Mom of 2, Age 41, Absorbica (Accutane) Improved My Quality of Life - Danbury, CT

I'm 45 and I've been on Accutane/Absorbica 5 times in my life. Every time I was on it, it was like a a huge stress was relieved from my life. The tests and blood work and appts took less time out of my life, because I had minimal things to cover up. My hair never oily. I was on 120mg too, I weigh a bit more but side effects minimal. Eventually it had to end and now, 8 months after last dose, I'm back to cystic acne flare ups. There are days I won't leave the house, or go to work! It's so depressing to have these legions on your face (and I already have depression) especially atmy age! I don't exercise because I don't want to cover it with makeup, and sweat. Plus the sweat stings my face and irritates it more. It's embarrassing I have called out sick to work, and don't want to embarrass my kids. Recently the Dermatologist said... you have roseacea, try this cream (5 ingredients). I thought this was crazy but I was wrong. The cream he gave me was acne roseacea gel with ingredients used to kill parasites such as demodex (a whole new thing to research) and the gel worked! But, the supplier increased the cost and they don't sell it anymore. So I have a few of the ingredients separately but nothing like that gel. It actually helped me, the only thing aside from Accutane.

Since I've joined the group, I've had little time to read posts and post my own journey but finally took time to write it. I am a 42 yr old mom of 2 children. I have depression (for years), some anxiety, PCOS, hive/itch issues, have suffered with acne since the age of 15, and cystic acne since my mid-20's. I have been on and tried every "cure" out there (toothpaste, blue light, zeno, professional dermabrasion, personal dermabrasion machine, spironolactone, the pill, every "cycline" doxi, mino, tetracycline, epiduo, differin, so many cortisone shots I lost count, soooo many more both natural and prescription & too many to list!). At 25, I took my first course of Accutane. It definitely helped (not cured) but my acne came back within a few years. At 28 I was on Accutane again, same results. I got married, kids, but the acne continued through the years, getting worse as time went on. I've experienced the frustration with trying to cover my face with make up to go to work. I've called in sick to work because of how bad my face was. I wouldn't like outdoor activities because my skin was so bad I was embarrassed. I would always avoid face to face conversations if I could and at work I would always feel "less" than others and self conscious in social gatherings, lunches, and meetings. I wouldn't take walks outside with co workers because my make-up woukd "melt" and expose all my red marks. I was incredibly incredibly thankful for the 12 years I was able to work from home and visit the office 1 day a week. Not only did that save me commuting time, it saved me countless hours in covering my face, peeling dried dead skin flakes to prep for make-up, and blotting my face all day to remove oil.

After losing my job after 18 years at same company, and the start of interviewing, it became increasingly embarrassing to interview with bad skin. I have always struggled with self esteem but there were many times I had ZERO self esteem, which makes me terrible at interviewing. My cystic acne has effected my life in so many ways, most people will never truly understand. Passing on invites and activities because of "my face is too bad". At this time in my life I don't have a minute to myself, so the thought of stating Accutane (blood work and pregnant tests) was just a waste of time that I didn't have to spare.

Finally in February 2015, I just reached a breaking point and said I need to do this. My face was showing so many signs of scarring and just kept getting worse. I booked an appt (1 month wait), then had to have a blood test (wait a month for neg test), then finally started Absorbica (Accutane / Isotretinoin). Well as much as its a pain in the ass and time consuming (bloodwork and monthly visits and screw ups by derm office not calling it in, pharmacy not filling it, the time window expires and I have to repeat bloodwork within 2 weeks because of their errors) I am here to finally say IT IS WORTH IT. All that time spent each month is actually SAVING me time in covering my face in makeup, picking at my face (nothing to pick at) and I go everywhere without a second thought of who will I see because of my face. I hardly wear makeup, just dot on concealer and go! i am on 120 mg/day for my weight. 80 mg in morning, 40 at night. My face has dramatically improved. I also keep a skin journal with pictures months before taking Absorbica and now. Big difference in clarity and noticeable improvement. I still do have cysts that are troublesome and continue to get cortisone shots as needed monthly. Absorbica has not shrunk my problem cysts that continue to fill with crap or oil. but I have not experienced increased depression, in fact my depression has improved!!!

The only downside for me was the joint aches I have that seem to be getting worse. I am on my 6 month and I feel like I'm 100 when I get up from sitting. Once I'm moving I'm fine. And lastly, I've still had a couple of MAJOR cyst flare ups. I mean A MAJOR ONE like raised like a ping pong ball and so so deep. The same cyst has been problematic since Christmas 2014. It's been injected at least 7 times. Sometimes 2x in same week because it was so bad. I will attach a photo if it lets me. But overall my Absorbica Accutane treatment has been a positive experience so far!! I also just heard about laser acne treatment I'm going to look into that soon too.