Is the decision process for a tummy tuck or mommy makeover an emotional roller coaster for everyone?

been wanting a MM for 3 years - have 3 babies all c section. I struggle from fear of dying, complications, being judged, leaving my kids behind, recovery, etc. I'm the type to do a lot of research. I've had one consult and will have more. Felt ready but Then I go back down the roller coaster. I esp want the tummy tuck and now want the breast implant too. Lots of feelings of guilt, vanity, self-centeredness. I'm not a flaunt it type of person. How do patients deal with this?

Doctor Answers 10

Is the decision process for a tummy tuck or mommy makeover an emotional roller coaster for everyone?

Thank you for your question. It would be quite unnatural to not have some anxiety and feelings of guilt about an impending elective surgery, but i applaud you for reaching out for reassurance. Be confidant that you have made the right decision for you and you alone. Entering surgery with a positive mindset will make the recovery that much easier. The majority of patients do quite well with a mommy makeover, and if there were questions about your ability to have the surgery performed, your physician would have discussed these with you. Remain at ease and enjoy the process!

Atlanta Plastic Surgeon
5.0 out of 5 stars 38 reviews

Your Emotional Roller Coaster

Thank you for your question.I'm so sorry that you're dealing with these difficult emotions in your decision to have a #mommymakeover.  The decision to have any elective #surgery is difficult for every patient.  What you're feeling is normal.  While having a mommy makeover to help you regain your pre-baby body, you may find you also regain some youthful self-confidence and more pride in your appearance.  Have more consultations to decide if this surgery is right for you.  Do not let feelings of guilt stop you from scheduling an operation.  It is your body and your decision.Just make sure to pick a #boardcertified plastic surgeon for the best results and the safest procedure.

Jed H. Horowitz, MD, FACS
Orange County Plastic Surgeon
5.0 out of 5 stars 94 reviews

Pre-op Considerations with a Mommy Makeover in Melbourne, FL.

Thanks for your question regarding the personal considerations for a tummy tuck or a Mommy Makeover.  I would say that what you are feeling is very common amongst patients and can most likely be significantly alleviated with a discussion in detail with your board-certified plastic surgeon.  Be sure to tell your surgeon all of your pre- and postop thoughts and considerations so that they can most appropriately advise you on how best to proceed.  I hope this information is helpful to you.  Best of luck!

Amy Ortega, MD
Melbourne Plastic Surgeon
5.0 out of 5 stars 28 reviews

Is the decision process for a tummy tuck or mommy makeover an emotional roller coaster for everyone?

It is common for young Moms to have these feelings. Surgery can be frightening because it's not something you do every day. I asked an anesthesiologist how he would answer this question and he said to put it in terms of an everyday activity of yours, you are statistically 50 times more likely to die in your car than in the OR if you are of good health. It is also important to be smart with your funds. This is not the money that pays the rent or college tuition, but rather should be money that you would otherwise spend on something not critically necessary, like a vacation that you give up. I hope this helps. 

Ronald V. DeMars, MD
Portland Plastic Surgeon
5.0 out of 5 stars 24 reviews

Mommy makeover, Abdominoplasty, Mastopexy, Breast Augmentation

Thank-you for having the insight to ask this question.  Yes, this is a universal feeling.  Speak to your Board Certified Plastic Surgeon who is trained to do these procedures in a training program designed to train Plastic Surgeons.  Your surgeon will be able to discuss your risks of this procedure and will be able to give you names of his patients that are willing to discuss their journey with you.  Good luck!

Saira Saini, MD
Fayetteville Plastic Surgeon
5.0 out of 5 stars 3 reviews

Anxious Before Surgery

Thank you for your question. Your are not alone. Many patients feel like they are on an emotional roller coaster  before contemplating surgery. It is important to feel comfortable and  develop a trusting relationship with your surgeon. Discuss your feelings with him/her. They should be able to put you at ease if you share your concerns. Always use a Board Certified Plastic Surgeon.

Decision making

Hello and thank you for your question. Many patients feel the exact same way as you--you are not alone.  One thing which can help a lot is finding a surgeon who you can develop a comfortable and trusting relationship with.  It is very important that you thoroughly research your surgeon before committing to surgery. It is a good idea to research your surgeon's educational background, online reviews, before & after pictures, and speak with anyone who you may know who has had surgery with that surgeon. During your consultation, make sure that you don't feel rushed and make sure that you have adequate time with your surgeon and not just their patient coordinator or nurses. If the majority of your consultation is spent with someone other than the surgeon, this is usually not a good sign. The most important aspect is to find a surgeon you are comfortable with. I recommend that you seek consultation with a qualified board-certified expert surgeon who can evaluate you in person.

Best wishes and good luck.

Richard G. Reish, M.D.
Harvard-trained plastic surgeon

Richard G. Reish, MD
New York Plastic Surgeon
5.0 out of 5 stars 67 reviews

Mommy make-over - finding the decision hard

Thank you for asking about your mommy make-over.
  • Your struggles do not sound like a surgical decision -
  • it sounds as though now, or in the past, or both you have been made to feel of little value.
  • Restoring your body after having babies gives you a properly functioning body again. 
  • It is not vain - there is no way except surgery to repair your body core support.
  • If you can afford it and still provide for your children, there is nothing to feel guilty about.
  • You set your children a good example by showing that you are entitled to care for yourself as well as them. 
  • If the decision is still hard, I suggest you get counseling to understand why these feelings so overwhelm you that you cannot take these steps to meet your personal needs
Always see a Board Certified Plastic Surgeon. Best wishes  - Elizabeth Morgan MD PHD FACS


It is very common for women to go through the emotions you are experiencing.  Talk to your surgeon about these feelings.  They are important.  He/She may have previous patients who would be willing to share their experiences with you to help ease your mind.  Talk with your surgeon about how risk is minimized, how implant sizes are selected, etc to help ease your mind.  The bottom line is, you need not feel guilty about any of it.  You are a worthy person and there is no crime in feeling good about yourself!

Camille Cash, MD
Houston Plastic Surgeon
5.0 out of 5 stars 28 reviews

Emotional roller coaster of mommy makeover

Having conflicting feelings, as well as emotional highs and lows, as you move through the decision-making process surrounding this type of procedure is normal.  To me, it means you are a thoughtful and perspicacious person.  It is especially emotional when you also have all of the day-to-day juggling, "doing," and "going" that is typical of motherhood during the early years.  And then on top of that full-time job (inside the home, outside the home, both places perhaps), you have to make time to really think about all of the aspects of a mommy makeover.  It is one of the most universally happy combination of procedures that I perform (although, almost always including a tummy tuck).  These are surgical procedures, so you have to give it serious contemplation.  My best advice is to seek out a board-certified plastic surgeon, who has experience with all of the procedures you are considering, and with whom you develop a rapport that is mutually supportive and re-assuring so that you can speak freely about what you are experiencing in terms of emotions.  And also make sure you have a good feeling about the nurses and front office staff, as you will also be drawing upon their support and knowledge before and after your procedures.  Best of luck in making your decisions, moving forward with these procedures if you decide they are right for you, and obtaining a beautiful result!

These answers are for educational purposes and should not be relied upon as a substitute for medical advice you may receive from your physician. If you have a medical emergency, please call 911. These answers do not constitute or initiate a patient/doctor relationship.