I had Vaser Lipo to my lower & upper abdomen,...
Very early morning 6 a.m on Post Op Day 2 ..
Anyway, now with the op being over, I would have liked to do a proper update - i.e. details about the operation itself, my post-op drinking/eating/sleeping/medication-taking, etc., but it's very uncomfortable and painful to sit in an upright position, for very long, so this will have to be a quickie, to be updated with more info as I start to feel better. And I have managed to take a very crummy picture, to upload, which is just to give a general idea, but I will post better ones soon.
Today I went back to the clinic - they want you there the day after the operation, to clean you up & change your bandages & help you put on clean new spare compression garment so I could wash my other one when I got back home, and check how you are getting on. The appointment, just like last time, was with one of their excellent nurses (I'm seeing my Plastic Surgeon on the 12th,so that's just 5 days post-op, which is a VAST improvement compared to last time .... which is good since i'm just about done complaining about anything else now!!) The nurse removed my compression garment and my bulletproof police vest, as I affectionately like to call this instrument of pure torture (3D state of the art supertight foam vest with a stiff board inserted over abdomen). Nurse's reaction was very positive and complimentary about the results. I couldn't really see properly, as there were no mirrors in the room and I was lying down anyway so i just lifted up my head slightly and saw ...... a flat stomach for the first time in my life (well since probably I was 3 years old I guess) and then had to lie down again, as my back and abdomen are in a lot of pain and discomfort. Last time I had the operation, I remember that I didn't see any good result even on post-op Day 1, and was told it that was due to my swelling up very quickly. ....... I now realise that the job just hadn't been done properly. This was a very different stomach than the one I saw last time around. A million trillion times different.
When i got home after the clinic, I removed everything so that I could have my shower, stood in the mirror, and was ... amazed. It was post-op Day 1 in the evening, and already I could see that suddenly... No MORE Great-big-monstrous-potbelly Frankenstein-creation-Lumpy-Bumpy-Scarred Disgusting-Freakshow-Stomach ... all gone .... and replaced by .... OH WOW ... Flat stomach -- no bumps or lumps, almost... perfect??? .... must be dreaming ... -- that was in the short space of time that I was able to take my garment & vest off to have a shower last night. I didn't look at myself for very long as I was so worried about putting back on properly the whole damn kit and kaboodle of bulletproof vest (that fastens at the BACK, of course, just to be super awkward !!) and compression garment (try squeezing those hooks together when it's got a nappy underneath to catch drainage fluid, plus a big foam 3D vest!!!). So I didn't take any other pictures, but shall hopefully be able to take more in next few days.
I shall try to upload the one I took - it's not very clear and is a mess of bandages and nappy parts so, not terribly attractive, but when I put my 'Before' picture up next to it tomorrow, or as soon as I can, you hopefully will be able see the difference. So far, it's been tiring and painful but if my stomach stays as it looked today, no scars lumps or bumps and all flattened out, then I will be able to say this has been a successful revision. But it is super early days yet, so all of that is yet to come. Fingers crossed!
Oh and if someone can tell me how to put paragraph breaks in revisions and comments, I'd be most grateful!
Post-Op Day 1 - Photo
Update Pic 9 Dec 2013
More Pics From 9 Dec (2 days post)
Then finally during my Revision Operation the Surgeon sucked out the excess fibrous tissue which the seroma had turned into once it had healed, and removed the lumpy scar tissue that had formed around it.
I am totally happy with that now ... A bit of discolouration (which will fade), I can live with --. NOT the monstrous thing I had there before.
Correction re: Seroma (previous update)
Attached are a couple of pics, taken about a month after my original vaser lipo op in May, that show what it looked like after the seroma had been drained of fluid and turned into a lump of fibrous tissue, and in the meantime had left my the area scarred and disfigured.
Will be posting more in future, and also posting pics to show the operation result (a terrible failure), as I was left with a messed- up stomach (both internally and externally), with a weird protruding pot belly formation full of residual fat and lumps.
Day 3 Post-Op
So it hasn't been a lot of fun.
Have been trying to continue drinking of fluids, to re-hydrate and to help rid my body of all the stuff they pumped into me which is still in my body and hasn't been 'drained out' out through the little taps in my stomach. (of which I am very squeamish, so quick change of subject..!)
Since the op, have found it very hard to concentrate on the things I normally enjoy when I am chilling out; I'm no longer living on adrenaline which had kicked in due to whole experience of operation, getting used to the painful compression, etc,so I'm just left with a lot of discomfort.
I've started about 5 books but unable to stick to one - and that's really saying something, as I'm a MAJOR book worm - which proves how my concentration levels are shot to hell. I can't even concentrate on a movie. but that happened last time too, and I'll have to wait for it to pass.
Today, my body finally started fighting for its need for sleep, and refused to let me do much more than lie around in a daze/a doze. Between the drop in adrenaline, and the hours & hours of sleep I need to catch up on, I have barely been able to keep my eyes open all day. Luckily today I didn't have a clinic aftercare appointment, so I could stay home and chill.
My friend had planned to pop by and see how I was doing, and we'd planned to take a little stroll to my nearest cafe for a chat and to help me distract myself from the pain and awful discomfort, but in the end my body was having NONE of it, and refused to co-operate in any way when I started to try to get dressed.
I was just too exhausted, even my digits were exhausted from texting to cancel apologetically. I had to explain that I couldn't make it and that we'd have to leave it for another time, as today was a wash out.
So I spent the entire time dozing on and off.
I am not surprised my concentration levels are up the spout.
I am trussed up really tightly this time, (last time I just had a simple compression garment, without a heavy foam vest which makes moving about really awkward and painful), And also it is VERY difficult for me psychologically, I realise, to go through this agony yet again, when I just went through the same thing in May.
Very hard to accept.
However, I keep telling myself it is worth it.
Also, it hasn't been great for my general 'germ and cleanliness' OCD - I shower at least twice a day, it's verging on pathological. Now, every time I have to take a shower the whole thing is an absolute PALAVER and a half, i'm always scared of tearing stiches open, being able to replace all my bandages correctly and then scared of being able to put the whole contraption on properly again afterwards.
It's important that the vest and garment are placed correctly or I could end up with permanent creases and folds, which I am DETERMINED (as are the clinic and my Surgeon) to prevent, due to what happened during my last operation.
