34 y/o engaged mother of 2. Tired of being overweight

Confessions of a 34 year old junk food junkie......

Lol well..... I would like to first point out that this last month or so have been PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE!!! LOL NO WONDER YOU HAVE TO GO THRU A PSYCH EVALUATION AS A REQUIREMENT! SHEESH!!!! LOL

Its been rough only doing the 5 shakes a day diet. Not only did I start the 5 shakes a day diet about 2 days before I should have..... I got the absolutely WRONG flavors!! Lol my choices were strawberry and orange cream. Which I thought would be excellent choices. WRONG!!! I am so burned out on those two flavors now that it's sickening . I bought the flavors that you can add into the stuff... . But it never offset the strawberry or orange cream taste.

I didn't realize only until later that vanilla would have been a better choice since I could have added so many other flavors to it! Peanut butter.... caramel.... toffee..... the list goes on! Oh how I cheated myself! Lol

The first time I had a weak moment...... there were chips on the counter...... I had been walking past them all week. After endless strawberry and orange cream flavor.... I just need SOMETHING different. I unfolded the half devoured bad or cheddar and sour cream potato skins..... as the aroma lifted from the bad I was already a gonner!! It was intoxicating!! Lol temptation came over me and and I did it...... I couldn't help it.... it was there.... looking so.. so....... DELICIOUS!!! I licked the chip!!! Lol yes.... I said it. I licked the chip! I think EVERY satisfaction sensor in my brain lit up instantly! 4 days later....... I relapsed and did it again! Lol im my mind..... I figured it was not the ultimate pre-op diet sin since I didn't actually chew and swallow lol.

The cravings for a flavor variety in what I eat is absolutely unbearable sometimes! Even now...... doing this post op thin liquids is KILL ING ME! Lol i know it's only mental..... but i can swear I'm about to die some days lol. I need some texture in my life!!!!

I even can't wait until Monday when I am full liquid and can at least have creamed soups. My niece had a birthday party yesterday and I chewed up a piece of a burger only to spit it out in the trash then rinse my mouth out!!!

Uuugh..... some days I SERIOUSLY feel like I need rehab!!! Temptation is everywhere!!! I know I will do good when I can have regular food. It's not the candies and sweets that I'm craving! It's actual textured food! Chicken... fish.... meat! Lol

Hopefully I can tolerate red meats since it's been so long since I have actually eaten some. Lord willing! Lol

Here are a few pics...... I figured I would go ahead and let it all hang out so my Realself.com peeps can see true results! Lol please excuse my dry legs in these pics lol...... it is what it is. Hopefully soon I will have much better photo updates!!

I'm 4 days post op now. Had my surgery in Monday 2/20. The hospital staff was wonderful my doctor and his nurse was wonderful. I think my surgery went very well.

I arrived at 730am to get prepped. I was the third surgery on his list so my surgery was not until around 10 am. The first thing they asked me for when I was getting undressed was a urine sample. Lol i looked at the nurse and belted out a hefty laugh! I said.... girl..... I have not had a sip of ANYTHING since around 10pm last night. I smacked my dry lips together and pushed my belly in and out saying.... my mouth is over here like the Sahara! I doubt you will get 2 drops from me! Lol that of course made her laugh. I struggled but was able to give them about 5 drips of pee that I strategically cause in a specimen cup by miracle!

They got the IV started and gave me something "just in case I was feeling nervous". I am not one to take medications..... but i didn't pass that up since I had a million emotions running through me already.

The anesthesiologist came in... gave me my lovenox injection, they gave me a patch behind my ear for nausea, and also made me swish and spit 60 cc of peridex (mouth wash). My fiance was sitting in the recliner already knocked out since he worked the night before. They rolled me off into the OR and transferred me to the surgery table where the last thing I really remember was them putting a mask on my face and telling me they were going to secure my arms.

When I woke up in the recovery room my throat and mouth were extremely dry! My throat was sore from being intubated. The nurses were extremely nice and attentive. They let me know that they were waiting for a room to open up. I didn't actually get into my room until around 1pm. But I understood that Mondays were the heavy days for surgery. When I got to my room my Mom and fiancé were already there waiting on me. They made me go ahead and walk to get inside the room and get into bed. I didn't have very much pain at that point so it was relatively easy. I had an over good experience. That made me walk 4 times a shift and joked that every time I did "walk" I was leaving them in the dust lol.

They kept me stocked up with pain meds, nausea meds, and IV fluids. I had no real issues with pain at all. The only time I really felt any kind of pain was when I was pulling myself in and out of bed. I think from pulling my own body weight up. But it was internal pain, I never had any incisional pain and still dont.

I was sent home with liquid hydrocodone but have only taken it once. Since my bed sits rather high..... the only pain I feel is when I am getting in bed or when I am repositioning on my sides when I'm laying down.

The bloated and gas feeling was the worst part of it. I think because I felt so bloated and gassy.... it was hard for me to actually get or keep anything down. The new whey protein shots have started to become nauseating. Which is funny because I thought they were the best thing in the world when I was stuck with the 5 shakes a day lol. Just the smell of them now make me was to hurl. At my post op follow up appointment yesterday (3 days post op) the nurse practitioner ensured me that the nausea was common and the bloating would resolve in a few days. She also recommended that if I can't tolerate the protein shots anymore (and I absolutely REFUSE to endure those bariatric advantage shakes any longer!!! Lol) that I should get some protein powder from GNC that was flavorless called Genepro. You can mix it with anything and it won't change the consistency of it. It's 30g of protein per tblsp. Works wonders!!!

I actually woke up today with little to no pain when moving, a butt load of energy, and NO bloated feeling. Today is the first day since surgery that I have not questioned my reasons for this decision. I guess I was just discouraged with the pain and bloating and discomfort. Not to mention...... having pains that I SWEAR were feelings of hunger! Lol may have just been gas. But who knows. Lol