48 Year Old with Almost 8 Year Old Silicone Implants. 800cc - San Diego, CA

I have had problems since I've had the BA surgery....

I have had problems since I've had the BA surgery. I had decent size breasts when I went into the surgery not much sagging but I did nurse 2 babies for a couple of years each. This was my 40th bday present for myself and my husband to enjoy. My left breast was soft but my right breast was hard and developing scar tissue quickly. We tried Accolate for 90 days with no improvement. My PS replaced implant and removed scar tissue on the right breast 6 months after the initial surgery. I was not thin when I got my implants and steadily gained weight after I got them. I've had MRI's & mammograms over the years and as far as I know there aren't any ruptures in the implants. I have had weird flu like symptoms that come and go, tenderness and pain in both breasts and a couple of mastitis like infections with fever. I just resigned myself to the fact that I had made a bad choice. I didn't want to spend anymore money on my boobs. Fast forward to a few weeks ago. My left breast was tender and had a huge zit like thing towards the bottom of my breast. It was hot to the touch and started leaking puss like fluid and there was a small hole when I removed the bandaid I'd put over it. Freaked me out!!! My GP gave me antibiotics and set up a consultation with a surgeon. I have Kaiser insurance which is an HMO. The PS looked at my breast and said the left implant had an infection all around it and he could see the implant through the hole in my breast. He said the implant needs to come out and he will take out the other one too. Kaiser will cover this but no lift or replacement of implants which I'm totally cool with!! I don't care if I have pancakes for boobies when it's all said and done. I just want to feel better and be able to hug people without being embarrassed. I want to be able to sleep on my stomach again and get rid of all the inflammation going on in my body. I've loaded some pictures of what my pre op boobs look like and the hole in my left breast. My surgery is tomorrow :-) I put $5000 for my expected cost but my insurance is covering and I'll have just my copayment of $50.

Today is the Day to say goodbye to my implants.

I actually slept well last night and I'm ready to get this over with! I have to be at the surgery center at 10:30am and my surgery is at high noon :) I'm nervous about general anesthesia :/ I have a slight headache and WANT coffee badly!!

Happy to be on the other side of Surgery :)

Surgery Update:

Thank you all for the well wishes, prayers and positive thoughts. It really feels great to have so much love and support coming my way. I was a bit reluctant to share what was going at first but so happy I did.

Both implants and scar capsules were removed and were sent to pathology. I also had a bad infection on the left side with a large abscess that the surgeon had to cut out of my deep tissue and it had begun to break down my skin. My pectoral muscles had to be sewn back together because at some point in the past 8 years they detached. My right side had quite a bit of scar tissue removed. The surgery took 3 1/2 hours due to some unexpected additional work that needed to be done.

Last night was rough pain wise. I'm not a back sleeper so I dozed in and out through the night. Tuesday I'll get the dressings off and the drain taken out. I'll get a peek at the damage at that time before they put some new dressings on. Sutures on the outside will be removed most likely on Friday.

I provide the gory details in hope that some of you ladies out there will rethink putting foreign objects inside your body. We are beautifully made. My breasts fed both of my daughters and have served me well over the years. I'm very thankful to be on the other side and be my natural self again.

Update Day 2:

I was able to sleep 3-4 hour stretches last night. I'm up early this morning due to all the dozing I did on and off yesterday. My left side is still very sore but that's to be expected from the amount of infection I had there. I barely notice any pain on my right side. I did take a peek at the top of my breasts and they still look like breasts :) I would guess I'm now a a full B to small C cup. I have large nipples/areola which are covered by gauze (I did not have a lift so I'm not sure of the current state/location of my nipples). My BA scar is at the bottom of my areola and my explant scar is at the bottom of breast. Due to the size of my implants (800cc silicone), the infection in my left breast and hole in it and also having the capsules removed on both sides, the PS thought my nipples would look better if we didn't go through those scars again. I'm very realistic in my expectations and I'm not striving for perky breasts. I just want to start feeling better and be healthy. My right breast will most likely droop more than the left due to the breaking down of skin on the left. I've noticed two things since my surgery: 1. I've been peeing a lot and getting rid of water retention that I attributed always to peri-menopause. 2. My face is less puffy and my skin seems brighter. It's like the inflammation in my body is decreasing already. Hubby and I are working out a new menu for us that will be excluding inflammatory foods. He has already noticed a change in my overall well being. I love reading everyone's stories and I'm overwhelmed, in a good way, with the amount of caring and support provided here.