Post Op Days 1 and 2 were mainly: drinking like a fish (and peeing like you would not believe which is good, better to flush all the toxins out). Intravenous sedation dehydrates you, I was told - I had local first time around and wasn't drinking gallons like this. And apart from that, have had very little appetite.
And living in a weird time warp since i still had sedatives, anaesthetic, floating around my body, so not really 'with it' at all and unable to get any sleep except tiny naps lasting 1 or 2 hours each.
Having to go to the clinic 2 days in the row was exhausting for Post Op Day 1 and 2 (I had to go there for bandage changing and to start aftercare massage), mostly because of having to use public transport - a MAJOR feat in itself, as you are having to constantly dodge a bunch of xmas shoppers/tourists/workers on their lunch break, depending on what time my appointment is, and the trains are so stiflingly hot, that I spend the entire journey worrying that I'm going to faint.
Plus it's not a supershort journey, having to change tube lines twice, and both changes having lots of escalators and passageways in between, which I have to shuffle through like some extra from a horror film re: the living dead , because I can't walk any faster due to being all trussed up and compressed, and everything I do is slowed down by about twice and getting myself to the clinic now takes me an extra 20 mins/half hour which I have to factor in.
They have me booked in for my aftercare sessions all the way up to Christmas.
So all in all, my body felt battered and blue today and really needed a good rest.
Tonight I have another shower, which is such a procedure, but I cannot go a day without showering, so I just have to suck it up and tell myself that the more I get used to my new procedure, the easier it will get.
Tomorrow and the next day I have aftercare appointments at the clinic - No rest for the wicked as they say!!
All in all a hard day, but mainly cos of the pain, and also got emotional and had a couple of hissy fits wondering "Why did I ever do this to myself in the first place, I'm such a dumb a***!!!!!" and all that. Which is perfectly normal, and happened to me the first time around too.
I've also found that today my swelling has started, but mainly on my legs so I have lovely sausage thighs. this is also probably cos I haven't moved all day, but I'll be making up for that when I got to my app.ments since, from the time I get to the clinic and out of the underground, I've probably walked a whole mile as it is.
It's hard but you just need to ride it out until things start to feel better and you start to feel at least a little more comfortable, if not fantastic, which is better than 'in constant agony'.
Pity I can't distract myself with movies/books because of my atrocious concentration span (normally i can lose myself in a book or movie for hours on end), but then there has been a LOT going on in my life over the last 8 months, this being the major climax of the whole experience, so it's understandable that I'm not 100% compos mentis .... and will just have to deal. C'est la vie as they say.
Also, this site is invaluable in letting you know that there are plenty of others like you who are feeling the same - especially if you haven't many friends or family to confide in about the op. I'm so glad it's around, as it's really helped me get through this op, both times around.
Sorry for rambling -- was not intendig to write an entire novel. Was supposed to be a quickie update. Oh well!
And So The Swelling Begins....
So, now I have lovely sausage legs & ankles and a big fat face, which, together with my super heavy foam policeman vest, make me look and feel like a beached whale. I can't bear to look at myself.
Today, after another night of no sleep, I felt lousy to be honest.
I'm just wiped out, and the pain is still scary when the painkillers wear off, so I have to keep talking myself out of silly panic attacks, since I can be such a BIG baby and start imagining all sorts of things that can go wrong, etc. etc.
I think I'm just overwhelmed mentally and physically by all that's been going on, and the stress associated with taking the risk of having a revision with the same Surgeon (although luckily it turned out to be the right choice).
Also, it's still very hard for my body to accept having to go through this pain and discomfort all over again after just 8 months....
At lunchtime I dragged myself over to the clinic for another aftercare session.
It's not far from where I live, but each time I go it feels like I'm setting off on a journey to another country, it's so ridiculously slow and long winded because I can't rush along but have to walk very carefully and slowly.
Today the idiot train driver decided not to wait for the 'walking impediment' girl to enter the train all the way, but to close the doors on her bag instead. Thanks, mate. Really needed that. *Sigh.* Luckily two helpful guys helped untangle me, at which point the train took off and I nearly went flying. Annoying or what.
Okay, okay - totally my fault for rushing for the train. You just CAN'T rush, in this condition, I keep telling myself. Maybe next week, but for now I gotta take it easy.
The aftercare sesh was with my very favourite nurse who's an absolute angel, and who became a precious friend and comfort to me during my whole seroma & botched lipo 'drama' and was the one who saved me from being scarred for life with her magical massages and laser therapy.
She gave me the standard aftercare session, of manual lymphatic drainage massage, followed by more massage with the ultrasound machine, which apparently breaks down scar tissue/aids healing and helps keep everything nice and flat and smooth.
Right now, all incisions are healing very fast, and brusing is minimal.
Afterwards, I stopped off to look at some shops re: xmas presents, but didn't hang around much since I had been strapped back into my foam vest so tight after my aftercare, that I felt like i was going to break in two if I didn't get home and lie down.
So anyway, not a great day, I'll be honest; felt very demotivated and down.
Maybe cos it's all getting so chrismassy (if that's even an adjective?) everywhere and I don't really have any great plans, although I should be happy that at least I got my stomach 'fixed' in time for my birthday & Christmas.
Took some more photos, and have posted a few to show to show progress so far.
Back to clinic again tomorrow for after care and for my first post-op check up with the Plastic Surgeon.
Thursday 12th December
Good job I stocked up on books and magazines. Today had to shuffle along to the clinic again. Okay I'm really not doing well here, the swelling is close to intolerable.
Luckily it hasn't hit my precious flat stomach yet ! I'll be devastated when that happens, as it's the only thing that can possibly make this pain worthwhile.
Infact my entire torso is still intact, and that's probably because I am strapped so tight inside my foam vest, that there simply is nowhere for me to expand.
My legs however are a different matter, however, as are my feet and ankles.
It makes it very difficult as it feels like I am dragging an enormous body around that doesn't belong to me and which feels completely alien. This operation is truly an exercise in patience (a virtue which, I will admit, I am severely lacking at the best of times. So this is driving me crazy.
At the clinic I had my stitches taken out and also had my drains taken out (I had two, one on either side of my lower abdomen). Stitches stung a bit, the drains didn't hurt all, the nurse was very gentle with everything as she always is.
I'm glad the drains are out, it always made me squeamish having taps coming out my stomach like that. I had to just pretend they weren't here.
