Dumbest Thing I've Ever Done

I am 29 years old, and had upper and lower...

I am 29 years old, and had upper and lower blepharoplasty 13 days ago. I had bags under my eyes that run in my family. They were not fat, they were muscle.

My Dr. removed a small amount of skin from under my eyes in an attempt to make the bags less visible. He suggested I do my uppers at the same time. I do not have any issues with the uppers. Although, I am so focused on my new scars below my eyes and my eye size difference that I can't even begin to think about the uppers. My left eye now appears much larger than my right. It is not only my eyelid that is larger, but my actual eye opening. I have scars below my eye lashes that at this point, are impossible to cover with makeup.

I am so ashamed of myself for doing this. My issues with my eyes were nothing compared to what I am facing now. I can't imagine ever going in public again. It was very painful. I still have swelling, and mild bruising. However, after crying in my Dr.'s office yesterday, I am all but certain the size difference of my eyes will not change.

I would give ANYTHING to take it all back, and be right back where I was. I go back to work on March 30th, and at this point I am considering quitting all together. I cannot even imagine facing anyone after what i've done to myself. Before this I went to the gym five days a week, and loved to work out, and now I can't imagine stepping one foot in the door. I know it has not been long enough to know what my final result will be, but I do know that I will definitely have visible scars, and I am sure my eyes will remain two different sizes. Those things alone are enough to keep me hiding in my house.

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