Update Day 3:

I slept so much better last night! I looked at my nipples yesterday and they are a bit sad looking but not inverted. My husband said he thinks I lucked out because they look great to him. Even if he was just trying to cheer me up (which he did) I'll take those encouraging words. My left breast is very tender and I still have fluid draining out. Tomorrow the drain comes out. Yay! Being forced to take it easy has given me so much time to think. This is what's currently running through my head....There is far more right with you than wrong with you. You need love the most when you feel you deserve it the least. You have to accept and make peace with today before you can reach and feel satisfied with what the future holds. The beauty of us lies in our vulnerability, our love, our complex emotions - our authentic imperfections.

Inspirational Visual

Update Day 4: drain is out & I saw my real breasts

Being completely honest, when I saw my breasts for the first time I cried. I know that getting the implants out was the best thing for me but I'm grieving for my pre BA breasts. The nurse said that my left breast will drop and fill out around the nipple. There was a large cyst that was abscessed and removed in that area. I also lost more breast tissue on the left side from the infection that was there before explant. I guess I need some time to adjust to my new look :-) thank you all for your encouragement and well wishes.
Dr Jordan D Sinow

5 out of 5 stars Overall rating
5 out of 5 stars Doctor's bedside manner
5 out of 5 stars Answered my questions
5 out of 5 stars Time spent with me
5 out of 5 stars Phone or email responsiveness
5 out of 5 stars Staff professionalism & courtesy
5 out of 5 stars Payment process
4 out of 5 stars Wait times
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Wow..your story had me mesmerized. Your self-esteem thoughts should be on a plague and hung on a wall to inspire us daily. You could sell them girl. Im going to write them down for MYSELF. what a traumatic experience you had with a hole in your breast. I bet that scared you to death. It sure would have scared me for sure. And having an infection like that was horrible. Having your capsules removed was a good thing for sure. I did not have mine removed for I just had my implants removed without any complications. I have to wait 2 months for the capsules to shrinkin my pic muscles to heal back together before I can exercise my chest area. I was hoping I would also lose weight right away due to inflammation but I have actually gained 3 pounds. It has to be inflammation water weight for I don't eat that much at all. But yeah that was the one thing I hoped for the most was to see my body shrink due to inflammation. I know I need to lose 10 to 15 pounds of fat that I have gained since my hysterectomy in 2010. I take a very low dose of estrogen to prevent hot flashes and prevent dry skin but I guess even a little bit causes weight gain. I'm going to consider the hormones that is compound and try to get progesteron back into my hormone therapy. They normally don't put progestron in hormones for someone that has had a total hysterectomy. progesterone helps you burn calories properly. so tell me please.. how are you feeling now? How is your breast doing? How much weight did you end up losing after your ex? I am pleased to see that you feel better after your breast explant. I hope we all here on this side completely heals from those toxic bags. have a great day. I hope to hear from you soon. Sincerely Karen
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Thank you, Karen :-) I'm doing much better now. I haven't had a migraine since my surgery and have lost 10 pounds (mostly fluid and the implants). I'm at the beginning stages of menopause but will not be taking any hormones since my mom got breast cancer from taking Premarin. She had a complete hysterectomy when she was 46 and loved taking hormones because they made her skin look great. She is 74 now and four years cancer free. I have heard some good things about bio identical hormones. As far as how my breasts look I don't think there has been much change there. My husband says they look fine so I guess that's something :)
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It will all work out for the good. Keep posting it helps to vent your frustrations and improvements.
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Keepingabreast....I find that Royal Maca Root capsules help me tremendously in this peri-menopause stage of my life. Check it out and see if it resonates with you.
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It is rally early still. Be patient and have faith in your body. You look marvelous natural and it can only get better!
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Awww thank you, Time to be natural. I'm back at work and everyday I feel a bit better. This morning I have a post op check up with the surgeon so I will most likely update with pics tonight or tomorrow. :-)
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I admire your positive outlook & strength!!
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Thank you, LiveNLearn :-) Being able to share with women who know what I'm going through is tremendously helpful.
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It's still very early, I think time will make a big difference, the most important thing for healing is a positive attitude and you have that!! I think the first days after surgery are a shock to many of us, and it's easy to go back to the anger and despair for what we've done to our bodies in the past. The only thing we can do is forgive ourselves, move forward with our beautiful and healthy new selves and be the best we can be, Sending you positive thoughts for a quick and happy healing!!
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Very well said Cocomom - I want to remember your quote: "The only thing we can do is forgive ourselves, move forward with our beautiful and healthy new selves and be the best we can be."
