- updated 1 year ago
I hope my title doesn't offend anyone but that...
- 29 Jul 2012
I hope my title doesn't offend anyone but that expression was on my mind. While on vacation recently, I was referred to by strangers as 'tig o bitties' because my name unfortunately slipped their mind (surprise!)
I've always been known as the girl with big boobs. Like so many others here I was ridiculed by friends and teammates in jr. high for being flat chested. Then one summer while playing softball, I could have sworn I swallowed softballs! I wore a sports bra nearly everyday so it was difficult to know what size bra I wore but before summer was over I was wearing two sports bras trying to tame the twins! Naturally, I wasn't as big then as I am now but my boobs have always been too big for my body. By the time I reached prom I couldn't wear those cute strapless dresses because stapless bras couldn't support my chest. I had a woman sized chest as a teenager and I was a very good girl that got very bad (unwanted) attention. I went through an eating disorder phase because my big boobs made me look big in my clothes.
I met a guy, he didn't mind the boob size. He knew (and as my husband, still knows) I have always wanted a breast reduction. I discussed a BR with my Dr. who told me I may not be able to breastfeed when I have children. That has always been important to me so I decided to grin and bear it until I had children. For many years now I've had to endure the all too common comments:
"What size are you?"
"Have you always been that big?"
"Have you ever considered a BR?" (Duhhhh!!!)
"What does that feel like, you know, to have such big boobs?"
"Can I have some of your boobs?"
etc, etc, etc.
My male OBGYN, during a breast exam, asked me the obvious question, "Have you ever considered a BR? I've seen several women who have had them and they were not nearly as....(awkward pause)....blessed as you are." I explained to him like so many others my reason for waiting. I was thinking to myself at the time, "can we please wait to discuss my boobs when you're not fondling them?"
I've been teased a lot about my boobs but I have a good sense of humor, as does my hubby. I don't take the jokes personal but sometimes they embarrass me.
After college, marriage, and two children I am ready to get the ball rolling! I met with two PS's recommended to me by my OBGYN. I chose my favorite and waited to hear from my insurance company. I whole heartedly expected to be denied because most people have told me they were denied at least once before they were approved. I got back from vacation, checked the mail, and there was an envelope from my insurance co. It felt like scratching a lottery ticket as I opened it. My husband was with me and I said out loud "Oh sweet Jesus!" He reacted as if something was wrong so I read it aloud and he said so that means you're covered...(insert smile) because my hubby is a tight wad! He feared having to pay for the entire BR. I immediately called the PS office and the nice lady set me up with a pre-op appt. and scheduled the BR for August 29th. The timing is not ideal but I can't wait any longer. I am self-employed so no paid time off and I won't go into the specifics of my profession but 2 weeks off makes me panic. I don't know how I can pull that off. So I am hoping I can return to work in 7 short days. (fingers crossed!)
I've been showing my hubby the before and after pictures (sorry ladies, I hope you don't mind) to prepare him for helping me after the BR. He is trying to convince me to take pictures and post them but I think he just wants to play photographer (he's a perv...LOL!) I don't know, if I can get passed the idea of having my girls on the internet for all to see! Thanks for reading my story. Even if nobody reads it, writing this was therapeutic!!!
I forgot to share the details. I am a mother of 2...
- 30 Jul 2012
Hello! 2 more nights before my BR. I think I have...
- 27 Aug 2012
I guess I could say I am having a little bit of identity crisis again! I trust my ps and I'm confident he will do a great job but I know people aren't perfect and if something bad could happen, it would probably happen to me...like my nips die or something! Kind of like flying, you know thousands of flights take off and land safely everyday but the day you fly it suddenly seems scary! I also know this BR will Make me look fatter rather than skinnier. My big boobs hide my gut and without the camoflouge my gut will take center stage!
I feel a " nesting " urge but it has to wait until tomorrow because my two little one's can undo all of my hard work in record time. A weird thought passed through my mind just now...should I wear a bra to surgery? Knowing I will have to take it off and obviously won't need it after surgery! Nah, I better wear one, I'd hate for one to jump up and knock me out cold on the way over :)
I'll try to post before pics soon! If you've read my posts, you'll know posting my boobs on the Internet feels A little awkward.
Can't post pics from iPad??? Only gives me an...
- 27 Aug 2012
Is it worth it?? Oh hell yeah :) Before surgery my...
