My Experience on Accutane

Accutane was the last resort for me to clear my acne. Truthfully my acne wasn't awful. I suffered from facial acne for years and occasionally had acne on my back. However, I was at the point that I couldn't remember the last time my face was clear and I was also developing the potential for scarring. I went to several dermatologists over the years and tried everything to clear my acne from antibiotics, creams, washes, facials and anything else one uses to treat acne. Finally I convinced my parents to let me try Accutane since I knew of someone who had taken it and their outcome was successful and of course I did my own research... but did I really... Now that I look back on it, I was so blind about the terrible side effects that everyone is bound to experience on this drug whether it's mild to severe. I was only convincing myself that the "miracle reviews" would be me one day. And I was so wrong. The entire process of taking Accutane is exhausting. The blood work every month along with the appointment can be difficult to schedule and god forbid if you miss your "window" you almost have to start the whole process over again. It's very government controlled. Then there's also the online comprehension questions which are incredibly repetitive. I'm also required to use two forms of birth control even though I'm not sexually active. The side effects of birth control in itself can be frightening! I have felt like my life revolves around this drug. My Accutane prescriber is not only my dermatologist, but also my therapist I feel like when I visit her once a month! Even though I really do appreciate my dermatologist because she is so attentive and respectful, she honestly doesn't understand what Accutane FEELS like. Yes her sister was on Accutane and now her face is flawless and her child was healthy with no birth defects that this drug causes if one gets pregnant while taking it, but my dermatologists only knows what Accutane LOOKS like because she can see the results of how Accutane works. Obviously she's aware of the physical side effects but I'm emphasizing the mental side effects. I have to admit that I don't and haven't felt normal while on Accutane. I LOOK normal and have gotten countless compliments about my new complexion, but I don't FEEL normal. I haven't felt like myself for months. I'm extremely paranoid and self-conscious about all of these physical and even mental side effects that I have. I wonder if other people notice and I become really insecure. By the third month while taking Accutane I finally saw the results. I never thought I would say that I don't have acne anymore. I'm definitely not saying that I will never get another blemish, but after all I have gone through I think I and everyone else who has been on this drug should be guaranteed and deserves to have clear skin forever! So about the side effects... I experienced them immediately. I thought my dermatologist was being dramatic about the dry lips but she wasn't kidding! Basically the side effects started as annoying yet tolerable but progressed to being intense and miserable. I have no idea how some people have managed to stay on 60mg a day. I could barely last a week. I had to go down to 30mg a day and even the 40mg was too much at times. I was "supposed" to reach 80mg a day but that would be suicide. Without going into detail, my side effects have been: the extremely dry lips and all around my mouth, dry and bloody nose, dry eyes, dry scalp, dry ears, pretty much my entire face has just been DRY, my neck is very sensitive and itchy, and my arms are beyond sensitive. A scratch on my arms turns into a wound that lasts for eternity to heal. I have to be very careful shaving and what products I use because my entire body is so delicate. My cholesterol has always been fine but Accutane has made it high, along with the fact that I have developed diabetic symptoms and have hypoglycemia. Meaning I constantly have to hydrate myself by drinking plenty of water and I have to keep my blood sugar up by feeding myself nutritional foods often throughout the day. I have at least one strong headache a day and I feel nauseated and dizzy with vertigo regularly. My heart feels like it's going to beat out of my chest which makes me feel so restless. I can't be in the sun for very long at all or I will burst into flames! I have a very hard time sleeping. I'm usually wide awake at night and sleep deprived during the day. I always feel tried. So now for the mental side effects since it just doesn't affect you physically: having OCD while on Accutane is interesting. I live a balanced life and have had control over my OCD for a few years. Also, instead of negatively associating my OCD, I try to use it to benefit me, but I have felt myself going back to my old ways and habits while on Accutane and some days are just not the best. I'm always anxious and nervous, I have experienced a few panic attacks, and I feel hot and like I'm going to explode from burning up inside. I tend to feel warm quite easily anyways and now I always feel like I'm sweating and just can't get cooled down enough to relax. I have also felt unreasonably emotional, confused, depressed, fatigued, stressed, impatient, indecisive, hysterical, and insane. I can't help but ask myself daily why I'm on Accutane still?! Apparently I have two more months to go. Everything in my being wants to stop consuming this chemical into my body but a sick part of me wants to reach the end of this treatment.