36 Old Mom of Two, Wanting my Full Perky Girls Back - Alpharetta, GA

I have to tell you ladies.. When I joined RS I never intended on posting anything.. I've never even commented on a post. I hope I'm not alone in this, but I joined just to read reviews and gain my dream boob pic. Which I did.. Thanks ladies! :-) Well, all that changed today at my consult appointment. Now, I freaked out and I feel as if I have no where else to turn. My family just wouldn't get it. I come from a family if large breasted women, my mom being the biggest, who after years of trying just got a reduction due to back and neck problems. She had many, many complications with her surgery and had a rough recovery. Much of which was due to age and medical history. So here I turn, to a community of women who are hopefully like minded or have been in a similar situation.

As for a little backstory. I'm 36, mother of 2, 15 and 7. I'm currently 5'3 112, give or take a few depending on the week. My weight from teen to now has always fluctuated between here and 140, that being the heaviest, usually staying at the 120 range. I've now been at the current weight for the past 6 months. This has been my goal weight.. I feel incredibly healthy and confident with my weight.. with that weight loss has come some negative side effects. I now have the smallest boobs of my entire life. I've never hated my boobs.. they were always at a 34 c to 34 d, which I could deal with. Were they ideal or perfect, no. But I was ok. I'm now at the point where I'm very unhappy with my body image. I just want to feel womanly again and fel a BA is my only option.

So.. as to why I'm posting. I went today for my first consult and left feeling a bit confused. I went in set on the type of implant I wanted. I felt I wanted saline... mainly because of the health factor and the overall longterm result. I went to the appointment with tons of pictures, like 54 to be exact (probably too many) I've been on RS far too much. Anyway, my PS was very patient and thorough and asked great questions that made me feel at ease and let me know he was concerned about how I wanted to feel once it was all done. After measurements we viewed my many pictures which had quite a large range, in size and age and stature of the woman with them. He helped me narrow in on what was my favorite and why. He then went into my current breasts and how i was borderline on needing a lift. As i said i was set on getting saline. He gently told me that wasn't going to be the best move for my BA. He explained the factors that played into that. I) I'm petite and thin, 2) I have sagging and loose thin skin from having larger boobs before, 3) I want full perky, semi natural breasts. He suggested that i go with a Mentor silicone implant. When we finished our Q&A I worked with the Nurse to try on sizers. The sizers were at the doctors recommendations, based on my current breast size and the goal size based on pictures.

I was 100% good until this point. when I got here I froze.. the doctor didn't tell me the sizes I was trying just said i could go up or down. Because I was alone and how I currently feel.. anything looked big. So i really just tried on two sizes. I too pictures in the sizes in my own shirt left feeling like I was Ok. After I got home I started looking, and looking at RS profiles and wondered was that big enough.. The biggest regret I see is that they had wished they had went bigger. I'm going to post pictures below of my current breast, dream boobs and the in office sizers. The sizers are 375cc and 400cc Mentor silicone.

What I hope to get from you ladies is an honest opinion and help on if the in office sizers can be trusted and if so, do they look like a good size to match what my dream boobs are.

Thanks in advance and I can't believe I'm actually doing this.. As I said I would never.. I'm far too shy. That being said.. I'm putting it out there and so needing advice. Thanks in advance for all of you who take the time to read and hopefully respond.

Today was surgery day! I arrived at 6:30 am. Wow.. So early. I was partly grateful to be the first surgery and thankful I didn't have to wait half a day to no be able to eat or drink. I tend to get sick to my stomach when I don't eat!

My PS came in after they have me my calming meds.. I'm pretty sensitive to meds so that had me pretty out of it. Almost like I was tripping and seeing things move that shouldn't lol. When my PS got there he marked me, then they shipped to the OR room. My PS does everything outpatient in his office. It was amazing to have to arrive at a cold Hospital. He and his staff were so comforting. At my last pre op I was with my fiancé and we decided to see if we could go with 425cc. The nurse forwarded me that due to how petite I was it may not happen, but he would try to get me there. Well, he did and now I may be regretting it. I'm so sore! I guess that's normal, but I've been in a good amount of pain and have been propped up in bed sleeping, icing myself with frozen pees. Which has greatly helped. I've taken a my pain meds twice, but they really put me out. I woke up and my honey had made me dinner. I ate and am now watching RHOBH feeling much better than I was. With the exception of how the girls look. It's scary and I've shed a few tears. The rational
Part of me believe what my PS said about them changing, but the emotional side of me things I've made a huge mistake!

I've been crying for the last 30 minutes because I just found my Mentor card letting me know what they put in. I originally wanted HP, but my PS and I settled on M+.. I just found out he used the classic moderate profile.. I'm so upset and scared that it's not going to the result I want. So many emotions right now. I wished I would have just left well enough alone and not even done this.