I'm a 38 yr old mother of three. Breastfed all 3...
I'm a 38 yr old mother of three. Breastfed all 3 kiddos for varying lengths. Prior to children I was always a small B. After having children I was excited I managed to maintain a C cup up until a few months ago. I lost 10lbs and apparently it all came from the boobs! Even at a C cup I thought of having a BA not necessarily to get much bigger but more to ensure that with age I didn't lose what I had. After going back down to a "deflated B" (as my PS so kindly put it) I decided it was time!
My surgery is in 2 days and I'm still so nervous. I have moments of getting excited but then I get overwhelmed with everything....the procedure, the recovery, the horrible talks of constipation! I know I will be so excited when it's all said and done though and it will be worth it!
I'm still very very unsure of my size. My PS is one that was highly recommended from other friends and is one of the top surgeons in my area. However, he doesn't do "measurements" and after speaking with his staff of nurses I've been told that the size is such a personal decision he doesn't give much input other than telling you if you're going "too big" for your size or "too small" for what you say you'd like to look like. This leaves the final decision of the size seem so much harder since everything I've read is all over the place as to what is right for each person.
I've tried on the sizers two different times at appointments and the last I tried I had settled on 475cc high profile saline under the muscle with a transax incision (it's what he specializes in and does the most of as far as incisions go). However, now I'm wondering if it's too big???!??!?!
I'm 5'4" 120lbs and as I said I'm a deflated B right now. I do want fullness in the upper part of the breast but I also don't want to look HUGE. It seems like the more photos I look at I just become more and more confused as to what I like! UGH!
My final decision doesn't have to be made until the day I go in for surgery on Thursday but I'm really stressing about the size. I've tried rice sizers and as I said the sizers in the office. I'm just nervous and get really wrapped up in the number....which I know I shouldn't.
I've picked up my prescriptions. I will be staying with my best friend for as long as I need to as I am divorced now and my ex is taking my kids on vacation for 11 days so this is why I scheduled my surgery now. I don't want the ex or my kiddos to know....though I suspect eventually they will notice! haha!
Made arrangements for my dogs, packed my recovery clothes, going to purchase a few last minute supplies tomorrow....snacks, water, colace, etc.
I can't believe it's finally happening!
Night Before BA! OMG I think I'm still in denial! Surgery is at 10am!
I could barely sleep last night. I just scoured Instagram for boobs. I feel like such a pervert! LOL I'm feeling more excited and less nervous....at least for now. Today I was instructed by my PS to begin taking the Bromelain, Arnica & the antibiotic in addition to the daily AM/PM supplements I was given two weeks ago at my pre-op. I feel like a junkie....a perverted junkie. So many meds!
I picked up two bralets from Target tonight which probably won't fit after the BA but I couldn't help it. I wanted something semi decent to attempt to take after photos in after I can take off the surgical bra. I also picked up a few last minute snacks, coco butter oil, ice packs (from the breastfeeding aisle that was a recommendation I saw on here!) They look perfect.
I've sent a list a people my bestie needs to contact for updates since I'm assuming I'll be completely out of it when I'm out of surgery tomorrow. It's not a long list since I'm not telling a lot of people.
My bestie will be taking care of me at her house for as long as I need to stay. However, she is having her BA on Monday (we wanted to do them together!) and her hubby will be home by then from work to help take care of her and assist me if I decide to stay longer. I'm not sure what my recovery will be so I have an open ended invite to stay with them until I feel well enough to manage. I'm off work for the summer and my kiddos are on vacation with my ex-husband for 12 days so I'm hoping I will be well enough when they return to be somewhat normal.
I'm a little nervous about not eating or drinking after midnight tonight since my surgery isn't until 10am. Also, I'm nervous about not peeing first thing in the AM since they need a urine sample before surgery and I don't want to not be able to go when I get there.
Still don't have a firm idea on size. Between 400cc-450cc more than likely. I want them to look good on my body (5'4" 120lbs) and somewhere between the fake and natural look. Big but not OMG YOU GOT A BOOB JOB big!
Hopefully I can sleep a little tonight. Super nervous about the anesthesia also as I've never been put under and have no idea how I'll react to it. I won't even read anything about it because I start to get too much anxiety about it. I hope I don't say anything stupid....though I'm sure I won't be the first. Also, hoping I don't throw up a lot afterwards. I am taking the Emend 3 hours prior to surgery so hoping that keeps the vomiting at bay.
