Goodbye, asymmetric tuberous breasts!

So much has happened in the past year. Lots of changes. Not just in life, but in my breasts. I've tried to keep a positive attitude and maintain patience throughout this process but honestly, even after all the minor revisions I've had, I'm sad about my breasts. When I'm undressed they look like slightly larger versions of the same lopsided embarrassing breasts I had before. Between all the issues with stitches and traveling back for revisions and waiting for incisions to heal and pain to go away I never had a chance to be intimate with a partner and feel good about my body... And now that I'm healed, the swelling has gone down, and i am again stuck with ugly breasts.
My left breasts is hard with a very low nipple. My right breast shows no evidence of a lift. It looks like it's just sliding off bc the implant. I feel ugly, stupid, and humiliated. I don't know why so many women got beautiful results and I look like this. It's just sad. Anyway, we're in a global pandemic, so I guess self esteem isn't important or whatever.
I contacted the doctor today, it's been about two months since I last went in to try and get the huge dent out of my breast. I'm waiting to hear back what my next steps are.
I'm too bummed to take many pictures, but here are the ones I sent to the surgeon.

This whole thing basically walked itself out of the spot I wrote about the other day. 2 inches of dissolvable whatever. I honestly thought maybe they used the wrong material on me because this looks like any old fishing line but when I put ant forever to it, it just broke off. So better big long pieces like this then things of tiny fragments also trying to escape. This stuff drives me nuts. Xc

Today when I got out the shower I saw that I had a bubble on my left breast near that dark bruise looking mark. I rubbed at it, the skin peeled back, and pus and blood, my old friends, came back for a visit. After a squeezing out quite a bit of fluids, I taped some gauze down and kept it covered. It want painful or shocking this time. I don't think it is infected, but I sent an email just in case. I thought the stitch was gone but it's not, so whenever the pathway to the surface gets skin growing over it it's a problem. I'm going to talk with him about this soon. I never need to use this type of stitch again! So you can see what I'm looking like lately and the reoccurring small hole on my left breast. I have similar areas on my right side where I don't put Mederma. Anyway, I am not shocked but it was nice while the break lasted. This was more compared to what's happened before, but I've never heard so much drainage.