Just About Chickened out Right Before my Surgery, but Went for It in the End - Chicago, IL
- updated 1 month ago
So yesterday, Dec. 3rd was surgery date. I was...
- 4 Dec 2012
So yesterday, Dec. 3rd was surgery date. I was sick to my stomach scared all day before surgery and my surgery wasn't scheduled until 3 pm that day so that day was hell too. I was contemplating going through with it or not. All I could think about were all the risks, and how they didn't seem to be worth the chance of a great outcome. I knew this surgery could lead me down a very happy road or a very deep depression and embarrassment depending on the results. But then again, if I didn't do it I would always wonder, and probably end up getting it eventually anyway. Also, I couldn't stand the thought of just accepting my nose forever if I hadn't gone through with it. I don't know if all my second guesses and negativity stemmed from my parents or what. They were not excited about my decision, and made sure I knew EVERY possible scary outcome that could occur. They were so worried for me and didn't want me to be making a mistake, I suppose. Also, it didn't help that I got quite a few text messages the day before surgery saying, "You are a beautiful young lady." Or, "you have a beautiful face and everything fits nicely." Those comments just make it harder for some reason. In the end I just hope they don't think I was more beautiful before surgery, that would really hurt my feelings after going through all of this.
Anyway, I did have the surgery, but was contemplating the decision still just before they put the IV's in me. The doctor was able to calm me down, by talking to me about what he wanted to fix and he was displaying confidence and kindness in which I didn't know if I saw in him before. The nurses were also very reassuring that I would be fine and that they do this about 10-12 times/week in this particular surgery center. I just kept thinking, well thats a lot easier said than done, and they have NO idea whether or not I will be fine 2 months ago. Anyway, I was thinking like Negative Nancy. I only thought about the worst case scenarios. Some how, some way I went through with it.
Right now, 7 hours after surgery, I am super glad I did go through with it. I have no idea what my final outcome will be and whether or not I will be so happy or regretful of this decision, but for now I am happy I went with it. One step at a time, right?
As of right now, I can already breathe much better through my nose than I ever could before! I am not experiencing intense pain except for a half hour after surgery, and there isn't any bruising so far. I am dripping onto my "mustache bandage," but not excessively. If recovery can stay like this I will be a very happy camper. The only thing is that my hands and feet are tingling really bad now preventing me from sleeping; a possible side effect from the general anesthesia. I will probably post some pictures tomorrow, and will continue to keep everyone updated.
Okay So today is my third day post-op. The last...
- 6 Dec 2012
Today, I have felt 100x better than I have in the past two days, so this is good. For the first time I feel like I actually could be happy with the results. I also, have less fear about facing others as of now. I am not the type to get plastic surgery and be so vain, so this whole process has really taken a toll on me and has got me worried about my priorities. Sorry for being so depressing, but this is how I feel and someone else may feel the same after their surgery. Anyway, I am trying to stay positive since I can't tell the results yet. I hope I LOVE it. Yesterday was so nice, my boyfriend and I took our dog on a walk around 9 at night and the cold air felt really good on my face. We also put up a few Christmas lights and garland along our balcony.
I no longer have to wear the "mustache bandage" since I am not bleeding or dripping anything from my nose. My swelling has peaked and is starting to go down quickly. I did not have any bruising, yet anyway. I have not experienced a sore throat like others on here. The swelling can really make you look pretty unattractive, so I can't wait until it fully subsides.
Okay, so it is day 4 post op. I still never got...
- 7 Dec 2012
Anyway, this whole process has been truly taxing and depressing. Everyday I wish I had not gone through with the surgery. I feel embarrassed and weak. I wish I could take it all back. I have not seen the results yet; I get the cast off Tuesday. Maybe in 2 months I may be SO happy and actually glad I did it. I just want to feel normal, quite hiding out, and go on with my life. I guess I am being incredibly impatient, since it is only 4 days since surgery. I just think this whole recovery process is hell. You can't really go anywhere, you look scary, I keep feeling like my nose will collapse or thinking of horror stories. I can't freakin smile. I had a mild allergic reaction to the antibiotic, Clindamycin I was taking(allergic to penicillin as well). I also am concerned the doc went TOO SMALL and that concerns me because I still want to look like me! I should have told him to be conservative with it, but I never did say that. Also, I get anxiety every time I think about facing people who know that I got this as well as friends and family who don't know. I fear people are going to look at me and gasp while putting both hands up to their face saying your nose! I don't think ppl would, but this is what I think about when seeing everyone for the first time. You thought your focus was your nose before, well not like it is now!
