38 Years Old, Breastfed 2, Both C Sections, Athletic but No Boobs

I've been scouring this site for so long and just like many others I decided to write a review. My boobs were originally 34A but after nursing two children, my boobs are flatter than an A cup. Looking to implant 300 ccs of Allergen silicone implants with Dr. Cohen at Belcara in Maryland. We'll see..

Thought I would try on my two favorite pre-baby bikinis. I loved these two when I had a flat stomach and a little less thighs. I actually didn't mind having small chest when they looked a little muscular. The muscle would appear as cleavage. Now I have diastatis, multiple c section scars and thighs with a lot of cellulite. My goal is to exercise my way back to shape and buy the breast that exercise won't get me. I'm hoping larger breasts will balance my body but I also want to still look somewhat athletic. I strongly considered getting a tummy tuck but that was another $7,000 and I can't afford or justify it right now. I have uterine fibroids and don't want to do a TT until they are gone. I'll probably have more loose skin once the fibroids are removed or shrank. I would like to be a full B, small C cup.

On another note, my husband and I aren't doing well right now. He said he is fine with my decision and will drop me to the center and pick me up, but I'm very saddened that he's not very engaged in this process. We have two small children and he plans to help me in the evenings after surgery but I'm afraid I'll need more help than I think.

I want this for me so I'm preparing to just do it and deal with the aftermath as I can.

Well just a few more days until my procedure and I have serious nausea and anxiety. Some days I think, what the heck am I doing to my body and other days I can't wait to love my breast for once.

I went in for another sizing yesterday and am very certain I want 300 ccs. I was considering going a little smaller so that I don't look too curvey. I think I will be fine. My surgeon does like permission to go a little above or below to give you the look you want but I'm too chicken to give that permission. I want to be the only one to blame if I don't like the outcome. Ha!

So I have a one year old and am wondering how you prepared to care for small children post surgery?? My husband has to work long days and my nanny only works until 4. I won't be able to lift my baby, what will I do? When can I expect to be able to lift my baby again who is 20 lbs.