- 30 Aug 2012
My support team (mom, aunt, and hubby) did a great job too. I never had to lift a finger. They mad sure I took medications right on time, aunt cooked dinner for my family, and husband made sure I was up every 2 hours taking a 10 min walk. He would walk with me and hold my arm...cutest thing ever! If you knew my husband he is rough and tough kind of guy, so seeing him baby me like that was cute. He is more concerned about clots and infection than I am, I think he is afraid I might DIE or something and he's be left to take of house...LOL! He told me later that night, " this is a lot of work for one guy to handle." I laughed bc he only has to do 1/2 of the work I usually handle. He is pretty funny.
I haven't been able to peek at my new boobs but I have a post op appt today and I will get to see them. They don't hurt, just the stinging and burning pings sometimes. I'm so excited about my new boobs, when I look in the mirror, I think the compression bra is sexy. LOL. Know matter what I see at post op today, It cannot possibly spoil my happiness!
My children have also been very patient with me, considering they are age 3 and 1. My 3 year old says, "mommy what happened to you boobies? DId the dr. cut them, did you get band-aid?" "Does it hurt? AWWW I sorry, you want me kiss it make it feel better?" He then says. "What happen to sissy's milk? Where did it go?" He knows too much for his age sometimes, but his comments and concerns were really funny! My 3 year old also brought me flowers and a balloon he picked out while with our aunt today! My kids are awesome. My one year old wants me to hold her so instead my family laid her in bed beside holding my arm and that was enough to satisfy her! I have caught her looking at my chest then looking at me with a slightly confused look on her face. I think she is aware of the difference.
I have also had several compliments on how thin I look now. I do have a belly that sticks out passed my boobs now but I'll target that when I'm healed. My PS already knows I'm coming back in a year to have a TT. He told me he usually does a TT and BR in pairs. Once someone does on procedure, they are likely to come back and get the other. He also told me that as I lost weight my boobs may begin sagging, nothing like before, but It will be a notable difference. HE said that a lot of times women that this has happened to will come back for implants. I was like "No way!!" why would I ever want to make my boobs big again! I'll just wear a push up bra. well my meds are kicking in and I'm passing out at the keyboard. Talk to you later!
Sorry about all of the typos in my previous post....
- 30 Aug 2012
Post op appt was today. It was the first peek I...
- 30 Aug 2012
I typed a really long post but for some reason it...
- 31 Aug 2012
Day 4 Post-op New pics Well I tried to go without...
- 1 Sep 2012
Well I tried to go without prescription pain medication today! Huge failure. I didn't last an hour before I got scared at how different my body felt. I was afraid the pain would escalate and I would have trouble treating the pain. But I really hate how the percocet makes me feel. I am drowsy all day, I lose track of time, I haven't had a BM (despite treatment), and it makes me super mellow. My mom makes me feel better by reminding me the PS took 6lbs and recovery isn't going to be quick! It also seems like the "pain" i do have is usually on my right side. Then I remembered that I'm right handed, so what little I have been doing is always with my right hand (drinking, washing, writing, eating)
Definitely have a love hate relationship with the compression bra! I like to let the girls breathe and my mom will lightly rub around the sutures to relieve some of the itching. After awhile my boobies are tired of supporting themselves and I cant wait to put the bra back on. Then I have to squeeze the girls together to get the bra around them (not very fun). My mom has handwashed the bra every night and I lay around to let them get fresh air.
Swelling is still pretty significant on the side of my boobs. It even feels different to touch, like it is semi numb. The area around my nipples/sponge is darkening. My mom says its nothing to worry over, so I don't. It's not red like inflammation or blue like bruising.
I like to shower, it feels really good. I do not like all the work after showering. Drying steri strips, patting sponges dry, etc. Plus, I feel like every shower I take increases my chance of infection. How often did you shower? I've been showering every night but I think that may be a little too much. My meds are kicking in again and I am literally falling asleep at the keyboard! I hate this!!!
Tonight has been rough, to say the least. I dream...
- 4 Sep 2012
Anyway, when I turned on my side it literally felt like I ripped open my sutures. I got up as quickly as possible and went straight to the mirror. Took of my pads and thank the good Lord everything was fine. I have been back and forth from the recliner to the bed all night trying to get comfortable enough to sleep. I finally gave up after rolling to my side (causing ridiculous pain) and took a pain pill. This should numb things up well enough I can rest comfortably in the not so comfortable back sleeping position!
I am still very impressed with my PS. I haven't had to call his office one time for any concerns. My boobs leak very little if any at all throughout the day. Bruising- I haven't really noticed any but my hubs says it looks a little bruised around my incisions under the boob. However, I have not had the pleasure of seeing my nips. I have sponges on them. I pray I have not spoken too soon. I had a FNG and by reading reviews, FNG usually cause some glitch (big and small) in the healing process. My boobs look so pretty now, I hope exposing my nipples won't ruin the look! It is hard to go out in public with these sponges though. They are difficult to hide in hot weather shirts. Even tshirts won't cover the budding sponges. They make me look like I have really large nipples that are always hard! Kind of funny...