Can't think of much else to update with. I took some before photos tonight. Going to try to upload those later as well. They are sad....so so sad. LOL
Today's the day!
3 Jul 2014
Day of treatment
I can't believe in just a few short hours I'll be back in the OR getting ready to have this done. I can't believe how fast it's all happened. A little over a month since first deciding to go forward and do it. It's just crazy.
I slept pretty well last night. I ate really late since I wouldn't be able to eat again for a while and really tried to relax as much as I could.
This morning I HAD to pee. I was going to try to wait until I got the the PS because they need a urine sample and I was worried about going again when I was there but I couldn't hold it!
I'm ok as far as not eating right now but wish I could drink something at least. I want COFFEE!
Took the Emend and am all set. Just need to finish packing a few last minute things to take to the bestie's house and I should be good to go.
WHOA! It's happening!!!!!!
3 Jul 2014
Day of treatment
Finally adding a couple before photos!
Couple more before photos taken day of BA
Wanted to post the other couple pics I took the morning of my BA (yesterday!) Sports bra from Target. Sized M and clearly you can see how flat it makes me look. Excited to try it on again with the new girls. :)
Day 1 Procedure & Recovery Part one
I can't believe it's over! I was pretty calm yesterday going in and leading up to the surgery.
Took the Emend at 7am, 3 hours prior to arrival.
As soon as we arrived at the office they took me right back. I didn't even have time to sit down and chat with my best friend which was good and bad. I left my purse and phone with her and off I went.
I think my PS was running a little behind, they never mentioned it but I feel like I was in my room for well over and hour before he came in to draw on me or see me.
My nurse, Stephanie, was amazing. So reassuring and friendly. It helped ease my nerves.
I was given a gown and socks and told to take everything off except my underwear. They had a warm blanket ready for me to cover up with and gave me some magazines to read (albeit, outdated) so I flipped thru them while I waited not reading anything and only looking at boobs. :)
When Dr. Young came in he drew on me and asked what size I'd finally settled on. I went for 425cc. He does not offer a lot of input. He said, "ok. That works" I asked or they would be ok and he said I could go anywhere between 375cc-500cc and he thought Id look great but I was the one who knew more what I was looking for.
I understand his approach but if I'm being honest I would've liked a little more guidance. But he does amazing work and I trust he would've spoke up had he thought I was choosing something radically inappropriate for my desired look and frame.
Once he left I waited a little longer and the anesthesiologist came in. Got a quick medical history, answered questions and said he'd see me in the OR.
My nurse returned, gave me an antibiotic thru my IV and something to "relax me" well, whatever that was, it relaxed me because I was out she even finished putting the rails up on my bed to wheel me to OR. Next thing I knew I was waking up in recovery.
Immediately I felt pain, not unbearable but definite pain. My eyesight was blurry and I could hear the nurses talking. I asked for pain meds and my nurse said she'd already given some thru the IV but I could have more when I showed her I could wake up and walk well enough.
Took me about 15 minutes before I could. I was rewarded immediately!
Getting tired and uncomfortable now so I'll update with Part 2 in a bit.
Day 2 recovery
Day 2 of recovery isn't much improved from day one
I can get up a little easier on my own and use my arms more. My right side is far more swollen and out of whack than the left for sure. Not sure why. My incisions are a little sore also (transax) and bruising is a lot worse than I thought. It feels good to put pressure on them but not sure if that's a good idea right now. Everything else seems ok. I took my first pics of the new girls. You can see the difference in the right and left.
The bruising bothers me. Was hoping I wouldn't bruise.
Day 2 Post Op photos
Adding first pics of the new girls! 425cc mentor high profile saline unders with Transax incision.
One more pic of bruising
Bruising under right arm and incision site
Frankenboob! Got it!
Woke up this morning scared about hematoma on right breast. Lots more bruising scared me. Called PS he didn't seem overly concerned but said come in Monday and he'll look.
Starting to get nerve pains. Noticed a lot of numb areas also. Left looks good.
Think I'm overly emotional because I'm feeling like I'm not so happy with the outcome yet. I'll have to wait and see with bras and different things. I know it's early yet.
