Wanting to Feel Comfortable in My Own Skin Again After 2 Kids - Portland, OR

After having the implants drained in office a week ago, I got the shells of the implants removed yesterday afternoon. The draining was only mildly uncomfortable and yes- the immediate results were sort of shocking but I could see a lot of improvement within about 3 days. The actual removal of the implants was very quick (about 15 minutes total) and I had no pain during or immediately after. I popped two Tylenol, put my shirt and coat on over my bandaged chest and went to an afternoon meeting.

I appreciate that my doctor agreed to do the procedure under local anesthetia, because the idea of general when not absolutely necessary made me very nervous. I had read lots of accounts on here of other women who had the explant done under local, and that made me feel more confident in having it done while awake.

The staff, as well as Dr. Waldorf, were very friendly and professional. They made sure I was comfortable and well informed about what was going on.

The pain did start to creep up later in the day after the procedure, but the prescribed pain pills helped a lot. I only took Tylenol during the day today, as the prescription pills make me really tired, and that worked for the most part.

Making the leap to get the implants out is without a doubt the best choice I could have made (aside from never getting them to begin with). I already feel so much more comfortable and "free". Ironically enough, I have gained a sense of appreciation for my body that I may not have ever gotten if I hadn't put myself through this. In hindsight, I think I was in something of a constant state of annoyance and stress while having the implants- knowing they're gone is a huge relief psychologically.

Obviously these are all my personal opinions but if I could give any advice for anyone considering getting implants, I would say to trust you instincts. If you have a tinge of doubt, go with that. If you are very active; enjoy running, yoga, or even sleeping on your stomach, implants might not be for you.

I wanted to update this to share my experience with anyone else going through or considering going through this journey. All of the women on RealSelf have really helped me by sharing their stories and I am grateful to have had this community to reference through all of this.

Xx

I wanted to hold off on writing an update until I felt that I had my true "final result", which I feel comfortable writing now.

As for my stomach, I am pleased enough with the result. I knew that I wasn't going to ever be back in a bikini again (because there is just no way to remove the amount of stretch marks I have/had), my main concern was not having that pot belly look (at 117lbs, nonetheless). The abdominoplasty definitely resolved that issue, and I do fell much better in clothing that I had pretty much written off pre-op because of the way it accentuated my stomach. I opted in for the vertical scar (as well as the horizontal), so I have nothing to complain about there; I already had a c-section scar and a ton of stretch marks, so while she was able to get rid of a fair amount of those, I traded lots of tiny scars for one big one. I don't think my belly button looks great- I've definitely seen a lot of better looking results from other surgeons. But again- wasn't going to a bikini belly anyway.

Regarding my breast augmentation:
Approaching the idea of getting a BA I was very, very clear with the surgeons I met with that I wanted a very small augmentation- something that looked "natural" and that I absolutely did not want to be larger than a C, but a full B would be great. I got 225cc silicone implants and am a whopping DD. Nordstrom has measured me twice at a 30E. Yes, E. That was sort of the first real blow to my confidence in the decision I made. Finding out that the breasts that I paid thousands of dollars to "fix" because I had such a hard time finding bras and swimwear that fit correctly, were now so wide and large for my frame that- wait for it!... would give me a hard time finding bras and swimwear that fits correctly. I know for some women bigger = better, but I am not in that camp, and if I ever had to tell anyone that I wear a 30E, I would feel absolutely humiliated. I brought my concerns up to Dr. Waldorf's office and mentioned that I was thinking about just having them removed. Pretty much none of the reasons that I opted to have a BA were actually improved by having the surgery, and I wasn't very happy that I spent a few thousand dollars to end up on the opposite end of a problem that I already had. She was very cold and unsympathetic in her response- she can come off quite condescending as well (I have read this from other patients of hers, but figured if the work was good...). She had her assistant give me pricing to have them removed, have them removed with a lift, or have the implants switched out. (between about 3-7 thousand dollars)