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Yes, I completely agree. I had a moment of despair for something I chose to do to my body. I'm feeling very good now and at peace with where I ended up. Cheers to new beginnings and our healthy new selves! Thank you both for being so supportive & positive :-)
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THANK YOU for being so brave in sharing your story and helping all of us here on RS.
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I'm really happy for you.. you are an inspiration... I'm glad I found your review and am able to follow up with you. Ditto with the other comments: U r looking good right now... U'll be surprised what a little healing time will do for the appearance of things... and yes, the attitude is a plus, and you got it going on, girl!
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Thank you, Ilovebreasts :-) today was a better day.
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Chin up honey! I think you look fantastic!! It's only day 4 and of all the reviews I've seen on here I have not seen anyone else with a literally a hole in their breast a terrible infection/cyst going on. You will continue to heal and the nurse is right it will fill in. Keep up with those positive thoughts... you are beautiful!
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Thank you Larlabear :-) I just had an emotional day and was sad to see where my bad choice had led to. I've acknowledged how I was feeling and forgave myself so I can continue healing. Having caring women such as yourself talk me through this moment is a gift. I hope I will be able to pay it forward to all of you.
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You know..ALL ps procedures have some type of negative outcomes. I kept that in mind for myself. Keep in mind also for yourself that your breast fed your babies and did the job GOD intended breast for. So you should be proud your implants didnt mess that up for you. You have some much to be thankful for. You could have lost the whole breast due to the infection but you didnt. You still can fill out a bra and nobody can tell your breast isnt any different than normal. And heck...ad far as a man and sex..he still has one perfectly normal breast to play with..lol..a man doesnt need two breast at a time..lol..its all he can do to handle one..right? Please dont be disapointed about your looks...your fine..w all have something about ourselves we dont like. We felt imperfect and got boobs so why feel bad if they are not perfect after explant? We are loving our imperfections NOW because we accept ourselves. If others dont accept our imperfections then they dont accept us and they need to keep walking. GOD made us all different for a purpose. Its not for us to know why but it is to help others somehow. You are DOING it now. Hopefully your experience will help at least one other person. If so then your experience worked...your story made my day for sure. Xxxx Karen
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OMG! You look AMAZING! I had to go back to your original pixs (pre explant just to remember since I've seen hundreds of boobs in the last few days) and you look so MUCH better. I understand from what I've read here on Real Self that we all get a bit of shock and there's a readjustment period but seriously, you look AMAZING after only 4 days. I think the left one will fill out and catch up to the other one. You have been through the worse - from now on just focus on your healing! Each and every day there will be improvements - be patient, be kind to yourself.
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Your words are a gift to me. I just had an emotional day and was sad to see where my bad choice had led to. I've acknowledged how I was feeling and forgave myself so I can continue healing. Having caring women such as yourself talk me through this moment is a gift. I hope I will be able to pay it forward to all of you. Thank you, Happy and Holistic :-)
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I love the last line on your most recent update: "The beauty of us lies in our vulnerability, our love, our complex emotions - our authentic imperfections." Beautifully said! Continue to take all the time necessary to nurture yourself. There are times when I feel like I want to lick my emotional wounds a bit and I think of my inner child - the little girl I was at 4 or 5, running around with a beautiful energy - I picture myself holding that little girl and loving her unconditionally. Thank you keepingabreast for letting us know how you are doing. I can't wait to be on the other side!
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Two of my favorite Ted talks http://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability
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Amen Happy
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So happy you are feeling better. I love the inspiration photos you are adding and your attitude... it makes all the difference in your progress. My explant is on the 21st and I'm just so ready to get it over with. The waiting is the worst.
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Thank you! I'm working on forgiving myself for what I put my body through so that I can heal and move forward. Sharing with my friends and family what I'm going through has been very liberating. Where there was shame & embarrassment there is now hope & healing. The waiting is the worst.... You will be so happy to have your own breasts again.
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Hi, welcome to the other side! I will be joining you soon on the 5th as well and I couldn't be more excited. Thank you for sharing your story. From the sounds of things you are reeping some of the benefits of your body healing itself from those bags. I will be thrilled to have them out. Its been a lesson learned for me. I am so happy for you. I too hope to see the benefits and feel them as well after my surgery. Would you mind including some of the known inflamatory foods to avoid? Thanks and I will be looking forward to your post op pics! Congrats again.
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