Staples should come out tomorrow (insert sigh of relief). My hubby calls me zipper tits, he's crude, but I laughed anyway. he counted my staples and I have 34 on each breast!! My husband has had staple removed before on his ankle (maybe 10 or 12) and the removal was a painful experience for him. Mind you, he is a big baby when it comes to being injured and sick but I'm worried these babies are going to hurt when he takes them out. I'm saving two pain pill for that special occasion!
What else can I say....I did without pain meds the night before (but probably still had some left in my system) and all day yesterday. I was able to get up and do more without that drowsy feeling weighing me down. I have helped around the house, fixed my own snacks, I've been to town (I live in the middle of nowhere), helped bathe the kids, and put them to bed! I'm drifting off now (thank you percocet) so ta ta for now! O I am adding pics!
One week post-op today!! Went to PS to have...
- 5 Sep 2012
PS and nurse both said my incisions looked really good and healthy. Nurse said they were the best she has seen since she started 5 years ago! She said we did such a good job taking care of them and she was really impressed. (woot woot!) When the PS came in the nurse had just removed the sponges, but when he came in he sort of chuckled. I laughed and asked if he was laughing at my freakish nipples. The stitches were still in and they looked like long hairs on my nips. He then asked me if I liked the long hairs and if I wanted to keep them (funny guy this PS!) I said "why not, I might make some money on the side at a freak show!" He said everything was super and said I could resume light activity, nothing repetitious, start driving (though I already had). Wants to see me again in a week. He left and nurse continued removing stuff. Removing the staples and stitches cause light bleeding. SO she pt gauze on my nips and instructed me to wet them really well before taking them off, so that I don't peel off any scab, skin, etc, from the dried blood. This is why my nip pic still has gauze on them. She said I can shower forward facing in two days, try side sleeping in 2 days, and wants me to continue "nursing" my wounds for 2 more days.
I feel so much better without all of the tugging and pinching cause by staples. Really they sort of feel like normal boobs now! I also wanted to mention (in case you're reading this before your BR) The nurses suggested using panty liners on my incisions after surgery or gauze. I did NOT like either of those but I LOVED the surgical gauze pads I went home wearing. So I went to Wal mart and bought another box. They were like $6 for a dozen. They are thicker, wider, and longer. I really liked their thickness because the compression bra puts a lot of pressure on/around your incisions. The surgical pad gave me cushion from the band and irritated the incision less. SO you might want to try those. I changed my dressings twice a day, when I woke up and before I went to bed.
My back has also been tense. Partially because I'm not a back sleeper and because I haven't been able to stretch or flex those muscles with limited arm movement. So, they advised me to start doing shoulder rolls, neck rolls, and flexing my chest.
I'm posting pics from today! Let me know what you think...Hope everyone is doing well!
Just adding pics!
- 5 Sep 2012
Day 8 post-op and Oklahoma is freakishly hot and...
- 6 Sep 2012
2 1/2 weeks post op. 3 weeks this Wednesday! My 2...
- 14 Sep 2012
I went back to work on day 7 post op and I will have good and bad days. By that I mean sometimes my boobs feel sore sometimes not. Today, I made a big mistake, went to a meeting....left important paper on my desk...hurried back to my office (causing more bounce than usual)...boobs hurt like hell all afternoon and evening...still hurt. It doesn't help that my children want big hugs and my youngest roots around on my chest when she gets sleepy! O the pain sometimes makes me want to jump! My boobs have been hypersensitive, like really bad! I can take a drink of something cold and feel like I'm going to poke an eye out but when I look down, there's nothing there! Haha, my nips are still pretty flat. Seatbelts will also cause the "o no I'm nipping" reaction...it weird!
I'm still wearing compression bra. I'm a rule follower and they said nothing except compression for a few more weeks! I haven't even been tempted to try on a cute underwire yet. I will make it a big day when I can finally wear one. I bought a front close sports bra to wear when I launder the compression bra. Bought a 36 C, couldn't wear it initially, due to swelling, and it fits a little snug now. I still like it because it takes away some of the bounce that hurts, especially when I'm sore...like today!
Hope everyone is doing equally well! I can't wait for my shopping trip!
Super great doctor, not a single complaint thus far! I chose him based on numerous referrals from friends and doctors.