I am right side affected with Poland Syndrome, which means I am missing my major pec muscle. My initial procedures were done in my home province of Nova Scotia, Canada - hence the location. I now reside in Alberta, Canada and will be getting all future surgeries here.
Almost 11 years ago this year, I went through the process of getting a breast reduction on my unaffected side, then 6 months later an implant to match up with the other side. I went from a DD to a C cup on my unaffected side, and a small A to a C on affected side.
This was all fine and dandy, but now... I have started the process to possibly get a breast EXPLANT and a reduction on both breasts. After several life changes (weight gain/loss, pregnancy) over the past 11 years, I am back to a DD, possibly a DDD cup. I have possible capsular contracture, and several issues that I have had as far back as I can remember. I don't know if this is related, but I DO know that I want all foreign objects out of my body.
I didn't choose this life. I was only 17/18 when I had the surgeries, and I made this choice with my parents so I could have a more "normal" adult life. What I am doing is not for everyone, but I feel like right now this my BEST option for my health and for my sanity.
I am scared as hell and I have no idea what the rest of 2018 is going to bring me. Going through surgery again and recovery is terrifying. But I DO know that I am going to DO THIS SH*T and plan to embrace the heck out of whatever happens.
My worth is not in my breasts, no matter how big or how small.
Updated on 3 Apr 2018:
Since I have started the process of actually trying to get something done about my boob problem... I am really noticing how much they get in my way. If I could have this surgery tomorrow I freaking would.
My sports bra digs into my shoulders and cardio workouts are not fun at all when you are constantly readjusting straps and fixing your boobs so the sweat doesn't pool in the middle and they kind-of-sort-of-not-really stay in place. EVEN with a 'high impact' sports bra. Just for once I would love to do a workout with weights where I can do upper body work without my side boob getting in the way.
Ugh. Just ugh.
Updated on 3 Apr 2018:
I cannot lay on my stomach, touch my chest on the side with the implant, or hug people too hard without this sucker getting hard as a rock.
I have a lot of extra skin / tissue from weight gain and loss, and pregnancy over the past 11 years. So I honestly don't know what size I REALLY am. I wear a 38DD but I have never been fitted for a bra. After my initial surgery I was a C cup... now could be a DDD or even an F.
My breasts are not so much tissue as they are skin. My dream size is a B-ish. I am not sure how that would look on my frame, but honestly right now... I am not about looking proportionate! I am sure there are plenty of tall girls that have small chests and bigger hips / midsections, right?!
I am 5'10 and currently 230ish - currently werkin on my fitness (another reason I want my large chest downsized) - so I need to find myself some Tall Girl IBTC inspiration.
Updated on 21 Apr 2018:
So I got a phone call from a private number, but it was family time so I let it go to voicemail. I didn't listen to it until the next morning (yesterday) because I was afraid to listen to it. I don't know why, because this is something I want!
Dr. Brooks' office got the referral from my family doctor, and their message let me know when their earliest appointment was available. My name was written down for May 15th. Which is in 3 weeks and a little bit! I am freaking out!!!
I put this off for so long and now I am FINALLY moving forward. I am so ready to have this implant out and live life on the lighter side.
Updated on 21 Apr 2018:
Updated on 17 Jan 2024:
So I am now 34, and have yet to move forward with this.
The difference between now and back then is that I feel like now I am finally in a good place in my life to be able to take the steps needed. Just mentally and emotionally BETTER than who I used to be. A lot has changed, and I am so much closer to being able to go through with this than I was before.
Fingers crossed!