Hi everyone! I have been interested in getting a...
Hi everyone! I have been interested in getting a breast augmentation for many years...since I was old enough to wear a bra (even though I couldn't fill it out). I have done a ton of research since I decided now is a good time for me to get it done. I have had 3 pregnancies and my boobs do not have the volume they used to. My goals are to get to a full C/small D while still looking natural. I currently am 5'8' and 162lbs. My left breast is also smaller then my right so I am hoping to get that fixed as well.
So, today was my consultation with Dr. Gutowski. I was nervous the drive there and in the office while waiting. Once I was through with the small amount of paperwork they took me back to meet Dr. Gutowski. First impression was great! He was very informative and kind. He took his time (even though it as a free consult) and answered any questions I may have had. I actually brought a paper with a bunch of questions but did not once have to pull it out. I brought some pictures from his gallery that were similar to me now and what I would like to be. I also brought a few pictures of a few things I did not really like and hope not to receive at the end of all this. We were able to feel/see the differents in implants and talk about each shape and texture.
After he explained everything and answered all mine and my husbands questions he took a few measurements. He was able to explain my left breast being smaller then the right. He called it a "tubal breast" I believe. My left breast does not fill out on the bottom like my right one does and my skin is tighter as well. He explained that he could fix that by making some extra cuts while inside to help the skin stretch but it will make for a longer surgery...I am ok with that though.. It does bring the cost up a bit for more anesthesia and stuff. After his exam and measurements we went to another room for pre op pictures and we did the 3D virtual thing...that was pretty neat to see my body with boobs! lol He showed me what sizes would be appropriate with my measurements and still give a natural look. We also put one size into one breast and another size into the other breast to see a more symmetrical look.
After all of that we went back to the exam room and we talked it over a bit and he explained that I could go home and think everything over and if I had any more questions I could call or email him. He also let me try a few implants in my bra to give me sort of an idea of what would be there...my bra I was wearing didn't help much though since it was padded....lol.
So with all this said and done...my husband asked "Whens the soonest you can get her in?" and Dr.G jokingly replied with "How does your afternoon look?" lol My husband also wants to make it a point that he is happy with the way I am now and this is all my decision :) Anyways, I was then sent back to talk with the scheduler to set up an appt. I scheduled it for August 8th @ 5:30...need to be there at 4. They used today as my pre op appt as well and gave me more papers to sign. I paid it all in full today and they sent me back to talk with the RN about procedure day :) They also gave me my prescriptions to get filled and I was on my way.
So 8 days!! This will go by fast considering I missed a consult last week and the next week came so fast!!
I feel like I am forgetting to say something but will post later if I can think of anything I guess.
I did decide on this for surgery day:
Silicone, non textured, round
Under the muscle
378cc in Left breast
358cc in Right breast
90 min procedure
Eeek Cant wait!!
OH, I also LOVED the fact that Dr. Gutowski is not all about the money. He told me it is a myth to get the procedure redone ever 10 yrs. People will have them for 20+ years before a rupture and with the gels there is no reason to actually remove it unless there is pain. That would all be up to me. I was actually worried about procedures later in life and the saline rupturing....so I was impressed with all he had to say today.
Here are some before pictures....*blush* I am SO ready to take some after pictures already...only 6 more days :) These days are not going by fast enough!
Underarms!! and other stuff....
So Ive been reading online of things to do before surgery day to make post op easier...how many ladies have gotten their underarms waxed?! lol I thought about doing it but really dont want to spend the $20 to do it when i can put it towards a new bra. So I decided To let my hair grow for a few days to make for a more smooth shave day of surgery...no razor bumps. Looks like i cant go more then a couple days without needing to shave and i feel gross. So will be shaving tomorrow and hope I can wait til Thursday morning for the next shave :-/
oh and dont mind the tag on my nighty...lol. I just bought that tonite bc i realized id have no pjs to wear to bed (I wear bigger shirts) so I found something i can step into and pull up...
