Worst Experience of my Life...permanently Numb and Disfigured.

I had my breast reduction 4 years ago. I did a lot of research and asking around before I committed to do it. The doctor I chose gave me a thorough consultation and promised I would be able to breastfeed should I have a baby, and he said I would be a C cup, and I had nothing to worry about, and he actually said "If you're not happy with the results, then I didn't do a good job." I do not smoke, am not diabetic, and am not elderly. I had a complete physical and a mammogram before surgery. Everything was A-OK, no concerns from my regular doctor or the surgeon. Also, his estimate for what he would remove was 500 from the left, 300 from the right. Well, he removed almost 1200 from the left, and almost 800 from the right. During my first dressing change, I could see my areolas turning purple. He said there was nothing to worry about. He kept saying that, and saying things would turn out looking just fine even while my areolar tissue turned BLACK and hard, and the surrounding tissue began disintegrating, and letting the stitches loose. He said the areola would maybe be a little different color, but it'd be fine. He said everything was fine when he then had to remove 3/4 of the right areola and lots of tissue underneath. He said the hole would close right up and I'd be surprised how good it would look. Several months later, it finally did close up, but my breast is flat, very small, concave, and disfigured. Pieces of the left areola also died, but scarred over without the huge hole like I had on the right, which I had to pack with gauze for weeks on end. He promised me a C cup, and I told him many times before surgery that I wanted to be in proportion and still have a full shape. Now I can't find bras to fit..nothing that fits around my back has cups small enough. I can only wear soft sport bras. I can't find shirts to fit, because they hang and gap in the chest. Probably the most heart-breaking thing is that I'm totally, completely numb. I can't feel the skin on my breasts or NACs at all. But INSIDE the breasts, they are very painful. My last mammogram was excruciating. The surgeon offered me no revisions, no reconstruction, not even tattooing. My insurance company will not pay for anything, because I don't have a diagnosis of cancer. When I went to another plastic surgeon for a second opinion about what could be done, the first thing the nurse said was "oh, when did you have cancer?" I'm disfigured for life, and will never have feeling in my breasts again. I can never breast feed, even though I was promised I could. My boyfriend left me after I was left disfigured. The surgeon simply told me "You just need to learn to rise above your breasts." If he'd only said that during my consultation, I'd have known what to do. RUN. He actually said to me "Disfigurement is all relative, anyway. If you lived in Africa you'd probably have big plates in your earlobes." In my chart at my last visit, he noted "Patient rejects results. Results should be fairly acceptable." This has destroyed my self esteem. I feel like a freak. And being disfigured and totally numb makes me too self-conscious to even think about finding a boyfriend. Just think if you came home from the dentist and the novacaine NEVER wore off. You wouldn't feel much like kissing anybody, ever again. I can't find any other women to whom this has happened. Everybody always told me, you'll be so happy, it's the best thing you'll ever do for yourself, etc. Well I am devastated. It's worse than anything I could have imagined happening. Everything that happened to me was rare...but for it ALL to happen was unbelievable.