Bloated and constipation is setting in. This is all sorts of fun! Lol I knew this going in so trying to stay positive!
If I could get the swelling to go down on the right I'd maybe get a chance to see what the final result was .
Took a shower today and stayed up more but still haven't slept longer than a couple hours at a time. Just praying this all comes together soon and I feel good about it!
Today is the 3rd full day of recovery. Still very groggy and medicated. Going to try to begin spreading out pain meds. Or take a lower dose. I'm tired and am easily fatigued.
Swelling is still pretty noticeable in the right. Bruising is awful looking. :( no fun.
Bloated, full of air And constipated. Good times!!!
My left side seems to be cooperating and I'm thrilled with how it looks. If I could get the other side to match all would be well.
My bestie goes In tomorrow for her BA.excited for her!!! Think she's a little nervous after seeing my recovery but she will be awesome!!!
Today my goal is to poop and space out pain meds. :) little goals!
Good on pain management
Have only taken one pain pill and on emus lie relaxer today around lunch. There's not a lot of pain now just tightness and "full" feeling in breasts. Incision sites and arms still sore to touch and if I over do it I know. Swelling on right breast continues. It goes down with I e then when I get up and move around it starts swelling and the implant starts moving higher again. The bruising scares me. It's almost around the entire boob now. Yuck! But there's no place that is painful of anything like that. My pS is going to look at it tomorrow.
I like the look of my left breast as it seems to have settled in nicely but I was hoping for a little more upper pole fullness with it. Although I haven't really got a chance to try on anything other than a sports bra yet.
Otherwise, recovery is going well I suppose. Still tired and out of it a bit.....and the constipation continues. Ugh! Took something for it earlier still waiting on results!
Went to the PS today about all the bruising and swelling on my right breast. He said I do have a hematoma but he's not convinced my body won't absorb it on its own. He's going to see me Thursday again and he will decide if we need to do surgery to drain it. I'm really disappointed. I know things like this happen and it could be worse but I just feel like another procedure puts me further behind on the recovery road. Prolongs my healing. My kids come back Sunday also so I won't have the luxury of recovering properly. It will all be fine I'm sure.
Otherwise, not much change frm yesterday. Getting anxious about the girls and when they will make their first debut!
Not happy today
I think the post op boobie blues are setting in. My right side has continued to give me problems. It's significantly larger than the left. I think it has gotten bigger thru out the day. Despite wrapping back up in the ace bandage. It's up to my collarbone and I've iced all day. The bruising under my arm has yellowed and faded a bit but the bruising underneath has spread and is now under both breasts and down my side. I'm extremely worried about it all.
I'm am still bloated and constipated and I just generally feel like crap.
I'm just not feeling very chipper about all of this right now. Ugh. I just wanna wake up and feel better. :(
Hematoma surgery scheduled for tomorrow. I saw my ps today because the swelling and bruising last night was worse than ever. He made me come right in. He looked and said that I will need surgery to drain the hematoma. He said the process is only about 20 minutes but I do have to go under again. I'll have a drain for about 5 days also. I'm disappointed but also relieved that it will be taken care of tomorrow and maybe my remaining recovery will go smoothly. I am pretty scared just because I'm afraid this will lead to other complications. Also I didn't want to delay my recovery because my kids will be hm soon from vacation with their dad and I wanted to be well past the hardest parts of recovery by then. I'm trying to stay positive though! Nothing to eat or drink again after midnight but my surgery is early at 645am so that is good!
Still recovering with my best friend who had her BA Monday. She's doing great. We are laughing at ourselves and how our bed looks with medications, pillows, bendy straws all over the place. It's been fun to recover with her as her hubby takes care if us. He's been great! Def makes it easier.
Just wanted to share my update.
On the mend
Late update but I did not feel well enough yesterday to update. My surgery to drain the hematoma on my right breast was yesterday morning bright and early at 645am. I was so ready to have the pain from that breast gone, the swelling and the tenderness to finally subside. However, I was so nervous. I think I was just more afraid of additional complications after that surgery and kept thinking what if I have to keep coming back for more surgeries....was this the right thing to do? Luckily, I didn't have to wait long for surgery to begin so I didn't have long to dwell on my decision to get my plants in the first place.
