I'm 63 inches, 115 lbs, 12% body fat. I'm nervous...
I'm 63 inches, 115 lbs, 12% body fat. I'm nervous because of how little body fat I have and since I'm a fitness model I need these boobs to look natural. (most women are at 20 - 35% body fat) My PS just did a fitness trainer 8 weeks ago and she looks great, but she's only at 25% body fat. My biggest questions at the preop will be my concern over my low body fat percentage and how to make sure the BA looks as natural as possible.
As a body builder, figure coach I have always had clients who did it. I advocate it. I added some bulk muscle mass to my body and now my chest (flat chest) is out of proportion. So, time to do it! I'm scared but excited.
It will be under the crease incision, silicone, under the pectoral muscles. Kinda bummed that I will be not allowed to lift or yoga or ninja warrior or pushup/pull up at all for 6 weeks. Eek. So if anyone is a fitness / body builder and has done this please share your experience!
8 days out - can't wait!
in 2 hours my husband and I will be meeting our PS to determine the sizes. I'm shooting for a c cup, and natural look, but I def. want some boobage! I will return here later today to share with you all what occured. Wish me happiness and perfect boob thoughts! Can't believe that this time next Monday I will have finished my BA.
excited to know what I'm getting!
So my super awesome husband has been behind my idea since I first mentioned it a year ago, and last month when I said I wanted BA he was, nonchalantly, supportive. He will do anything for me and is such a gentleman. He came along today for the preop, we met our PS. Dr. Chike-Obi. What a nice and mellow doctor. He answered all of our questions, educated us and was very patient with us. It took 2 hours for me to get measured (I'm symmetrical except a tad leaner on the right pec side), decide on size (I'm going silicone 325cc each), and paperwork.
I asked about size differences and he said even if I were assymetrical, most women are, he would keep the implants the same because different implant ccs = different widths and you DON'T want two differing widths of implants! Whew. This guy is good.
Also talked about capsular contraction and the studies and latest theory of what causes it is a) patient has infected glands so adding implant triggers body's response b) going through the nipple may be a leading cause. I am going under the pec muscles and the cut will be under the boob crease. This will ensure least amount of complications or chance of capsular contraction he says.
Talked about shape, I thought I wanted high profile. lol, wrong. High profile means 325ccs will be in a cone and that is not what I want. I'm going 325cc in a regular, to ensure that the implant fits my current breast width, yet giving me volume. VOLUME, baby! That's what I want.
So, starting with 200cc, and trading each implant out of my sports bra until I got to 400cc helped me decide what I wanted. Originally I was checking out shape, but the Dr. made it clear that "don't look at shape, look and feel the volume". OK. Decided the 325cc were a tad bit bigger than the look I wanted, but felt alot better than the 300cc volume. Tried on my shirt. yep, 325cc each it is!
minocycline hcl for antibiotic
promethazine hcl for nausea
tramadol for muscle relaxer
emend prior to surgery, just one
flexeril 3x day for 10 days muscle relaxer
I'm allowed to take kava kava when it runs out.
Basics like no blood thinners and what to wear were covered, as well as expect chest pressure first two days, like a hard workout feeling.
I thought I was getting Twilight anestesia, but it looks like they will be knocking me out. good. I don't want to know about it. I will wake up and my husband will drive me home to rest. The next day is a follow up appt., and a week later as well.
I purchased my scar therapy silicone pads already, and am all set to be wearing them for the next 3 months as the scars heal up. No tubing, lake swimming, surfing, pool swimming for 6 weeks.... okay. *sad face*
I plan on coconut water, soups and brisket for meals once I can. Especially until my body wakes up by day 2 or 3 from the anestesia. (All digestive functions cease due to it, and until it's out of the body you shouldn't eat! Only hydrate). I'm guessing that the first day or two I will be on a liquid diet. No prob.
I'm very excited and nervous but feel that the staff and the Dr. are so nice, professional and have answered all of my questions so well I'm in great hands!
The only thing is I have not, and do not plan on, told my parents. My mom is extremely judgemental and rude. She competes with me so I see this as something that, if she has any sense whatsoever, she will just not talk about. If it comes up I will just brush her off. That is really why I'm so nervous about my family and what they will say once they notice....
says I'm same body shape as Amy Adams. cool.
When I said that I want to get rid of my chicken chest the Dr. laughted. I said, you know, the boniness right here. I want to wear v shaped plunging necklines but look sexy! I'm so flat chested and I want to look natural when I wear a plunging neckline. The Dr. said I look like Amy Adams, size wise, and that I had to look up her images online.
Wow, exactly cool look I want.
He implied that is what I will end up with. We'll see!
before after - the good vs. bad
still making sure I have some pics to bring in the day of my operation pointing out what I want and what I don't want!
getting set - so much to do!
so, three of the 5 meds that the doc prescribed for me I can't take. I did a quick search online about the drug ingredients as my gastroenterologist taught me, because I don't trust that the PS's office staff did. Sure enough, problems.
minocycline hcl and tramadol both have PPG (polyethylene glycol 3350 NF) which is a laxative because it kills the lining of your digestive tract, thus shedding the vital layer of your small and large intestines along with anything inside the. Way not cool. I need my digestive tract.
promethazine hcl has wheat in it as a starch base, and that will trigger my celiac and cause death. Not cool at all.
I plan on shopping for bras today as well as getting my blood work done. I'm waiting on the doc. office to call me back later today. *sigh*
Reviewing people's BA on realself...
My husband and I were looking over the reviews here on realself this morning. I'm getting better at seeing the differences at over vs. under implants and shape of implant high vs moderate. I definetely am confident about my shape choice of moderate and my husband agrees. I'm a bit ambivilant about how big my implants will be, 325cc silicone seems big to me, but I keep rereading my post from yesterday's thoughts on our fitting/sizing experience and that sets me straight again. I start doubting myself when nervous so having my own thoughts down in this blog is very helpful!
I have to say I absolutely hate the look of anyone who has had over the pec muscle implants. I am not saying I hate that person, just the look. There is such and obvious (to me) difference in how unnatural and fake it looks (to me).
I'm confident that the temporary discomfort of under muscle implantation will be worth it for a natural look. I really am excited about this and keep thinking to myself, "boobage! I will have boobage!" lol.
I think everyone's boob reviews that I read all look great. I've not come across any that made me cringe, unlike octomom or some other celeb pics that I have come across on the web. That makes me feel better about plastic surgeons as a whole - you know, that they care about the average woman who wants BA. I stopped looking at celebrity pics yesterday because I couldn't take it any more. OMG, what happened to Meg Ryan's face? And when will Donnatella V. quit? lol.
