30yearsLater - Wilmington, NC

Hi all, I posted a comment 7 days ago under the...

Hi all, I posted a comment 7 days ago under the name 30yearsLater as that is how long I have had silicon breast implants. I am having problems with my right implant, a large dent on the side of breast & I am not sure of what is going on. I seriously want to see a doctor about explant surgery. First, I am seeing my GYN & hoping she'll get me in fast for a breast scan. Hoping at this point that it's an implant problem and not breast cancer! It has been a long 30 year journey.. I got implants at 25 years old just because my breast friend wanted them & a friend in the adventure. Yes we were both very small chested. Now at almost 56, Looking back all I can think is Wow! Learn, Learn & Grow(UP). I was unhappy from the beginning with the implant, mostly because I went in with perky cute boobs and came out lop sided and to big( I was 30 pounds if not more smaller than the last 20 years).. About 100 pounds soaking wet then. I had problems from the beginning, hardness and the doctor would manually squeeze and break up scar tissue( awful)!! I saw 2 other doctors earlier on in 1980's and did not have more money to spend, one doctor seemed think I looked just fine, and did not want to explant. This was all during the class action suit time with Dow. I did speak with an attorney and pretty sure I signed up to sue but moved several times, divorced, re-married almost 20 years ago and just really forgot all about it. Now I have NO proof of it being a Dow implant.
Life gets so busy, times even years fly by. About 12 years ago, I developed a rare neurological condition and I have had rashes comes and go as well as hives since shortly after.
I do think the implants are toxic esp after reading Dr. Susan Kolb's book.
Another interesting, disturbing thing is during a mammogram I was told one implant is under the muscle and one is over the muscle, which clearly is not what my doctor told me.. Both were to be placed under.
For those who saw my comment about needing to talk to my husband, who has never known me without implants. Well, I did that today. He wants me to see a doctor right away, I showed him the dent on right breast and he looked afraid for me. Which has made me feel anxious inside( outside I am calm)... Just me,
I am posting a few pictures. I do not have any nude pre implant pics as my doctor left the country with all records in late 80's & computers were not around back then to upload pics to.
I am so thankful to have found this site. I am reading non stop everyone's stories.
Hope I have not rambled on to much.
I will post again after my doctor visits. Also I do not have a date set yet for anything but this site wanted me to put a date & cost before it would post, so I did.

Before Implants & After Implants Info

1983..age25
5'2"
100-105 pounds
34A
After silicon Implants a full C ( asked for a full B)
2014..age55
5'2"
135-140 weight
36-38 C..some D's depending on the bra

Massage Today.. Unloaded my Anxiety to LMT & Doing It here as well..

Well.. Here I am updating already and no, have not seen my doctor(s) yet.
First thing this morning I made an appoint to see a plastic surgeon who is on this site. This was after reading ALL profiles of everyone in my town.
Nervously called, when ask what is your reason I said explant. That felt odd to say. I was thinking I bet most say, I want Implants!
My appt. is one week from today.
Already feel like butterflies are in my stomach!
Today I went for massage, I have a membership that my husband got me 2 years ago. With a history of frozen shoulder( same side as dented breast) and general aches esp in upper back & shoulders.. Massage gives me temporary relief.
As I was being massage, we started talking about books. As we are both avid readers, the LMT & I.
She asked me what I had read lately, I hesitated but said"from Harm To Healing" by Dr. Susan Kolb. The title interested her so I went from telling her about the book to my own Implant story. She was so calm and concerned. She talked of the media & how she feels it gives women a hard time just being natural. She is 30 years younger than I am( the same age I was when I got the Implants)! She is tiny and small breasted like I once was.. It was good to just talk to a young woman who is small and comfortable with herself as see clearly seems to be. Again past memories have been surfacing like I am back there again in 1983... I think wow if only someone caring & knowledgeable would have stressed you are perfect just as you are. Would I have listened? Maybe!
Now fast forward through 30 years, many attempts in the first 10 years anyway, to be seen by Dr.'s, to say I am not happy with these things inside me.. The profound depression the first 5 years after. Then life took over, helping my kids to grow, going back to college for my R.N. , divorcing & remarrying, moving & then the last 12 years of serious health issues & enjoying my grand babies.
The last 7 months, I have moved my mom into my house as she is in end stage cancer..
The dent in the breast.. It is there and it serves as a reminder to take care of myself.
My LMT stressed to me today, You MUST take care of yourself!
So finally, I am preparing to do that.
This Friday, I will see my GYN, without doubt she'll order a breast scan, Monday I see the plastic surgeon.. Probably will not even yet have the scan and/or results back.
I am mentally preparing myself now to look ahead.
It is time for a doctor to listen and to help me on this journey that I feel I must make, for my self, for my well being.
I want to get back to my natural state of being whatever that may now mean.

