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Updating with progress photos

I really wish I had a before photo before the surgery, but like I said I couldn't really look at myself naked before so I'm not surprised I refused to take one of myself.

When I get the photos from the doctor in a few months, that's when it'll hit me.

Ok so I'll start at the beginning! Other people's...

Ok so I'll start at the beginning! Other people's stories have helped me so hopefully mine will help them!

PHOTOS FROM BEFORE AND FROM TONIGHT - 13 days Post

for as long I can remember, I would ask my mom when my boobs would grow. She would say things like, with time! Or "Tyra's didn't grow till she was 18!" Well I was past that and they were still exactly the same size as they were when I was 11 years old.

I would look in the mirror and look away. Any time my small frame would get an ounce of body fat, it would look like that much more fat or bloat.. Because my stomach would stick out significantly more than my boobs. I was ashamed and felt like the farthest thing from womanly. Sexy was a word that was completely unheard of.

Never did I dream I would actually come to the decision to do this. Over a night of wine and Oreos, my girlfriends and I were watching some Nicholas Sparks movie of course and talking about everything. Somehow we ended up joking about how I should get a boob job. Hearing their support spoke volumes for me and since my boyfriend is overseas I thought... I should do it while he's gone!

So here I am. nearly 2 weeks Post-Op! So far I've been NOTHING but happy. Just itching to get to the gym. That is until yesterday. Thankfully I've been trolling these forums for weeks so I expected booby-greed to come and sadness. I'm waiting on sadness.

This morning I felt the first bit of booby greed. Now I'm very small framed. I wanted to be able to wear clothes and people to not be able to tell on the outside that I had gotten a breast augmentation but I wanted to not be ashamed of what I saw in the mirror. We decided on 275s for that reason but while in surgery my PS and the girls around her made the decision to do 300s. IM SO THANKFUL! Only now that I've been used to having larger breasts... Now that the swelling is subsiding, I'm getting sad! I'm waiting for the booby greed and wishing to go away. With time!

My recovery has been easy. Day 1-5 I probably did nothing other than sit on my corner of the couch and stay ahead of the pain killers. Day 7 I cut off of them completely and tried to drive. Steering. Oh my lanta, steering! Even with power steering it was hard. It was around day 9 that driving was easier. But in the evenings at bed time, no position was comfortable. I couldn't sleep. Shooting pains in my left incision to the point where I was stuck in bed for two hours in agony before I finally got up to take a Percocet which only made me wired (never happened before, that was strange) and I didn't fall asleep until 8am. Day 10 was my second post-op checkup and I was instructed to start doing a massage to help them drop since they were still riding a little high. 3 times a day she said. I'll try, I said. Morning and night it's happening. A third time if I remember. The next few days, I went to sleep with the same shooting pain. I found not wearing a bra made it easier. Things have all been the same. Last night (day 13) was my first day of being able to wear a sports bra to bed again. Now my preference is braless but if a bra is requested, I'll try my hardest. The shooting pains are dying down at night now. It's at least bearable. I'm told it's the nerve endings regenerating or something.

Also just over the last two days I've been SO nervous about capsular contracture. I'm only at day 13/14 but my right breast is just firmer. I think it's normal but I'm just getting paranoid over every little detail right now. Rippling. I'm also afraid of rippling. Not until the last two days has any of this dawned on me.

I'm also now getting worried I'm going to have stretch marks. UGH when will my mind rest. :)

Really though, I'm happy. I wasn't expecting a self-confidence boost which I'm glad. I don't think this would have given me it. I already am self-confident with who I am.. I just wanted to feel like a woman. I felt like I missed out on that.

Goodbye itty-bitties!