This is my first cosmetic surgery proceedure, but I know that 10 years from now, depending on my body fat percentage and body shape, I will probably get BA done again to resize. That seems to be the norm here in Austin TX.
So many women have BA here. I hate to say it but I think being surrounded by women with perfect breasts when I moved here started to give me boob envy! I am happy to say I've given in. This summer I will be rocking my bathing suit with boobage for the first time in my life. Between my perfect ass (my best asset!) and my fake boobs I think this will be the first time in my life I can actually say that I will feel like I will look sexy. I've never looked sexy, only cute or girlish. I've never had a problem being cute. But as of last summer I had a desire to look sexy. weird. Well, I'm ready. No children and living a lifestyle of always being active left me busy to always have fun, but my idea of fun is motorcycle racing, extreme sports, and travel. As I hit middle age last year I accept that I should slow down a bit and since I'm not getting any younger, yet I have the body of a 20 something year old, why not try on sexy? Not obscene or trampy, just classic Betty Page kinda style....
oh man, tmi? lol. You all have these thoughts too, right? lol. okay, off to get my chores done. Later, fellow BAers!
so, we finally got my meds straight.
the five of them are gluten free, ppg free, color free and will be in plain white tablet form. People's Pharmacy, who is super cautious about this kinda thing and can mix/compound any drug custom was extremely helpful with my Doc.'s office. Nurse Jen handled everything well, even when I was panicking a bit.
Walgreens didn't do squat and even said that they didn't care. Wow. I could die but you won't even look up the prescriptions to check to see if they are gluten free? Good bye. Never going there again.
Augmentin 500mg for antibiotic
Promethazine anti nausea
Norco and Extra Strength Tylenol for pain management
Flexeril muscle relaxer
Emend pre op for anti nausea
whew. Also just purchased my bras, a back support for the recliner, neck pillow travel ring and my chiropractor gave me a wedge pillow. She's the first person I shared with about the BA. She was cool and told me that she did hers 10 years ago when she was 50 and it was no problem! I was happy to hear that.
prepping, still prepping....
well, I'm excited that I'm a few short days away from boobs. Yesterday I did my bloodwork (super small vial was taken) at Any Lab Test Now. Pretty good walkin lab. I told Brian the technician "I'm a fainter" and he was an angel. Just a prick and it was over.
I have my neck roll, wedge pillow and back chair support purchased and ready.
I've made some paleo banana oatmeal cookies for myself to munch and some chili stock. I can't eat tomatos, avocados, cyanne pepper or anything else that is a blood thinner a week prior to surgery, but a few days after I can eat them. I'm going through chili withdrawls! lol.
So the stock is ready, some for me, some for my husband to have since I will not be cooking for a few days after surgery. I feel pretty set!
costs so far
well I want to share with you fellow BAers my costs:
anesthesia $400 + $700 = $1100
Surgery and mentor memory get silicone 325ccs = $4400
Scar treatment patches (8 count) = $19.95
Neck pillow and back support = $17
Two front open bras = $17. 80 each
Blood count lab = $25
Metabolic panel lab = $30
Scar therapy gel and chest strap = free from PS
Wedge seat pillow = free from chiropractor
kava kava for week 2 post op = $3 amazon.com
still taking my B3, B6, B12, amino acids, DHEA, vit K1, AZO yeast, D3 and dropped down to one fish oil supplement a day. Will up my potassium and magnesium as I get closer to surgery.
ouch , Emend that one little pill they recommended that I take right before surgery for anti nausea is $95. It better be worth it!
hydrocodone acetaminophen 10 day supply $35
5 Promethazine tablets $10
amoxacillin and clavulanate 10 day supply $50
cyclobenzapr 10 mg tab 3xday for 10 days $20
so meds totaled $210, and I can't believe how expensive that emend is. Has anyone not taken it? I hate having to take so much crap, but I know I probably will need the anti nausea ones and hope to wean off of those asap.
The pharamicist made it really clear to me that I must take a probiotic in the middle of the day to help prevent a total digestive system bug collapse. The antibiotic will absolutely wipe out every bacteria in my body so a probiotic is a must during and after the med. I had no idea you can do probiotic while on an antibiotic, but she said if I didn't I would have serious problems. ok. covered. I think I need to set my med schedule up... My husband will be home day one and in the am of day two to take care of me.
It looks like all my fellow BAers were up and running around by day two. :) I really hope I will be too.
Today I woke up excited, thinking for the first time to myself, "soon you will have boobs!" I am actually getting happy. I'm surprised at myself.
Physically, in preparation for this surgery I stopped all heavy resistance training 4 weeks ago and switched to a fat burn aerobic and cardio interval training cycle. Psychologically I hate these cycles because I naturally get stringy so quickly. I prefer the plump pump look versus the look my body really wants to adapt to, the gymnast look. Other than the fact that I've lost plump and all of the intense stretching of my upper body has me a bit sore I'm feeling great. Bridges, arm and shoulder stretches, chest stretches... probably will not be doing any of them until 7 weeks after surgery. Doc.'s orders. But my fellow BAers that I personally know were so active by week 7 so I know I will do great with my recovery.
three days until BA! can't wait!
oh, so anxious! I asked the office if I could come in today to see after pictures of women my size, admitting how anxious I am and that I just need to double check my decision. They were very polite and said, 1130? So nice! I just feel like I need to see after pics by the doc one more time. Ones similar in size to me, not the hundreds of D, E, F cup boob sizes that were mixed in.
I am also a nervous wreck about the after surgery bra. I can't seem to find one anywhere here and the two I ordered from Amazon may be too big? Hmm. I recieved one in the mail yesterday and the other should be here by tomorrow.... But I found it too tight and the cup size seemed huge.
I'm drinking tons of mineral water with a squeeze of lemon, and just tryig to hydrate. My tom started today, so I'll be switching from my diva cup to an instead day of the surgery. (Insteads allow you to void so you don't have to keep removing and emptying the cup). The instead should last me those extra 2 or 3 days of shark week without having to pull and clean it if I just can't. Thank God for cups.
well, I'm all set.
Friday I double checked the after pics of women my size and talked with Dr. Chike-Obi. Way cool.
Then I ran down the highway to the outlet mall and picked up two of the zip zip hooray playtex bras which will do nicely later in the future. The metal front zipper was much better than the crappy plastic one Champion had. And those bras are super comfy.