I have to try to stay positive, and I mean try REALLY hard. My boyfriend and my cousin give me the best support. They are both so positive about this and try their best to keep my head up. The best thing to do when you start questioning whether you made the right decision or not is to keep your mind off of it. Go walk the dog or play cards or something. Last night was the first night I didn't wake up in a frantic and start stressing out about the crazy decision I made to fix my nose.
Believe it or not, this still could be the best decision I made. I guess I am just so fearful and stressed out of the unknown. Just make sure to consider all of this b4 you go into surgery.
About my Doc, I will rate him once I know the outcome. Surgery took longer than expected so I changed the price. Also, I'll post another pic today after I wash my hair.
Okay before I scare everyone out of getting a nose...
- 8 Dec 2012
I feel ALOT better. Like I said yesterday after I wrote my post I took a bath and washed my hair. I blow dried and straightened my hair. I cleaned the house. I painted my nails and put jewels on them. I took the dog for a walk. I cleaned out the fridge. I made dinner. I feel like me again. However, all that activity was probably not the greatest for recovery since my nose felt quite swollen last night before bed, but I think it was worth it! Anyway, today I am going to take it easy some. I am over this indecisiveness whether or not I made a bad or good decision because you know what, I ALREADY MADE THE DECISION AND THERE IS NO GOING BACK, so why beat myself up over it any longer!! As it heals, I really don't think many people will even notice.
Okay I need to complain a little still.....
My tip is super wide and big! I hope it goes down 2x its size! I am 5 days post-op so I should assume it will. The doc did take fat from my stomach and put it in my nose since my skin was super thin. That scares me that he made my nose too fat! I don't know if this is possible but has anyone had experience with fat (or cartilage, maybe its similar) relocated into their nose?!?!
Day 6 POST-OP FEELING GOOD!!! Today I cleaned,...
- 9 Dec 2012
FEELING GOOD!!! Today I cleaned, cleaned, cleaned the house. I finally feel like this whole rhinoplasty was a GOOD thing. I think I am going to really like my results. I cannot wait until Tuesday to get this dang thing off my nose, yayyayayay! I am not so scared of what I may see anymore; I just want it off. My face still has minor swelling in the cheeks, and my skin is oily and tight. My upper lip is still pretty stiff, but slightly improving. The upper lip stiffness makes you have a flat affect, which adds to the unattractiveness of the whole process, lol. Anyway, I can't wait for Tuesday and I pray for a great outcome after this mini-journey. Thanks all for the support, I have been reading so many stories on here ever since I scheduled my rhinoplasty. Peace.
Cast Off Today Holy Huge-ness!! I did not expect...
- 11 Dec 2012
Holy Huge-ness!! I did not expect to see such a huge and swollen nose under that cast. I was shocked. So as of right now I am hoping that I have some major swelling going on, and that it will dissipate and shrink this large blob on my face sooner than later. Yikes. Time will only tell. I am standing up in my best friend's wedding in exactly a month from today, so I can only hope my nose de-swells quickly and that my smile can come back in time(I still have yet to tell her I got rhinoplasty). I mean my profile doesn't even look small! Did anyone ever have massive swelling in the bridge that ended up going down making your profile better?? Getting a little nervous all over again. I will post pics within the next few days.
Day 10 post-op Still looks big. Still waiting...
- 13 Dec 2012
Still looks big. Still waiting for some de-welling and shrinkage. I have a party to go to Saturday night and my boyfriend's fathers Bday party Sunday, so hopefully by then. Yesterday, my brother told me it looks bigger than b4. I posted pics of cast removal day.
12 Days Post Op/4 days Post Cast Removal! Still...
- 15 Dec 2012
Still big, but better. My nose has no definition; it's like a blob right now. However, each day does seem to bring out the slightest changes. From the front my nose is wider than ever and that is what makes me most insecure at this moment. The profile is better than pre-surgery, but was looking for it to be a bit smaller and softer. Maybe time is on my side, and my nose will form to my imagination. As of now, I think I was more confident with my old nose, but I am still less than 2 wks post op. I posted 2 new pics.
