had surgery....now, I am just a week away and getting more excited, anxious, scared, happy, elated, fearful.....oh you get the point.

A week from now I will be gearing up to have...

A week from now I will be gearing up to have surgery. Still so hard to believe it is almost here.

I am having the worst time keeping my head in the...

I am having the worst time keeping my head in the game for work.....and I have only been online for 10 minutes. My brain is already thinking about things that will be happening a week from now. I will be both excited and very nervous and dreading the hour long car ride there. I know my mother will be asking me a hundred times how I'm doing, and my poor hubby will be doing his nervous little tick thing. My dad will be telling me that I can always change my mind because I am perfect just the way that I am. As much as I know all of these things will happen, I also know that it is going to get on my last nerve. I really don't wanna be mean before surgery, but as my hubby pointed out yesterday....my lack of hormones have not helped in this area. I don't even know when I am being mean. Usually I could take pride in being mean on purpose....not that I really ever was mean, but it drives me crazy that I am being mean and not even realizing it. That is part of the reason my postings have significantly decreased from both this site and Facebook. I miss my hormones soooooooooooooooo much. Still wondering what I am most excited over....having a flat belly or being back on my hormones. I going with the hormones today. The flat belly will just be the icing on the cake. I know that sounds weird since the whole focus has been a flat belly, but dang it, I miss my hormones!!!!!

I am finding that I am looking in the mirror a lot...

I am finding that I am looking in the mirror a lot these days, and I haven't even had surgery yet. I am pokin and pullin and pushin the skin all around so I can have some sort of idea what I will finally look like after it is all said and done. Of course I am doing the tightening up thing to see just how much extra there is. When lying on the bed I allow it to all fall to one side just so half of me can feel like a skinny minny. I know that sounds a little weird, but I know I am not the only one out here that is doing silly things like that. I am so ready for Monday to get here that I could just scream.....but then again I am sure to scream with delight once I see that tiny LIL tummy that will belong to me.

Is anyone else having problems or had problems...

Is anyone else having problems or had problems sleeping PRIOR to surgery? I know my hormones have a little to do with it, but I have been awake all night. I TRIED to sleep, but I just wasn't getting anywhere with it. So here I am.....up and at em waaaayyyyy to early. Maybe I'll be productive in getting some things done today......NAH

It has been 19 years ago since I gave birth to my...

It has been 19 years ago since I gave birth to my last baby. She was a tiny little thing with copper colored hair....Most women would spend a fortune trying to get that color. So there I was 20 years old with a beautiful baby girl and a rowdy two year old boy. I knew right then and there that the baby making days were over for me. Today I am asking myself why in the world did it take nearly half of my life to decided to have a TT? Weight, money, support? I don't know. What I do know is this....come Monday (wow, that song just popped in my head) I will be on the flat side for the first time in my adult life. Lord help me because I can foresee myself acting all sorts of crazy while having a bangin little body. My poor hubby....hopefully I won't scare him too badly. LOL.

ANYWAY, why is it most of us have waited so long to feel good about our bodies? Also, yesterday I saw some postings about concern about the message being sent to our daughters. I even asked my husband for his opinion on this, and he answered with.....why does it have to be a message? Like all women....we know EVERYTHING we do sends a message. So here is the message to my daughter....if you are unhappy with your body, it is OKAY to do something about it....lose weight, exercise, be healthy, and if that still doesn't get you where you want to be then know that I WILL SUPPORT YOU in your decision for surgery if it comes to it. I want my daughter to know that she has the love and support of a woman that truly UNDERSTANDS what it is like to have these issues, yet be courageous enough to do something about it. It is time, no.....it is past time to finally love the body I see in the mirror.

Well,I've heard from Liz at Dr. Yee's office, and...

Well,I've heard from Liz at Dr. Yee's office, and I am scheduled for surgery Monday at 12:45, but have to be there at 11:30. Of course I will be starving and thirsty by then, but who cares?!? FLAT SIDE....HERE I COME!!

I think that the family has decided that since I...

