360 Liposuction, Abdomen. Scared and worried. I want my body back.

It’s been 20 weeks since my surgery. I deleted my initial review (in depth review of the whole experience), but I could really use the support of this community right now. I’m feeling pretty alone, hopeless, and devastated at this point. Hoping someone has some experience with this or can offer some advice to help me get my body back.
I had 360 liposuction on my abdomen March 1st. I saved for four years, and chose my doctor because he was the best according to everything that I had read (and note- my outcome is probably not typical. I’ve seen his before-and-after photos on his website. I’m sure many many many people leave there looking stunning so please- it’s not personal at all). Unfortunately, ever since surgery I’ve been 1-2 sizes bigger than I was before and I’ve lost hope of seeing my body again. I feel like there’s this pocket of water between my skin and my muscle and I just can’t get it to go away. On top of that, there's a weird bulge on my side that I didn't have before. It just showed up after surgery. Overall, the swelling gets bigger some days then goes back to it's normal puffiness the next (thats why I range between 1 and 2 sizes bigger depending on the day). I was told the swelling would go down within two weeks. It’s even in all the literature I was given. But, it’s now been 18 weeks and I can’t stop bursting into tears every time I look in the mirror. I feel like I’m going crazy. I’ve never had anything like this happen to me and I’ve had surgeries in the past (never cosmetic, but some big surgeries nonetheless). I look at my stomach in the mirror 10 times a day, and weigh myself constantly. I’m sure it wasn’t intentional, but I just can’t understand how I paid $12,900 to come away this big and swollen. I’m so embarrassed. I’m mortified and honestly- I’m scared that this is going to be how I look forever. I’m in my early 30’s and I’m single. I can't live like this. This can’t be my body. I’ve worked too hard for this to happen. I look like I’m pregnant. All I wanted was to be able to wear a bathing suit with confidence this summer and now I don’t want to leave my house. I haven’t gone out and socialized more than two or three times since the surgery (March 1, today is July 4 [I'm definitely not out in a bikini today...] ). I still wear my compression garment since I can’t fit into 90% of my clothes anymore and I can’t bring myself to buy a new, bigger wardrobe. I’m completely devastated and depressed and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I just feel so stupid. Why did this happen to me when all the other patient photos look amazing? Why did I deserve to end up this way? I’m not a bad person. I don’t know why god is pushing me to this extent. I even spoke to an attorney (there was a refund offered but I guess I ruined it by asking for more to cover the additional expenses since this hasn’t been a typical or easy recovery…They stopped speaking to me after that. I know it’s stupid but my ex-boyfriend used to always tell me “ask for what you want”… and so I did. I wanted to be me again and I asked for what I thought it would take to get there. I tried to act strong about it but I was stupid. I should have just walked away with what I paid them. It would have been better than nothing). Anyway, the attorney I spoke with laughed when I told him how much I paid for liposuction. I felt so stupid and foolish. While he agreed to follow up with them, I never talked to him again. Im so embarrassed and I've already lost enough money to pay for a year of grad school. I’m a complete idiot and the attorney was right to react that way. Only an insecure moron would give up that much money and their life for months and walk away like this.
I’m wondering if this has happened to anyone else following 360 liposuction. If so- did you ever return to your old size? How long did your swelling last and did you ever look the same again? I’ve started fasting in hopes that even if the swelling won’t go down, maybe I’ll lose enough of my body mass to make up for it. I’m currently doing 3 days of fasting, 1 day of food, repeat. I’m exhausted and starving but I’m starting to get used to it. Unfortunately it’s really hard to do cardio for more than like 30 minutes a day on this diet. I feel drained but I think in time I’ll adjust to it and hopefully by the end of summer I’ll have my old body back. Praying every day. If anyone else has had a similar experience PLEASE tell me what you did. Does fasting work? All I want is to be normal again. I’m so scared this will last forever. I’m losing my mind looking at myself in the mirror. Any advice is very appreciated!!

July 4th, 4 months and 4 days post surgery

Fasting is really hard, but it seems to be helping, at least with the bulge. It's a little less prominent today, and I look less puffy than 2 days ago.