Over the rainbow - 9-week photos - Seattle, WA
Hi gals - So amazing to join this team of amazing...
Hi gals - So amazing to join this team of amazing women who bring so much comfort, education, and support to this very emotional process. I'm having a moment of insecurity tonight (along with probably too may champagnes tonight celebrating summer's final arrival) and decided to join Realself finally.
I have read many stories so far and feel very encouraged by all the details shared - with great laughs, comraderie, and intamcy! Thank you for being here! I HAD to join because of what you have given me so far!
I am 43 yo and 34G (per Nordstrom but still can't wear it comfortably - spill out and they are put on a platform for all to see - so I actually squeeze into a Bali 34DD (hate underwires) to minimize). 5'6" and about 180 lbs (no kids) and have tried for 12 years to lose 40+ lbs with very concerted effort and I believe the metabolism is now dead! I have had 2 half marathon goals and got to the 5 mile point of training and failed due to chafing boobies and life. I desperately want to run without having to hold my boobs in place with the whole neighborhood watching. Not to mention the clothes, bras, neck/shoulder pain, and overall selfconsciousness we all feel. These puppies just grew from my 20s onward and I don't see an end in sight.
I had my first consult with a PS about 3 weeks ago. She was very nice and encouranging, and the office was spa like (kinda prefer the clincal feel myself), but I didn't feel a connection and after the consult I perused her before/after photos and was not convinced that she was going to give me what I expected. Only 2 out of about 100 outcomes would I have been pleased with. Mainly the areolas were in an odd spot (facing far out) and overall everything seemed too wide. This is definitely an art as well as a science (I know cosmetics is not the main priority when going through this - the elimination of pain and embarassment with clothes is utmost for me - but I want to feel good about myself naked in the mirror for the first time in years).
So I decided to schedule a second consult - both my gyn and an acquaintance have recommend this next PS with 25 yrs experience and an educator - I am hopeful. My appointment is this Tuesday, Aug 7th. Was trying to lose 5 lbs before the appointment but somehow gained that much - must be psychological sabotage - not deserving of this gift since I cannot lose weight.
My fears tonight...my belly! All I can see right now when I look down are the boobies. But when I hold them up/push them into normal position, my belly is big. What if this is a mistake and afterwards all my focus will be on the belly. I am so hopeful that after this looooong desired surgery, I will get all this new energy to start my running goals again along with planks to get this flab gone. But what if I I can't? I know I'll never be Jennifer Aniston or even the 116 lb bride that I was, but a reasonable 40+yo weight is all that I wish...and of course to walk around the house without a bra and without the shirts tucked inderneath, and without the huge grooves in my shoulders.
So...this process is just beginning for me and I am very anixous at this point but also comforted by the support I know I will get here - nobody else knows the feelings you share with me - not even supporting husband, family. I am hoping insurance will cover this and am still waiting for the first consult to be submitted and acknowledged by insurance. Their non-insurance/cosmetic quote total was approximately $6800 with anesthesiologist/hospital, etc.
More to come after my consult. Thanks again for this sisterhood!! You are the BEST. Hope everyone is healing well - I think of you and check in often and wonder how it must be....
(PS - the bulldog thing - we love English bulldogs - joy of joys)
Niesey's provider
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Welcome Bulldog! Even if it is liquid courage, so glad you jumped on board with us! A lot of women hear that others think they have lost weight after the surgery. I am 41. Had my surgery a year ago and am thrilled that I did. Hope your appointment today went well!
Had an excellent consult yesterday, as hard as it...
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So glad you liked your PS. Will be anxious to hear your insurance company's decison. Best of luck. Will be anxious to see your pictures, but only post what you feel comfortable with. If nothing else, maybe post pictures with a bra or even a t-shirt and save the bare ones for just at home. But get something so you can compare before and afters. You will enjoy watching the transformation!
Just checking in and posting my pictures. Still...
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Good luck with your approval! Your pictures are incredible. You have such a tiny waist that your new little boobs will totally flatter your figure!