I read a lot of reviews prior to my surgery from women who said that they experienced something of an emotional rollercoaster following their surgery, but ultimately ended up happy and the rollercoaster of feelings was pretty normal. I braced myself to feel the same way, so I wasn't extremely worried when I had these feelings of doubt after the surgery. Unfortunately for me, at 16 months post op, none of these doubts or bad feelings have resolved. I do not feel like I can lay on my stomach at all, as it is so uncomfortable (I used to love doing yoga and sleeping on my stomach). They are so heavy, all the time, that I hate not wearing a bra, and really only feel adequately supported when I am wearing a sports bra. I don't jog anymore because it feels so disgusting having them rub up and down inside my skin. I am always aware of these hard water bags inside my chest. On top of them being constantly uncomfortable, a size I did not want, and so heavy that I don't want to ever go braless (one of the reasons I got the surgery to begin with was to feel like I could confidently go without one when I pleased), my left implant has dropped further down in the past month and the implant is now sitting below my breast tissue. There is a slight noticeable difference from a profile view (I will upload the comparisons soon), but it absolutely feels different to to the touch- it is purely the implant along the bottom of my breast now and it feels DISGUSTING.

I brought my concerns about the movement up to Dr. Waldorf's office and they asked me to come in for an exam. While it has clearly moved, Dr. Waldorf refused to admit so and would only say she "appreciates that it feels different to me". She showed me comparison pictures of now, vs when I first had them placed, but curiously didn't show me the profile view where you could actually see the difference. I don't think that was a coincidence. At this point, I just want them gone. I clearly was not someone who should have gotten implants in the first place, I should have just embraced the breasts that nursed my two children for almost two years each and moved on. But even aside from that, there is now an actual issue, which my PS refuses to recognize (I'm not sure how far down my chest I'd have to let this thing fall for her to admit there's something going on). Since I have no interest in having surgery after surgery for these things, my only option is to spend the $2943 to get them out (a procedure her assistant so nicely explained "takes about 30-40 minutes").

I'm counting down the minutes until I can schedule the explant. While I'm hoping that I haven't made things dramatically worse, the fact that I went "small" (I can only imagine if I had gone bigger, as one PS suggested when I was shopping around) in my implant size and that it hasn't been a terribly long time gives me a little bit of hope. Unfortunately for me, this is a very expensive lesson to learn, but I knew from the beginning I wouldn't ever know unless I did it.

Regarding my choice in plastic surgeons, I cannot say that I would recommend Dr. Waldorf. I don't think her work is exceptional, and she certainly doesn't work at bargain prices. More than that, her bedside manner can best be described as "frigid" and she can come off as condescending in her remarks. And you certainly don't want to have to bring up a flaw in her work to her.

I will update when I proceed with the removal (and kiss plastic surgery goodbye forever).

Today is the first day I have noticed any improvement. Day 1 and 2 post-op were about the same- my boobs felt extremely tight and hard, and my abdomen burned at the slightest movement. Getting in and out of bed was extremely difficult and walking to the bathroom was exhausting. Today, getting in and out of bed has been a bit easier; I'm still slow getting around, but any improvement is good. I honestly didn't realize how rough the MM recovery would be, but I'm kind of glad I didn't know, because I may not have gone for it :) I'm sure once this is all past, I will be nothing but thrilled.

I took a shower yesterday (with help), and I felt so much better being clean. I'm still slightly hunched over when I walk, but not as bad as the past two days. I've had absolutely no appetite since the surgery, so I've been trying to make myself eat little bites of things here and there. I haven't had a BM since the day before the surgery =O which is making me nervous. I got so badly constipated after my last c-section and it was the WORST when I finally went, that I got really nervous about it happening again after this surgery. The day before surgery I ate nothing but a bunch of raw fruits and vegetables (stuff that I thought would move along quickly) and drank A LOT of water. I've been drinking a lot of water, as well as a mixture of prune juice and coconut water every day since, and still nothing. I also have been having a cup of Smooth Move tea (by Traditional Medicinals) every night before bed, which usually works like magic for me. Hopefully that situation resolves itself soon.