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Depression over rumors spreading after Lipo

By morena on 21 Jun 2009
Depression over rumors spreading after Lipo

Like many women ive always had issues with my body parts. My first issue was my hips- they protrude and are uneven but eventually I grew used to them. It's nearly 10 years later and I decided to have abdominal Lipo after a botched myomectomy, and I already feel self-conscious about doing it.

But today my boyfriend said my estranged brother told him I also had Lipo on my hips. I just discovered he's been saying this around town for years. Now I feel very raw and exposed about my hips. My self-esteem is at zero. What should I do?

Comments (7)

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Sharon at RealSelf (Community Manager - 4,028 posts) 25 Jun 2009

Hi Morena,

I'm so sorry to hear what people are putting you through. :(

This is just my opinion, but I think you should probably consider the source. You said you are estranged from your brother, so it sounds like he is out to a.) get attention and/or b.) hurt you.

I know it is easy for *us* to say "don't let him get you down" but IMHO that is the best way forward. Your body is your business; whether or not you had lipo is no one's business. Deny it if you wish, or tell them it's none of their business. From the looks of your photo, I think many women would kill to be as in shape as you are anyway.

I don't know if this gives you any solace, but please know you're not alone in this. Rant away if you need to; we won't judge you here!

Best of luck to you,
--Sharon

morena (46 posts) 5 Jul 2009
thanx sharon, u no, now he feels sorry but i think its becoz i finally busted him on it, but i have since talked to friends and boyfriends that have fizzled out from the past as well as current friends, and sure enough they all said something to the effect of "yes ur brother did mention that u had surgery, he sed it was on ur uneven hips along with telling a lot of other embarrassing stuff but i didnt pay attention". i wonder if there are any other people out there that were exploited because they had or were accused of having surgery. thanks to my brother, i feel uncomfortable telling anybody about my abdominal surgery, and i was really looking forward to sharing my story with other women to help them...
mamamean (4 posts) 6 Mar 2010
obviously your over 18 so you have to be about 28 or older. i think your a big girl and if you felt you didnt want anyone to know about it then you shouldnt have told anyone period. the only person that knows about my [future] procedures is my mom and thats only because the doc said i MUST travel with someone. it kills me that i cant tell my best friends about my experience in fear of them telling one of their good friends and so on, but hey i wont. but on the other hand liposuction is nothing to be ashamed about i think no surgery except butt implants, penis implants etc, is anything to be ashamed of lol then you would really need to do these procedures on a low
6712anon (1 post) 16 Apr 2010
"Those who care don't matter, and those who matter don't care." I have just had neck lipo for a double chin I have hated since I was a teen. No matter how fit and thin I was, it was always there, and being an active person it distressed me that it made me appear lazy and unfit. I live in a city that prides itself on it's natural and healthy lifestyles. I was afraid that most people would shun me for my decision, blaming shallowness and vanity. But really I wanted to be able to look at photos and see myself with my wonderful friends and family, instead of seeing only my double chin. I told two people - my good friend and my boyfriend. My good friend, who is a very natural "hippie" type, confided that she had had her breasts done a long time ago. When I told her my fears of social outcasting, she wisely said "Those who care don't matter, and those who matter don't care." So true. I am not 100% healed so I do not know how obvious it will be to my friends and acquaintances that I had anything done, but I know that those who figure it out will fall into one of those 2 above categories. And that is OK!
SweetVirginia (2 posts) 12 Aug 2010
I posted in my Facebook (which have over 450 People) And so far, People have been Very supportive towards my procedures. I figure, if I show them that I don't care that they know, neither should they. Is my body, it is my money and I can do with both as I please. Keep on smiling!
S in PA (22 posts) 17 Jan 2011
Hi Morena, it's 6 months since your post, hope you are better. I had to tell my friend (because I had to ask her to drive me to & from) and of course had to tell my boyfriend (who then told just about everyone he knows!) He's more than 100lbs bigger than me, but has been "stocky" all his life and I'm average 5'5" and 135 lbs, but decided to have lipo for the problem areas etc. The well meaning friends and family who found out about it mocked my decision and told me I'm crazy etc because they hadn't seen my problem areas and didn't understand... (I hide it well with baggy clothes etc.) I felt I had to explain myself to them that in the last 35 years or so, I've been hiding my issues and been unhappy with my body etc. Now I realize that it's no one's business and shouldn't matter to anyone but me, it's my body! (I'm about 5 weeks post op on SmartLipo on abdomen/back.) In 2 weeks getting thighs/arms done too. My self-esteem is recovering at this point! The people who care about you will support you and not critize, anyone else can go take a hike in MHO. Good luck!
Sacramento6138 (12 posts) 31 May 2011
The hell with all those people. Never worry about what someone else has to say when its nothing but negative words. The hell with them girlfriend!!!

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