I'm going to be 60 next month and I've wanted...
I'm going to be 60 next month and I've wanted boobs ever since they were needed to hold up a swimsuit. I have learned all the tricks to camouflage the shape of the body so well that when I lost 30 lbs in 4 months this year NOBODY noticed! Not even my mother-in-law. I went from a size 14 to a size 6 people, and you can't tell? What is most noticeable are the reappearance of wrinkles on my neck and the complete disappearance of my barely B-cups - back to AA again! I put my measurements into the bra calculators online and they came up with an error message. Seriously?
Now the problem, I've brought the idea of getting breast augmentation up to my husband before, but just playfully. He's always said the pat response of a happy husband: "No, I like you the way you are." Great. It took me a couple of more months after more research to bring it up again (10-25-16), but this time more seriously. He just said "I thought we already decided no." (No, Honey, "we" didn't.) I told him I knew he liked me the way I am, but that my decision was "personal." He repeated that word, then ... nothing. I didn't prepare for silence! How can you overcome silence? I thought I would have to burst into tears and go through my litany of life experiences of living with embarrassment and self pity, but silence? He went back to reading, I went back to worrying about what he thought.
Someone on this site gave me some ideas to show him a photo of a body that looks like mine from here and show it to him. They also suggested wearing the sizing fillers around him so that he can get used to the new look. I'm healthy, 5-6" - 125 lbs - 36-28-34.5 I wear a 36A bra, anything smaller than 36 crushes my ribcage. I'm looking to have be 37-38" on top. Cup size is not the goal here, it's looking like a woman, not a boy.
I'm going to call and get a consultation set up so I need some more ideas to gently get my butt-man to be more excited becoming a boob-man! Maybe I should remind him that my cute rear-end is not going to evaporate?
Consultation with Doctor Nov. 7, 2016
I had my first consultation with Dr. Christa Clark in Folsom. She was very thorough and easy to talk to. She answered all my questions and I didn't feel nervous at all. I had a bit of a scare, though. On Thursday 4/10/2016, I took a mammogram in preparation for the consultation. The next day they called me to say they needed another set - they thought they might have seen something. I made the appointment for the next week on Wednesday, but went to the consultation with Dr. Clark. on Monday thinking that it would be nothing, but who knows?
TODAY: The new set of mammograms were clear! Yay! I can go forward and make a first prep appointment if I choose. I asked Dr. Clark how mammograms are performed on augmented breasts. She said they take 4 shots (what I did today) and that since the inserts are under the muscle, it pushes everything out and it is easier for the machine to see. That's good!
The office took a photo that constructed a 3D model of me and we tried out 300cc and 400cc. Hey, that looks pretty good! She said the model is smaller than the actual results, but to me the front view was a lot smaller than the sizers. She told me to make the rice sizers, but I was already way ahead on that by reading RealSelf. Both the Dr. and the assistant thought 325cc would be right, but I'm not so sure. She also said because of my wide chest, a 400 would be fine, too. She also said she can tuck in my too-long nipples and take off a mole on my ear for me! That would be great.
I've gotten my husband a bit more into it and I modeled the different rice sizers for him. I made 300, 325, 350, 375 & 400. We both seemed to like the 375 the best. At least in rice 325 was about the same as my regular padded bra makes me look.
That's it for now, I'll keep this updated.
Getting a Horse or Puppies?
When I first got up the nerve to bring it up, I told him that for my 60th birthday I was going to get myself something I've wanted since I was a kid, and he said, "A horse?" I had to think about that, do I want a horse or boobs? It's a toss up!
Quick update, last week I playfully called my breast augmentation "my new puppies" to my husband and he seemed really tickled with that! He said that he was sure they would get plenty of attention. Now I don't have to worry about bringing it up, I can use our code word "puppies" and it's all good.
My pre-op consultation will be December 20th and the operation will be January 6th, 2017 in my doctor's brand new facility.
Pre-op Appointment Down, 10 Days to Go!
My husband came to my pre-op appointment and all went well. My EKG looked good and I tried on a sizer. I had taken quite a bit of time in Kohl's trying on different sizes of bras with my 375cc rice sizers, so I got a good idea of what I wanted. Because my shoulders are wide and my chest is, too, I found that I wear either a 38C or D depending on what I want to look like.
What's with the chest measurements, anyway? the tape measure says I'm 32 in, but in bra comfort size I'm 38! Well, it will be nice to actually find bras in my size - in that whole huge department I only saw one "A" cup outside of the junior department, and it looked too big. I'm also sick of having the cups too close together for my chest. Who was the creep who decided that because you have small boobs that they are stuck in the front like headlamps?