Today my husband took some before shots and we laughed about saying good bye to them. The new addition is much anticipated.
Then the VF outlet had a cotton close front bra for $7. Whew. Cuz the one I ordered from Amazon has yet to come in, but even though I don't need one until Tues. am for my post op appt. I wanted to be sure I had one premedicines.
I had a great weekend with my husband celebrating the upcoming new boobs. Took my antibiotic and am ready for bed. This time tomorrow I will be konked out sleeping I hope, comfortably with a full C cup sized boobs. I'm hoping the gluten free choc. chip cookies for dessert will give me food coma from the sugar. Nothing worse than not being able to fall fast asleep thinking of the big day.
I have my yoga pants, slippers, comfy socks, two zip up shirts to wear laid out. My meds are all ready to take with me in the am. Neck pillow and vitamin water with snacks too.
Can't think of anything else except a big thank you to my fellow BAers.
first day postop
doing really good. I'm 24 hours post op and just on the pain meds. The breathing was tough until the doctor took off the tight dressings this morning. I have yet to see my boobs, but my husband did take a pic before I got into my cotton bra. I had two sizes with me, a c and a d/dd. Guess which one the nurse put on? :) dd
I still get muscle twinges and it hurts to reach for things but I am happy that this isn't as bad as I thought it would be. I will taking the muscle relaxer before bed. That will help me sleep. I was pretty drowsy with it! My husband didn't sleep well at all last night and can't eat. Poor thing.
All in all, good so far and I will peep at my boobs tomorrow, with the help of my husband. Shower time with him and the new boobs will be fun.
I've not been hungry at all. The only thing I've eaten since Sun night was a coconut water strawberry probiotic smoothie an hour ago.
Going to the bathroom as of this morning has been tolerable. As long as I move my arms slowly they will not hurt too bad. I feel like I did 200 pushups!
Over all, the worst thing was just getting that damn IV in my arm. Not fun at all and it stung. It had to be done, and waking up after the surgery was no prob. I took the emend prior to surgery for anti nausea, and haven't had any additional since.
Before the BA I was a 34 B bra. My 32C pushup bra has gaps and I couldn't completely fill it without those little pillows in the pockets of the bra cups. My boobs were perky and the only cleavage I had was muscle cleavage.
It has been two days post op and I am beginning to feel better since I can lift my arms slowly to shoulder height without pain. My right pec minor is spasming alot, but it deminishes with the use of the muscle relaxer. T rex arms has my husband worried and not sleeping well. I feel bad for him. I'm pretty swollen and even my abs are swollen down to my coochie.
I've been sleeping in the reclining chair in the living room, propped up with pillow, back support, and my neck pillow. I love that neck pillow!
The chest strap is uncomfortable, but starting to be tolerable. The pain meds are still key for me. I'm just chilling and sleeping alot.
Last night I checked out my breasts. They look huge to me, and there is so much upper chest swelling, I have to imagine the perfect boob look because it has yet to appear. ;) The chest strap is suppossed to help get the implants to settle low and to prevent them from shifting. I think the strap has saved my a couple of times - I tried to do dishes yesterday and was reaching for the faucet when pop pop, snap occured followed by intense pain and right pectoral muscle cramps. Scared me, but no bruising or swelling more than there already is so I think the strap kept the implant in place while my muscles decided to dance and freak out. http://www.realself.com/question/wearing-bra-strap-after-breast-augmentation was the only thread that I read about the chest strap.
I'm still not hungry but I'm drinking plenty of water and have one or two small meals a day. Premade my meals for today and tomorrow, husband will be out of town for work so it's just me and netflix and my fellow BAers here.
post op thoughts
I'm pretty tired and swollen. My implants are really high. My boobage is huge and moving my arms, especially my right one, is slow and a trust process. I trust that I can move them and when I feel the muscles sliding over the implants I trust that this is normal and nothing to freak about.
I'm confident I have achieved a full C cup size, but it will be another 2 months for the final results in size come in. I love my new clevage. I definetely have the amy adams cleavage I wanted. Very very very happy.
51 hours postop
doing pretty well today. Still protecting my chest muscles with very limited range of motion with my arms. My ps told me to not raise my arms above my shoulders for 2 weeks, and to keep the chest strap on as well. The chest strap is fine, even though it gives me allot of pressure ontop of and at the sides of my new boobs.
They are riding high and are bigger than I thought they would be. I'm happy with the size and am sure that once the swelling goes down they will stunning. Right now they are riding high and have a bit of a square shape, but I know that is because of my pectorals. Pecs are square. Once the swelling goes down it's going to look great.
I have this crinkling, cellophane like feeling under my skin. I have, what feels like, .5" of water under my skin from my shoulders down to my coochie. When will this water/swelling go away? It itches!
I have no bruising at all and the tape over my incisions can't be bigger than 1.5", which is insanely awesome.
I love them - I really love them. If you are thinking of BA but are nervous, just do it! Everything you need to know can be found on this website. It really helped me. I was a nervous wreck and took months to get up the guts to do it but it is so worth it. Thanks to all my fellow BAers for the support! Here's some pictures of my chest 51 hours post operation. Still can't believe I'm in a DD sportsbra for recovery. I think this is as big as I could go to stay looking natural. 32 B to a 32 D. I did the 325cc mod. plus silicone and on my tiny physique it makes me look perfect. Hourglass shape!
now my chest measurement is 36
yea! And I'm in love with my boob cleavage. Now, if only all this water weight under the skin will go away. I'm so smooth.
4 days post op
Feeling pretty good, right pec at the right armpit is still tight and cramps up alot, but I'm feeling pretty good. Using my right arm causes cramping. I am still too woozy to shower by myself, and I tried to give myself a washcloth bath, but got sick and dizzy when holding it in my right hand. I emailed my doctor about this.
I'm not taking any meds at all. I took a muscle relaxer before bedtime last night, but woke up at 2am, took an advil, went back to bed and slept on my back. I just couldn't sleep sitting up anymore. It felt good to sleep on my back, and I'm not sure if I will do it again. I don't know why it's so important to sleep sitting up?
Eating normal and not lifting anything more than a bottle of vitamin water. Off to walk on the treadmill later. I hope that the postop swelling of my torso and belly starts to go away. I feel like I'm holding onto alot of water weight.