Saw GYN Today, PS Next

Today I saw my GYN Dr.
She agreed there is something not right, saw & felt the deni in my right breast. She said the breast felt inflamed &every warm. She also noted the coldness of left breast. I told her for 30 years both have been cold even in 90 degree heat.
She tried to get me worked in today for a breast scan with no luck. So that will be next week hopefully. She also put down mammogram, I told her that I did not think that is a good idea. She said newer procedures should be ok. Hmmm, I don't agree there!
She also suggest I see a PS, the same office I already have an appt for on Monday.
The visited ended with her saying a rupture would be better than breast cancer. I totally agree there!!
So now on hold pending a scan and praying it is not cancer.
She did say that 30 years is a long life for silicon implants( told her the doc who did the surgery said when I was a very old woman I'd have perky boobs)... She just shook her head & said yes, they use to say that but found out differently over the years.
In all she was concerned & had a great bedside manner.
Fingers crossed that the appt. Monday the 3rd will be with a PS who is so concerned and easy to talk with as the GYN was today.
Meanwhile, the right breast is achy more than it was, probably from the Dr.'s exam.

Correction to GYN Visit

Wow I must have been super tired last night. Typo-City on my GYN visit!
Tried to edit but having a problem doing so...
The GYN felt the"dent"... Not deni.. Lol
Also, I am hoping the PS who I will meet on Feb 3rd, Monday,,,hoping he will be as concerned and have a good bedside manner as the GYN was great, very concerned and nice.

Consult Today with PS

This morning I went for the consult.
The doctor was very knowledgeable & I feel confident & Up front ( no pun intended ).
He said lee king, ruptured or not, the have to come up. He said the implants are of 30 years ago are off the market. At this length of time if not rupturedthey will eventually.
He wants me to go ahead with a mammogram & ultrasound. I cannot have an MRI due to 10 stainless steel stents in my heart arteries.
He explained best to worse case with surgery.
I of course am hoping for best case! But mentally preparing for worse case!
He will do the explant in the hospital & possible even an over night stay due to my health.
Cardiac has to clear me first as fit for surgery/ General anesthesia.
He said he'd see me back after clearance & when tests results are back.
He did not do a physical exam today, he said that will be the next office visit.
Pics asked a ton of questions and he answered them with no problem and I feel honestly.
Example.. What will you do with the pocket? Answer: I prefer to let it collapse on its own, if necessary drains maybe placed. He'll assess that need based on how in depth my surgery goes and amount of blood/ fluids.
I ask him if he can take a picture and write a statement IF they are Dow Corning brand. Answer..most were from the 80's but after 30 years they will probably be unable to see any type of markings to prove brand. We'll see when they are removed.
I ask about En Bloc. He said, he will make every attempt to remove capsule and clean up any loose silicon but sometimes a little May be missed.
Hoping against hope that they are intact!
He told me that Medicare will pay for explant but not lift etc.
I told him if I feel I need a lift, I'll see a year later how I'm looking & feeling. He said, sounds like a good idea.
I really respected that he did not try to up sell me on more procedures. Did NOT say, You'll look horrid. He was very positive & kind.
So, now the waiting game of tests etc.
My right breast is aching like a toothache:(
Just be so glad to find out what is happening In there & get surgery & HEAL.

Waiting....Emotions flowing..

PS office is calling my cardiologist today for medical clearance., they just called for his number as there are 2 docs with the same name here..odd!
My breast scan is tomorrow & they just called to confirm.
I have now told my best friend of 12 years, she had no idea just thought I had perfect boobs.. Well never saw me nude! Lol
So good to have my daughter, best friend & my husbands support.
Still very nervous, wondering what the scan will reveal. Remembering GYN saying, let's hope it is a leak.. Could be worse as in breast cancer.
BigMistake82 you ask about cost of lift, we never spoke of the costs.. Probably because I told him I wanted a year to fully heal.. Hoping to FLUFF!
I am so lop sided, wondering if after I will still have a larger breast on left.. Plus right is the trouble maker!, but 30 years of left being stretched bigger..
Anyone reading this that was lopsided, explant without a lift and evened out??? Please comment!
My daughter has been so reassuring, she says mom it is natural to sag a little with age.. I think that is the key word..NATURAL.. It has been so long. You see I have now had implants longer than without!
How crazy is that!??
Like many here I could not see my natural beauty.. And wow looking back as others here have.. I had beautiful breasts. After implants, I wanted to hide myself esp my breast..before I was comfortable physically & emotionally with myself.
I have to look back honestly now.. Live & learn on this journey.
I must have thought I can be better than perfect?? Why did I think that way..
Cannot change the past.. I am forgiving of myself.. That 25 year old child really.. Uninformed child.. There was no instant info then, no fb, no internet!
Dow Corning & big Corps .. hush hushing the dangers.. Still are!
Dr.'s turn a blind eye still to the harm. My implanting Dr. Leaving the country during the beginning of the lawsuits, leaving no records.. DO NO HARM.. Part of their Oath..
I have so much time now just waiting..have researched & read so much.. Did you know silicon was first used as an insecticide....so us woman later became the cock roaches!
They are not dangerous?..hmmm.. Then why do mine " have to come out".. Why are the implants of 20-30 years ago off the market, why is Medicare & various manufactures willing to pay for explant?
I feel by directing my emotions right now on the whys.. It is helping me to know that I am a fighter & can get through this.