I purchased an unlined bra to try on with the sizers in the office, and I'm glad I did. The assistant gave me 350cc sizer to try on and it looked just how I wanted it to. She said that you loose a bit into the chest, so that 385 to 405 would be right for me. The doctor agreed when she came in and looked at the photos that I had brought in for breast size examples, even giving 435 as a possibility. I don't have very much fat left after my weight loss, so using the examples from the office didn't help much in my implant size determination, I was smaller then them. The celebrity with the figure I like is said to be a 34C, so I'm hoping for a full C small D size. She said she will have the 385cc and 405cc available during the operation, so we shall see!
8 hours to go!
6 Jan 2017
Day of treatment
I've had my midnight snack and tomorrow and 8:30 I'll be at the office for my procedure. One more short consultation, a couple of hours for surgery and sleeping it off and I'll be back here with more boobs and less nipples! Wish me luck!
New Puppies for Underdog! Post-op day 1 & 2
It's done! The operation was successful, and after talking to the doctor and bringing in more photos of what I was considering for my outcome to be, my doctor decided she would try both 385 and 435cc Sientra smooth round moderate plus projection implants. I ended up with 435cc and they look really huge on top, but I know that this is typical. After the operation, people were telling me I had the vital signs of a 20 year old - pretty good for 60!
I took one of the muscle relaxers before getting into the car for the drive home, but that was it for the medications - just taking Tylenol Extra Strength. Really! I've got a good method for controlling pain and it really wasn't that bad. The worst was right when I was coming out of the anesthesia, it seemed like everything hurt and I couldn't tell where the pain was coming from. After that, if I can isolate where it is, it's easy to slow the pain. Because I didn't take any pain medication I haven't had any problems with constipation, but I'm not taking any chances and I do take the stool softener and use coconut oil.
After much debate on doing the nipple reduction at the same time, I told Dr. Clark about my worry about the pain of that plus the normal sensitivity and she said I could do it at a later time, no problem. It would just take a local, so no more anesthesia. I'm pretty sure that I could have handled the extra stitches, I was just being a chicken.
I started doing slow moving exercises to keep my muscles from tightening - lifting my arms and moving them normally - just very slowly. I watched "Hello Dolly" and found that her arm motions in the title song are perfect!
Day 3 - 50 Hours With the New Pups, and Passing Out
Well, I'm feeing pretty good! I've read where many people had the most pain on the 2nd or 3rd day, but I think because I've been doing slow stretches I have been able to minimize pain. I'm still moving in slow motion and I haven't tried pushing myself up with my arms, but I'm continuing to pull my arms behind my back and walking up the walls with my fingers, as mastectomy patients are told to do. This is a great way to get moving again. No bruising, no bleeding, Dr. Clark did a masterful job on me!
Yesterday I had my one day checkup and Dr. Clark says I'm absolutely textbook perfect. She showed my husband and I more photos of what to expect at 4 weeks and then in 4 months. She's very confident that I would look like her example. My stitches look great and she said I could take a shower Sunday.
I did pass out this morning, I was taking a shower at 4:30am because I was getting congested (note to self, don't have surgery during cold and flu season), just letting the water run on my back. I started getting dizzy, so I got out and sat on the toilet, then decided it would be better if I laid on the floor. The next thing I knew, my husband was picking me up! He got me back in bed and I promise I will never do that again!
I haven't taken any Tylenol since 4:30 am so I'm going to see how long I can go without. The constipation from the initial anesthesia let go, so the bloating is gone. No pain at all except a little pull reminder around the perimeter of my boobs - Yay!
Day 3 - 72 Hour Old Puppies (After BA)
This is so much better! I can lift my arms and move around without feeling any more than a little tug at the perimeter of the breasts. No more Tylenol, either. Now to wean myself off the stool softeners so I'll just take one today.
I slept so good last night! A straight 8 hours, which is unusual for me. Husband is happy, too - he's been so worried about me, especially after passing out. I got a nasty bruise on my left arm from that - I guess I laid down harder than I thought! My husband said I fell with style.
I put on one of my old t-shirts and, wow, does it look great! My measurements are now 37-28-36! This can't be me! My tummy is still a bit bloated, so I'm hoping that will go down soon. I'm looking forward to taking out the sutures this Friday as they do give a sharp pain and itch occasionally. My doctor did such a wonderful job, it doesn't need any dressings.