I think that the family has decided that since I am having surgery, then I should be the only one cleaning. That's okay.....their time is coming because I'll be home ALL DAY EVERYDAY after surgery. That means that I will find plenty of things for them to do, and since I can't do anything, guess who will complain until things are done. Yes, I see my evil plan falling into place very nicely. Take that hubby and daughter.....you will remember this day or else I shall remind you of it frequently in the coming weeks. Bahhahahahahahh

Well, I was really hoping to get some sleep prior...

Well, I was really hoping to get some sleep prior to surgery, but it looks like that isn't going to be happening for me. I flip and flop all night, and the night sweats are TERRIBLE. Just a little while longer and I will be flat and back on my hormones to prevent the night sweats. I've got a feeling that this is going to be THE LONGEST DAY EVER.

Wow, my day is finally here. Six weeks ago I just...

Wow, my day is finally here. Six weeks ago I just knew this day would never get her, but look......it HAS arrived. It still seems somewhat unbelievable at this point. Maybe that is because I am allowed to have liquids until 8 am.....nah. It seems unbelievable because I am about to have that itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face.....whoa, sorry, there I go with Sir Mix-A-Lot. Anywho, I am doing something I never dreamed would be possible. I've pretty much been awake since 3am (cue Matchbox 20 in the background) and I suppose the excitement is what has me awake. It's weird, but I really don't feel nervous at all. Now when we get to the surgery center I will probably need a Valium and an Ativan, but for now I am cool. I'll be checking in quite a bit today. Surgery is in T minus 7 hrs 11 minutes 45, 44, 43.........

I get to drink for another 34 minutes.

I get to drink for another 34 minutes.

Surgery was delayed for a little while. Currently...

Surgery was delayed for a little while. Currently waiting on the doc to come in to draw on me. IV is in and I be been weighed and had more pics taken. By the way....guess who lost weight....yeah, that would be me. Even after all the stress eating I lost weight....BEST DAY EVER!

STILL WAITING! OMG....when are they gonna get to...

STILL WAITING! OMG....when are they gonna get to me? I am thirsty and hungry and very soon to be EXTREMELY irritable unless there is a change in the status very soon

Sorry I hadn't posted anything.....can't see ...

Sorry I hadn't posted anything.....can't see things in focus right now. One I can see agin, I will write mow. Just know that I an okay, and well taken care of. Pleas forgiv for spelling issues.

So sorry it has been a few days. My vision as been...

So sorry it has been a few days. My vision as been blurry as a result of my fabulous drugs. Pain hasn't really been an issue since I have been popping a pain pill every 4 hours on the dot. I'm going to start spreading those out today if possible. The hardest thing I have had to deal with is being able to get out of my recliner on my own. A lift chair may have been better than a recliner, but sleeping in this thing sure is nice.

I have seen the doc and now have 2 garments, and by the way, the Spanx one feels good! Anyway, I will try to check a little today. Still having issues with my vision, but had to stop by and catch up with you if I could.

Brain is still not quite functioning correctly.

Brain is still not quite functioning correctly.

Meds must be finally working their way out of my...

Meds must be finally working their way out of my system. I can see fairly well now. Wow....I didn't think it would take me so long to post. Sorry if I worried any of you, but when the vision is blurry it makes it difficult to write.

Anyway, I finally made it to the flat side, but quiet frankly I feel like one of those link sausages about to explode from its casing. You know how it looks when you put one in the microwave for too long??? Yeah, that's how I feel. Outside of the constant squeeze of the garment and burning sensation when trying to get up, I think I am doing really well. All of the above was what I expected. One thing I did not expect was having EXTREME difficulties in getting out of my recliner......OH, and peeing. My goodness what is up with that? Put me and an old dude with prostate issues side by side and I swear he'd finish before me. The peeing issue has been weird, but it is improving. Thankful to have my parents with me throughout the day. It's actually nice to have someone babying me for a change. So for all my TT sisters.....rest, relax, and heal. Much love to you all.

Feeling better each day. Still haven't had a BM,...

Feeling better each day. Still haven't had a BM, but I think my mother is more concerned about that at the moment than I am. I just worry about the getting up and down, and this SWELLING that makes me look as if I have thunder thighs. One thing is for sure, having support has allowed me the time I needed to help the healing process. I haven't tried doing too much too fast because I had the help. I hear about some women that seem to be healing faster than me, but who cares!?!? It isn't like we are racing to get to the finish line. I think we all just want to feel better in general. So for those of you about to have surgery, take your time, let others baby you, and allow yourself to heal. Hugs to you all!