5 days post op
doing pretty good. No pain meds since yesterday before bed, and that was advil. No nausea meds at all, but I've been so sick and dizzy after strenuous movements I've considered them. (Like driving the truck, quick reaches accidently in the kitchen, accidently pushing myself up with forearm in bed). Getting dressed is a chore but my husband has been helpful.
I have brownish green bruising on my sternum, cleavage, and right side boob. I think this is due to using my arms a bit too much. I definitely feel the pectoral muscles siezing up, contracting, and rubbing against the implants when I move too quickly or too big. Thank God for the chest strap which holds those puppies in place. According to my ps I'm not allowed to raise my arms higher than my shoulders, push, pull, open/close car doors, push ups, planks, lift anything over 5 lbs, jog, or jump. I can see why. To ensure that my thicker than a normal woman's pec muscles heal around the implants the doctor told me it is important for me to not move them around. okay. Easier said than done!
And this bloat. Ugh. I have had a bowel movement and am back to normal, but the water weight gain is insane. http://www.realself.com/question/stop-bloating-after-breast-augmentation
I am avoiding all meds at this point, am excited at the super sexy boobs I now have, even tho they are squareish and need to drop. I had sex this morning and I'm doing better than I though I would.
Physique training woes
I'm so hungry all the time,,, so I'm changing up my macros and going to hit the gym every day to walk and do legwork. Slow and fatburning workouts.... If I'm going to be 6 weeks without upper body workouts I guess lower is all I have left. treadmill and bodyweight only.
well, it's real. I think having the chest strap helps immensely with this. The swelling I feel at the sides and under my armpits is the worst in the am.
I had a problem this am breathing, but I changed bras and that helped. I'm also making sure to put jojoba oil on my gals as soon as I get out of the shower to keep the skin hydrated.
I get pains in my pecs if I reach to my shoes, reach to touch my head, sit up straight, raise my arms above horizontal. I will post as this gets better.
I no longer have pain laying on my back or sitting up straight in a chair.
8 days post op - busting out of C, definetely a D cup gal now
wow. I'm a bit disappointed in my size. I am afraid I went too big. I wanted a nice C cup, but I will absolutely be a D cup. I'm super sexy and have no way to hide these new boobs under a sports bra like I intended to when I wanted. The goal was a C cup, and just use a push up or padded bra if I want to get a bit more fuller look, but hide the boobs when needed. Also, for fitness and yoga I didn't want too much. Dang it, I can't even put on my socks in the morning without lifting my knee up and hitting a boob. ouch.
So, I am adjusting to this sudden new boob look. I wear them well, but it will be next to impossible to gender bend that's for sure! lol. Glad I don't do theater arts anymore.
I have definitely achieved a very womanly figure. Bye bye girl figure. I will never again have to deal with old men in the store flirting with me like I'm a teen or young lady. I have aged 10 years and now look like I'm in my 30s and out of the early 20s!
I wish I had discovered that for every 200cc of implant you gain a Cup Size! No one ever told me that, I just found that out yesterday reading a ps's post. Well, my former tiny B cup boobs are now D cup boobs.
How am I doing?
ugh. I did too much too soon and by Saturday had slight purple bruising under my R arm pit at the side boob and near the sternum at the incision line too. Just the R boob. My sternum and side boobs on both sides remained a lovely shade of brownish green. My sternum and pectoral minors were really getting stretched to the max, and my pectoral majors were blown up like balloons.
I can't sit up straight and roll my shoulders back yet, which is killing my upper back. My posture sucks right now. It hurts to walk, my boobs need alot of support!
The doctor saw me yesterday, removed two stitches from each incision, then put scar therapy gel and scar therapy patches on each one. My husband was in awe at the super tiny and thin incisions, wondering how the implants even got through that. Dr. Chike-Obi said, "it's magic"
I'm taking ibuprophen, and avoiding the muscle relaxers as of Monday night. I'm at day 8 now, a full week after my BA and ready to start focusing on getting back to my active life. Unfortunately, the doctor reminded me that I can not lift my arms above my head for another week (couldn't even if I wanted to, the pain!) and to avoid lifting anything over 5 pounds.
I will - in another 2 months - be fully cleared to get back into my bodyweight training and powerlifting.
The pocket that the doctor created under my pec major muscles was under the muscle belly itself. That means that the implant is centered closer to my sternum than other techniques, and the muscle will heal up so well that there will be no scars, adhesions, or tears to worry about once I get back into body building. yea. I just have to treat this like a cycle of tendon and muscle preparation.
I'm still uncomfortable sleeping, and the morning boob is still horrible. This morning was the first morning that morning boob wore off within an hour of getting up. I think sitting in the recliner with my tea against a heating pad is what makes things better. I only just started that yesterday.
All in all, having big pec muscles is what is causing so much pain. The doc. said that I will be fine in a few weeks but I must take it easy. The strap is worn at night now, and will be gone in another week I hope. I see the doc. next week, he added another post op appt. for me at 2 weeks!, to make sure that I'm healing well.
I am very happy and so impressed with Dr. Chike-Obi's care, concern, communications and the staff of Westlake Dermatology and Surgery Center!
I still can't believe I had the guts to do this.
2 weeks post op experiences at home and with Doctor
I'm two weeks post op and saw the doctor again yesterday. I have to say that week 2 has been more painful (psychologically and physically) for me than week 1 was. I am extremely swollen, more swollen at week 2 than week 1, am only doing 600 to 1200mg of ibuprofen before bed, and am getting miserable without exercise. If I try to exercise, like walking or leg work I hurt. If my boobs bounce, they hurt. My right pectoral under and in front of my right armpit still has a slight purple bruise and is most likely strained or pulled. I can't lift my right arm past my eyes, lifting my elbows hurt, stretching forward or to my toes hurt.... I only just yesterday am able to bend forward from the waist without feeling my implants causing discomfort.
I keep bumping into them. It is difficult to put on clothes and my front closing bras. It is difficult to sleep, I still have to prop myself up slightly. My morning boob pain only lasts about 15 minutes now, and I can gingerly drive the truck. Any quick movement (tossing a sock, closing a car door, opening a heavy door, pushing the dishwasher tray inwards) will be met with immediate seizures of my pectoral muscles. The complete clampdown solid as a rock abnormally quick and painful kind. My muscles really don't want to be used at all. If I move slowly and cautiously I am all right.