Brings me to another question...i know the underarm incision has to be uncomfortable and dressing in normal clothes probably takes a longer time to be able to do. and the crease insicion i can imagine is sore with rubbing of the bra. So who here has actually got the incision through the nipple?? That is what I am doing and I feel it may be an easier recovery and less pain when raising the arms and stuff?? I was only able to find 2 button up shirts the other night (i did not own any before) so i am hoping 2 days of button ups is it... I just have no interest on most button/zip up stuff and did not want to spend too much to start. I need to see what my size is first and find stuff then...
The rice test and cc's
So Ive been doing a lot of thinking tonight. I put the rice in my sports bra...again. How many of you have actually done that? and if you already got your boobs done...did it seem pretty accurate? I almost feel as if I am going too small and should bump up the ccs a little more. Im getting 378 in my left and 352 in my right...thinking maybe i should bump it up to 400 in my left and 378 in my right?? I do not want to look super fake either so now im stressed and hoping i do the right thing.... Im interested in hearing others stories on this...
Doubts about my implant sizes...
So the other night while doing the rice test I started having doubts about the size implants I am scheduled to be getting. So I You Tubed, looked up blogs and forums...went into crazy mode trying to find similar body types with my size implants to see if I liked the results. Well, I wasn't having much luck bc I know that just because someones the same hieght and weight as me does not mean their breast are identical to mine so I just gave up. Then I decided Id just try to email my Dr. I let him know how I was feeling and questioned if I could go up to 378cc in my right and 400cc in the left to make it a little bit bigger and still get a more natural look. I also said that maybe If they emailed me my 3D images that it could help assure me I am doing the right thing. I don't want to be one of the girls who wish they would have gone bigger but I also don't want to be upset bc I went too big and did not get that natural look I am going for.
So, not even a full 24hrs later (last night 10:30pm) I got an email back from my PS. I was very surprised to be getting an email back on his Saturday night! I feel I have a great PS who really does care about his patients!! He did email me my 3D images (will be posting those soon...need to use my desktop computer bc the images wont upload from my phone or laptop and unfortunately my hubby is using that) And what a sigh of relief seeing those images was...I do feel they will be big enough. And at times if I feel I could use a little more, well I guess I will invest in a push up bra as well :) Either way it wont be like now trying to push something up that I do not have! So Dr. G also wrote along with the images...He says my chest wall is not wide enough to get the look I am trying to achieve if I go any bigger. He also said we could talk about doing a high profile but the tops of my breasts will not look at natural that way either. He asked if I would look at the images and If I am not happy still If we could arrange a time for Monday to talk about this. So I did look at the images and I definately felt assured I was going for the right thing with what I have planned initially so 378cc in the left and 354cc in the right. I know I will be very happy after Thursday! :) So keep a look out for my 3D images...will post sometime tonite.
I couldn't figure out how to change the file so I just took a picture with my cell...hope this works.
Tooomorrow, Tooomorrow; Its only a day away!!! :)
Whoo hoo...I'm super excited for tomorrow. It will be here before I know it. Have a fairly busy day today. I work pm shift til 11:30, then I will be going to Walmart to get groceries (yay for 24/7 grocey shopping). Then I will wake up tomorrow and do a last load of laundry, sweep and mop floors, vacuum, bathrooms and then the last sink of dishes. After I have a clean house I will be heading to a friends house with the kids so I can get my hair braided (french braids down the sides) and by that time I'm hoping my husband will be on his way home from work to shower and then we will all be on the road! Hubby will be taking the kids to see Smurfs 2 while I'm in surgery and to play at the mall thays next door. Only thing I am nervous about is what to tell my son when this is all over? ? He is 6 and at the stage where he will notice (mommy was just at the pool with him not too long ago and had nothing...) We plan to tell him I am having surgery and that's nothing new to him since he knows I've had c sections...I just don't know what to say surgery is for this time... :-/ any suggestions??
on my way...almost there :)
8 Aug 2013
Day of treatment
Nerves are starting to kick in now... It starting to feel real and I can't believe I'm finally going to do this! Today went by super fast with all my cleaning, precooking meals and prepping my area for when I get home. Still haven't told the kids. Guess Im going to leave that to my husband when he leaves me behind to take the kids to the mall:-/ and I'm starving right niw! Forced myself to eat a breakfast bc I couldn't eat past 8:30...won't get to start eating til 7-7:30. Well...almost "naptime" ladies :) Ill update asap!
all done and coming out of anesthisa. ..lol
8 Aug 2013
Day of treatment
Still drugger up...anesthesia. ..wanted to post asap...haha
tired and want sleep...