We have progress!!!!! Happy to report that we...

We have progress!!!!! Happy to report that we finally have had a BM! Yay!!!!!

I must admit that I am THRILLED that I am no...

I must admit that I am THRILLED that I am no longer smoking. I think I would have suffocated if I had continued because the swelling and compression garments make it difficult as it is. URGH.....otherwise I am feeling pretty good. My dad took me to get Starbucks this morning, and that certainly helped with the BM issue. Then I got a shower all by myself....which was a HUGE accomplishment. All was going well until trying to get in my garment by myself, but thankfully my mom was here to help. She is actually going home today and leaving me to the care of my hubby and daughter. So, we will see how that goes. All I know is that if I were them, I'd take really good care of me cuz that LIL lady can be BIG TROUBLE. LOL. I LOVE MY MOM. Gonna go check out reviews on my peeps. Talk to you soon.

Well, I went until just now without a pain pill,...

Well, I went until just now without a pain pill, but with all the swelling and the back ache....it was time.

Hey there ladies. I am trying to figure out if I...

Hey there ladies. I am trying to figure out if I just ignored this bit of info or nobody really said anything about it, but the cooter pepper is hurtin! I know we all ask for our incision to be as low as possible, and our dear sweet wonderful PS do the best they can. In my case my PS was AMAZING. My scar is so low that if it were any lower my clit would have been cut, and you know that would have been a VERY BAD THING. Anyway, we all have soreness, itching, and swelling at our incision sites.....now apply all of that to the super low cut and you have a very sore cooter pepper. I've heard of people talking about the swelling and looking like a Ken doll, but I really didn't associate pain with it. So in case there is someone else like me out there.....it causes the cooter pepper to be achy, and not in the "wanna love you long time" sorta way.

Here are some new pics from the journey. I still...

Here are some new pics from the journey. I still find that I am critical when I see all the lumps in the pics. I keep having to remind myself that I am still swollen so that way I keep from being depressed about what I see. There is NO DOUBT I am happy with the result, but I want to see the end results now rather than having to wait several weeks to catch a glimpse of it.

Here are some new pics from the journey. I still...

Here are some new pics from the journey. I still find that I am critical when I see all the lumps in the pics. I keep having to remind myself that I am still swollen so that way I keep from being depressed about what I see. There is NO DOUBT I am happy with the result, but I want to see the end results now rather than having to wait several weeks to catch a glimpse of it.

Good morning ladies, how is everyone doing? Me,...

Good morning ladies, how is everyone doing? Me, well since you asked, this garment is squeezing me to death. I mean, I know it is a CG therefore its job is to compress things, but this is ridiculous. I am trying to figure out if I am sore because of the lipo or sore from all this constant squeezing. Either way this is no fun. I guess I am destined to be wishing my life away. 6 weeks ago all I wanted was for my surgery to hurry up and get here. Now, All I want is for 6 weeks to pass so that I can start to feel somewhat normal again. I suppose this is just part of the craziness that is expected.

Good morning ladies, how is everyone doing? Me,...

Good morning ladies, how is everyone doing? Me, well since you asked, this garment is squeezing me to death. I mean, I know it is a CG therefore its job is to compress things, but this is ridiculous. I am trying to figure out if I am sore because of the lipo or sore from all this constant squeezing. Either way this is no fun. I guess I am destined to be wishing my life away. 6 weeks ago all I wanted was for my surgery to hurry up and get here. Now, All I want is for 6 weeks to pass so that I can start to feel somewhat normal again. I suppose this is just part of the craziness that is expected.

I had to go for a post op visit today. While I...

I had to go for a post op visit today. While I was there they took out both drains (YIPEE!!!!) and the sutures in my belly button. I happened to look over and caught a glimpse of this woman leaned back in a chair and I was a little jealous. That woman had one of those sexy lil tummies....you know the kind you see in on a model or something. I was thinking "Damn, why couldn't the doc make me look like that?" Seriously, this chick had it going on. It then occurred to me that if I could see her, then she could see me. I went to move my arms to cover my belly and realized that Miss Hottie was mimicking me....then I saw her face, and it was me. I am Miss Hottie with the sexy belly. Talk about shock. I couldn't believe it was actually me. All I have seen since surgery is the hunched over version of a black, blue, and swollen me. I'm telling you it was crazy. Hell, I was so hot looking that I wanted to do me and I'm not even in to chicks! Definitely felt a boost to my ego.....now I need to heal up so I can whip this new body out on my hubby. I think he is going to be VEEEEERRRRRRRRYYYYYY happy with my results. By the way, we all need to remember that our pics are NOT doing us justice. We all look soooooo much better than the pics are showing.

