3 months post op -Chapter closed -- New pics!

Ah...After a nice long break from here, I'm back to update where I'm at in this process at 3 months out today.

In a short form - I feel like my old self minus the excess skin! I can finally sit here and say that I'm happy that I've went through this process. FINALLY! I was getting worried there for a bit.
My tummy is starting to feel completely back to normal. Firm. Tight. Solid. Healed even! I know that I still have some ways to go but I feel night and day from where I was at 8 weeks. It's amazing what time does for the body. I saw a GREAT difference from weeks 8-10 and it's stayed pretty consistent.

I did away with any compression LONG ago. I have done away with being completely paranoid over sodium and the swelling. I'm just back to LIVING and it's GREAT!

My workouts are back to full force which I'm loving. I have an occasional pull or tight feeling but no pain. Woohoo! There is nothing like throwing on a sports bra and some shorts..Looking in the mirror like HOT DAMN!

My definition is looking good. That is when I'm not so swollen. I still have swelling and some fluid that has not disappeared but it's been slow steady progress and it's such a drastic difference than where I was that it is leaving me much more patient now. I kind of know when I can expect a good swell session..Usually after the weekend when my diet has been a bit off or when I've done a lot of exercise concentrating on the stomach. It tends to puff up and there goes the definition.

My scar looks good. It is gradually fading, flat, and a thin line. I'm not concerned with it at all. It will do what it is going to do...

I saw my doctor last week at 12weeks post op. She took some updated photos and we compared the two sets. WOW! I was blown away. Everything including my posture is so different. My results are about 80-90% as she put them at this point. I will see a little more improvement as the swelling goes and stays away but not to expect anything too much more. It was nice to hear that actually.. It's allowed me to focus more on what I have for improvement vs what I am hoping, wishing, and wondering for in the improvement department. She said scar looks amazing. Expect it to drastically fade around 6 months. She also said that I will still continue to heal for 1 year but swelling should subside by 6 months.

So...there you have it! Life is good.

Just a short update.

I'm into my 7th week now. I'm seeing slow progress here each and everyday.

I'm still swelling but not quite to a basketball at this point more like a small cantelope. :)

I stuck with my workouts and glad I decided to keep going. Seems my body has adjusted to the shock of exercise and movement again. I swell just as much if I workout or not. I'll take it. So still swelling with minimal improvement but life is normal.

It does seem like it's one thing to worry about after another for me during this process. First it was pre-surgery fears, then recovery, then swelling craziness, and now my concerns have shifted to my definition coming back... Still not seeing much. I'm anxious to see final results. I also find myself obsessing about being tight enough or stretching back out. Damaging something... I'm telling ya. It's one thing after another.

My doc has reassured me last week that I wasn't going to damage anything muscle repair related by working out at this point..but after each workout.. I go home and rip off the flexeez to double check if my curves are still there. LOL Or, if I have bulges. I don't get why I'm doing this. I don't have really any discomfort or tightening. I feel pretty much the same as I did pre-op now except for a few burning sensations and little pinches of discomfort here and there. I have not had any "Oh [RS bleep]" pains at all. Need to stop stressing it!

Hope everyone is doing well!

Where to begin..

At one point in time, I used to pride myself on being a very easy going, positive, and upbeat type of person. I'm ashamed to say that this "process" has me really doing some soul searching these days with my mind..I feel anything but mentally strong these days. It's frustrating! I know that this is all temporary. I know that this too shall pass but I am eager for that day to come. I thought that I mentally prepared for this though I'm realizing now that I prepared for other parts of this surgery and not what I'm experiencing now. It's been a rough week.

Anyway-I did call my PS yesterday about the sudden SWELL and the all of a sudden discomfort again. She had me come in for a visit. Yikes. Well, it definitely didn't start out well. She came in the office as she typically does with a somewhat impatient and rude manner. She tends to do this and then warm up as the visits go on. I've become to expect it. However, yesterday I was way too emotional for that to take place. She basically had me open my robe and then stated "Oh yes. VERY swollen." yet it's all "Normal" and then proceeded to explain that I was "normal" in 5 different other ways to attempt to get it to sink in. I'm no idiot. Isn't everyone entitled to a bad day? Of course, I got on the defensive and she could sense it in my face..Asking me if there was something that I was worried or an underlying issue. She explained that she has seen my anxiety and it is typical with people that have lost a big amount of weight. They are afraid to "lose ground" or have a "set back" or even worse "get fat again"...By now, I'm in tears and she is comforting me somewhat with the reality that I have had a very "average" recovery and even though I want an "instant" recovery that it isn't going to happen. She said externally that I have healed absolutely wonderfully hence the reason my scar is fading. Internally, I'm healing average. It's very early on in the recovery period for all the trauma that took place but it will get back to normal. It will heal. I will recover. Then came the exercise discussion..Yes, I was seeing progress before because I had rested 4 straight weeks before exercising or really moving for that matter. Now I have put myself back a few weeks because my body once again is in shock and needs to adjust...but she also explained that my definition of exercise and 99.9% of other people's is completely different. She compared it to my mileage. Sure running 3 out of a normal 13 for me is nothing but after a surgery to this degree I shouldn't even be doing that. Huh? She did say that she is by no means telling me NOT to exercise but she does think that I started out way too hard, way too fast. No surprise there. That I also have to realize that by exercising I will deal with the reprocussions and right now that is a LOT more swelling than I was having..but this will be the case now or later. WTH?

I left the office pretty discouraged. I felt sad and beaten up a bit..but, always thankful for her honest opinion because it makes me stop and realize something new about myself. I'm a complete control freak! I don't do well with "eventually" and "letting it go".. It's not how I work. It's either black or white not gray. I am worried about losing ground. [RS bleep], I've worked hard to get where I'm at. It's who I am at this point in my life...I'm not willing to give that up. It also made me realize that the thinking "Will this be FOREVER?" has to stop.. I mean, seriously a little logic here Tara. It won't be FOREVER. It's definitely LONGER than you think but nothing lasts forever.

Anyway-I've had a rough week. I'm still in a rough stop. I'm going back and forth in my head about what to do with this exercise thing. I mean, do I just keep exercising and maybe cut back some..then gradually build back up again. Do I stop and put my feet up for another 4 weeks? Hope that this stops the swelling and fear that it will just start right back up..Or, do I just keep up with my regular routine and go for it. Brush off the swell and just deal with that it may take longer to heal but will happen.. I would love any input.