'Accidental Facelift' - 57 Yr Old Female, Worst Mistake of my Life? - Swansea, GB

Please excuse the preamble, but this is how I got here, 8 days post facelift, and still wondering how and why it happened, and whether I have made the biggest mistake of my life.....
5 years ago I developed Hyperthyroidism. Despite being referred to an endocrinologist, I was not prescribed medication to control my thyroid condition, and within 6 months was referred to an ophthalmologist as I developed Graves Ophthalmopathy, which proved extremely difficult to get under control. During a 'routine' outpatients appointment my ophthalmologist told me my sight had deteriorated dramatically and the pressure on my optic nerves presented a very real danger of blindness. I was admitted immediately, had 3 days of intravenous steroids to try to reduce the inflammation and take the pressure of the optic nerve. Over the following 2 years, I had 6 weeks of radiotherapy, two orbital decompression surgeries, a further surgery on one eye, and continued with high levels of steroids and other medications.
The disease, coupled with the prolonged high steroid use, changed my appearance dramatically. I had never been in the least bit vain, or given much thought to my 'looks'. I have two sisters, my younger sister is 'the pretty one', my elder sister is 'the domestic goddess', I was the middle one, 'the career girl', but I found coping with my changed face a massive challenge. I can remember being in IKEA, in the bedroom department, seeing someone walking towards me and thinking' Oooh, that strange looking woman is wearing the same coat as me'! When I realised I was walking towards a full length wardrobe mirror - and that strange looking woman WAS me, I just broke down and cried. I removed all the mirrors from my home, never EVER let anyone point a camera at me....
The first two pics were taken at National Institute of Health in Bethesda, Maryland, exactly 1 year apart. I attend NIH as a trial patient for a rare kidney cancer syndrome, these pics were taken in exactly the same place, same time of day, by the same camera.... the first picture was taken in September 2011 (approximately 6 months after the onset of Graves Disease), and the second picture was taken exactly a year later.
Fast forward to 1 year ago...... My eye disease is no longer active, I was weaned off my medications, and my ophthalmologist said that she would arrange for a blepharosplasty - to reduce the massively heavy and droopy upper lids which were a legacy of the Graves Disease. She explained this was routinely carried out following severe Graves, and with generally good results. We discussed my general facial appearance, and that fact that my skin hadn't 'snapped back' after the prolonged swelling (due to the heavy use of steroids); she commented that a lot of her patients seemed to suffer from similar heavy jowls and lower face 'fullness' post disease, and she said that she would refer me to Dr Cooper, to see if he would consider giving me a face lift. Bonzer! I felt that after years of struggling with the disease, the possibility of losing my eye sight, the very real threat of having to surrender my driving licence, the treatments and side effects, I was at last able to see light at the end of the tunnel, get some closure on what was a really difficult period of my life, and that I would be restored to the person looking at the camera in 2011. As a 'by the by', earlier this year I had a small growth on the tip of my nose curetted, which has left a noticeable scar, and this reinforced my self consciousness about my face.
The next pic was taken about 3 months ago. Looking at it NOW, apart from my hooded lids, I think I don't look terribly different from how I was pre-disease, apart from being 4 years older. But in my head, I was still the rather grotesque, scarey-looking pumpkin head my disease and treatment had transformed me into...
So - I got a date for my pre-op assessment, 2nd November, and surgery was scheduled for 17th. The pre-op assessment was conducted by a very sweet nurse, she told me that my notes said 'Facelift , 'plus or minus blepharoplasty'. And that the notes seemed to indicate that I was just going to have the facelift on 17th. Eh? I told her I understood that I was having both procedures, she was unable to speak with Dr Cooper whilst I was there, said she would check and contact me to let me know. A few days later she telephoned me, and said that my eyelid surgery had to be done by my ophthamologists - and that Dr Cooper had not scheduled it for 17th.
Apparently, after my initial consultation with Dr Cooper in January, he wrote to my consultant ophthamologist asking whether he was required to carry out the Blepharoplasty (I know this is true, I received a copy of his letter). I don't know whether he had a reply, my consultant retired a few months ago. At an appointment with him a few months ago I asked her successor whether my recently retired consultant had replied to Dr Cooper's letter, he told me he would find out, ensure that if my previous consultant hadn't responded that he would follow it up, and that there was no reason why Dr Cooper shouldn't do both procedures, so as far I knew it was sorted. But apparently not. So with just over a week to go, I was informed that I was getting a facelift but not eyelid surgery.
Wow! Not what I was expecting! I always knew I was going to get my hooded eyelids repaired, the facelift was an added extra, a Brucie Bonus, and here I was, booked in for a facelift, but no eyelid surgery.
I went ahead anyway. 8 days later, I am wondering whether I have made the biggest mistake of my life. My face was massively swollen post-op, I have extremely uneven contours on both cheeks, and my eyes, although untouched by 'the knife' are more swollen than ever. My mouth is drawn tightly across my face, I look like a monster.
I know it's early days, I had my staples and stitches removed on Monday (two days ago), but I don't feel I am ever going to look 'normal' again, which is all I ever wanted. I never minded looking my age, I just hated what my disease and treatment had done to my face.

Thanks Jormana, it's been a tough week, I wouldn't normally post on forums like this. I never disclose anything about my personal life on-line. I have a FB account but don't post up personal stuff, just 'news' about my charity. If I want to share something, offload my troubles, I pick up the phone, or drive to visit close family/friends and chat over a cup of tea. But I feel so isolated with this, I really don't feel my friends/family could begin to understand, yet reading through these posts I know I am in safe company and that readers will 'get' how I'm feeling. I can't believe I am 'emoting' to strangers, but it's a great comfort to be in the same room with people with whom I have something so intimate and personal in common.

Anyone, here are more pics, it's such a cathartic just to be able to share my feelings with people I know will understand, and I'm grateful. xx

These pics were taken in 2011 (just after the onset of disease) and exactly 1 year later. I didn't recognise my own face, and even though I had been told I was still in danger of losing my sight, I found the physical changes to my face more difficult to cope with on a day to day basis than the prospect of going blind.