Now I can lie on my stomach without stabbing myself with those horrible drains, which will be nice!
Then my Plastic Surgeon came to see me; he checked everything, and was satisfied with results so far, and was above all very pleased to see that I was thrilled with what a great job he has done on my stomach.
He's not a bad person really, just very unreliable in some instances and a little too over positive, confident and blase' about things that he should take more seriously e.g. my seroma which grew to gigantic proportions thanks to him, and a bunch of other stuff he just either forgot or didn't have time for. He's going to be very different this time around, I'll be making sure of that, and so will the clinic, if they don't want my medical negligence team on their case.
At least he saw me on Day 5 as opposed to Day 15 like last time, which was a very wrong, as he knew I was having complications post-op, and yet had not seen me at all since the operation date, not a single tiny check up, but just phone calls telling me that everything would be fine and that I shouldn't worry, etc etc etc - and by then my seroma had grown enormous and when it healed, it had caused such damage which took more than 10 weeks of twice-a-week sessions of MLD plus ultrasound massage followed by extremely painful carboxy laser therapy, to get that area looking remotely human again.
So there have been quite a few changes put in place this time around - I made certain of that. Unfortunately in life sometimes you have to get stroppy and complain to people 100 times if you want anything done.
Luckily the atmosphere is back to normal between us, with the usual joking and banter that was there before I started laying into him big time and sending super long stroppy emails threatening to sue him and his clinic, with pics attached & all the rest of it.
If I hadn't done all that they would have sat back and done nothing.
Instead I got the whole thing again for free, including anaesthetist fee, plus I even got a free area on top (bra rolls) 10 aftercare sessions (and that's only up to xmas when the clinic closes for hols, so there may be some more depending on how I'm doing), and 2 sets compression garments.
So anyway, in terms of my healing, everything is progressing nicely, which is good to know. Incisions practically all closed up now, and the little bruising I had is fading rapidly.
He left saying asking to schedule another appointment to check on me in another couple of weeks, I then had MLD and ultrasound massage (all gentle & relaxing, if a little painful in some areas, which is normal, especially stomach and sides) then I left to take the arduous tube journey back home.
Luckily was not rush hour, or workers lunch hour, which makes for a much more pleasant journey but i was really not feeling too great, I'm getting the 'feverish' spells which I got last time around, and which is mentioned in the info pack given out by the clinic, as a side effect which is common and really nothing to worry about, apparently. Just very unpleasant.
When I got home, the swelling had really gone to town on me, since I'd done a lot of walking, and i seriously could not recognise my ankles and feet. Woah, I am like ultra, ultra, repulsive with great huge ankles. No scratch that - i haven't actually got any ankles any more - they've gone, swallowed up by the swellling so my legs and feet are all connected in one big fat straight line.
Well there was no way I was going to do anything for the rest of the day, I'd gone to tesco's for a bunch of stuff already and though I needed to get in a bunch of extra water, I decided I'll treat myself to an Ocado delivery soon, as it's just too heavy for me to drag back to my flat, and if I do an Ocado I can get like 3 x packs of 1.5 litre bottles of Evian, so shall be sorted, since I do drink a lot, but due to the swelling I need to drink a WHOLE lot more.
So i spent the rest of the evening drinking like a fish, trying to pee the swelling out and just trying to relax and stop worrying about my swelling being somehow 'not right' and were my legs just going to keep going and going til they exploded?
Seriously I was that worried. I have enormous sausage ankles and feet that are quite scary to look at. I got this last time I did the op, but I don't remember swelling this much.
Mind you I was told that when you do a revision, the recovery can be more difficult/longer/more painful, for various reasons, so I will just have to suck it up.
Rest of night spent as usual in trying to sleep but eventually giving up and catching a few cap naps between reading and surfing junk on the internet.
Friday 13th December
I could barely walk today. Never had such awful swelling before.
But it's apparently the body's normal response to a big trauma (like an operation) and I'll have to see it through. I think this time around is worse because it's my second op in just 8 months; plus it's the exact same procedure too, so my body is probably finding it more of a challenge to bounce back.
I didn't have very long to recover from the last op before being stabbed black and blue on that operaton table all over again, plus there was a lot of scar tissue he had to remove along with the fat - my body is no doubt finding all this double onslaught quite difficult to deal with.
Today no clinic aftercare, which was a relief to be honest as I still feel lousy. I spent the day in bed/on sofa with my legs raised up on cushions which helped a lot but only as a temporary measure, since the moment I started pottering around the house doing chores they just started inflating again.
I'm on my own at home so doing the even the simplest everyday necessities without someone giving you hand, has been a strain, even just to load the blasted washing machine.
Managed to get about 3 or 4 hours sleep early evening, which is an improvement on the usual 2 hr nap, and felt a little better after that.
Am still in a LOT of pain, especially when getting up from a sitting position and any sudden movements - everything pinches and pulls and aches - back, flanks, sides, stomach. Hence why I haven't been updating this reveiw as much as I would've liked to! By the time I get up off my chair and off my laptop, my legs are ready to give way underneath me. It's okay, it will get better.
Still drinking loads of water, trying to force myself to pee the swelling out of my system, and still not much appetite.
Diet wise I am trying to stick to eating as healthy as possible, since I don't want to feel even worse by feeding my food anything with too much salt, or just feeding my food with junk full stop. Cooking is out of the question - I can't even bear the idea of making soup, since it means standing in front of a saucepan and stirring it, that's too much effort, when I could be eating something easier. I mean, my stomach just does not want to know, right now.
So I am basically sticking to very simple foods for now since it's my first week and I'm letting myself off anything more ambitious in terms of cooking/decent meals, which consists of brown bread, cold chicken breast, low fat cheddar cheese, salads and tomatoes. Not a fabulously varied or exciting regime, i know, but my stomach is very fussy right now and can only take small amounts at a time.
This is why I ensure I eat protein, as it fills me up far longer than carbs do so I'm not wandering around starving to death but unable to eat.
My weight since the op has been a bit like a yo-yo... I went up about 3 kgs straight after the operation which is normal since you are pumped full of stuff; I expected to stay at that weight for a while, but infact was pleased to see I'd dropped exactly 3 kgs, two days later.
However, then the swelling kicked in and my weight soared again!! Not surprising really, considering these elephant legs, they must weight 10 kgs each!!!