8 Aug 2013
Day of treatment
Think I'm being made fun of I asked for my phone as soon as I woke up...lol. sugery went well and I'm feeling good so far. A lil heavy in the chest and tight but it all a ok...more update later...didn't aant to let everyone wait...lol
8 Aug 2013
Day of treatment
Here's some more pics before I hit the sac...I'm really tired!
Also my hubby just told the kids I had to get my boobs fixed...it worked and I don't really feel akward about it. They are being understanding and cool with it. I'm just so dam happy right now! Lol
sore and troubles sleeping
Well, here I am, awake at 3:30am (3:50 now). I just can't seem to sleep. This sleeping upright is not for me :-/. My back is sore from it and now my boobs are feeling tighter which isn't helping w my back pain. I'm trying to stay on top of my norco. Not sure if its even helping really. When I left last night from the place I felt great like I could concure the world. But that was probably the fetinal and norco mix they gave me for my drive home and to help me fall asleep...lol. My doctor reccomends not arm movement...to keep hads at my sides as much as possible until further notice. I'm already a little antsy about that. I've heard other girls are told to raise hands to the ceiling 5 times every hour. I feel like that may help but ill wait for my phone call tomorrow. Maybe they will give me the go ahead to do something. Thinking about getting some ice packs right now then heading to the recliner for a bit. Ill update again later.
Had to take a peek underneath...could be why I'm so sore...my boobs took quite beating going in I guess. And that's just one part...wonder how much more bruising there is?!
End of Day 1 post op
My back kills!! I can not get comfortable while sleeping and I'm just so tired. My boobs don't hurt really...sore and can't use my peck muscles obviously but not really painful. I'm keeping up on my meds just bc I'm afraid of what could be I guess and since my back hurts. My hubby says my back may be hurting from the meds though so idk. He just rubbed my back where it hurts and it felt OH SO GOOD. I mean it instintly relieved the pain...didn't really feel great...lol. well going to go pee and try to go back to sleep. :-/
Day 2 PO
Well today wasn't as bad as yesterday. I went out to the mall today. Loooed around VS and explained my story to one of the workers (they just somehow get into your business asking a million questions...lol) I just said I was browsing bc I was going to buy a bra soon but not today. Then she heard me tell my husband I won't be able to wear an underwire for a while. .. Its amazing how damn near everyone you meet wants to do the procedure as well. Lol. So I ended up leaving there with some ideas in mind of what I will go back for soon enough. Then I went to Walmart and gotna sports bra for when I get the ok. Got a Daskin 360 (I think that's what its called) it is comfy - I put it on over my surgical bra and can't wait to try it on the right way tomorrow *just for a min* I will be able to shower tomorrow and finally get a look at the twins and Ill take a couple pics :) Can't wait!! Prob get an early bedtime tonite. I've got a family work picnic tomorrow and all my co workers can't wait to see me *or my chest* lol.
