Considering Removal - Boston, MA

Unhappy to have implants and they scare me but im...

Unhappy to have implants and they scare me but im scared of what I will look like. I hope I wont be deformed I just dont know what to do!!

Ok so its been a while but I realized I never...

Ok so its been a while but I realized I never filled anyone in on more specifics. I am now 25 and got the implants when I was 24 last October 2011. I was a small 34b prior implants but my breasts were a little asymmetrical. It didn't really bother me until I became obsessed with breasts and two surgeons pointed it out to me. Also, they said NY breasts were constructed meaning the distance from the crease to the nipple was short. said it was a deformity...way to make me feel good! I was competing in figure competitions and saw so many nice, round big breasts, I felt terrible about my small, asymmetrical,'deformed' pointy triangular breasts. I had the money and could train my body to look great, the only thing I had to fix was my boobs! many people told me that it wasn't any different from getting your hair dyed and that if it makes you happy I should go for it. So I did it aside from feeling it wasn't right, I convinced myself nothing was wrong with it, even though I felt there was something wrong to.changing what was given to you.

Within the week, I knew I hated them. I became chronically depressed, lost 10 pounds, had major anxiety and refused to go to the gym where people would gawk at my breasts. I cover them.img constantly. They look beautiful naked but won't even let my bf see them I am mad this artificial thing is not me and people are attracted to.it. I so badly want self acceptance.but am scared I can't have it. My boyfriend was not supportive if me removing and wanted to make sure.I knew what I could look like if I removed. He saw how depressed I was getting them in, how badly I wanted to change my breasts to begin with, and now wants to make sure I an fully aware of this decision, all the negative, and does not understand why I want them out to potentially look worse than before when I didn't like my own to begin with. He's nervous I will get depressed again. I am worried too of all his points he made and that's what is preventing me from removing. I don't want to be unattractive! I am.worried too I will be smaller than before as some women are, or more asymmetrical. My surgeon had to add far to my breasts to help with the constriction which I don't agree with it felt hopeless. My breasts lost most all the far and now one looks bigger than the other when I bend over.

I'msick.of surgery. I don't want that feeling of 'needing' surgery. I do. Want a lift,I don't want far transfers, I just want to.be happy with however I look. I got 400Ccs silicone dual plan transax. No kids yet. Ugh.

So, over the past couple Weeks I believe I have...

So, over the past couple Weeks I believe I have changed my mind. My boyfriend brought up concerns to me that I was kind of ignoring prior because I just wanted these things out but wasn't really thinking the aftermath through. I think I have found middle ground until I am mentally ready to remove these. I think I am going to downsize dramatically to about 175ccs and switch to saline. Anyone else consider this? I'm mostly sure this is the right choice for me.

Hi Ladies. So I made the final decision. I am...

Hi Ladies. So I made the final decision. I am downsizing. I will go from 400 moderate plus silicone to somewhere between 195-225 cc saline low profile. I put so much thought and effort into this decision. Although I am not happy that I am going to keep implants in my body, for me, it's the only thing I can do right now to get me to a comfortable place. I will eventually fully remove, but I have been wanting to remove since day after my implants, and I haven't got the guts to do it which tells me that if the outcome was not favorable, it would e very hard for me to accept, and I am worried I would want to reimplant. I am hopeful this downsize will give me the strength to really do it eventually. At least its some middle ground. Also, I am switching to saline. I feel safer with saline. I am a constant worry wart with silicone, I just want to get my mind to a relaxing place. I know that this decision is right for me. I truly applaud any woman who can follow through with explant and would never recommend implants to anyone. It has been a lesson for me and unfortunately, it has some permanent reminders. I will remove one day, hopefully in a few years, when I am ready. But until then, this downsize will get me some peace. Best of luck!
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