Even with all my precautions, I caught a minor cold that has settled in my chest, but even the coughing doesn't really hurt - just a little reminder tug. The most annoying pain is the ache in my back near the bottom of my shoulder blades, as if I pulled a muscle, and heat helps that.
Preparing For The Day of Surgery - What I did right and wrong
Before all is left in the dust of time, I want to write down what helped me through the surgery. I can't say this will work for everyone, it's just what worked for me. I had two children by the Bradley Method, totally natural, so even though it's been 25 years since my last child, the training in pain management stays with you forever.
THINGS I DID RIGHT:
1. Reading Realself and other websites and watching Youtube videos from women who have had the surgery to know what was coming and what to bring.
2. Brought ice packs in the car to use on the way home - I didn't hear about this one, but I'm really glad I did.
3. Packed snacks and brought saltines in case of nausea.
4. Pillow and blanket for the car - hey, it's January! This may be California, but you can't tell by the weather. Being cold makes muscles tense up and causes a lot of pain, so the faster you can get warm, the better.
5. Minimize the use of muscle relaxers and pain medication. I had everything there just in case I woke up in pain, but it just wasn't that bad. After the first muscle relaxer before leaving the office I took only Tylenol Extra Strength.
6. Immediately started stretches - moving my arms in normal ways, only very, very slowly, including reaching up and putting my arms on top of my head and behind my back. I was able to do my hair up again just 12 hours later. I did not want to get stiff.
7. Prevented constipation - I have a very slow metabolism so I was worried about this. The day before surgery I took a stool softener, then continued 2X a day using coconut oil, too. I had no problem with constipation. If you are interested in the coconut oil trick, ask me - it's not eaten, but works like a charm.
8. Wore a light-weight zip-up hoodie with jersey knit pajama pants. My doctor had me keep on the pants for surgery. Wore a warm scarf and coat.
9. Did not cry - I saw quite a few videos of women getting out of surgery crying and I did not want to be one of those! Instead, I had a great time talking to the recovery nurse, who turned out to be a childhood friend.
10. Have everything ready beforehand - the house was vacuumed, birds cleaned and I made a huge batch of chicken soup. Nothing better than homemade (with Mrs. Grass' help) chicken soup!
11. Have the baby monitor ready, I forgot this and had to direct my husband on where it was hidden and how to set it up, then he took it out too soon when I still needed it. Dudes just don't have the knack.
12. Tell husband no harmonica if I'm sleeping - I didn't do this, I regretted it .
13. Ice packs and covers ready - these were all stacked up ready to go, husband just had to switch them out.
14. Heating Pad - Have it ready to go, don't expect husband to know where it is.
15. Don't expect too much from husband, even though you just nursed him through four days of the worst flu he ever had, all the while trying to not breathe the same air. He won't notice that you are hungry unless you tell him, or know how to set up an area so you don't have to ask for the remote or which glasses you need for reading. These things are just not natural to most men, even if they are sweet and wonderful. They are their own special people and we need them for doing what they do best, loving us and sharing our lives for 30 years and hopefully for many, many more.
96 Hours After - Suture Panic and What I Wish I Had Done Before Surgery
At this time, the pain is completely gone from my chest. Yesterday evening, I had a lot of back pain around the bottoms of my shoulder blades radiating around to the front, but the pulling sensation is lessening and I'm trying to move quicker. Then came time to go to bed.
After doing so well with my recovery so far, I must have gotten a little careless and tried getting into bed the normal way. Huge mistake! The sutures on my right side, which feel a little deeper than the other side before this, felt like they were being torn out! I was stuck halfway on my side and couldn't move! I was afraid of tearing anything more and couldn't move at all. It was so painful! My poor husband didn't know what to do as I had woke him from a sound sleep. I really hate to have to direct, but I had to have him get me an ice pack. (He's already gone back to regular husband mode.) The pain subsided to nothing after that and there was no bleeding and everything looks fine the next day at the 96 hour mark. PHEW!
What I wish I had done beforehand:
1. Practice getting in and out of bed, chairs and the car without using my arms! This is much harder than it looks. Even schooching back into a deep chair is impossible. I tried everything, even the fulcrum method - holding my legs up in the air, hanging on to my thighs then bringing my legs down, or twisting off the bed to get my feet down before pulling my body up. Not fun and it makes me dizzy.
2. Ask for regular caps on prescription bottles - those childproof caps are impossible! Who knew how many muscles are involved in push and twist?
5 Day-old Puppies! Pain almost gone
Well, not much change in appearance, but the pain in my back is starting to subside. I can't wait until they get over this rectangular look, but the doctor says it will be over a month before that happens.
