Puffy, swollen, sunken eyes from botox with eye bags - horrific disfigurement. Likely permanent. - West Bloomfield, MI

week 37 - I feel like I am reaching a breaking point. I have no hope left. I know I am going to be disfigured forever. I continue to get worse. I am DESPERATE for the surgery that doctors say that I need... but cannot have it due to the changes in swelling. I cannot put into words how ugly I look or how much pain I suffer through every minute. It hurts just ot live and I feel like I should just be euthanized. I have NO quality of life and NO will to live. NONE. I live in HELL. Every single day for 255 - TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY FIVE DAYS - I have suffered with NO relief. I can do NOTHING for my daughter as a mother because I am in constant pain and half blind. Please, please God help me. I cannot go on much longer.

 

8 months - Still looking hideous. My entire face is now drooping. I am truly heartbroken and wish for death daily. I look more than ugly and hideous. The only thing that keeps me from ending it all is my poor daughter who has suffered immensely as she lost her once happy, fun, young Mommy. I died the day botox was injected. Died. I have ZERO quality of life and literallly drag through my days anxiously awaiting being able to go to sleep. I wish I could show my face to the world so they could see how horrific the disfigurement botox caused me truly is. I wish I could post videos on here. I can say honestly that at nearly 35 weeks, I look worse than I did at month 1. I have accepted that the damage is permanent and I will never look normal or like myself ever again. I don't know how I will continue living this way.

7 month update (29 weeks, 2 days) - still no positive change, yet there are changes. Month 7 has been by far the worse yet. My eyes are still very swollen and puffy, especiallyin the morning. I still have huge bags and tear trough deformity. My left side of my face still has some cheek ptosis. My eyebrows are still uneven and caving inward creating hideous 11 lines I did NOT have before. I have all my old wrinkles back, plus 100 new ones. My skin is VERY saggy and loose on my outer corners of my eyes. It literally hangs like mudflaps. My forehead skin feels loose as well. This has not been a good month, but lucky for me we have had blizzard like weather for weeks and I have been able to use the weather as an excuse to stay home. The worse change is the HUGE bulky muscles under my eyebrows (they were recruited to lift my dead, paralyzed botox muscles) and they look horrifying. I look like a neanderthal - that is no joke. It's really bad and make my eyes look sunken deep, deep, deep into my skull. My eyes are now 2 different sizes. My right side and left are so dramatically different that I look like 2-face. I miss my life and my face so much :(. I will update again in 2.5 weeks (that will be the 8 month mark).