Too Nervous to Decide Whether or Not to Go Through with "IT" - Spokane, WA

I am a mother of 2 beautiful children. Unfortunately for my poor body, I am left with is nothing but a horror scene. I have loose skin on my midsection and stretch marks all over my legs. I have done all the BeachBody workouts for years...And was a complete health nut. Of course this doesn't help the marks or the tummy. I have lost all motivation for the last 4 months and am feeling hopeless, lumpy, and loose.. I went in for a consult with Dr. Chad Wheeler in Spokane. I was so nervous I was a sweaty wreck and couldn't remember any of my questions. He was my 4th consult and may I say very thorough and seems to know his stuff. They treated me very well compared to the "others". I tend to have extremely high anxiety and lately my life has been pure chaos (last 2 years). I desperately want to be able to be active and not constantly worry about my shirt moving the wrong way. When clothed I give the impression I have something good to unveil, so I feel even worse at the beach or even with my poor husband. People look at me like "Damn" :(. I think if I were to go through with the surgery it would transform my energy levels and how I carry myself in public and with my children. I don't care about the scar, I have so many whats one more...I just want a tummy that doesn't dance to my every movement!!! I am going to go back to my dry skin brushing, diet, and exercise stuff...(been a long time).
Any advice?? Or words of wisdom to get my mind under control? Super worried and obsessing on this site. I have horrid skin and was advised on a circumferential TT, but am way to scared to consider being cut in half...and under the knife for that long. So I got the quote for a standard and if I choose to go through with any of it I may consider a second surgery. PS also said I have a small hernia.