Still minimal swelling on my stomach and back/flanks area, but that is obviously because of the vest & garment leaving me no room to expand there at all. Good.
I would hate to see my stomach increase in size like my legs and ankles have done, it would depress me big time!
My intention during this initial recovery period is to keep weight as low as possible, but not go overboard or too paranoid about dieting, as I need proper nutrients to heal, especially at the beginning.
More than anything else, I am so looking forward to be able to wear my usual clothes, and (hopefully) see how much looser everything is; I just want to go out in a nice top and skinny jeans/skirt and boots instead of looking like a slob in a big puffa jacket and tracksuit bottoms and uggs.
It just makes me feel like nothing's changed about my body, since I only get to see my new stomach it in the short interval between garment removal and my evening shower. I would feel so much more motivated if I could feel it during the day, and wear something flattering instead of loose dark clothes. Never mind, we press on and we persevere...
Huge Improvement - Sat 14th December
That's a relief. Even if it's just a temporary improvement, it's better than nothing.
Another big improvement - my pain has reduced a lot, I was very amazed at how quickly that got better, seemingly overnight, as all day yesterday i was stil in a lot of pain and discomfort without taking painkillers.
Now I only feel the odd twinge here and there, but it's perfectly tolerable, and I'm virtually painfree. I ALMOST feel human, infact. I was able to make my journey to the clinic for my aftercare a lot more easily, and was not shuffling along/limping like quasimodo's sister. Such a relief, as I hated seeing all these wretched xmas shoppers rushing around me whilst I could only walk along at 0.0005 miles per hour feeling very self conscious.
So today has been a real improvement! I hope thing just keep getting better from now.
Aftercare appointment was my fave nurse, some gentle MLD and ultrasound massage and then checking over my various incision/drain sites to see that everything is going smoothly. So far so good.
Updated 21st Dec - 14 Days Post-Op
Luckily the lumps don't bother me too much physically in terms of pain/discomfort - but the swelling is another matter altogether.
The swelling had been my main problem over the past week or so, my legs and feet got so fat I could barely walk. Luckily the discomfort has gone and swelling greatly diminished & they look a bit more presentable - albeit still dreadfuly puffy and chubby and gross compared to before. And my ankles came back! What a relief to see them again!
However, as soon as my legs/ankles/feet were better, the swelling started in my stomach and hip area 2 days ago (I'd always thought the swelling was supposed to go downwards; but in my case I'm either just weird, or I reckon the top half of my body swelling up was delayed by the sheer tightness of my bullet proof vest), and it's caused me much more discomfort as I have compression garment & vest squeezing me and the swelling is fighting to get past it and there is just no room for it go.
Not a very pleasant sensation at all. On my Vaser Lipo Operation No. 1 in May I didn't have the bullet proof vest, just a compression garment, and it was completely different, I remember feeling very bloated and in pain and squeezed dreadfully tight, especially in the evenings, but I never suffered this much painful pressure and tightness (caused by policeman vest PLUS comp garment on top), to the point where I just can't find a good position, to relax in, or to sleep because everything hurts so bad and I feel like I might spontaneously combust.
Never mind, as long as I get results, that's the main thing.
Since I have to wear both garments 24 hours a day, I'll just have to grin and bear it. Well maybe grin is not quite the right word. 'Grimace' would be about right.
I feel like the Michelin man on steroids, and lying on bed, sideways, on my back, on my stomach or sat upright on my sofa, are all positions that I can sustain for only about 20 mins before i have to switch because the garment starts pressing down on me and I feel like a ten ton truck's just parked on top of me. Not very pleasant.
Also it's a little (.......OK, it's VERY) disheartening to see your waistline and thighs expand in the space of a week/few days, especially when you are watching your diet like a hawk, avoiding salt/sodium rich foods like the PLAGUE, and going to the clinic for massages every single day, hence getting plenty of exercise since by the time I get to the clinic I've walked miles.
I think I've only had 3 or 4 days' break since I started the aftercare massages after the Revision Operation, so it's getting rather tiring but I am grateful to the clinic for letting me do this for free, as the ultrasound & MLD are really not cheap at all and I'd be stone broke by now if I had to pay.
Still i'm looking forward to the xmas period when they close -- it will be an enforced break for me which I don't have to feel guilty about, since I have no choice in the matter if they're not open until after New Year.
Stomach is now developing those horrid lumps I remember so well from last time I had the op, and I'll just have to keep up the self-massaging and hope for the best. I believe this is the point when things started going wrong for me during Vaser Lipo Operation No. 1 which I had in May earlier this year, so I have to make a concerted effort to keep on top of things.
I have my 2nd post-op check up with my Surgeon tomorrow, so I hope he will be pleased with the results so far, and that he can confirm that all is going smoothly with my recovery so far, and have nothing to worry about.
Apart from that, I'm just very tired. The whole upkeep of the Vaser op aftercare is getting on top of me now, since I've done this op twice in a row, and I'm feeling a bit exhausted keeping on top of things, such as making sure I always remember to chuck my garment in the washing machine at the end of the day, and have a fresh one ready for me from the night before; wiping down my vest with baby wipes since I was only given one and I can't wash it and leave it to dry overnight as I need to wear it 24/7; and then (as directed by my surgeon), rubbing my torso, back and legs with organic lotion, which then adds another 20 mins to my shower ritual, since after applying it I have to wait around for it to fully absorb, otherwise my garments are a vile sticky mess if I put them back on straight away. So I have to faff around half naked finding stuff to do whilst I wait for it to dry; all i can say is, I'm lucky to have such a warm flat.
No more news, other than tomorrow being my b'day and I have no plans since I just don't feel up to it.
And also, have added a few new pictures taken yesterday, 20th Dec (13 days post op).
As you can see, they are rather different from ones previous to these, as in: (a) I have expanded to pig-like proportions and (b) my stomach is Lump City.
But I need to keep up the updates on this review, as I promised myself I would, so ......ugly puffy or not, I have to upload them.
And when the swelling goes down, and I put up new pics where I am not lump-city chubby-tummy anymore, it will cheer me to see myself shrinking in comparison.
Second Post-Op Check-Up With Plastic Surgeon
You can't even imagine how liberating that feels - just to imagine being able to walk around without all that extra bulk. Now I definitely will have something to celebrate on New Year's Eve ! You cannot even believe how this thing has made the recovery so much more difficult and uncomfortable, so i am thrilled to bits that I 'graduate' to my secondary stage garment very very soon.