This process was much harder than my initial surgery. My nurse tried and failed 3x to give me my IV. That paired with my overall anxiousness had me on am emotional roller coaster. The anestesiologist came in and gave me something to help with the nauseous that the anesthia would give me. However, that ended up making me vomit. It had a horrible side effect and it was terrible. So it was a rough start but all did go well once I was out! Haha
Waking up wasn't as hard as the first time around but the pain was more an I had anticipated.
I have a drain and the pain at the incision site was more than I had thought it would be. It's gotten better today but I am constantly checking to make sure that it's still in.
Hopefully I'll get the drain out on Monday. Overall today feeling much better and feel like I'm finally on the upside to this!
Day 10 post op
I don't know how to refer to my boobie birthday anymore because I'm 10 days post op from original surgery but only 4 days post op from hematoma removal surgery and I still haven't had my official post op visit, still have my stitches in my incision site, can't start massaging (originally was to be able to start at 1 week post op) and still have this drain, so I feel like I restarted my recovery after I had the hematoma surgery! Lol
At any rate, I don't know why I'm awake at 6 am. Woke up at 430, morning boob had set in so I got up to move a little bit so it would go away and now I'm wide awake!
I hadn't removed my bandage from over my bra since the hematoma surgery on Thursday. The bandage was holding my drain tube in place and i really was afraid to take it off because I want to see as little of that damn drain as possible, plus, after the surgery Thursday I was in so much pain again it felt better to leave the bandage on. Anyway, I finally took it off this morning. I wanted to see if the lack of pressure did anything to the amount of fluids I get in the drain today. I'm really hoping to get the drain out when I go in tomorrow to see PS. Fingers crossed!
When I took the bandage off and looked under my surgical bra I was relieved to see a lot of my bruising has faded. So happy about that. It got really bad. I didn't post the worse photos up here because they were awful.
I was also so happy to see my right side is completely the same as my left now which is what pS had said would happen after they did the hematoma surgery on the right side.
They also have dropped and the feel soft. I can feel and see the implant at the top but I don't mind that look. The right doesn't look like frankenboob anymore either!
They are still bruised underneath but as I said it's fading. And they are also still tender to touch in some spots.
I also think some of my numb areas are getting feeling back. It seems like my nipples are regaining some feeling too (thank God) so I'm hopefully that I'll regain most of my feeling again.
I am so ready to have this drain removed. I feel like I will be back to a semi normal state once that happens!
Still get really tired easily. But rest to get out and about again for small amounts of time.
And I want to shower! I've take 2 showed in 10 days and I haven't taken once since Thursday because of the drain. They said I could but I can't stand the idea of trying to tie this tubing up to do it. I might get desperate enough to do it though.
I want to get my stitches out also do I can begin treating the scars! From what I can tell they won't be too bad.
I will try to post pics later. I just returned home from staying over a week with my best friend who also had a BA 4 days after me do we recovered together for several days while her hubby took the best care of us. It was awesome to do it together!
FINALLY! The Drain is GONE!
So this morning I had my post op visit for the hematoma removal surgery that I had last Thursday. And I GOT MY DRAIN OUT! I GOT MY DRAIN OUT! I had no idea how ready I was for that sucker to be gone until last night when it started bothering me and I realized how little I had been able to do with it in.
So I went this morning and they said I met the criteria to get it out and out it came! OMG seriously, I had NO idea how far down that thing was. Since they went through my incision (armpit) it was through my arm down the right side of my right breast and all the way underneath it and she had to pull that sucker out and I felt it all the way! Seriously, so disgusting! BUT SO WORTH IT!
It's amazing how much better my righty looks now. Like it's caught up to lefty and I'm so happy with how they are looking right now. My bruising is still pretty yuck but it's definitely healed alot. i never posted the worse bruising photos up here because they were bad but it's looking really good now.
Also got my stitches out and cleared to start massaging on the left side. I have to wait for the right until it's officially one week post op from the 2nd surgery. So i'll start that Friday or SAturday she said.
More feeling is coming back. i got to shower and shave today also....ahh, so nice! Also down to only taking my pain meds and muscle relaxer to once at day at night before going to sleep.
Didn't have "morning boob" as much last night either but I also didn't sleep well at all so I was up more and moving more. That really is so uncomfortable.