I'm wondering if this will be worth it. I can't wait until this becomes a mild discomfort and the swelling goes down. I can't place my arms at my sides, the insides of my arms hit the sides of my swollen boobs. My pectoral muscles are so swollen, the swelling is up to my clavicle. The doctor said that this is normal and it will be another couple of weeks before I notice reduced swelling. I am not allowed to lift anything heavier than 1/2 gallon of water. wtf? Blow to ego; I used to be able to do multiple sets of 70# dumbell flys, now I'm being told to not disturb the implants by avoiding all lifting of everyday objects.
I am not allowed to massage my chest muscles or boobs. I asked the doctor. He did say I can get neck massages for my tight traps and levators. My neck is killing me! So tight.
I can't pull my shoulder blades together - not being able to completely and fully stretch the top of my spine has led to much discomfort and tightness in my upper back and neck. I wiggle my rib cage and twist my body occasionally, which brings a slight pop mid or low back, with relief, but nothing to relieve the upper back and shoulder blades... :(
It will be another couple of weeks before I can touch the pec muscles.
I've been cleared to begin to get range of motion and attempt to raise my arms, but honestly my right arm is not cooperating. By keeping my elbows tucked in, close to my face, I can put my hair up now, but such movements bring on chest swelling. Ice and rest....
For the past 5 days I've been off any semblance of the strict diet of clean eating I was on for 3 years. Ice cream, bagels, rice with all my chinese food is bringing me comfort as well as a few extra pounds of thigh fat. I need to back down off the carbs. Drink more water.... I am so motivated to get hopping again and I am day dreaming about weight training, going through with drawls.
I really am impressed with the Doctor and his staff. Any time I've been to the office or communicated with them they have been humble, polite, professional. I can't say enough good things about them.
In yesterday's check up the nurse in the room with me stood out of my peripheral vision as Dr. Chike-Obi reviewed my progress. Again, his demeanor was wonderful. I've never had any medical experience where everyone in the staff, as well as the doctor, had the charismatic ability to relax you with a kind word, meek body language, sincere smile. I told the ladies that upon check in and check out...they responded that they appreciate having conscientious clients like me to make their jobs easier. Beyond polite! I am so blessed to have come upon this gem of a cosmetic surgery center. Their demeanor alone has relieved me time and again of my anxiety during my journey down this road.
for the first time in my life I have an hourglass shape.
my upper body is proportionate to my lower body
I feel quite sexy and at times frisky
my husband loves the new boobs, yet is sympathetic and cautious to my pain.
my PS has kept my husband in the loop about everything, even going so far as to make sure I told my husband that he says "hello" when my husband was not at the appt. yesterday.
I am confident that I will end up with the amazing boobs I've dreamed of
I am floored at my gravity defying and perfect cleavage. Amy Adams cleavage! I will not even need boob tape.
the incisions are tiny and healing well
The f'kn pain!
The discomfort of not being able to workout
The added body fat I will have to work off
The fear that I will not physically do what I once was able to do in the gym
The abs are no longer 8 pack abs. I'm down to 6 pack abs. I think the stress of surgery created a cortisol surge that landed stress fat on my lower abs. Ugh. This will take quite a bit of serious work to eliminate.
Gaining body fat while in recovery mode
Feeling useless and like a sloth even though I know I must rest!
links to fitness figure body building Breast Augmentation info
I reread these and felt I should share the links with you all. Now I can relate to the recover aspects some of these competitors blogged about. These all influenced me in my decision to get BA.
I want to make it very clear that cosmetic surgery by fitness competitors and figure models is more common than people realize! It is just not talked about or shared, with many competitors hoping to hide it!
My thought to all physique athletes, body builders, fitness models:
hello to those dedicated physique athletes considering BA,
I'm an advanced cpt and fitness / figure choreographer and physique coach. Since 1998 I have worked with physique athletes and want to share my thoughts, observations and knowledge with you all. Now that I have undergone BA for the first time I feel I can fully understand what many of my former clients have undergone and wish for you all to have a happy BA recovery should you chose this journey.
I humbly ask you to research and take your time in your choice of how and what you want to do - especially consider the long term look that will be achieved once BA is performed.
We fitness and figure competitors are NOT some hobby driven group fitness instructors, who will be smooth and undefined pretty much all of their life. Being active or a fitness enthusiast has nothing to do with the future outcome of the BA look that will be achieved in the long run. Be sure to not consider the advice of anyone who is not a physique athlete, or if you do, don't put too much credence into their advice. They do not have as much muscle mass as you do and most likely will not ever achieve the lean body fat percentage you will, so their recovery and finished BA look will be much different than yours will.
Lean body mass has everything to do with the look of your Boobs!
Physique athletes get as low as 12% body fat, a body fat percentage that will cause rippling and ugly chests for anyone with over the muscle implants. Under the muscle is the only option for the most natural looking BA for any woman who will be at 15% body fat or less, unless you are a full on body builder class physique athlete. Anyone who is naturally lean at the upper body (can easily get abnormally lean at the chest bone) will get the best, most natural looking results with under the pectoral muscle BA.
The only exception to this rule would be an avid body builder who will actually be hindered by BA. The implants will block the body builder from bulking their pectorals and hide them from the judges. Take a good look at Lenda Murray vs. Sophie Duquette on stage, http://www.bodybuildinglive.com/articles/2002_olympia/prejudge_women.htm Lenda's padded top is nice, and her Ms. Olympia pectoral muscles are not hampered or hidden like Sophie's are behind breast implants.
Other Physique Competitors in the Bikini, Figure, Fitness categories are expected to have breasts, with Bikini being the class that most emphasizes that breastfeeding boob look of femininity. The Fitness class is more akin to the Body Building class with the need of muscle bulk with definition.
Consider the long term goals and look of your BA.
Don't be afraid to start small with BA size, and note that you will most likely want to get bigger or resize the implants in a few years. This is normal and very typical for the physique athlete.
Going too big too soon, especially your first time with BA, can actually rip the pectoral muscle attachments or cause muscle damage! When done smart, BA for physique competitors and enthusiasts is safe and does not hinder the athlete in any way.
finally, relief from the pain
yesterday as the day went on the clenched chest muscles started to relax and I resolved to get back into the planned walking and lower body exercises I wanted to do last week but could not tolerate.
I walked up and down my hill for 30 minutes, boob bounce was not painful! yea!
This morning I was finally able to say morning boob was only a few minutes of pain under right armpit, and now for the first time I can pull my shoulder blades back a bit more. I have a bit more muscle tightness on the right side, but noticed that my left pec is now completely relaxed. I can actually feel that the left boob is softer than the right. Really looking forward to the right side catching up.