As much as I curse the vest, it has I believe done a lot to help keep my stomach really flat and the swelling down, so I'm grateful for that. But I still freakin hate the thing!
Today I had my last Aftercare session before the clinic closes for Christmas & New Year - which means I get to have a bit of a break from traipsing along those marvellous underground escalators jampacked with xmas shoppers. Oh how I shall NOT miss that. Made worse of course because I been feeling awkward since I could only shuffle along at tortoise speed levels, and that's totally NOT allowed on the tube, in any area, you are regarded as the antichrist or something if you dare slow them down.
Luckily I've noticed my pace has picked up a lot over the last 2 days and I've actually been feeling almost - dare I say it - human again. I feel like I'm finally starting to get back to my old self.
However, I still feel really really lousy whenever I wake up, aching everywhere, but other than that, I've had 2/3 days where my energy levels are almost back to normal, and that's a relief.
Today's aftercare session was my usual ultrasound and manual massage and then the nurse put me in the 'Trousers' as my fave nurse calls them i.e. a contraption which carries out lymphatic drainage massage all over your body automatically, and is basically an enormous pair of plastic trousers hooked up to a machine, which you slide into and lie down while it massages your legs, feet, lower back and torso.
Freaky stuff, but really effective. I've been given that treatment twice now, and each time when i got home honestly my legs felt as light as a feather compared to before, they were so less swollen. I don't know what the machine/treatment is called, but would definitely recommend it and could find out if anyone's interested.
Today during my massage the nurse who did my aftercare, who I've only met a few times before, kept commenting on my waist and was quite in awe at 'how tiny' it was. That made me feel SO happy.
After all the stress I went through when the first op went wrong, and everything afterwards, it just felt like i'd suddenly 'arrived' and was on my way to achieving my aim against all odds, - to have a flat stomach and a slim waist - and which had seemed impossible before. It gave me a real feeling of positivity which I desperately needed. Now I look forward to relaxing a little.
My Dr said that after I 'graduate' from my vest, I can start exercising, but just light jogging first, so I shall have a little think about that as exercise is going to really help results and keep everything nice and toned.
Freedom At Last ... From The Wretched Bullet Proof Vest ! + Progress Pics
After 3 weeks of torturing me digging into my skin and weighing me down, creating bl**dy great grooves into my poor swollen back, it's over now. I finally made it to the end. Now - thank you God, I can lie around and sit around and actually FEEL comfortable - an impossible feat so far. It feels amazing.
Right now I'm just sat in my negligee and knickers just to give my skin a breather before putting on my Stage 2 Garment -- and it feels amazing and so liberating. Wow.
Also, I can feel my flat stomach now, whenever I like, and touch my sides and appreciate how the Doc tapered me nicely and gave me a natural shape. I couldn't do that before - I couldn't touch anything ! All I felt was thick foam and NO SHAPE whatsoever.
If you see the pictures attached below, you will see why for 3 weeks I never really had a feeling of 'real' excitement about seeing the end results, because for 24/7 it didn't 'feel' like I'd had anything done at all. I looked in the mirror and all i'd see was a hulking great ugly silhouette. I was just this great big bulky rectangular shape waddling around like a big fat duck.
Woah, what a relief that at last I can start to appreciate the results of all the pain and discomfort of recovery that I've been through so far - the lack of sleep, the not being able to eat more than tiny baby bird portions of food, the inability to wear my usual clothes as opposed to hiding under very unflattering baggy bulky clothes... and there's a lot more pain and suffering to come, and a HUGE need for patience, but at least it'll be minus that wretched straitjacket! I won't be officially 'cooked' (to quote Judge Judy!) until I get to at least 5 months so I'm very very early days.
Now as per Dr's instructions I get to wear a very simple Spanx type garment, which just ends a top of my thighs (so no more compression garment cutting me off at the knees, which prob contributed to those awful CANKLES).
Since the clinic is closed, I have bought my own garment, one from Debenhams, and which fits like a dream. Just feels like a second skin, no pulling no bulky foam making every tiny movement awkward.
So I'm sat around this evening grinning like a Cheshire cat who just go out of prison. Seriously, it was that bad. I actually weighed it - weighed myself while it was on, then removed it and compared the weight when i got back on the scales. damn thing weights half a kilo.
OK, a pound is not A HUGE amount, but I it feels pretty significant when that weight is distributed around a very sensitive area of your body which has had the same operation back-to-back with not much of a breather in between. If feels pretty lousy, let me tell you. The grooves it's left in my back and sides are really something scary. Unfortunately they just don't come out well when I take a photo, so I can't show on here how gross they are and how it was really ravaging my skin.
Of course, if it's contributed towards my getting a good result in the end and having a relatively smooth recovery, then yeah I'm glad I wore it, but jeez wearing that thing 24/7 except for 20 mins after my shower, and not just that but with a supertight knee length garment on top of it .... well, it wasn't much fun I can assure you and I am looking forward to perhaps being able to sleep more than 2 or 3 hours max.
Also, just from an aesthetic point of view, now I'll finally start appreciating the way I look right now, and my new slimline torso.
Because, as you can see from the photos attached I've been so bulked up i just haven't had a change to even appreciate having a flat stomach (for the first time since i was, I don't know about 5 years old maybe), no bra rolls, and a nice natural shape to my waist. Cos if I ever touched my sides or looked in the mirror, all I saw and felt was great padded shapeless foam. That has not really motivated me much, but now that it's all gone and I have my new garment I am hoping to start getting a lot more motivation in general as opposed to feeling almost fed up and indifferent about it. Being able to wear my own clothes will make a HUGE difference as well.
Because of the vest-compression garment combo, nothing would fit except baggy jumper and trousers with an elasticated waist. And definitely no heels.
Now i can wear my little skirts and my tops and my cute shoes and boots, and I can start to appreciate how much better they fit compared to before, and I can't WAIT to start trying all my stuff on, and just going out and feeling like a normal person instead of just like some slob who's always wearing joggers and uggs like I can't be a*sed to change into anything more attractive cos I'm a lazy as* slobbo woman.
Ah, yes, also I found out why I was getting CANKLES (mmm i really don't like that word, but that's what they are) - I had a very short period of a few days when my legs, ankles and feet were super swollen and that lasted very short time and then they went completely back to normal.