Big Scare after Scan... Now on HOLD

I went for the scan that my Gyn ordered & PS was also waiting on. My cardiologist cleared me for explant as long as I'm off the blood thinner, Plavix for 3 days prior.
So I go for the scan & a mammogram( the PS insisted on that despite my fears of squeezing a potentially ruptured implant).. It was a gentle mammogram, was not painful at all.
Right after mammogram, tech said wait, don't get dressed & she went to speak with radiologist on site. He wanted more views of the troublesome dented right breast & then a ultrasound.
The tech was so nice, she showed me my mammogram and commented that my implants were small and that I have lots of my own tissue. Ok, that alone put me on cloud 9!!
Within 10 minutes of leaving from the scan, my Gyn was calling my cell phone. She said, I am referring you to a surgeon for biopsy. There's a suspicious growth not a ruptured implant!
My appt is February 11th.. This Tuesday.
I am so scared. Hoping it is just a cyst, hoping it is not a big deal.
The nurse in me does not help here. As the quick calls with appt set within minutes of my scan has me on alert.
Meanwhile, my PS called & wished me luck & that I am on hold for explant pending biopsy results!
I truly feel this toxic 30 year old implants are the culprit!
It may not be a rupture but they are making me sick & the growth it is almost touching the implant!!
Please keep me in your prayers.
Just want these out ASAP & to heal from the years of damaged.

I have Lobular breast cancer

Hi all, wow what a week I had!
Dr.'s, more scans, a core biopsy.
My right breast is so bruised from test.
The verdict is in. I have Lobular breast cancer.
The plan( subject to change) as my Dr. Called me on sat( that was a shock)!
The doctor is a surgeon that my Gyn referred me too. He is beyond kind.. Rushed the lab, called me sat. With the bad news but the good news is I will do chemo for about 4-6 weeks( I CAN do this)!! Then the surgeon along with my Plastic surgeon will preform surgery together. Implants and tumor removed in one surgery vs two.
The doc feels I am early stage, the mass on my chest wall is small 1 cm but he first said he'd have to take a golf size of tissue out.. My response, great just great as this is already the smaller breast of the 2!! So for a better cosmetic result, the chemo will shrink the tumor to half the size. Lumpectomy will then be less dramatic.
We are now looking at April for the surgery!
The surgeon looked shocked when I said I did not want new implants but he did not disagree when I said I feel they have made me I'll for the last 12 years & I now think they caused this cancer as well.
I just purchased the Cancer Diet Book for my kindle & will ne working hard to fight cancer.
I am a survivor and I have no doubt I will survive this.
A little down that the surgery has to wait but it is for the best outcome.
I always said I'd never do chemo if I got cancer.
Never say never!

Finding the Humor

Date set!

Hi all, I have a date set, April 9th.
For a month, I've been on medication to shrink the cancer & recent repeat scan shows it has. So explant & lumpectomy.
I'll be so glad to get it over with. So many tests, scans & appt for last 5 weeks.. Already exhausted!
It was confirmed that the Dr. 30 yrs ago, placed 1 under muscle & other under..wth?. Again, lied to! both I was told were under. Explains the difference in my breasts since day 1.
Positive vibes needed as I prepare for this surgery.

Date set!

Oops, correction,,
Confirmed 1 was placed Under and the other Over!
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Comments (27)