Thank you ladies for the encouragement, I really do need it. I can't believe how it has taken almost 3 weeks post op before the constant pain of cramping up and swelling is starting to subside.
The best part is that I can now see my collar bone! Yep, the chest muscles were so tense I couldn't see it. Now I have my neck and collar bone back, and I can see the swelling has dropped to about 1.5 inches below it.
Tons of hydration, rest, careful movements, gentle shoulder rolls, chicken wing movements in a hot shower, and meditation have made this week's recovery better. I hope my fellow BAers are doing better than me. Happy thoughts! I think I will try bedtime with no ibuprofen tonight.
3 weeks post op
still sore, can't wear shirts that don't zip up the front or have a large neck opening.
swelling is going down, still square boob. Purple right side bruise is gone. Occasional pops here and there, like if I sneeze.
I like the size and am looking forward to them relaxing. Just going nutszo because my chest is still so tight I can't lie flat. Got a neck massage today, getting another on Friday.
four weeks of healing...
I'm still pretty miserable that I look freakish with the swollen pec muscles giving me an abnormal shape to my chest. I can't even look at my boobs. I've ignored them for the past week, and even told my husband I think that I may have went too big. I just want to get back into the gym and start weight lifting again, but just a 3 mile hike in the canyon leaves them swollen and achy. uggggh.
My husband told me that they look great and the swelling will go down, but I must rest and not push it. Yes, he's right, but I find myself gingerly testing out how I feel. A 1 gallon jug of water is pretty much the extent of lifting. I can now lay flat on my back, and I am just now starting to be able to pull my shoulder blades back, but still can't get upright when attempting to do so. There is no way I could even bring my elbows above my head with my hands behind my neck, and I still have morning boob swell and discomfort. When will this end?
I started doing some barre classes. I can't move my arms, but at least I can focus on leg and glute work. I will look into getting into some spin/cycling classes this week. I feel like I'm so smooth, and loosing my muscle tone. It is messing with my mind.
How can other women brag about a quick recovery? I feel like with one month gone, I'm nowhere near recovered enough to say I'm feeling great. :(
what I still can't do 4 weeks post op
Per PS's advice I'm to avoid lifting anything over 15 pounds, massaging, high impact activities until he sees me again next week (5 weeks post op)
When I lay flat on the floor, I can't lift my arms over my head towards my ears, I can't bring my arms together when starting from a cross position. Anything that requires my pec muscles to do all the work is painful.
I have extreme difficulty putting on and taking off shirts. Just not enough range of motion. Reaching up into a tall kitchen cabinet is tough too. I have a stool in the kitchen now.
I have to use both hands to shift when driving my car, as using one arm normally causes cramping in the chest muscles.
Throwing. I can't use a fast motion like underhand toss or the pec muscles cramp up immediately. Still moving slowly and it's like I'm reteaching myself how to move my arms.
Can't sleep in any other position but on my back, and propping my upper body up helps prevent morning boob. This week I started my period, so perhaps the boob tenderness is from that?
Ca and Mg supplementation doesn't seem to do anything for me. A bit of ibuprofen before going out to tackle chores seems to help. Ice cream is helping my mental state though, lol.
5 weeks post op - I visited with nurses yesterday
last week was so much better with recovery. I have to say I am pretty impatient to get back to 100% exercise and movement wise, but the nurses I talked to yesterday at the office made it clear that will be another 3 - 6 months of progressive (slow!) improvements and exercise. We had some good laughs about my questions and I feel much better. Pretty much most of what I read here on RS about how to recover and what to expect with BA is NOT at all what my PS is allowing me to do. It seems that he is in the new school recovery mindset.
- don't massage or move implants for minimum of 6 weeks.
- wear support, sports bra for minimum 6 weeks
- no exercise for 4 weeks and minimal and gentle exercise for up to 8 weeks, no heavy lifting more than 15#
I can only assume that this new school thought of not allowing the breast implants to move the first 6 weeks is to ensure that the capsule that forms around the implants is as smooth and scar free as possible. Also to ensure that the muscles don't push and squeeze against them and for the pocket to not stretch out. A big pocket is bad.
The nurses implied that the side boob soreness is the very last to go, lasting months. Okay. Glad to know this is normal. I've not much range of motion yet with raising my arms, the nurses said this is also typical. Not to push it. I really do miss being able to sleep on my side and spooning.
They seemed horrified that I asked what the time line is on being able to get back to climbing and pullups, lol. Months. wow. ok.
Each nurse is months into recovery themselves, one having had saline and the other silicone. They advised me to always wear the most support possible, as much as possible, to prevent implant fall. One nurse told me that she even places a small towel in her bra at night in her cleavage so that when she sleeps on her side (she's at 6 months recovery) she can keep the top boob from stretching and losing it's perkiness. I like that advice.
To keep them perky for as long as possible takes work, but since this is the look I'm wanting for as long as possible it looks like I'm wearing a bra at night from now on. Husband says fine, as long as they are sexy bras and cuddleable. :)
The biggest laugh was when I told them about the skin shedding that occurred one day early last week. Like total boob dandruff. They both gave me such relief when they smiled and said yes, totally normal and will go away. I've done some apricot scrubs on the skin and moisturizing, which is good. Should only last a couple of days, so I think I'm past that skin fall segment of recovery.
This week I'm going to be doing a bit more vigorous exercising on the elliptical (no arms), and more weight lifting (high reps, super light resistance). I'm still being cautious with arm movements, still don't have the ability to move fast without pec muscle cramping and limited range of motion, but it's getting better each week. If anyone is thinking of doing BA then getting back into competition season right away you are tripping. I don't see anyone being able to gracefully walk or pose until at least 4 months of total recovery, and the gals I've worked with all waited about 8 months.
Pulling shoulder blades back and down is tough still. I still can't raise my arms high and behind my eyebrows. The chest muscles just don't allow it. I'm not going to force it at all.
I love my boobs, and my cleavage is amazing. All of my shirts fit perfectly now. I love how my figure is hourglass and wearing a dress - no matter the cut of it - is so sexy.
The bottom of my breasts have softened and relaxed, but I've still a bit of swelling and tightness in the upper pectorals which is still odd looking to me, but in another month should be greatly reduced.
Mentally, I'm much better. I accept the fact that I will not be ready for the fun exercise and active lifestyle I once had until another 8 weeks (3 months post op!), but this is worth it as far as I can tell so far.
6 weeks post op - recovery finally speeding up
13 May 2014
2 months post
So, in the past few days I've made some big gains in recovery. I still have only 90% left arm range of motion and only about 55% right arm ROM, but upper back and posture is much improved and better.