I don't know which is worse, the pain of wearing the medical bra, or going bra-less and having that back pain. Since the back pain is there either way, it's probably better being bra-less as I hate wearing bras. I put a temporary tattoo on one of the new pups, and a dragon over my big arm bruise that I got from passing out.
I'm looking forward to having the stitches out in 2 days, but not the procedure, which is going to hurt. My suture sites look great and I will be getting the Mederma cream for the scar as soon as I can. I'm still not going out today as I want to keep this cold from getting worse, or catching something else right now.
First Trip to Victoria's Secret with New Puppies!
Friday, January 13th, I got my stitches out. This didn't hurt a bit and I'm so relieved. The nurse practitioner that removed them, it turns out I knew her, too. That was embarrassing. What's with the plastic surgery industry? Why do I know so many people in it?
I've been back to driving for a couple of days and had no problems at all. The NP gave me some massages to do 3X a day - in and up pressure, no squeezing or pulling. She wasn't specific on what I was supposed to be achieving with this, but OK. She thought the size that Dr. Clark chose for me was absolutely perfect, so I'll just trust that this top bulges will be going down soon. She said that if this was the way that they stayed, nobody would get breast augmentations!
Dr. Clark's new office is beautiful, but still so new that there is masking tape all over and no art on the walls. I can't wait to see it after it's officially open. She is using other places to do her surgery until it's done.
The nurse gave me special tape to help heal the scars. She said it's the number one rated scar treatment, Moderma cream is #4. I can pick it up from the office whenever I need more tape. That's nice.
After going for a nice walk around town, I went to Victoria's Secret. The girl who measured me said I was a 34DD! "What? I ordered a C cup!" I said! I also told her that no way would I wear a 34 - I like 38s or 36s with an extender. I'm sick of having my chest squeezed by elastic that's too tight. It's like my mom always says about shoe sizes, "I'm a size six but sevens feel so good, I wear eights!" I ended up with 36C and it was nice and full, just like I wanted.
After telling her I was recently augmented, the little girl helping me said she really wanted one, too. Why? She said she was a C, but felt self-conscious. Well, just look where she was working! I told her she had no reason to feel bad and that she should wait until after she has kids. She was tiny and looked like she was prone to weight gain, so I think that she really shouldn't be made to feel bad about herself. I felt good about myself before, and I'll feel good about myself now, too. It's just a transition time.
Day 11 - Weird Bumps on My Scars - Is This Normal?
At my appointment last Friday, I was given some medicated tape that was supposed to help heal and reduce scarring. By the next evening, hard bumps had started to raise along the line, as if there were freshwater pearls in a string. Four bumps on the right side, three on the left. I put the tape back on, thinking that it might be temporary, but they haven't gone away. I took the tape completely off, but the bumps are still there. Has anyone else had this reaction or is this a normal healing thing? I've never had more than one or two stitches, so this is new. I got 2 regular stitches in my ear where my PS removed a mole, but that looks flat and nice. I will also put this question up on the board for the doctors to answer.
Post-op Boobie Blues
I guess this is normal, but I'm really worried about the size of my implants and the scars. I'm not crazy about the size, they look too big and I'm afraid they aren't going to look natural, even when they settle down. My muscles are so strong that it may take longer than normal, so I'm worried about not dropping properly. They don't look like boobs, they look like pecs, but I know that's normal and need to give it 4 months. I'm going without a bra most of the time to let gravity help out and doing the pushing in and down exercises that were recommended.
My scars are really painful when I do certain things - like get into bed. They feel like they are pulling on muscles. I have to push hard on them to relieve the pain and pressure, mostly on the right side. I'm trying to massage this out, but that hurts, too. Is this OK?
Overall, I'm happy I did it. My two daughters have been informed and they both said "congratulations," and don't seem too interested in asking questions, maybe they are afraid to ask. My husband loves my new boobs and thinks the size looks great on me. He thought I looked fine before, too, but he really likes them better now, I can tell. Maybe I'm just over-thinking this and should just forget about them.
Day 18 - Another Visit to Victoria's Secret Therapy! 34DD or 36D, for now.
After going to Victoria's Secret again, I'm feeling so much better. The lady who helped me assured me that my size was perfect for me, and that she would never have guessed that I was augmented. She said they see people in all stages and not to worry about being too big. She said most people are in love with how big they are on top and are later disappointed when things calm down. I tried on many bras and this time listened to her and used her recommendations. I got some soft bras that I can wear now and will get underwire later when I know my true size. Still hoping for full C/small D cup.
