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Hello Everyone! I stumbled across Realself when...

Hello Everyone! I stumbled across Realself when researching the gastric sleeve and discovered that it is an awesome place to connect with people who have similar life experiences and goals.
A little about me-I'm a 42 year old mom, 5'1", and 220 lbs. I've been obese most of my entire life. I remember being on a diet most of my childhood and constantly being made fun of in school. My entire family, for the most part, is or has been morbidly obese, so I grew up on a yo-yo cycle of overeating and dieting.
I have thought of doing the lap-band procedure in the past but have had several friends who have tried it and all of them failed. So, I decided that I would probably not be successful, as well. However, my sister just had the gastric sleeve done in December of 2014, and she has had amazing success. I'm so proud of her. After doing much research, I have decided to have the procedure. It seems to be much more reliable than the band.
Due to insurance and needing several weeks to recuperate, I will not be getting my sleeve until June. I have already gone to my initial consult but will not have my first visit with the doc until January 5th. I can't wait! I have to have 4 months of doc visits, once a month, 2 psych consults, and one nutritionist visit. Here lately, I've been down in the dumps about my weight, mainly because I feel like there is no point trying to get it off because the past has shown me that I'm just going to regain it all back. I've done every diet-HCG, Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Slim 4 Life, and more...I've been successful on all of them, initially. I even lost 95 lbs once, only to regain it. I met my husband after I lost that weight, so when I met his family, I was thin and beautiful. It's so embarrassing that I have gained it all back and then some in the 13 years we've been married. I almost wish I had never lost the weight because they remember what I looked like when I was thin. So embarrassing!
But, my spirits have lifted since I've made the decision to have this surgery. I feel like I can now go ahead and begin loosing weight right now to prepare myself for my surgery in June. I know that there will not be opportunity for me to regain any weight I loose between now and then. I can loose it stress free and not be burdened with the thought of regaining. I'm ready for a new me! I don't have any pics just yet. I will post some when I get a chance.