Now I just have to really watch my right side and baby it a bit so we don't run into another hematoma. I go back in 2 weeks to double check it all again. Got released to wear normal bras as long as no padding or underwire (which leaves me with sports bras right now because I don't own a bra with no padding....I mean really...hello I just had a boob job do they think I own regular bras???)
I also drove today. Kinda difficult because my right arm is sore where they took the drain out but it felt good to be able to be a little more functioning.
I think that's all I have to update for now. I'm so thankful for all of you who offered encouragement through my little recovery set back!
I wasn't going to post any more pics but I tried on one of my bikini tops tonight and i'm not going to be able to resist. Cause, the girls look good! I'll post in a bit.
Day 11 post op / day 4 post op
Here's a pic from today. I'm 11 days post op from original surgery and 4 days post op from hematoma surgery on right breast.
Day 13 post op
Well i woke up this morning with very little morning boob. However, I haven't been sleeping great still at night so when I wake up in the middle of the night I try to get up at least once to help alleviate the onset of the morning boob. It seems to have helped a little.
Right side is still looking good. I've been watching it closely to make sure it is doing ok without the drain. Seemed this morning it was slightly larger than the left side when I first woke up but as I moved on throughout the day it seemed to settle down to the same size as the left.
My drain hole looks pretty decent today too. It appears to be closed up but it's really hard for me to tell and I don't have anyone else to look at it and tell me.
Another full day without pain meds and I think I'm going to try to go tonight w/out them before I go to bed because they really don't seem to have much affect on me anymore.
My bruising from the hematoma seems to still be gradually fading but it's hard to see much progress from day to day. It's def going to be a while before it's all gone. I hate how it looks but I'm relieved that ordeal is over.
Not much else to report.
I can't believe it!
I can't believe it's already been two weeks tomorrow since my initial surgery! I am feeling really good and I am sitting here thinking about how nervous I was two weeks ago! The first several days are such a blur that I actually feel like I lost days and it's shocking it's already been two weeks.
My left side seems a little tight today. Nothing major. And my right side (hematoma side) will be 1 week post op tomorrow and I am shocked at how much the bruising has faded in just 6 days. It was so bad prior to going in. I never posted the worse photos because they were BAD. Even the fading in the last couple days is incredible.
We are heading to the beach tomorrow for a quick overnight stay but unfortunately I won't be able to get into the water. I shall enjoy it from afar!
I'm slept a little on my left side last night. Holding a pillow onto my chest seems to help a ton (tip from my bestie) but it's like half on my back half on my side. Right side still a little too tender to lay on but getting off my back at least a little feels good.
Totally confused on massaging. My PS only gave me one technique to use and I'm clueless as to if I'm doing it right. And I've heard some people say they massaged too much and they were unhappy with how low they dropped. No idea.
Think I got a little boob greed today too....for the first time. Think I'm just getting use to them though. Because they still seem gigantic to me. haha
My incisions look amazing. I can barely see the right one and the left is looking great also. I did not expect them to look so good so quickly. Must say I am relieved since I went transax.
Thanks for all the kind words and comments! Always make me smile!
So I think I over did it. :( I was feeling so darn good after the drain can out from the hematoma surgery on Monday. It was hard for me to remember I was really not even a week post op on that side.
I had been given the clearance from my Ps to treat the right side the same as the left (as far as massaging and everything when I was officially one week post op on that side) that milestone was on Thursday. So I agreed to take my kids with another family to the coast which is a 2.5 he drive for us. It was only one overnight and one day at the beach. I didn't swim at all and the bikini too I wore was like a bandeau with no padding or wire which I was cleared to wear. I didn't lift any luggage and was careful with my arms still. But still felt pretty good until I woke up yesterday and the girls were achy. I forgot to take extra pillows to the hotel to help prop me up and slept awful and when I woke up I was on my left side. After getting home last night I showered and got into bed and was just exhausted but the girls were feeling better. Then I went to lay down and a big pillow hugged to my chest and was going to lay 1/2 on my left side and 1/2 on my back like I had been prior to leaving for the little beach trip. When I went to roll over my left breast tightened up and it felt take the implant popped up really high. I immediately rolled back to my back but it was sore and tender all night. Now this morning it's still tender and it keeps feeling like it's getting tight and firm and if have the overall feeling of being very aware of it again where I was just a few days ago feeling so well that I wasnt aware of them like they were a normal part of my body. I'm afraid I overdid it or popped the implant out of place or somehow messed something g up. It doesn't seem as soft as it has been. Could I have done something really bad? I know I'm probably hyper aware of them because of the set back with the hematoma on the right side but I'm worried. It just doesn't feel like it has been feeling. :(
19/12 days post op
I haven't updated in a few days. Feeling better since taking it WAY easy for the weekend after my little ambitious beach trip last week. Still feel like that set me back a few days but it did make me more aware that indeed this little adventure requires a little more caution while healing. Lol
My biggest obstacle at this point us still the limitations of using my arms due to my incisions (Transax) total pain and it's getting old to not be able to raise my arms better high. Otherwise I still wake up with morning boob but it's not nearly as uncomfortable as it was.