Week 3, Working Through the Ouchies!
I'm having trouble sleeping through the night. My incisions hurt at night, like they are being pulled and my nipples are stretching if I lay on my back. Sometimes I get really hard pulls that hurt quite a bit. I'm hoping that my teeny little, button sized areolas will turn into normal looking ones, but man, this hurts! It seems like it may take some of the extra nipple down with it, too.
Size Insecurity and Mental Adjustments
I know, I know, it's only been 4 weeks tomorrow. They haven't dropped, or even moved as far as I can tell. They still have that weird tell-tale round dent at the top and they seem really huge! Boob greed? No way! This isn't a competition on who has bigger ones, I just want the size that looks good on me. Well, I'm tired of trying to second guess myself, so I decided today to do something about it - change my attitude.
Everyone who I've told about it have been very supportive and complementary, but after going from boobs so small that the nipples stuck out farther than the tissue to being measured a 34DD, that really is a mental adjustment. Did I go to far? Should I have insisted on the 385cc? I went to the Sientra implant size chart and the difference between 385 and 435cc was so small as to be almost insignificant. Not worth worrying over. OK, next step.
Now a comparison of my before and after photos. I'm so glad I took a lot of before photos because after it's done you can't take any more, duh! I had taken my 385cc rice sizers to Kohls and took a photo with every bra I tried on, both C's and D's looked good. I was smart and bought an unpadded bra the size I thought I wanted to be (36C), then I brought it to the pre-op appointment and used it with the official sizer. This turned out to be more accurate because the bra the assistant brought in was thinly-padded and a size 34DD.
After looking at my photos, I think I'm on my way to getting the puppies I've always wanted. The aerolas are starting to stretch out a bit and are a nice color so they are looking better, too. I might not have to get the nipples done at all, so I'm glad I didn't do them, that would have been very painful with the stretching, too. I haven't lost any sensation in them, but they weren't very sensitive to begin with because I've always gone bra-less as much as possible. I'm still not wearing a bra very much and that's just the way it will be. They don't feel that much different unless I'm lifting something.
My husband, the admitted butt man, can't keep his hands off of the pups and wants to play with them a lot - that's OK with me. He is very supportive and tells me often that my body looks beautiful. This adjustment is something I will just work through and forget as time goes on as the new puppies become as much a part of me as the rest of me is.
One Month - What Size Am I Anyway? Average, Big or Humongous?
Ouchies almost gone at one month, still keep poking at it to make it hurt and trying to stretch out my areolas from the tiny buttons to something more attractive. Nursing two children 13 months each had no effect on them as the engorgement only lasted a week or so.
I decided to wait until things settle down to buy an expensive underwire bra, but I went to the thrift store and found a ton of brand new name brand bras for $5 each - that's my price. What size am I anyway? I found that I could fit in B, C, D and DD depending on the style. Before I couldn't even fit in an A I just bought 36B bras so padded that they could stand up on their own. Now I'm getting ones with no padding at all and it's WONDERFUL! They are so light, cool and sexy! A whole new world.
When I went to my first consultation, I told my doctor that I wanted to match my butt, 37". I'm now a 38-29-37, so close enough! Before I was 35-29-37 - a real stick person. I told her going in I wanted full C/small D.
I started to go to the bra calculators online to re-check my bra size. It was crazy. Where I used to get an error message, I'm at least getting a bra size now.
Band: 32, bust 37.5 or 38 inhaling
Third Love: 36C
Victoria Secret: 34DD or 36D in person, 32D online
Linda The Bra Lady: 34F/FF?? Wait a minute, you said DD/E before inhaling!
Bra Size Calculator.eu : 34DD (the best chart yet!)
Brasizecalculator.tk : 34DD (36D or 32F) great website, has tutorial
Soma: 36C (they didn't even have 38" as an option, just 38.5)
Kohl's: 32DDD/F/FF That's just nuts - now I know that means 34DD or 36D
According to the brasizecalculator.tk cup sizes are not static and they do not mean: A = Tiny, B = Small, C = Average, D = Big, DD = Humongous
Well, wasn't that educational?
5 Week Update - De-fluffing the top, waiting to drop
At 5 weeks, I'm still waiting for any sign of dropping. Did it happen and I missed it? I'm wondering now what I'm supposed to be looking for. The scars are still right where they were from the start, right at the crease at the bottom unless I lift my arms. I've been trying to stretch out the "tethering" that's happening mostly on my left side (see photo). The scars are a bit bumpy, but I think that will go down eventually.