49 and Finally Going for It - Novato, CA

I have always been small chested (34A, sometimes a 32B) and have always been self conscious about it. At times, I have thought about getting a BA, but never seriously considered it for a variety of reasons: i.e. financial, fear of surgery and of putting a foreign body inside me, etc. I finally began to seriously consider doing this last summer. I went in for a consult in November and almost scheduled surgery for February, before chickening out. Then after rethinking about it some more, I eventually scheduled my surgery for July 27th, two days away!

My stats are: I am petite 5'1", 110 lbs. I am active; I do a lot of yoga, hiking, bar works classes, etc. I have been obsessed with this site for months now. It has been really helpful, so I thought I would post my own profile. My biggest fear, aside from complications and health problems related to the implants, is looking too big! I really do not want to look big! I am hoping to be a B only and am pretty sure I will go with 250cc (Mentor gummy bear under). I'm not sure which type, the high profile or the moderate round). I want to look as natural as possible. Any suggestions?

I kind of had a mini freak out this past week. My sister was concerned (tends to be an overly anxious person) about my upcoming BA. She had read various things on the internet related to breast implants that sounded alarming. I assured her that it would be fine, but later started reading on the Internet myself. (Not that I hadn't read and researched previously). As I'm sure many of you know there are a lot of conflicting things out there regarding breast implants. Anyway, I got myself all freaked out and started having doubts, getting cold feet about the whole thing. I began to think that maybe I was making a huge mistake! I felt better the next day after talking to the coordinator at the PS office, who said it is completely normal to be having these feelings. I also felt better after calling a friend who has had implants for 8 years and has not had any problems. Last night though, I had a stressful dream about showing up for my surgery and the doctor not being there. The nurse was telling me she thought she could handle it on her own and the conditions were not terribly sanitary. Yikes!

I cannot believe that tomorrow is the big day! I am a nervous wreck! I keep having thoughts like: what if I am not happy with the results and regret doing this?, What if I am making a huge mistake? I was out buying food and other items in preparation for tomorrow and whenever I'd see a small chested woman, I'd think: she doesn't look so bad; did I really need to do this? Also, I am on edge because the PS and the anesthesiologist may call at any moment. I have to go to a BBQ soon for my mother-in-law's birthday and am worried they will call at an inopportune time. In addition, I slept horribly last night because of my anxiety. I'm sure many of you have had similar feelings, right? Ugh!