Well, to my horror, my cankles made a reappearance last week. Shock horror.
So I understood immediately, that inactivity = CANKLES.
And I mean total inactivity. Basically I hadn't moved my butt in about 4 days during the Christmas period because I was so depressed (this for a reason entirely separate from my Vaser operation, by the way), and miserable and low that I just couldn't bring myself to even leave the house.
Well, lo and behold after a couple of days I look down and I have heels like a baby elephant. Grotesque. So I realised that yes, I have to move, even if just walking for an nour or so around the block or whatever, otherwise my blood circulation just stagnates and I swell up like a balloon.
So I was out yesterday and was walking around quite a bit, and whattaya know, the next day the dreaded cankles are gone! So I have learnt my lesson. OK to be miserable and depressed, whatever, but I have to move around no matter what.
Especially as I have a NYE party coming up, and I can assure you I'm not going to a NYE party with CANKLES !!!!
Then after new year, as per my Dr's instructions, I will start to do slightly more strenuous exercise, like jogging . Right now I feel like I probably couldn't be able to make it to the nearest lamp post, I have become so unfit, because of all this business of 2 operations, and 2 recovery periods. Maybe I'll do the couch to 5k programme, or something; main thing is that I do move I need to get the circulation moving - also my legs and bum are getting flabby and that's just NOT allowed. I need firming up quite desperately due to not working out for such a long time - in the new year I intend to tackle that.
Will also post some pics of my progress, which I took yesterday.
Re: my progress, I am generally pleased with everything so far;obvious at just 3 weeks I am aware that I'm going to look puffy, especially compared to Day 2, but that's just par for the course in this game and entirely to be expected in Vaser recovery.
So I better get used to it.
I've been through this before, remember? This swelling shall will hanging around for a good long time, and I'm not expecting to 'deflate' any time soon, oh no. When I did my first Vaser op in May, it took me 6 months to finally be completely 100% unswollen. Right now I'm about Day 23 - just over 3 weeks - so as you can see, I have long old wait ahead of me!!
Progress Updated (cont'd) from 30th Dec (23 Days Post-Op)
Progress Updated (cont'd) from 30th Dec (23 Days Post-Op)
Progress Update (cont'd) from 30th Dec (23 Days Post-Op) re: Final Freedom from Police Vest!
Progress Update 5 Weeks Post-Op: Swelling, Lumps & Heffer Hips Galore
br> Main reasons are, I've have had a lot of stuff going on, both good and bad in my 'real life', plus have been feeling very under the weather for the past week - but for reasons separate from the Vaser op (gyno problems --- obviously I shall spare everyone the details, as they're prettty distasteful and TMI).
Actually the gyno probs could be connected to the operation, but at 6 weeks later, i doubt it. I think I'm just feeling very run down and this has affected my hormones, which are extremely delicate creatures in my case, and sent my whole monthly cycle beserk and out of whack.
So, have been feeling rotten and it's TYPICAL bad timing, since it happens just as I meet a new super-hot bloke, and on our first night out together this superhot bloke made a trillion remarks about my slim waist and what a fab figure I have.
Yeah, some of you may thinking "Yeah the usual stuff guys say, so what's the big deal ...???... " but actually, Ermmm that is something that has not happened to me since at least 5/6 years ago, maybe more.
And especially not from someone who is, himself, incredibly fit (he is ex army, and now fitness instructor & manager of 2 fitness clubs) ... so when he says I have a fabulous figure, I just don't know WHERE to look -- because personally, in the mirror I justs see a fat swolllen lumpy mess.
Am flabbergasted that he thinks I'm remotely attractive when the guy is obviously on a daily basis, at work, seeing 100's of superhot chicks wearing their sexy workout gear in his fitness clubs every single day -- and these girls probably hitting on him every single day as well (he's very good looking as well as having a supertoned sixpack superhot body). Ah well. C'est un mystere.
So our second date has had to be postponed, cos my body has been a pain in the butt as usual and decided to go skew-iff -- just as things were getting veerrry interesting with this guy.... sooo frustrating.
Never mind, enough with the goss.
And onwards with the update on my progress.
I finally got rid of my bullet proof vest as instructed by my surgeon at the end of last year, what a relief THAT was, and since then have been using a 2nd stage compression garment, or if I'm going out, a pull-on spanx style bodysuit as it fits better under clothes.
The problem is that, with this newfound freedom and liberated feeling, my stomach has been looking pretty crummy.
It's really expanded - I can see in the mirror and just comparing my photos on here - even though my weight is totally stable and if anything, is on a downward trend.
So I know it's swelling, the famous much-loathed swelling, and at 6 weeks I can't expect any different, so I shall just have to be patient & put up with it. Apart from massaging my stomach, sides and back as often as possible, and wearing my compression garments, there is nothing I can do.
The lumpiness in my abs is pretty grotesque - again, classic symptom at around this point of healing after Vaser, and I am aware it could well continue all the way to month 6. Again, not much except massage can help with that so I can only sigh and try to be patient while I wait for it to get better.
Admittedly it's very depressing to look in the mirror to see how my waist has thickened, and my hips/flanks have become enormous, not to mention my thighs. Never had a prob with my legs - except when I'm in post-Vaser operation, since I remember this happened during my first Vaser op too.
Will post some photos I took 3 days ago on 12th Jan even though there has been no great progress, if anything I look a lot worse! Even if I look very sucky right now, I'm aware that it's only temporary.
Anyway this review is totally meant to be 'warts and all' so that anyone reading this can see what to expect or feel reassured that they're not the only ones out there who've ballooned out, and know that its not weight (fat) gain,but just bloat.
Regardless, i still need to post updates and pics as this review will be for my own benefit if I want to look back at my Vaser 'journey' and at the same time, hopefully will benefit anyone out there thinking of doing this op since by reading mine and other people's reviews they'll be able to make a much more informed decision about whether to go ahead.
Am due another check up with the Dr soon, I believe, and have not been to the clinic since just before xmas, and it's been a welcome break, to be honest, not to be traipsing over there all the time and able to focus on other stuff in life, other than my stomach, a lot more easily as a result.
However, as I always say, no rest for the wicked & infact they've been calling me to make an appointment with the nurse for a check up. Well at least they're keeping up their end of the bargain which was to keep a much closer eye on me this time around in order to avoid the disastrous results I had with the first Vaser op.