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Thinking of you and praying that all is well with you . . .
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Xxxxxxxx I hope you are recovering well xxxx
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Praying for you and your surgery next week.
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OrdinaryGirl I'm so sorry to hear about the cancer and hope that you heal well. I had my silicone implants put in below the muscle in 1987 in Illinois but I have no records to show what make they are. I'm trying to find someone in my area of (Wilmington NC) to take them out. I will be thinking of you and wishing you luck with your journey!
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You are strong and you are going to survive this cancer !! Good luck hope all goes beyond well !!! I'll keep you in my prayers and thought. XOXO
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So happy for you! I am 3 weels post op. So glad to be rid of the plastic bubbles.. Its been a sore journey but really feeling good now! Dont go back to work too soon if you must work. You will feel liked a new person once they are out. I had a general anethesia good thing cause, lots of sweating of silicone and breakdown of the implant shell so they had lots of work to do when ygey got in. Never got sick or anything, had a little patch behind my ear. Breasts are quite small but will improve and natural is so much nicer and healthier. So glad to hear about your tumour shrinkage. You are going to be just fine. Wont ne long til this is all behind you. Hugs and thinking of you.. April
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You are inspiring!!! Thank you for sharing such an intimate personal experience. We are all banded together here and I know without a doubt that each and every one of us are sending hugs your way!!
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Sending love and prayers your way! Please, please keep us posted. Love and God Bless!!
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Sending you purest of prayers and positive thoughts for a speedy and uncomplicated recovery. Please keep us posted. Lots of ladies on this site to talk with and gain support. Xo
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I will remember you in my prayers.
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I'm sorry to hear the bad news but thankful to hear that your surgeon is being kind and that you have a good plan to fight this and get those things out. Well wishes to you!
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Ok now...You will fight this and beat it quickly.. Your surgeon sounds amazing..early stage is very curable! The chemo will work wonders quickly.. Thinking of you...
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Dear 30 years... I will pray but I want you to relax and qualm you fears... It is probably not what you are fearing. If you do find out it is, (and is is probably "NOT", you are still going to be OK. There is so much now in the form of treatments. There is such a fabulous success rate. You need to relax as best as you can to get through this. I am right behind you, I am just starting the process and I don't know for sure what I will be running into either. We are going to be just fine! Hugs, April
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I certainly will pray for you. I know this was not news you wanted to hear, but you are taking care of what needs to be done as soon as possible. Hopefully it is just a cyst and soon you can get those things out. Just rely on the Great Physician - He is in control! Love and prayers...
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OrdinaryGirl I was thinking about your comment about natural. I have had these things inside of me for much longer than I was without them. I have thought a lot lately about how it would feel to never have done this to myself. I just can't imagine how wonderful it must feel to be all natural. Too bad when you are 25 you have no idea how decisions you make can forever change your life.
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I feel just the way you do. I talked with the ps office that did my implants back in 1982 today. They don't keep records for 30 years. She is going to try and locate them in storage ( who knows where) but it doesn't sound hopeful. I don't even know what manufacturer made them, only that they are silicone and under the muscle. The doctor that did my surgery retired last year! Imagine that - I'm a year late! If I have some record of what I have then maybe I could get financial help with explant costs. So wish this bad dream had never happened. What in the world was I thinking? Too young to have any fear whatsoever about what I was doing to my body!
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big mistake82... I am in your same boat or maybe a worse one. My left silicone implant is leaking into my lymph nodes. I have enjoyed the look of my breasts, I must admit. At 58, I still enjoy looking nice and am planning to have a saline replacement. Let's just trudge forward in a positive manner... Get this behind us and move on with our lives..
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Did he mention anything about the cost of a lift? I'm very uninformed about the costs of these surgeries now days. My implants are also 32 years old also. Glad you have your consult behind you. Please update us, you have shared so many things that remind me so much of myself. Prayers for you and the upcoming surgery.
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That is great! When is your date? In March?
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I see her on March 31 for a consult, surgery at the end of May.
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Your story sounds amazingly like mine. I have had silicone implants since 1982. Last year my mammogram suspected that I had a rupture. An MRI confirmed that it was. I saw a PS that told me it should be fine left as is since the rupture is inside the capsule. I have been on an emotional rollercoaster since then. Take them out, leave them in. New implants, or just be saggy. I have an apt with Dr. Kolb in March. Hopefully by then I will be able to make the correct decision. Oh if only I could turn back the clock and be the way I was at 25 years old. I was fine just the way God made me and just couldn't see it. Please keep us posted after your dr visit. May God bless you!
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I always hated how cold silicone feels. So glad you got in to your gyn doc and she was helpful. HUGS
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Hooray that you joined us! Thank you so much for starting your story here. I think you'll find this community to be super helpful and supportive. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. She is lucky to have a daughter like you to take care of her. And it sounds like you're cognizant of taking care of yourself, too, so that is good!

If your first doctor is not supportive about removing the implants, don't be afraid to go to another and another if you need to. Please keep us posted on everything!
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So glad you joined us on the journey! It feels so good to be implant free. My yoga teacher reminded me that a decision like this releases lots of energy and it is good. She reminded me that I will feel the shift. It is EMPOWERING! The healing time is kinda rough but, I know it is good to come back to who I was meant to be and love myself. XOXOX
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Thank you. I hope that I will feel that! The healing is what is worrying me the most right now, will I heal without complications, will I be okay with my new body image. I've had implants longer than I didn't have them so wow yes I cannot wait to feel what it was like prior. The should be empowering in itself.
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