I had to go for a post op visit today. While I...

I had to go for a post op visit today. While I was there they took out both drains (YIPEE!!!!) and the sutures in my belly button. I happened to look over and caught a glimpse of this woman leaned back in a chair and I was a little jealous. That woman had one of those sexy lil tummies....you know the kind you see in on a model or something. I was thinking "Damn, why couldn't the doc make me look like that?" Seriously, this chick had it going on. It then occurred to me that if I could see her, then she could see me. I went to move my arms to cover my belly and realized that Miss Hottie was mimicking me....then I saw her face, and it was me. I am Miss Hottie with the sexy belly. Talk about shock. I couldn't believe it was actually me. All I have seen since surgery is the hunched over version of a black, blue, and swollen me. I'm telling you it was crazy. Hell, I was so hot looking that I wanted to do me and I'm not even in to chicks! Definitely felt a boost to my ego.....now I need to heal up so I can whip this new body out on my hubby. I think he is going to be VEEEEERRRRRRRRYYYYYY happy with my results. By the way, we all need to remember that our pics are NOT doing us justice. We all look soooooo much better than the pics are showing.

Oh holy crap!!!!!!!!!! I just sneezed. NOT GOOD!

Oh holy crap!!!!!!!!!! I just sneezed. NOT GOOD!

So I have been sleeping in the recliner since...

So I have been sleeping in the recliner since having surgery. I have missed my bed soooooo much. I know that some people think Disneyland is the greatest place on earth, but no.......the greatest place on earth is my bed. It is so super soft and comfy. I have a great mattress that I put a feather bed on top of. Cover that with soft high thread count sheets and a down comforter and it is absolute heaven. I have missed my bed so much, but have really missed having my hubby next to me throughout the night. So last night I try to get in my bed. I even take a pain pill and a sleep aide to ensure that I am comfortable. I mean, who wouldn't be comfortable sleeping surrounded by super softness everywhere? There I am with all my pillows, including the wedge thinking that this is going to be a breeze. I get everything arranged.....wedge at my head for elevation and pillows under my knees. Surely this will be the most comfortable position. I lay back and then I have to get back up. Who the heck put concrete in my bed? Someone must have thought it would be funny to play such a joke, but I don't see any on the sheets....no, it all feels normal when smoothing it out with my hands. Lets try it again.....nope STILL feels like lying on concrete. Maybe it's the position of the pillows. So I rearrange them all. Wedge down by my knees.....other pillows at my head. OMG! What is going on?? I still cannot lay in this bed!! Talk about hurt feelings.... I just knew it would work, but no. For now my super sensitive body will remain in the recliner. Never thought it would be impossible to stay in my bed, but apparently I was wrong.

So I have been sleeping in the recliner since...

So I have been sleeping in the recliner since having surgery. I have missed my bed soooooo much. I know that some people think Disneyland is the greatest place on earth, but no.......the greatest place on earth is my bed. It is so super soft and comfy. I have a great mattress that I put a feather bed on top of. Cover that with soft high thread count sheets and a down comforter and it is absolute heaven. I have missed my bed so much, but have really missed having my hubby next to me throughout the night. So last night I try to get in my bed. I even take a pain pill and a sleep aide to ensure that I am comfortable. I mean, who wouldn't be comfortable sleeping surrounded by super softness everywhere? There I am with all my pillows, including the wedge thinking that this is going to be a breeze. I get everything arranged.....wedge at my head for elevation and pillows under my knees. Surely this will be the most comfortable position. I lay back and then I have to get back up. Who the heck put concrete in my bed? Someone must have thought it would be funny to play such a joke, but I don't see any on the sheets....no, it all feels normal when smoothing it out with my hands. Lets try it again.....nope STILL feels like lying on concrete. Maybe it's the position of the pillows. So I rearrange them all. Wedge down by my knees.....other pillows at my head. OMG! What is going on?? I still cannot lay in this bed!! Talk about hurt feelings.... I just knew it would work, but no. For now my super sensitive body will remain in the recliner. Never thought it would be impossible to stay in my bed, but apparently I was wrong.