I'm now at the end of my 5th week post-op and at Day 49.
Considering I had a full 8 months of this just before going straight into this Revision operation + 49 freaking days of this second neverending healing saga I can barely believe how long this has gone on for - I mean, how many days is that altogether -- days, seconds, hours and minutes where my life just became nothing except all about 'the stomach' and the ups & downs and the crisis when I was disfigured, and crisis after the horrible final result of Op No. 1, and all the rest of it?
Ugggh, it just doesn't bear thinking about, how much time I have spent over this whole business.
It's just been going on too long. But I had no choice. There is no way I could have stayed with my stomach the way it was at the end of Operation No. 1. No way.
So here I am, exhausted but still struggling along for as long as I have to.
The worry, the pain, the stress; sometimes I wonder how I've still managed to remain sane .... well kind of, haha. Definitely have lost a few marbles along the way! That's for sure.
Hope to post more when I'm feeling better and a little stronger.
Basically for the past few weeks my stomach has been looking grotesque. And I don't mean just the usual 'Looks really bloated one day, then it's fine the next', but I mean really grotesque. First, I had that wretched pot belly shape starting to form just under my belly button again, like after Operation No. 1. I thought My Nightmare Is Starting All Over Again.
But then it got worse. After a week of that, suddenly my stomach started looking like it had all fallen down. Since then it's just stayed like that - a bunch of crevices, and folds, really repulsive - a total CAR CRASH.
Actually I'll tell you exactly what it looks like - the actress TARA REID'S STOMACH before she had it fixed (after her botched lipo operation)
Except of course I'm not a tiny size zero like her so it's not exactly identical.
I am usually not super well-informed on celebrity gossip, since most of it bores me, but the Tara Reid Stomach Lipo debacle was so widely publicised that even I was aware of it, and saw the pictures.
Well, I swear my stomach's in the same condition hers was in and it's just like my hopes have been shattered again.
I don't think it's a case of 'wait for it to settle down'
I can't imagine how the hell THIS mess of crevices and bumps is going to 'settle down'.
To add to my general depression, I left a detailed message on my surgeon's phone, sounding very distressed, that I was worried that his revision had not been a success and that my stomach was a complete mess --- well, it's been a week now, and he never got back to me.
It makes me sick to think of all the meetings we had and reassurances that this time around I would have proper round the clock care and attention, but look what's happened = as soon as I'm giving him negative news, he disappears, and doesn't even give a toss that I'm worried sick here.
I've been left looking like a freak again, just like the first time round.
I realise it's still early days for me (I'm 2 months post-op) infact coincidentally, this is the exact same day that I had the Revision (it was the 8th Dec), but to be honest, I don't feel it's going to fix itself with time. It's just too much of a mess, crevices everywhere, and folds, and just a total CAR CRASH of a stomach.
I'm distraught, have had to cancel a photo shoot that was going to pay good money, and after having fought off a chest infection and a UTI infection, I was JUST about ready to go back to work again, and now this happens, and I realise there's no way any one will give me the time of day looking like a goddamn freak. Pardon my French. But I just can't believe this has happened to me twice.
It was a real leap of faith for me to believe the Dr's and Managing Director's adamant chorus of 'A Revision will definitely fix this !!!' during our meeting about how to sort out the abysmal failure of Vaser Operation No. 1 (and my basically telling them I was going to sue them to hell and back).
But I took that chance, especially as they were very good about aftercare and scheduling plenty of appointments for me to attend after the operation.
I shall at some point post some pictures of how disgusting I look.
But I'll probably do it later this evening, or tomorrow, since writing this down is making it even more of a reality that my Nightmare has come back & I have a disgusting vile Frankenstein creation for a stomach -- yet again and I'm almost in tears again.
Don't know WHAT I'm going to do.
It's so sad, cos my stomach was looking fine - flat and nicely shaped, and now it's all gone wrong.
Now for perhaps the 100th time over the past 11 months I'm wishing I'd never heard of this operation or set foot in that clinic to have this wretched procedure.
It's now February and I'm still practically an invalid FGS, having been through 2 ops, two recoveries, and all the excruciating pain of the treatment for the seroma scarring which was caused by the surgeon's negligence.
Sorry have not answered any comments or queries on my review for a while, but I didn't come on RS for what seems like ages, in an effort to try not to think about my stomach, and hoping that in the meantime it would get better and I could come back on and post a nice update with some nice pics. Well it hasn't gotten better, and any pics I post right now will be anything but nice.
I'm very upset right now, have no one to even talk to about this. I'm just basically up sh*t creek without a paddle.
My Very First 'Before' Photo May 2013 --- Before It All Began !!!!!
This is what my stomach looked like before this whole wretched SAGA began.
Yes, it was chubby, fat, whatever, but at least it looked normal.
And that infamous POOCH in my lower abdomen, the bane of my life, which caused me so much grief and distress and which was the main reason for this op, apart from wanting my stomach to be flat for once in my life --- Now i look at it, that bulge doesn't look so enormous.
Maybe it never was. I just think the op has been the worse f*cked up decision I made in my life, and has affected so many aspects of my life, it would take me way too long to list them here.
I just want to put this out there -- for anyone thinking of doing this op.... Think about it long and hard, cos there's no going back.
I don't want to be pessimistic, some ppl have had GREAT results & I'm pleased for them. Some of us haven't quite been so lucky, and ended up looking worse.
This Is What My Stomach Looks Like Now
Straight after the operation I was 3 kgs heavier due to all the tumescent liquid & other stuff they pump into you; after I lost that weight and the swelling went down, I lost another 2 kilos & since then have remained stable.
Basically since removing the compression garment (I wore it for about 6 weeks - almost 2 months) my stomach and waist expanded and then the lumps and bumps began appearing and the ridges, and it just looks like it's a great big deflated great ugly balloon. Again. So much for this being 'fixable' according to my surgeon and the clinic manager.
Things Are Looking Better
Of course I didn't believe him initially, because after the first operation he kept saying things would improve and they never did.
Now I kind of realise I'm dealing with 2 different situations, and my advice is Don't do this under local
- especially if you haven't got a really huge amount of fat to remove, and if you are doing vaser on more than 2 areas.