Still can't use pec muscles for lifting or weight training, I'm totally laying off of that anyway.
The scars are being massaged gently every day am/pm with my scar therapy gel. The left side is much better than the right, but the right pec is the one giving me fits. I ordered two more ounces of the gel on amazon.com (wouldn't you know, as soon as I put it in my cart the price went up 50 cents, lol) and will be doing that for the next 5 months.
Last week I did treatment 3 of IPL for my back and arms. I never realized that was considered cosmetic surgery. Between the boobs and the newly improved skin I am feeling much better about myself over all.
Was checking out Angelina Jolie's nose job, and her revamped boobs. This BA for her in 2013 is her second go around (don't believe the hype about how cancer runs in her family. Nice coverup for new boobs). I wish I could have her nose - I think I'm turning into a freak, lol. I love how my body can change, improve, with a medical procedure.
I was able to do jumps in Ballet last night, pirouettes, but holding my arms only at the front. Hopefully, I will be able to start jogging this week! I've got to start doing some serious fat burn workouts. 4 weeks till bikini time.
I'm still pretty obscenely swollen at the top of my pecs. My side boob swelling is gone. It was such a pain having boob into my armpits, and now that that is done what a relief! I started sleeping on my side with a small pillow under my armpit to support the bottom boob. Feels so good!
Those shoulder and back exercises I began last week felt so good. I'm continuing them, still doing leg day too. I'll be splitting up leg day to front and back, and adding more core. I am taking it pretty slow with the resistance training , but was very happy to be able to pull at about 75% of my 1RM. Pushing is still pretty much nihl. Climbing and hanging is a definite no go, with the limited ROM of my arms. No can do on anything overhead. Thank God I can back squat now. Dumbbells are my best new tool in the leg day bag. Just holding them low or goblet style.
Hope all you BAers are doing great! Ask any questions, I hope I can help you out.
on my 8th week of recovery! doing great...
22 May 2014
2 months post
so, feeling much better. By the end of 7 weeks of recovery I'm at about 80% of feeling good. Still have problems with my right pectoral muscles, but everything else is fine. My posture is greatly improved, I can hold a plank and do very light chest work. VERY light.
At the beginning of my 8 weeks of recovery my chest is softer, considerably so! If I don't wear a bra and lay sideways my boobs fall to the side a bit. I still have a lot of muscle swelling, but it all looks round now.
I went to http://www.biggerbras.com/bras-by-bra-size-sitemap.shtml and did a preliminary size chart caluclator. Wweowza, I'm guesstimating myself to be a 32E or 32DD depending on the bra manufacturer. Bigger than I was shooting for. But looks so good!
I got a job last week and at the end of the practical (I'm a CPT) the manager told me I look like I'm in great shape. I really think the boobies fill be out so well up top and give me an hourglass shape, something I did not have before, and make me look so proportional! I'm gaining body fat, since I really haven't been exercising at all! lol.
I think that in another 4 weeks, which will be 3 months post op, I will look normal enough to not be self conscious about wearing a bathing suit in public. I only just recently started revealing my boobs in a tank top at the gym.
I experienced boob hate for the first time:
I went to a bikram yoga class and was told to not come back. what? The owner/instructor claimed that my tank top did not follow the philosophy of the practice. what ever flat chested old crone! lol. My white tank top and very supportive sports bra with my black bike shorts was hardly inappropriate when half the women in there were all wearing nothing but a cami or razor back sports bra and briefs! I honestly have to say I wasn't doing all of the postures since I am going really slow in my arching range of motion, but I absolutely didn't make a scene unless laying on the floor or standing in the preparation posture instead of attempting a full posture is making a scene. My gorgeous chest was pretty noticeable though, and I was the only one with a chest...the other ladies were completely flat. I am either super reading into this matter or it really happened. Anyone else notice people acting different towards you now that you have boobs?
I swear guys are super nice now, and women are more friendly or more bitchy!
went and got a new bra! 32DDD victoria's secret
23 May 2014
2 months post
So, I was super curious about the online measurements and went over to the outlet mall. VS fitting room gal Felicia helped me out. I was just totally honest, telling her I am 8 weeks out from augmentation and she didn't even bat an eye. She did say I'm a 32, 33 and super petite. She gave me two bras to try on...
I tried on 32DD, 32DDD, 34DD and 32 DDD was the best one that felt the most comfortable and supportive. She actually said I would probably be a 32E. OMG!
So, the Flawless VS 32DDD demi cup in ballet pink was purchased. I love it. It is soooo comfortable. I'm wearing it, waiting for husband to come home from work. $17 after tax, I thought I would be spending $50 - oh yeah, outlet. bam.
so happy. More pictures to come this weekend. A comparison of my old 32C bras with my new 32DDD bra would be a great pic. What a difference in cup size. (I used to add cutlets to that bra just to get a fake c cup!, lol)
happy weekend all you BAers!
still worried about limited R arm mobility
I've been scouring the internet and going back over my physiology and kinisiology studies and discovered that my limited R arm mobility over my head, right side pain, and serratus cramping is probably due to a compressed thoratic nerve.
It's not uncommon for patients to get pinched back nerves during surgery, and post operatively since the nerve is pinched any light movement of the arm reaching forward will trigger damage to the serratus! according to this abstract.
which makes me pissed because I do recall how rough it was when I was handled by the nurse when I was moved into the recovery room.
On another note, I had a follow up with the PS and he seems baffled but not concerned at all about my arm situation. This pisses me off.
I got pretty bad stretch mark from the BA, but he has offered to give me fraxel lasering next week in the hopes of reducing them.
3 months post op update - arm slight improvement
20 Jun 2014
3 months post
So, as I told Nikki in my reply below, I'm seeing a specialized chiropractor to pinpoint and hopefully eliminate this pinched nerve causing so much muscle dysfunction. Last week when my neck and mid back, shoulder blade area, was adjusted (OMG, the cracks!) I immedietely recovered full range of motion in my right arm. The pain of using it - pain on r side boob with numbness, r shoulder, r armpit - is still there but lessened.
The PS gave me fraxel lasering to try to knock down the stretch marks I got after the BA. Hurt like a mofo, not like any other lasering I've had via IPL to reverse sun damage. It has left my skin with the texture of sandpaper, or like stingray skin. There are checker board bumps where the laser burned. Hoping that the skin will look alot better in a month.