Beginning of Day 3 PO
Had a horrible sleep last night. Fell asleep in the recliner (better then being propped up in bed bc I feel like I don't have support and will fall over) at around 11. Woke up at 1am because my tv was still on and my husband was still up. So I was awake til 4. Talked to my husband for a bit, went online, watched a show and iced until my eyes started to close on me. Woke up again at 7:30 with a headache and a sore back. Headache is prob from the crappy sleep and back is from the recliner. I found yesterday that most of the pain goes away after I walk it out. I really like going for wallks and moving around during the day. As much as I like my sleep Its just no fun anymore....lol. So in a little bit I will be getting in the shower. My hair really could use one now. It started itching last night and I can just feel the oil when I pulled back my hair this morning...yuck! But hey, its good for your hair so Im ok with it ;) I will be sure to take a few pics soon and post when I can by the end of tonite. I have a family picnic at my work today so I will be a little busy with that. Chat with you all soon :)
Day 3 PO end
So, I know I said I would post pics tonight but I think I will be posting them tomorrow. I want to retake pictures tomorrow with my actual camera bc today I used my phone and just do not like how they turned out. Anyways after my back pain this morning things started to feel better and now I just feel really engorged. And that is pain I can tolerate pretty well. I went to my work today and everyone was staring at me. One co worker was brave enough to say I dont look any different then before. Which I agree. With clothes on I look like I did before with my padded bra on. I also am wearing my compressed surgical bra and hoping this is why I am looking so small. I am actually a little disappointed now that I have seen them. I have asked a few girlfriends of mine about the drop and fluff and so far 2 answered back saying they actually felt bigger with the swelling then went to their size. If thats what is happening with me I am going to be depressed. I wanted at least a full C but a small D would have been great. Ive seen a lot of pics of girls who resemble my pre op size and went less cc's then I did and got Ds and even DDs. I have my post op Wed so I will be having a talk w my dr. Hoping I hear good news and he says I will round out more and gain another cup or 2. Otherwise I almost feel like I need a redo and to get a little bigger. I hate the idea of spending so much money to look how i did to start. :(
Day 4 PO
So today I took lots of pictures and did comparisons. I am feeling better about everything when I look at the before and afters but I still with I was a cup size bigger and Id be happier. I can't say it enough but I hope drop and fluff really fluffs me up an extra cup...maybe 2! Im not sure if things have dropped at all yet or not I was suposed to have my breast evened out and the one still looks smaller and less full then the other...unless one is dropping already? I have been a little sore today. Its not painful, just tight and i feel extremely compressed in this bra. Hoping thats another sign of getting bigger. I also think its more my bruising that bothers me. Should go away soon...cant wait! I have not taken any meds today. The last of anything I took was during the night last night- tylenol extra strength. I woke up with a lot of back pain still so I attempted to lay on my side for a little bit and that seemed to help once I found the comfy position. Im still afraid to sleep on my side because I don't want the implants to go where they sholdn't. My left implant, while I was walking today, seemed to pulse like it wanted to jump out of my chest. Maybe a muscle trying to relax...idk. Anyways, heres my pictures. If i can think of anything else that needs updating I will do that. Otherwise, I will update after my follow up on wednesday.
I thought I put a collage of the side views...
Day 5 PO
Just wanted to say I slept all night on my side. Once you start you cant stop...lol. I was so comfortable. I would randomly wake up and tell myself to lay on my back but it would instantly start hurting so id go back to my side. I have not takin any meds today. Only took something last night before bed. Im afraid of being uncomfortable while sleeping.
pain in my left crease??
As the night goes on my mild pain that I was having this morning (was so mild I didn't think to mention it) has turned into a bad pain. Im not sure why its hurting so much. At first I thought It was the way my surgical bra was- up too high- so i loosened the straps to make more room for the boobs. It seemed to have helped a little hen the pain came back again. Then I decided to unbutton the whole darn thing and rest my boobs for a few. It didn't seem to really help. My right side is not really bad at all and my left just hurts. does anyone know why this may be? Could it be the implant trying to get into the pocket? I know the Dr had made extra cuts there to help stretch the skin but i really didn't think it would make a dif in pain and I thought i read before that dropping isn't supposed to hurt. But I was thinking..if it wasn't for the pain in the crease Id feel great! Can't wait for my post op tomorrow...I want answers.
