Turning 48...5'7", 130lbs. - Southport, CT

I am one of those people who always puts everyone first. It's not a bad quality, especially if you are a mom... But after years of doing so, you kinda get used to coming last. You almost feel guilty for buying yourself something, or actually doing anything to benefit yourself. I don't want to sound like a martyr but there is a huge part of me that feels a bit guilty about deciding to do this for myself. I have my surgery scheduled for July 6, 2015. I am extremely excited yet nervous at the same time. I have not told my parents yet. Probably won't until it's over. I know. I know. I'm 48. It's just easier this way. My kids know. My don is 24 and my daughter is almost 21. They are supportive and happy for me. My fiancé is the best. He could care less if u shaved off my eyebrows. He loves me no matter what. I am doing this for ME. I have 34AA. I am the same size I was in the 6th grade. I did not breastfeed. But they are saggy anyway. I work three jobs and have paid my dues. Two more tuition payments and both kids will be out of college with no money borrowed. I am in decent shape. I power walk when I get 30 mins to myself. I waitress nights and am always in constant motion. I could use a few sit-ups tho but I'm not complaining. I eat well when I remember to eat. I am a smoker and will quit a month before surgery. I know I should do it now but I know me. The crazier I get about trying to quit, the more I will smoke. I am going with the textured teardrop sientra gummy bears. I'm not sure of the size yet. 260cc and 320cc looked good on the 3D imaging but the 370cc looked huge. If I was into 20's I'd go for the big ones but at 48 I don't want to look foolish. Is there anyone out there like me who can give me some advice?? I will be done with jobs one and two in June as I work in a school and babysit but job three is year round waitressing. I took two weeks off from that. Is that enough time? I have a high tolerance for pain. Had numerous surgeries including a hysterectomy and umbilical hernia surgery. Can't wait to hear from someone do I don't feel so alone. All my friends have big boobs with no surgery. They don't understand. I'll post before pics as soon as I can.

I never thought I'd post my naked self but I have to hear what you ladies think. I'm obsessing over not going too big. I will post the 3D versions of 260 and 320. I don't think there is much of a difference. I'm reading how everyone says they wish they went bigger so I'm leaning towards the 320. I wear the bombshell bras anyway so I look like I have something. So maybe it won't be so noticeable.??

My surgery will take place tomorrow morning at 7:30 am. I'm so excited and yet so nervous! I'm going with sientra 320 textured teardrop under the muscle. I am 5'7" and about 120-125 lbs. I just got back from vacation and am tan. Do not know if this is a bad thing? I had a couple glasses of wine and am still smoking. I know it's bad but I've been so nervous to try to quit that I've continued to smoke. I know. Bad. I was wondering if anyone had any last minute advice? I have my meds and bio oil. I got two bags of frozen peas. I have not purchased any bras or other items. I'm more of a figure it as I go kinda person. I can't make myself too crazy being over prepared. I just want it to be 24 hours from now and I can be on the other side of this and just focus on getting better. Any one who can help in anyway would be much appreciated. XO