My boobs are gorgeous! I need to upload some pictures. The Victoria's Secret outlet mall had a size 32 $12.99 sale store wide. I picked up some DD and DDD bras for a song. The Dream Angel is my favorite, and my husband loves it too, "you could be an angel" he said to me this morning before heading off to work.
Physically, because I couldn't do much the first two months post op and I was going insane from the pain and frustrated by my arm paralysis I gained some weight. So, now I've 10 pounds of fat to burn off. ugh. But I look so good! Abs are still there.
My husband took me shopping this weekend for some new outfits. Trying them on for him was fun. He was surprised that boobs "open up an whole new door to fashions for you". Yep. Purchased a halter top romper and a plunging neck line summer gown. Will post pictures tomorrow!
take care fellow BAers!
pain in armpit and arm mobility - doctor's notes
20 Jun 2014
3 months post
Just got back from a chair massage and my chiropractor's office. He says I do have a pinched nerve which is causing the pain, dysfunction of the muscles and R arm mobility problems. musculocutaneous nerve impingement or pinched. Highly suggested lymphatic drainage of the breast, something I will get the husband to do. Found it on you tube and tried it on myself, felt good and makes sense that if I have a blockage under boob and armpit it may be stemming from the pectoral lymph nodes.
Basically go from neck to a clock wise motion around boob, to armpit. Then press into the armpit. Pretty simple. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gr0kqKFMfww#t=14
pictures 11 weeks post op
24 Jun 2014
3 months post
My body by Victoria DD bra, and my old C cup bra:
Here's my before pic of my 32 C cup bra with the inserts. I used two pillows per cup to push up my B sized breasts.
And the after pic of my DDD boobage in the same bra, doesn't even fit. No pillows necessary.
11 weeks post op
24 Jun 2014
3 months post
still have pectoral swelling at top of chest, and now that my husband is really massaging around the boobs to drain and move lymph I'm feeling a lot better! Movement in R arm is back, still drooping a bit and slow with R arm movement though. I was sick after the surgery with a fever, and I feel like today I'm getting that sore throat back. I guess I caught a bug 1 month post op and that really clogged things up. The arm pain did happen immediately after surgery and progressively got worse, but is so much better now with Chiro and massage.
My husband playing with the new additions is no longer painful, and I'm happy he really enjoys them. I am still getting used to them and tried on all my clothes. Many clothes fit great, even better than before. Others are a complete no-go! Off to donate them.
Exercising is now in full force. I can do 2 full pushups, before surgery I could knock out 25 at a time. I haven't tried a pull up yet, but hanging is no problem now. I am going for a massage today and will request a bit more work at R armpit.
They are starting to look much more natural, and round! Beautiful. Time to start painting my body and hanging out at the pool. Hugs BAers!
7 months post op - greatness!
31 Oct 2014
7 months post
I wish I had done this surgery 10 years ago. It has been so awesome, and I have the perfect hourglass, Betty Page body now. I am booking photo shoots a year in advance, and have perfect mobility. I'm constantly getting comments on my perfect body.
Even at 5 months post op they were still a bit puffy below the collar bone, but now they are completely relaxed and jiggly.
The boobage has completely relaxed into a bra cup, and I do wear a bra to bed at night to prevent the side boob slippage into the armpit that is occurring if I don't wear a bra.
Once I got my husband to massage my breasts more often and focused on lymph drainage my pinched nerve problem disappeared and full range of motion without pain by month 5 changed my life for the better.
The breasts have settled into a beautifully full DD, but I can still fill a DDD cup with no problem, but they fall much more naturally now and jiggle. The stretch marks are still there, the fraxel lasering knocked them down a bit, and I use stage makeup to smooth out the tops of the boobs when wearing a corset for photo shoots. No problems.
I dance, move, exercise, sleep, jump... all fine. In some aspects I actually move better because of the added confidence.
My mother is beaming with pride at "her beautiful daughter" and never noticed the giant improvement in my cup size as anything unnatural. lol. I always knew she was narcissistic and delighted in showing me off but had no idea that she was so fixated on my looks to boost her ego. Now she wants to touch me, hug me, and be with me all the time. Freaky and I'm constantly setting boundaries with her. Nothing I can't handle, but very glad that she is too mental to even realize that I had boob augmentation. I can't believe how much nicer everyone treats me! I'm constantly being told how beautiful I am. Well, $4k boobs to be beautiful? Who'da thought? They are large, but perfectly proportionate to my body. If I want to push them up for a naughty look I can, but I can also tape them down and place petals over the nipples and go braless under a dress for dancing.
Very worth it and I never realized how boobs make you popular. I have achieved the perfect hourglass shape I've always wanted. And my husband loves them.
fyi about swelling
31 Oct 2014
7 months post
my breast swelling did not start to look natural and completely disappear until recently! Month 7 is when I can say I actually look normal. My corset picture here is at 6 months, and I still have a bit of swelling. The corset pushes the boobs up nicely, and without the corset that is pretty much how they look! lol. At month 7 they don't sit so high, but are still perky. They are relaxing, and I do wear support all the time now.
7 months post op - burning? pain?
17 Nov 2014
8 months post
http://www.realself.com/review/Breast-implants-Extreme-Pain-3-years-after-breast-augmentation oh wow. scary reviews there.
I'm doing great but have to say my implants are so heavy that they hurt. A burning does happen under the muscle in the implant pocket if I put too much pressure on them or if I'm sleeping on my side with out wearing a bra. I'm hoping that it's just a result of my weight lifting. I recover about 4 - 5 days after heavy chest day workouts to make sure that the muscles and the attachments are all healing up really well.
The breasts look great and my husband and I absolutely love them. While I am very happy I did this, I do wish I had gone slightly smaller. I am a DDD cup and did not intend to be that big. That is over seven times more full than I previously was and I'm still getting used to them.
I absolutely know that people treat me much better with boobs than they did without them. Complete strangers tell me "you're hot" and "gorgeous". I've never had that before and it's totally creepy.
I am happy that I did this because I enjoy dressing up and wearing clothes that make me look like the woman I've always felt like. I am really surprised at how many people in my life react to them, and while most of the attention is fun, the people in my life who matter to me most reacted in a way I never ever imagined; my best friend became distant and treats me like I killed someone, my husband has really enjoyed them far more than he ever did, my parents gush about my beauty, my business peers tell me that I'm in the best shape ever physically...I really had no idea that looks were so f'kn important! What a psychological eye opener! A lot more has happened to me after this BA than I ever thought or planned for.