Much needed MM complete!

Hi ladies! I've been looking at your pics and reading your stories for the last year, at least. Well, I finally have the courage to share my pics and have scheduled my surgery for 1/27/16. I'm terrified! I have had many surgeries throughout my life, but for some reason (maybe it's becoming a mom and having someone else's well-being to think about other than my one) I'm scared to death of not coming out of this.
Short back story, I've been married for almost 10 year (this November!). I'm 43. I had my only son at 35. About a year after having my son, my body went crazy. I began gaining and losing 40+ pounds over and over again. My boobs grew huge (I had a BA about 10 yrs ago but the girls doubled in size). I started have pitting edema on my lower extremities. I became terribly depressed. I saw many doctors who all told me it was all in my head, I had post-partum depression, etc. I knew my body and something wasn't right. (I am a former ER nurse and was pissed when no one was listening to me!) I was pretty much written off as crazy. One day I started lactating. I thought, enough. I went to Cedars Sinai, saw a specialist and one visit and an MRI later, was diagnosed with a pituitary tumor. It's been a roller coaster since. But I've been stable for a couple years. My boobs never went back down and my belly is a disaster.
I am scheduled for a full TT, breast lift plus implant replacement (smaller and silicone), and some light lipo of flanks. I'm going back to the same PS who did my implants years ago. He did a great job the first time and I love his staff so I figured, why waste my time looking elsewhere.
Anyway, here's my body in it's sad current condition. I have had numerous abdominal surgeries starting at age 12, including exploratory laparoscopies, open laparotomies, and one c/s; hence the disfigured way my belly hangs due to incisions. I used to have a perfectly flat tummy, never did ab work. Those days are long gone, but hopefully not for long!

I wanted to push this surgery out as far as possible but at the same time I want it done as soon as possible. Work is pulling me in a direction to have it done sooner rather than later. I've been trying to lose weight, keeping a food journal, exercising daily, but my body is fighting against me every day. It just doesn't want to drop weight. So, I'm going to move forward with surgery and accept whatever comes with it. Hopefully with my midsection returning to something more normal for me, the rest of my body will follow. With years of hormonal issues plaguing my weight, I may have to accept that I have a new normal. I may never get back to my weight pre-pregnancy, but I will make the best of what I have now. I will look better after surgery than I do now, and I could use a good dose of confidence moving into the new year. You ladies inspire me every day and I sincerely thank you for sharing your journeys. I've given up on miracles but I'm happy with vast improvement. :-)

I've been super strict on my eating and exercising. I have exactly a 7 pound loss to show for it. Not very impressive but age and hormone issues are no joke. The struggle is real! My goal is to lose at least another 10 before surgery on 1/15. Not going to be easy with so many holiday parties, lunches, and dinners this month. Ugh! But I can do it!!!