What Price Vanity? Beware the Slippery Slope into Hideouness - New Jersey

I never considered using fillers or having "work" done on my face until I lost a lot weight due to an illness and developed sunken cheeks and sagging skin. Over the course of two years, I went from looking younger than my years to looking old enough to be asked if I wanted senior discounts (I am a few years shy of that yet). I read about Ulthera and it sounded like a good, non invasive solution. Not only was it excruciatingly painful, it seemed to melt away what little padding I had left in my lower face and made me look even older and saggier. I should have stopped right there and Cut my losses. But no, I Instead started to consider fillers. Based on what I read, I thought I'd get a consult for radiesse. It was touted as being particularly good for filling lost volume, and that it was long lasting, which appealed to me. No where did I read that this could not be desolved or reversed if the results were bad, nor did the doctor mention this. He injected it too close to the surface and it migrated down near the sides of my mouth, forming into hard, pea-shaped lumps that show through the skin. It also created deep marionette lines I never had before. So now When I look in the mirror, an old, thin chipmunk storing nuts in its cheeks is looking back at me. It's really awful. My doctor blew me off when I came in to complain and had the nerve to tell me this was perfectly normal, and that I looked good!!! (No one is of the opinion that I look good. They try to tell me it's not that bad, but they are just trying to make me go feel less bad about it). I consulted with a very well regarded dermatologist in NYC who told me this is not at all "normal" and that radiesse was a bad Choice for a face as thin as mine. He said he rarely uses Radiesse at all because it cannot be reversed, and if someone does not like how they look, they are stuck with it for a long, long time. He was frank in telling me that there is really nothing that can be done but live with it until it metabolizes out of my body, upwards of a year, and that some lumpiness may persist. He was also honest enough to tell me that trying to correct it with fillers in different areas was not worth it, at best it would do little to help, at worst, It could make things worse. I appreciate his frankness and am glad that he didn't try to "sell" me a solution that wasn't going to help. I have been feeling so self conscious and embarrassed by my appearance, that I might have shelled out good money after bad if a doctor tried to convince some other filler or procedure would help. So I now know a good, reputable doctor, but I am so sorry I went down this path, that I will never try anything other than a facial again. I only hope this whole mess will become less noticible over time.
Why can't women's feel okay with growing older gracefully? Men don't do this to themselves! I'll take sags and wrinkles over looking damaged any time!