I had voluma injected into my cheeks in October. I really hated the effect and felt very self-conscious. I had only ever had a little restylane around the eye area before and a bit of botox and this had worked really well, and kept me looking youthful, I had lots of compliments about the way I looked and felt very confident. The Voluma in my cheeks however, looked really artifical and like I'd had something done, I've always had big cheeks and this just made them look worse. It also made my face look more asymmetrical than before. In January I went to an Occulaplastic surgeon and got it dissolved in one go. I did feel there was more left in my face as my face looked odd and older. A week later I went back to the surgeon who had dissolved the product for a review. After giving me a very depressing lecture on how my face was aging, she suggested a thread lift. I wasn't blown away with the idea of a thread lift,the reviews I'd read were dodgy and way too invasive for me. Instead I went back to my old doctor who aside from the disaster with the voluma had always been very good. I asked her if she could do the restylane again around my eye area. Whether it was a misunderstanding or some other reason, she put the voluma back into the same place (the apple of my cheek). I was mortified. I had spent time before the procedure going through with her where I wanted the filler and she seemed to have completely ignored what I'd said. When I questioned her she said it was the right product for the job. At this point her secretary showed another patient into her office and I was shown out. I didn't know what to do, I went home and on seeing my husband burst into tears. He was very comforting but angry with me for messing around with my face. I noticed that my face recovered quickly from the hyaluronidase, which I'm certain was on account of the voluma. However it was still not what I wanted and I was as self-conscious as ever.In April I went to see another doctor who specialised in HRT and fillers hoping that the combination might help me start to feel better. He suggested a little filler on the cheekbones at the sides of my face to give my face a lift and flatten the cheeks. I thought this was a good idea and would avoid any more damage to my face with the hyalase. He suggested using voluma again. I was a little worried about this, but he reasurred me by telling me he would only use a small amount. Shortly after discussing this with him I was told the news that my Mother had terminal cancer. I went ahead with his suggestion in the hope that looking better might make me feel better. It was the single worst decision i could have made.The result was awful, my face swelled up worse than ever before, my face looked wider and my eyes looked odd. The filler drew lots of fluid into my face and my face felt really hot to the touch. While this was happening my mother committed suicide. The day after she died I had the filler dissolved.Loosing my Mother was utterly devastating and seemed heightened by what was going on with my face. It was a week after I had the filler injected that I had it dissolved. The doctor injected hyalase into my upper cheeks, eye troth and some of the sides of my face. I wanted to get rid of all the filler but the doctor felt it would be best to just take out what she felt needed to go. Afterwards I noticed deep ridges around my eyes that hadn't been there before, My face looked as though it had aged and my skin felt lax. I went back to the doctor a week later for a review, she examined my face and told me she felt the hyalase had worked well. I mentioned restylane around the eye area and she said to wait for many months to see how I felt. She said she'd be happy to see me when I was ready. I felt too self-conscious to wait several months,I felt that if I could sort out how I looked on the outside it would help me to feel better on the inside. I contacted an organisation called Face Save for advice and they adviced going back to my old doctor who knew the look I liked and seeing what she would suggest. So a month after the hyalase and despite all that had happened, I went back to see her. She used a bit more hyalase to break down the filler around the sides of my face and then a week later used restylane around the eye area. The result was a small improvement, but the skin was very lax and still sagged which pulled the filler down. She thought I might need more filler but I decided it would be best to just leave it alone. I can see where the pieces of filler are when I look in the mirror which isn't great but at least I look less tired.Last week I went to see a top plastic surgeon who specialises in reconstruction and he advised a Mid-face lift. He said he sees lots of women like me who feel they have had their faces damaged by these products. He said hyalase is not suppose to damage the skin but he believes it does. He said he thinks that fillers age the skin quicker and are not a good option. He examined my face and said I looked normal and that the fillers were all fine. He said that in eighteen months time my face would go back to normal, and I should come back to see him then, He said he didn't want to try to remove the rest of the filler incase of infection and that it would be best to allow it to break down naturally over time. He said I would be fine and to promise him not to use any more fillers. I had thought about face lifts in the past, but considered it as something I might do in my mid to late 50s. I am 49 and realise I am going to need to bring this closer. I thank God this didn't happen to me when I was younger. The thought that this can be put right with a face lift in 18 months time gives me hope, though I'm afraid of what I'm going to look like after the fillers have all dissolved. At the moment I am interviewing plastic surgeons to decide who would be the best for me, it feels very risky but the option of staying like this and looking worse and worse as the years go by doesn't feel like a good option. I would love to hear from someone who has been through something similar.