I do remember that Niesey! A few weeks prior to surgery I would look in the mirror and think, "My boobs really aren't that big." But then I would look at my pictures of those bare boobs and think, "Holy Cripes, they really are THAT big! And they are horribly ugly too!" Just know that as you wrestle with these thoughts, that you have a whole community here to cheer you on! If you need absolutely support or encouragement, don't hesitate to reach out to any of us. This site is full of wonderful friends that can really boost your spirits. I just know that you are going to be so thankful once this is all behind you. The difference in your level of comfort, your mobility, and your confidence is amazing! Do you have your surgery date yet?
I had my BR 1 week ago on 29th August 2012.. My BR started at 0800 and i was out of theatre for 1330 and in recovery until 230pm.
Once i was back in my room I noticed my neck felt 'loose', in fact, I had NO PAIN in my neck, shoulders or upper back - at all. None ..zilch!! It was fantastic.
I slept as i had a morphine pump for 3 days, but by 8pm the first post op night, I needed the loo. The Nurse and my partner helped me to the bathroom, and when I stood up, I nearly fell over as I realised I was stood up straight!
I looked in the mirror.. and OMG, I couldn't believe what i saw!!! My boobs were tiny, in a good way and compared to the big boobs; (clad in lacy, monster-sized industrial steel enforced bra's) I had before, = 34GG/H (UK size!!)
Have you ever had those moments when you have to look 2 or 3 times to check your eyes are seeing properly??
Your brain can't quite take it all in?
My first thought was wow... but i look like i've had a mastectomy... did my PS find something and not tell me?( I was on a high dose of morphine so i was not in the most perceptual mind state!)
So after checking I had boobs and they were amazing.. I then saw my abdomen!
My body has always been my smallest part. I wear size 12 (uk) (?size 6/8 US?) jeans and i am not sylph-like at all. I have a tummy but my arms and legs hips etc are slim. But all i could see is my abdomen... how 'big' and flabby it was! I could also see i had a long body!! It's been hidden even when I lost alot of weight 6 years ago (size 14 top and size 8 jeans UK (=size 8 top and size 2 US??) I had a 28GG/H boobs.
So now, 1 week post BR, and wearing a surgical/clinical light support bra in white and with my newly seen abdomen complete with flab...i still look amazing!! People who have visited me have gasped at how much 'weight' i've lost! When i have pointed out my 'abdomen', my partner and friends have said 'what abdomen'?I am now 'bottom heavy', or should I say a classic womanly shape. I love my lower half as it was he part of me that people would notice and i often heard comments such as; "if you didn't have those boobs, you would look fantastic", or "that dress, top (whatever i tried on) would look so much nicer... but your boobs make you look big in it". So now even though I can see my tummy, its nothing compared to the huge boobs I had to endure before.
When you lose weight, did it go from everywhere in your body except your breasts? It did for me. So i know once i am stronger approx 6-8 weeks time, I will walk fast with my dog and i have vowed to stop eating chocolate and rubbish to get rid of my abdominal 'fat'. Niesey, you will look and feel amazing after this BR. I read this so many times on here and how 'in a heart beat' women would do it again if they had to. I now understand why.
I appreciated why before... but i now KNOW. Your confidence will go through the roof, your pain will stop and you will be overwhelmed at how nice tops look on you!! I hope that gives you some perspective on things? Any change in body image can cause a shift in our perception whether its a wanted procedure (BR) or its placed upon us (Mastectomy). We will all differ in how we cope and process that change emotionally. Some may mourn the 'loss' of boobs as it once defined who they were and they are sad but then are fine from then onwards. Some are just so thankful its gone and live well not batting an eyelid! For others, it highlights other imperfections to such a degree hey need more surgery eg a TT and again some women decide right i will ea healthily and exercise. We are individuals! If i have surgery again its for V V's as my legs since having kids are like maps of the british motorway system!! But for now thats nothing as i LOVE my new perky boobs!! Good luck and if your ready- go for it! X x
Welcome to the community!! Glad to have you here with us!!
Keep gathering your information and doing the research. You will find the perfect doctor and be glad you took the time for the consults.
Take a deep breath and baby steps and you will get there. Let us know how the next consult goes!!