Explant after 30 years of implants

I have no agenda to talk other women out of getting breast implants. I know that many women are very pleased with them and I'm glad they have had good luck. But for me, getting breast implants was one of the worst decisions I ever made. I have had two expensive surgeries with multiple complications that have been painful, embarrassing, and distressing. Now I have a rare complication that I never expected (had never even heard of) and will soon have a third - but final - surgery.
My first BA was in the early 90's pre-Internet so there was nowhere to get advice or information and I just did it impulsively with the first surgeon I went to. I was depressed from a failed relationship with an unfaithful boyfriend and I was insecure from a lifetime of teasing and insensitive comments about my flat chest. I weighed around 100 pds and had almost no breast tissue - no bras fit me, I was 32AA or even AAA. Though I was athletic and muscular I was filled with self-loathing about my body and I thought that implants were a simple fix. I only told a couple friends, borrowed the money and scheduled the surgery. I did not read the fine print and I never considered what this decision would mean over a lifetime.
I had complications from the get go - after surgery my whole chest was completely numb. I eventually got some feeling back along the sides of my breasts but all these years later, between my breasts and my nipples are still mostly numb. I am aware of touch but it's not pleasant. A year or so after getting implants I developed capsular contracture which grew increasingly worse over the years. I did not have the money for revision and I was terrified of another surgery so I just lived with it. Finally, three years ago I was able to afford revision. My surgeon told me I had Grade IV capsular contracture and would need capsulectomy and either implant exchange or explant. I didn't even consider explant and decided to have smaller 270cc replacement implants. I felt certain that all would be great the second time around. Afterwards, I was generally happy with my results, My breasts were definitely softer and though not perfect, more normal looking. I had a lot of rippling but accepted it. Then, a few weeks after surgery I noticed a strange thing - under my right breast the implant formed a point under the skin. I could push it up into place with my finger but then it would just pop back out. I tried taping it for a week or so but it didn't help. I went back to my surgeon who didn't say much about it except "hmmm, that's odd". I am not a pushy person and I decided that they were so much better I had no reason to complain and I should just be satisfied.
Then recently, the spot became painful and more visible. My previous surgeon had retired so I finally went to another surgeon to see what could be done to fix it. He examined me and I was totally shocked when he told me the skin has thinned and weakened so much that it will eventually split and the implant will come out - a rare complication called extrusion. If I don't take care of it, I could end up in the ER with someone with no plastic surgery experience doing an explant. I had no idea that this was a serious complication, I just thought it was a cosmetic problem! He also told me I have capsular contracture again. I thought they were firmer than they should be but I had tried to convince myself I was imagining things. I was in denial, I just could not face it - cc again! He told me I can have a capsulotomy and replace the implants or explant, but that which ever I decide, it needs to happen sooner rather than later. I walked out in a daze, sat in my car in the parking lot and cried.
Now I have a thick gauze pad taped over the weak spot while I get a second consult.
I have already decided to explant. I'm done with implants. My body just does not want them. I am so tired of having expensive self-induced medical problems. I must admit, I am very afraid of looking freakish and grotesque without the implants. To make things worse, my husband and I are talking of separating. Adding an unexpected potentially emotionally devastating medical procedure to the mix is incredibly stressful. I haven't even told him yet that I am having them out. He was not supportive when I talked of explant in the past. I worry he will be repulsed by how I look and that will be the end of our marriage. I worry about feeling self-conscious at work and at the gym - only a handful of people know I have implants. But I realize that I must focus on being healthy and not on what other people think. Age has helped with that. Now that I have decided, I am very anxious to have them out but I am going to take my time and make sure to chose a surgeon I trust. I have another consult on the 23rd of this month. I am on a call list for cancellations so hope it may be sooner. I will continue to share my progress and appreciate all positive thoughts!

Told my husband about my consult and the extrusion risk and capsular contraction. That I've made up my mind to explant with no new implants. When we talked about it a few years ago I asked if he would still be attracted to me with them out and he said "I don't know". Now when I told him they are coming out for good he said he thinks it's the right thing to do - but nothing else. I asked if he could please reassure me and tell me he'd still love me no matter how it looks but he didn't. I even asked if he could just lie (pathetic I know). He hugged me with what felt like pity but silence and I just walked away feeling sad and alone. 20 years together. We've had trouble for a while and there was another woman. Which I forgave and have tried to forget. We are in therapy and I thought it was helping... I had really hoped for more compassion. Broke my heart but I have to love myself enough to do it and be brave.

So the first surgeon I saw about explant said he would do it with local only - injecting I guess Lidocaine? I thought they would do it under twilight, like they use for colonoscopy but it seems that most PS use local only. I do understand the risk of general anesthesia and that it should be avoided if possible. Everyone says it doesn't hurt but what is the experience like mentally? I can picture looking down at him pulling these bloody bags out and my boobs deflating and having a full blown anxiety attack. Do they block your view of the surgery? Did the PS describe what s/he was doing as they removed them?