Things are NOT Looking Better - This Op Has Basically Destroyed My Life
This huge swelling did not go down by very much at all. My stomach still looks like someone who's ingested a pile of rocks, and with such a thin layer of fat that you can see exactly what I've eaten. It is no longer the smooth stomach it was immediatley after the revision, when I first took the compression garment off, no, it turned into a digusting vile huge mass of lumps bumps and crevices, uneven skin, uneven layers of fat, just really repulsive to look at and even to touch, it feels revolting, it is hard as a rock.
i was not going to 'out' this surgeon who ruined me until I got the final results of his revision operation, but now the results are in, since it has been 10 months, I can safely say that both operations were a dismal failure and have left me a wreck; I have been placed under a Mental Health Team because I was suicidal and my only aim in life was to find the most foolproof way to kill myself. This was not just because of the operations, I had also some very tough things happening with my parents being taken very ill, and also lost my very best friend of 12 years - but the operation impacted on this depression most of all, as I was left destitute, with no one even able to give me a hand, and from earning a decent living, I was reduced to food stamps.
I could not even get for example, a desk job, or anything else, but that was not possible because ever since the revision I have felt constantly ill, mainly the stomach cramps and this feeling that I am pregnant - but with a whole pile of rocks in my abdomen. I don't ever look at myself in the mirror anymore - I make myself feel sick. I also often get this feeling that I have a fever and am burning all over - this can last for hours or an entire evening. Never had it before the operation. And the feeling of heaviness and weakness have virtually left me unable to leave my bed for over a year.
I suggest you choose your Dr very very carefully if you're considering this procedure. And, as I mentioned in my last entry, don't do it under local anaesthetic (this surgeon's claim about it being possible under local was a lie in my case, as I felt almost the entire operation whilst it was being done - literally felt like I was being stabbed for approx 6 hours.
If this Dr. would accept some responsibilty and at least give me my money back for having failed to deliver the results he'd promised (a flat stomach and small waist) I would not be half as aggrieved by the whole thing. But throughout my meeting after Operation No. 1 with him and the rest of the clinic's staff, he remained impassive and refused to even answer my question as to why on earth he had waited 8 days before taking a look at my seroma, - which resulted in it becoming so big I could barely lift myself off the bed. Really showed no respect for my feelings, and accepted no responsbility for my lack of income - none whatsoever. So now, having my final results, I feel it is time I can name him and I am doing this to ensure that whoever is considering any kind of procedure, with his doctor, to think twice about it, and read my review thoroughly so they can have an informed opinion before they put their lives in his hands - which is what I did, and lived to regret it ever since.
The first operation was in May 2013, so this torture and pain and depression has been going on for well over a year. It's disgusting that this surgeon will not even show the slightest compassion or accept any responsibilty in his procedures having come out so badly. He has basically washed his hands of it.
He is aware that I am suing him and I hope I win the case, as due to his attitude during all this pain I have been through, he fully deserves it.
His name is Dr Edwin Anthony and he works at both MediSpa in Kensington, and at The Private Clinic in Harley Street.
It was clear by month 5 that the revision had not been a success, but all he did was to keep telling me to be patient, that my stomach was still 'settling down'. Nonsense. In May/June my results were just as disgusting.
I have many internal & external problems due to this lipo, I'll list just a number of them:
Stomach full of lumps and bumps.
Rippling of skin in certain areas, very ugly
Massively protruding areas, especially after having eaten, regardless of how much I ate.
Severe pain whenever I eat, so I have had to subsist on a liquid diet for several months, as even the smallest morsel of food will cause my stomach internal pain, and later, I will pay for having eaten anything, as for hours later, it will feel like I have rocks trying to push themselves through the skin of my abdomen. It is a horrible, painful, and disgusting feeling I would nto wish on anyone. So I am either in suffering from hunger pangs, but unable to eat as the result is just pain, or having given into the hunger pangs, feel like something my internal organs are going to burst straight through my stomach.
It's now October, and my stomach has not changed at all, neither aesthetically, nor the internal problems affecting digestion, etc. Bowel movements have been problem (difficult and/or painful) even now, 10 months on since the revision operation and let's just say my sex life has become non existent as I am so ashamed at how disfigured and disgusting my stomach looks and how any man will find it repulsive to look at.
I have been in the process of suing this surgeon, but it takes time. He has ruined my life in many ways. I work in the adult industry. My job depended on my looks and having now had my stomach destroyed, I have lost all my income completely, and have not been able to work for year, save for the very rare occasions when the employer has been OK with me covering up my stomach area with a piece of clothing, etc. but that, as I say is rare and once a photographer or director knows you have a physical deformity they will not touch you with a barge pole.
I have lost all hope of ever having a relationship or even children, as no man would want to wake up every morning to something so repulsive, and why choose a deformed woman over one who has a body that looks normal.
The whole thing has been devastating, especially the loss of income - I have had periods where I did not even have enough money for toilet paper and I have lost all self esteem.
I will see if I can find the latest photos that I took of myself, to show you the disaster this man caused. He is not a proper surgeon. He is a cosmetic surgeon, not plastic. Big difference. A mistake I will regret for as long as I live.
I would not recommend this Doctor - my review speaks for itself. I had two Vaser Lipo operations and the first was a total failure, and I was offered a revision for free, but this also failed miserably. To say this Dr has ruined my life is an understatement, as he has left me disfigured and the results have impacted negatively on my career, and relationships and my mental health and left me with no self esteem left at all. Please note: the rating for 'Aftercare' relates to the doctor; ;the staff at Medispa were excellent and very professional and provided excellent after care. The Follow-up from the Doctor, is rated low, as again, it does not relate to the clinic but to the surgeon - I basically saw him a handful of times after my first operation, despite his knowing that I was having severe problems during my operation recovery (e.g. seroma, excessive abdominal swelling from day one due to him having left a heap of residual fat which then had to be removed during the Revision Operation). This man tries to lay on the charm very thick, and appears to be overwhelmingly confident, to the point where it looks absolutely false and actually gives the opposite impression, or that he is just incredibly arrogant and self centred). He is very vague in answering when cornered about anything negative and will often just smile instead of answering a difficult question (such as why my seroma was not examined or drained the same day it was diagnosed by the nurse, and why did it sometimes take him an entire week to call/email me back when I was evidently having severe problems). I would give this Dr a wide berth. He works at both MediSpa South Kensington branch (Kensington Church Street), and The Private Clinic at 98 Harley Street but I believe he also practises in other areas outside London, so I would just ask people to be on their guard if they come across him.