1 WEEK PO APPT
Gosh can't believe it will be a full week tomorrow! Time is flying by. So I had my 1 week post op today. I went in and they pulled out my stitches. My left side got a little stuck and started oozing some...now it burns and my whole left boob is sore btwn that and the crease hurting. My right boob is fine for the most part...feels mostly normal. They said I still have some swelling so he would like me to wear the surg bra with strap or a sports bra with an ace bandage (since my strap is connected to my surg bra). If I need to wear a reg bra for a little while I got permission. I can sleep on my side or stomach if comfortable. I got instruction on the massages they would like me to do as well. I go back next week and can't talk about getting rid of this surgical bra for good! :) They also said to give it a couple weeks to determine if I like the size or not but really I can't go any bigger. He showed me how my skin between the breast stretches and that there is no more room. The only way they could go is out toward my arms and I'd be rubbing up on them all the time. And I agree with him on that as I can already feel myself do that if I'm paying attention...lol. either way its more boob then before. Went to Victorias Secret to try on a bra but my nipple was so sore and still a little oozy so I decided not to :( going to wait it out...maybe next week ill go. Anyways the appt was very informative and I will be going back again next week so he can check to see if they have dropped any after massages and continued use of the strap :)
Official 1 week Post Op and massages
I am going to do my week by week post ops on Fridays since my procedure was in the evening on Thursday. I will take pictures on Friday mornings and post them. I like to take morning pictures so i am not so full or bloated from being up all day...lol. Anyways... I took my 1 week pics this morning and i still have yet to put them side by side with my 4 day post op (prob wont be much of a difference if any but still hope to see something) If no difference I wont post them and will wait til week 2 pics. Any who, I started massages after my appointment on Thursday. They seem to be a painful at the bottom of my boobs while doing them. I have the massages that u pinch the bottom of the boob to get the implant to rise up and fall back down when u release pressure...i push the bottom of my boob up to basically to the same thing and then i pill the top of my breast upward til my nipple goes up to get the implant to go back down....hoping the massages work. it does help with ithing and seems to help soften a bit. I cant wait to do them without any pain really. When the nurse was showing me how to do them it didnt hurt at all...so im not sure if im doing something wrong or if its just bc it hurts when you do it yourself as apposed to someone else doing it? IDK... Going to try to see if the shower helps since ive read online about people doing it in the shower with warm water....so we shall see.
2 weeks PO
So I took pictures this morning and tried doing side by sides but for some reason itwas not working out how I had pplanned and I gave up. Honestly, I'm not seeing much of a difference. I never start d off real high I don't think sobits hard to judge it. I do think my left side is up higher then my right and that's probably bc I have a bigger implant in that side. I'm still wearing my surgical bra with strap. It really feels better anyways. Ill wear my sports bra for a bit if I leave the house but I start to feel really hard on top after a while so I looke forward to my surgical bra. I washed it again yesterday so during that process...I let it air dry...I use my sporysbra with and ace wrap.its getting a little easier every night to sleep on my side but stomach sleeping...forget that! Lol I literally feel like I am laying on balls under my chest...its too wierd. So I'd say physically everythings doing ok...Dr said give it another week or 2 before I go back to my workouts the way I did. I try to do some lunges and squats here and there but I've found I feel so lazy right now. I'm very stressed and a lot going on in my household. On top of that I'm still feeling depressed about my size...I want bigger. Was I really THAT small to start bc I don't feel like I've made too big of a difference with all this. Im bummed...I had a feeling this was going to happen to me. I told myself I would wait til my next appt (in 5 weeks) before making any real decisions on what I want to do about it. Hoping that's enough time to learn to like them and not be so down about it. Maybe the change in shape will help me feel bigger. But as of right now I feel like I should have gone high profile and more ccs. I keep seeing all these woman wanlking around with a big chest and I feel back to where I started. Yes, I now have cleavage without having to actually try and I can wear a padded bra to enhance what I have now to look what I'd like to be but I want to not have to wear a padded bra ever again. I love my doctor. He did as I asked. They look natural. But I guess I didn't realize what I wanted was a more fake look. Not over the top but enough to be big...after all everyone knows they r fake anyways. Once I feel good enough I will get back to working out and dieting...hoping that helps my stomach shrink and my boobs "grow" worth a try. Anyways, I think I will wait to post pics til next week...hoping a difference is really seen then.