I feel like I have done a billion sit ups today. ...

I feel like I have done a billion sit ups today. I suppose it is the muscle repairing and nerves coming back online. This is uncomfortable to say the very least.

I know that I was blessed with a set of ta-tas...

I know that I was blessed with a set of ta-tas that a lot of women pay good money to get, and I'm not saying that to be boastful or arrogant . I have always had a love hate relationship with my breast because I was either young and embarrassed by their size or overweight and did not appreciate them because I was big all over. Today I took some more pictures......all without my clothes on. Just getting the usual updated shots of the work that was done. I also decided to put on clothes today....you know, something other than pj pants. I know it isn't much of a step up, but I put on yoga pants and a tshirt. HOLY COW! Look at that....I have a little waist and big boobs. My shape is EXACTLY what I dreamed of all these years. My boobs are awesome! Dr. Yee is wonderful and I am so very grateful I found her.

Hello ladies....how is everyone doing today? For...

Hello ladies....how is everyone doing today? For me, I'm not so sure. There is A LOT going on in my brain today. First, I have to admit that I have done a VERY bad thing. I put on a hormone patch last night. I was not supposed to do that until Monday, but I did it anyway. The constant fluctuation of internal temp was just getting to be too much, especially when the zingers are creating more hot flashes for me. Also, I have been feeding my face all the bad things that I KNOW I shouldn't. You know chocolate milkshakes, chocolate brownies, Mac & cheese, etc. I haven't eaten these things in nearly a year. What the heck is going on? So there is my confession of what I've done. Now, the things I haven't done, but have thought about....SEX. OMG, I have been thinking about it nearly non-stop over the past several days. I would LOVE to jump my hubby's bones until he begged for mercy. I even tried to get hubby on board with the idea, but that man has got some willpower. It must have carried over from his first marriage since he said they only had sex once or twice per year. anyway, I guess I should be glad that at least one of us is making sure I follow post op instructions otherwise I could be putting myself at risk for developing seromas and other issues associated with complications from being to active too soon. I have also been jonesing for a cigarette today. Again, this has been on the brain, but I HAVE NOT smoked. A few days ago I was so glad that I haven't been smoking, but today I'm thinking about it. Thankfully I'm too chicken s*** too go against doc wishes or else I'd probably be firing up right now. One more thing, I haven't been cleaning or anything.....really trying to follow my doc instructions, but this family of mine needs to do a LIL better on cleaning cuz this house is also getting on my last damn nerve. Confessions....y'all got any you want to share?

Oh goodness, Yesterday was a VERYbusy day. I went...

Oh goodness, Yesterday was a VERYbusy day. I went back to work,went for my 2 week post-op appointment, and attended a party. I also slept sooooooooo good last night. As for my checkup, the tape was changed again, and I was told that I am healing very nicely. I have been given the okay to start walking upright instead of like an old lady. I can also start with light cardio.....whatever that is. So another appointment is scheduled for next week to start my after photos. I really need tone eating better foods so I will look great in my pics. So if I can stop smoking for 2months, then Icansurely get back on my diet hardcore. Wish me luck! Bythe way.....I wore jeans yesterday!
Little Rock Facial Plastic Surgeon

I have spoken to a few of doctors in LR, but Dr. Yee was by far the most down to earth and personable I have met. She has an EXTREMELY good reputation, and her credentials are out of this world. Dr. Yee's staff has also been so great calling me and checking to ensure my question are answered. They have also been so supportive regarding my efforts to stop smoking.

5 out of 5 stars Overall rating
5 out of 5 stars Doctor's bedside manner
5 out of 5 stars Answered my questions
5 out of 5 stars After care follow-up
5 out of 5 stars Time spent with me
5 out of 5 stars Phone or email responsiveness
5 out of 5 stars Staff professionalism & courtesy
5 out of 5 stars Payment process
5 out of 5 stars Wait times
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