Masseter Muscle Disinsertion - Jaw Angle Implant

I’ve always hated my jawline. I have a naturally small rounded face and I’ve always dreamed of having a chiseled angular look like Angelina Jolie. I’ve learned the hardest way possible that you cannot change the structure of your face. I had cheek implants and a wrap around jaw implant with the same doctor (who I’m afraid to name because they apparently sue people for bad reviews), and my cheek implants are totally crooked and the jaw implant is too big. My face is shaped like a lopsided rectangle now lol (very much giving Lord Farquaad from Shrek). The worst part is, I love laughing - a big laugh with my mouth open and a wide smile. If I do this, my jaw looks HUGE and unnatural. I’m a 98 lb 5’ female. My jaw looks like it should be on a 6’5” Nordic warrior. I always hated the cheek implants and wanted them out because the left one is high up near my temple and the left one is on my cheekbone but sticks out like a little nub. At first I liked the jaw implant, because the swelling hid the fact that the angles are extremely sharp and my masseter muscle is bunched up above the implant. I now experience tightness on my jaw, ringing in my ears, and my chin always feels tingly. But honestly I’m mostly sad I can’t use my face the same way I used to be able to. I look back at photos and videos of my old face, and I can’t believe I convinced myself I needed to do this. I remember crying myself to sleep at night thinking about how ugly I looked. I would give anything to go back. Now, I cry myself to sleep knowing I can’t go back to my old face. Nothing has changed, except my bank account haha! I wanted to go from a 6 to at least an 8. I’ve just gone from a 6 to a 6 with a bigger jaw lol. Unfortunately, the doctor put the implants under all my muscles and onto the bone. It seems from my research, this masseter disruption is permanent. Even if I take the implant out, my masseter muscle will always be above my mandible. This feels like when you get a bad haircut, except it’s permanent haha. I thought implants were reversible, but really they can just be taken out. Whatever they do to [RS bleep] up your face, is permanent baby. There is not enough literature on the possible side effects of jaw angle implants. I am just now finding it and I did research for a year before deciding to go through with these implants. I always had confidence, even though I thought was so ugly. My confidence is definitely shot now, because this has revealed to me, that I’m the type of idiot who gets a crazy surgery for the sake of vanity. This has truly taken so much of my life away. Death seems like such a sweet escape right now lol. Just kidding (but not really). I’m not sure why I’m writing this. It’s kind of healing to get it all out. Hopefully, your reading this because you wanted these procedures, and now you will not go through with it. I made a mistake, and I hope you don’t make the same mistake as me. Changing the way your face looks will not give you more confidence or make you more happy. I know you probably will go and do something, so at least do this: find a doctor who will tell you “no”. This doctor I went to never said no and didn’t guide me in what would be possible or look good on my face. It’s obvious now she just wanted my money and didn’t care if she butchered my face. But when I was in it, it really seemed like she knew what she was doing. No one knows what they’re doing! So find a surgeon who will say, “no,” because at least you know they’re not just out for your money, and won’t just do anything to your precious face. Also, feel free to send me photos of yourself, and what you want to get done, and I will tell you if you’re just being too hard on yourself. I feel like we’re all comparing ourselves to the most beautiful people in the world, and it’s so unnecessary (I write, as I compare a photo of my new face to a photo of Karrueche lawl). You’re probably super attractive, and just need some validation.