I can't believe I AM implant free. - Beverly Hills, CA

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I am 46 years old and I have spent half my life...

I am 46 years old and I have spent half my life raising my 4 children. Now, 2 of them are away in college and the other 2 are not far behind them. I feel that it's time to work on my appearance and pursue my dreams before getting much older. I feel that by fixing my appearance, I'll have the confidence to go after my personal goals with gusto and have a better chance at making them come true. Maybe I'm just a dreamer... but I've got to try. I only live once.

I am and always have been, very insecure about my appearance. At 24, after having breastfed my first two children, I got my first set of implants. I went from 32AA to 34C. They looked great, no visible scars - just very pretty. However, since the implants were placed above muscle, the rippling of the implant shell began showing on my chest. So, at 29, I got my second pair, together with liposuction of the abdomen. The results were not good. Scars, dimples, asymmetry, complications, the works! I don't even want to go into details. It was bad. My crime, insecurity. My punishment, ugly... and I'm reminded of it every time I look in the mirror. No CC or rupture though, thank goodness.

I started perusing this site researching the latest liposuction, breast revision, explantation, breast lift, facelift, and neck lift procedures. Not looking to make changes to my look, just wanting a more youthful appearance. I had consultations with several PSs all over CA. For the breasts, I've been mulling over whether to explant or replace - all the doctors suggesting replace, of course. I definitely want to explant for health reasons but, at the same time, I want to keep my curvy silhouette - at least for a few more years while I'm still young looking. So now, I'm leaning more towards replacing and then, explanting in 2-3 years. And it's not because I don't like the results of the other women who have explanted. In fact, I actually think they look great au naturel. I love the way women look with natural breasts - small, big, low, high. It's all good! However, I am just not confident that I'll have such luck and look as well. I still may explant because I sooo want soft breasts that are just me and only me. I know that bad results in facelifts and liposuction are common too, I did months of research and I'm pretty confident with the PS I found. He does amazingly natural looking facelifts (hope so in my case, as well). As for the lipo, my mid-section looks bad already from age, weight gain, and oh, the botched lipo, too. I don't expect that I'll be wearing a lot of bikinis but I do expect to get a more defined waist so I'll look better in clothes. I have a second consultation with my doctor scheduled for October 16th, which is when I'll give him my final decisions on exactly what procedures he will be performing on me. My surgery is tentatively scheduled for October 29th.

Maybe I'll post before pictures - maybe.

Today I'm leaning more towards explanting because...

Today I'm leaning more towards explanting because I'm feeling brave about the outcome. I'm nervous about the consultation with my doctor tomorrow.

Felt nervous as heck this morning. Feel as though...

Felt nervous as heck this morning. Feel as though I need more time to mull this explant/implant thing some more. Called to reschedule my appointment but nothing is available until November 1. That pushes my intended surgery date back more. I'm leaning more towards explanting at this point. The only thing keeping me from making a definitive decisionright now is my fear of looking deformed if i don't heal attractively. I'm hoping that the doctor can do an internal lift when he does the lift.

Went to my second consultation with my PS...

Went to my second consultation with my PS yesterday. I was so nervous, I didn't sleep the night before. For some odd, mystical, psychological reason, I felt guilty for not wanting to re-implant. I fumbled around as I told him that i didn't want implants anymore and when I told him, I was ever so relieved when he didn't even flinch as he continued our consultation, now addressing the matter of how to achieve the best aesthetic results without implants. I am getting a bunch of other stuff done too as I mentioned in my previous post. The reason that I'm doing this is because I'm not getting any younger. I spent my younger years raising a family alone. It was hard and the wear shows on my face and body. I still feel young in mind but I don't look young at all. This is what I feel I must fix now. I hope I'm not making a mistake. Yet I trust that my PS knows exactly what he's talking about. He is sooo nice and I have such a crush on him lol. I'm very VERY nervous about surgery day. I can't wait also. I won't sleep for the next 12 days. The countdown starts!

I'm scared but sooooo excited! Come on Tuesday,...

