I got a breast augmentation when I was 22 years old, July 2001 in Beverly Hills, CA. I have always been a pretty small person, 5'4" weighing around 98lbs (prior to implants) and very flat chested. Having large boobs was never the main reason for getting my implants, it was mostly about wanting to fit better in clothing and look good in bathing suits. I got saline implants, 475cc in each breast. They were huge on my small frame and I was super happy the second I took a peek at them for the first time in the mirror, but even more happy when I went shopping and could fit into just about anything I wanted. It was awesome and I was loving my new boobies!
There were times over the next few years that they would be tender or sore, but I usually wrote it off as 'Ahh.. I must have slept wrong last night' or 'I took my bra off too early." One time though I can remember not liking how these foreign objects felt inside my body and thinking to myself, 'I wish I could take them out' and then immediately thinking 'That's not an option, I guess I'm stuck with them now.' Many years passed and I never gave another thought to having them removed, but they are something I never really forget are there, and they certainly remind me often because I am a very active, outdoors type of person. I guess being young (in my 20's) with nice looking boobs was more important to me at the time than the pain they caused or restrictions they imposed. (Achy back, sleepless nights, etc.)
Now 13 years later (from the time I got them)... My husband and I have recently taken on a new hobby, Golf! We went to the driving range for practice last Saturday and we each hit 2 buckets of balls. The next day, Sunday, I was feeling some soreness in my core area and by Monday, holy smokes, I felt like I had bruises on my rib cage and my breasts are so sore it hurts to touch them. The way I have to stand and stretch my arms and the club over my boobs just to hit the ball is ridiculous. It made realize how restricting breast implants can be and in that moment of truth, I thought to myself, 'I wish I could take them out.'
With that thought, I decided to do a Google search to see if that was even a thing. Do women take out their implants and leave them out? I really didn't know. That is how I found this amazing website and support forum, a Google search. When I found out there was an entire section dedicated to this very topic I couldn't stop reading. I stayed up past Midnight until my eyes couldn't stay open any longer reading story after story after story of brave women that have shared their own experiences with Breast Implant Removal.
After reading all of the stories and doing a little research on the topic it was pretty clear to me this is something I want to do. I sort of hit my husband out of left field with the topic when telling him I was considering having it done, and since I have never expressed any discomfort or concern about my implants in the past, he told me I should 'sleep on it for a while' to make sure it is something I really want to do and wont regret. The thing is, I have been thinking about this from time to time for a while now and I know in my heart it is what I want to do. Once he realized this was something I have been thinking about for a long time now, he was immediately supportive and told me he wants to be there with me throughout this journey every step of the way. I could not ask for more. Being that he is really the only one that will see me nude after the surgery, I'm not really concerned with any scars or having tiny boobies. I'm actually kind of looking forward to it. I just want to go back to my normal self and be able to workout and participate in extreme sports again without worrying about my breasts being in the way or causing me pain. They are so heavy and constantly aching which I believe is causing my back pain as well.
So, today I made an apt with a local PS that has received extremely high recommendations from this site and other members on who have had the same procedure preformed by her. The receptionist exceeded my expectations when I called and answered so many questions right over the phone. She was kind and warm and made me feel good from the time she answered the phone. It probably sounds silly, but this (to me) is a pretty huge decision and that comforting voice eased my nervousness tremendously. She said they could fit me in tomorrow morning for a consultation if I could make it, and I confirmed, yes.
This is all happening so fast now, I went from just a thought of wishing I no longer had my implants, to a Google search finding this support group, making an apt for tomorrow morning, and I most likely will make an apt for the surgery if everything goes well in the consultation with the PS.
Now that the ball is rolling I have the feeling of, 'I just want them out!' At times I try to put myself in the situation of how I may feel once they are out. It is so emotional for me, I feel like I'll be able to take a deep breath and get on with my life, it will be such a huge relief! I'm 34 years old now and willing to accept my body the way it was meant to be. I feel like I will be able to live a much healthier active life without pain from my implants and I am looking forward to this new chapter more than anything.
I have decided to document my journey here and plan to be as open and honest as possible throughout this process in hopes it will help or inspire someone else to do the same. Thank you to all the women who so bravely shared their stories as it has helped me in making this decision! I plan to update this often to express any emotions or feelings I may be going through as well.
Currently, I am feeling anxious, nervous and lots of anticipation for my consultation tomorrow.
I will keep you all updated :)
I plan to post 'before and after' pics after the procedure has been preformed and I have had some time to heal.