Seems I'm about 50/50 on my bikini/bras that I can wear from before BA. Obvs that may change as time goes on and more dropping or fluffing occurs. Just out of mad curiosity I measured myself yesterday. Accordingly to my measurements I'm varying between a 32d or 32dd. So I'm thinking for fun I'll hit VS tomorrow just to see what they measure me at. Again, I know it'll change but my curiosity is killing me. Won't dare buy anything though. I will say I was quite happy with my too soon measurements though. From a b cup to a d/dd preop....I'll take it.
My bf came over last night and it's the first time he's seen them im real life in over a week and he was quite happy with their changes and how good they looked. He had a bit of a hard time not staring at them. Haha
I thought I'd gotten most of my feeling back but I noticed today that there are still some numb areas underneath. How long can I expect numbness and when should I be worried that it might not fully return?
Also, what are thoughts on massaging? I've heard from several people they felt like they massaged too much and then they dropped too much. I'm really afraid of that happening. I actually really like where they are now. I don't want them to really drop much lower. It scares me! Haha!
My drain hole has healed great and my incisions look amazing.
I'm very happy right now with them because I feel like I can still hide them when wearing a regular tshirt but they look great in my tanks, bikinis and sports bras. It's so nice.
Also what is the consensus on dripping and fluffing and how it affects size? Do they really get bigger when the drop/fluff? How does that work?
I go back for another post op on the 29th. This will be because I had the 2nd surgery for the hematoma and it will be the 2 week post op for it. Everything seems to be on the up and up there also.
Posting a couple new pics also. :)
A few more pictures. I can hardly believe the difference in my right side from before the hematoma removal surgery which I'm only 12 days post op from. 19 days post op from original surgery. Couldn't be happier!
The size obsession continues!
So I thought I'd stop worrying about size once I PICKED a size pre op and went with it. Nope now I'm worried about what size they will END up! Seriously, I've obsessed about it all day. I guess because I'm so happy with how they are looking right now. Where they are sitting and the shape and size and I know they are going to change and i'm worried I will hate them when they start to drop and fluff and whatever else they might do since they clearly have a mind of their own and don't care what I want! LOL
As I mentioned in my last update I had measured myself and was sitting at a 32d and while I know they are going to change I had to see how accurate I was and really how big they were now as opposed to pre op so I went to VS today and go measured there. Sure enough she measured me right at a 32d or said I could go up to 34dd. I'm actually really really pleased with this size and now I'm just obsessed and worried about how much they will change and if I will lose a size or gain a size or what shape they will be or how low they will go or this or that or ARGH! I thought I'd be done obsessing about boobs!
Also, I have found THE BEST method to snapping me out of the "oh, I'm so sick of my arms hurting. Oh I'm so sick of this morning boob. Oh I'm so sick of sleeping on my back." I seriously get up and flash myself in my mirror. Totally worth it!
Visited my PS today
I'll be 4 weeks post op on Thursday from surgery and 3 weeks post op on the 2nd surgery to remove the hematoma. They took my drain out 2 weeks ago yesterday from the hematoma surgery so today I had to go in for a 2 week follow up for that. And I got fantastic news which was that I am released for all activities (except certain upper body exercises like chest presses etc...which totally doesn't affect me because I just run) He said I looked great, that my hematoma side had responded fabulously and that I could stop massaging (which honestly I never was because I was happy with how they were dropping on their own). Got released for normal bras as well. Just said to keep wearing sports bra at night and that there would still be tender spots and I'd still have uncomfortable moments but they should get less and less. Feel like I made it over a hump. Next appt is 2 months from now. Yay!