I'm scared but sooooo excited! Come on Tuesday, hurry! x

Okay, I'm going into town tomorrow to stay at a...

okay, I'm going into town tomorrow to stay at a hotel in Beverly hills. My surgery is Tuesday morning at 7 am. I have taken last pictures of myself and I'm ready for the big day. I may muster enough confidence but most likely not. Bye till after surgery!

Checked into my beautiful allergen free hotel room...

Checked into my beautiful allergen free hotel room in Beverly hills last night. Got dinner from Whole Foods last night. Everything was great! I was scared as hell yesterday but it teeter totters between scared and excited so right now I'm excited. The doctor called me last night, his nurse called me yesterday afternoon, his office staff called me yesterday morning. My doctor's voice last night was so soothing and made me feel that everything was going to be A-ok! The only thing I'm uncomfortable with right now is that I am Soooo thirsty! Can't wait too drink water..:( On another note, this doctor and his staff have been impressing me very well. The doctor's name - I'll tell after I see my results ;)

.I kinda look like I was in a plane crash. I have...

.I kinda look like I was in a plane crash. I have drain pods all over me. I decided at the last minute to transfer fat into my butt too and I expected it to feel horrible but I hardly feel it. I even had him put a little bittty fat into my lip too. The nurse said that this is going to be an excellent year for me. That made me feel great, because I could really use a great year for once. The vicodin are working great. I felt nauseous this morning and threw up but it's fine. I'm already able to walk around a bit. My middle is svelte now. I have a waist! I can't wait to see my implant free boobies. I have normal boobies! Yay!

I'm feeling fine and I'm implant free! I love my...

I'm feeling fine and I'm implant free! I love my flat chest. The doctor gave me a lift and although we talked about injecting fat into my breasts, it didn't happen as he said that there was no space to do so. I have had a lot of work done and i don't regret it! I'm going to gave an amazing year. I tried to post pics on here but i can't. It gives the option to post photos and video from YouTube but i can't click on the photo option.

All this is too much on my body. It's very rough....

All this is too much on my body. It's very rough. You've got to be a very strong person to endure all this trauma to the body. . I don't think that I'll ever have surgery again electively. Wow! What a journey! Still no pictures up although i have been keeping a daily photo journal. Perhaps I'll post them later when I'm feeling better.

Just had my 8th day post op appointment. Got all...

Just had my 8th day post op appointment. Got all the stitches removed. Must say, i feel much better now. Since I've been through a rather large surgery, been having regrets since the healing process is so rough. I was so focused on explanting and liposuction that i didn't realize that the facelift and necklift were such big deals also. Well, it was really rough but i am finally seeing good things happening to my face. It's healing! And i LOVE my implant free breasts!

Here's some more pictures. These are front torso...

Here's some more pictures. These are front torso shots before and after. The before pic was taken on 11 12 12 and the after pic was taken today. I've run out of the pain meds and although I feel pain everywhere on my body, it's withstandable.

The only good thing so far is that I am implant free.

The only good thing so far is that I am implant free.
Name not provided

I've known about him for many years even when I was researching for my second surgery. I didn't go to him because I thought, for some reason, that I wouldn't be able to afford him. This time, I guess I chose him mostly because he does great faces. I figured if I'm going to get a bunch of work done at the same time, I better choose a PS who does great faces. His before & afters for breasts and lipo were all pretty good too. He uses the Smart Lipo and does the donut incision (Benelli) lift, as well. Everything I was looking for. I guess we'll see just how good he is. At the other offices I consulted with, the doctors were aloof, rushed, untrustworthy, and one in particular, extremely UN-genuine. However, I felt very comfortable at my doctor's office.

3 out of 5 stars Overall rating
3 out of 5 stars Doctor's bedside manner
3 out of 5 stars Answered my questions
1 out of 5 stars After care follow-up
2 out of 5 stars Time spent with me
2 out of 5 stars Phone or email responsiveness
4 out of 5 stars Staff professionalism & courtesy
1 out of 5 stars Payment process
5 out of 5 stars Wait times
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