3 Days shy of 1 month post op... So, I think my...
- 28 Dec 2012
So, I think my nose is still swollen. It has improved ever so slightly since my last review. I truly hope my nose is still swollen, because it is still very wide compared to pre-op from a frontal view. The profile is better, but my nose just looks undefined and swollen from all angles. The tip is the worst; it is a huge ball that still projects out. He did put some fat in my nose due to my very thin skin, so I hope I am seeing swelling and he did not give me a fat nose. I would be pissed! I hope my nose defines itself soon. I contour my nose with makeup to make it look more narrow from the front. I see the doc Jan 10th, a day b4 my best friend's wedding. Hopefully, he can assure me that it is swollen and this is not even close to the final result. I def. am going to bring up the fat nose issue, and whether it is due to swelling or actually fat! I drank a few nights around 2 weeks post op and the following days my nose swelled up so bad, so maybe I impeded the healing process some. I am not drinking for a long time; I am doing whatever it takes to get this nose to where it should be so I can have my confidence back. DON'T DRINK, learn from my mistake.
I went to a couple Christmas family parties and no one even noticed anything different. No one said a thing and when I eventually told everyone they said they couldn't even tell. Even my closest friends, seeing them for the first time, had no idea at all. I guess this reaction is better than looking totally different. Like my doc said, really it is just millimeters of a difference. My doc said at cast removal date, that in a month I should love the nose, so that will be in a week from now. I sure hope so.
I have a question for anyone, should I still be trying to sleep upright at 1 month post op? Also, anyone have any other tips for a speedy recovery? I added new photos.
Hey guys, its been a while. I am 2 months post op....
- 4 Feb 2013
2 months post op....I just posted like 6 more...
- 4 Feb 2013
My nose is so lumpy, blob-like, and fat. No...
- 19 Feb 2013
3 Months Post-Op.... I went to my follow-up w/ Dr...
- 6 Mar 2013
I went to my follow-up w/ Dr. Shah at 3 months post op, and he came in the room and said my nose was swollen. Then he gave me 3 little tiny shots of steroids(barely hurt) in my supratip, and told me to tape for a week, and come back in a month. Then he vanished. The steroid shot made my nose swell up just slightly the first day. The following days it definitely has decreased in swelling, thankfully!! The steroids turned my hard swelling into soft, squishy swelling. The shot caused my nose to thin out some and the tip to reduce in size!! I have heard from some docs, on this site, that steroid injections only cause temporary effects; I pray this is not true for me. This is the best my nose has looked; it's been 5 days since the injection. Hopefully in a month he will give me another. Finally, I am seeing a normal nose! However, don't get me wrong, my nose is still not yet ideal or fully "de-swelled." It still lacks definition and looks terrible in pictures. The shot stopped my fluctuations in swelling so far, so I drank coffee and had a few beers at the Bulls game and my nose was fine, woo hoo!!! Also, I finally feel acceptable going out in public. Thank you steroids!!
I still have a visible and palpable bump on my nose that concerns me. I didn't get the chance to ask Dr. Shah about this, but I will during my next follow-up. I hope eventually I can get it rasped down with an in-office procedure. Has anyone had experience with rasping?? Did it help, cost you, how many months post op are you allowed to get this, and did you swell up a lot?
About 6 months post op
- 23 May 2013
- 10 Aug 2013
11 Months Post Op
- 4 Nov 2013
Anyway, I am so happy I was courageous enough to go through with this surgery, it took away all my insecurities about my nose. I went from hating my nose to loving it, which is insane. I never worry about who is looking at my profile, or I never want to curl up into a ball when people start referring to their noses or big noses or witches or whatever else (that i forget now, since I dont care anymore!) This is a surgery totally different from liposuction or a breast enhancement. This is not something we can fix with exercise or a padded bra. Plus, its in the middle of our faces- how awful, that our biggest insecurities are central to what everyone looks at. Also, noses look worse with age, so that scared me into getting the surgery- the fact that my nose could look bigger and worse, woah- I was not about to let that happen! I am so happy I went through with the surgery. We are a courageous bunch!
Dr. Anil Shah in WaterTower place downtown Chicago. Highly recommended! I could not imagine going to any other doc.