Well, today I measured myself again (since swellings down) and I'm measuring an inch smaller around the bust then the last time I measured. Idk what size that even makes me now?? :-/ So I decided I can not wait til my next appt to say anything and emailed my RN about it. Now waiting for a response to see where to go from here. I told myself in the beginning that I would not do the surgery again...just to go bigger...but I want to be sure I am happy and not settling and getting used to it. I don't want to wait for a possible break or just 10 years to replace or whatever. I'm thinking high profile and many more ccs. I'd like a D...so we shall see.
talked to my Dr
So I talked to my Dr a little while ago. We talked about how I feel. He said to give it a few weeks til our next scheduled appt or I can go in a week earlier if I'm too anxious (that I am!!) And we will talk about size and see what we can do to make me happy. So I'm excited and cant wait til next months end :-/ such a long ways away but it gives me some more drop time and time to see some possible changes but I just don't predict much happening. So possible revision coming soon!
amazing what a day can do in BA world
2 nights ago I still felt a little uncomfortable sleeping too far on my side/stomach and last night I felt brand new! I noticed I could lay on my back completelt flat with no problems or feeling uncomfortable...laying on my side is more comfortabke a d I was even able to sleep on my stomach!! That made me SO happy...best sleep in awhile. I'm able to bend over without it feeling too weird...starting to feel normal. They are more squishy...natural feeling. I can squish them together without feeling like 2 rocks. Its just amazing what one day can do! BUT yesterday is when I noticed I felt smaller and measured and lost an inch on my bust. So my guess is swelling went down and made my boobs more apart of me. Its nice to see this happening but at the same time knowing to go bigger I have to do this and go through this all again....hoping a second recovery is faster like I've read :-/
its a Love/Hate relationship
So...I've been obsessing over my boobs the past few days. Today I really stared at them for a long time and then I squished them and tried to see the good in them. I noticed that I really like them when I'm naked...its obviously way more then I had before and they do make me more properly proportioned. The shape is nice and now that they are softer they are more likeable. But I still do think bigger is better...I'm not going to lie. Now if I was to be in a nudist colony then sure, I would be very happy with them BUT I'm afraid that were I live we wear clothes and as soon as I put them on its like "where did they go??" Now if I wear a tight shirt they look good but 7 out of 10 times I'm not going to be wearing a form fitted t shirt :-/ I wear scrubs at my job and would like to feel like a woman...even in them. I'm posting some pictures I just took with my camera phone...I don't want to mess with my computer and side by sides. That just seems to get me upset...lol. oh...and now here's a little dilemma I am going to be running into real soon. I just got word I will be having an interview for a new job sometime this week. I shouldn't have a problem getting the job so now I'm worried about how to break the news to my potential new job that I need to take a few days off? I don't want to look bad but I also don't want to skip out on my revision either... :-/
Ok ladies...today was my first REAL attempt at exercising! Before this I would do some squats here and there...a few lunges...go on a walk but If I cant get a real workout in I get lazy and feel a couple lunges or squats just aren't going to do the trick and I stop. I was actually a surrogate and had a baby (via c-section) April 3rd...I started working out at the end of April when I felt good enough to. My goal was to get to 150lbs before getting my boobs done. At the time I started to workout I was 189lbs! I got down to 160 at mid July and decided I didn't want to wait any longer so that's when I started my research and I had surgery August 8th...seems so long ago! lol Well, after surgery and not working out and having the added weight in my chest I lost weight but it was muscle Im sure as I feel fatter then before! This morning I weighed in at 155.5! I am very happy about that and feel the scale can't go anywhere but down now :) So I didn't want to get into my normal Jillian Michaels workouts bc she does a lot of upper body...push ups, burpys, and a lot of stuff that requires my "do not use" muscles. I decided I will keep it light this week and did The biggest Losers Power Walk dvd...If I were to do this before I would barely have broke a sweat...if I did and would be ready for more. This dvd is more of a warm up dvd or something just to do bc you feel you have to workout but don't want to sweat so much it requires a shower. Well, I am out of shape again. This has made me realize I need to get back to eating better (I tend to give up on that if Im not working out...they go hand in hand for me). This workout kicked my but really...did not hurt the boobs. I modified the sprints into a light jog while holding my boobs...lol. Honestly though it felt great!! I've missed exercising!! And I can definately tell which boob has more dropping to do. Doing a few of the exercises I almost felt like I lost my right boob...It felt heavier, but normal. My left side feels more like something is stuck to me and in my way...like I have to be more careful with it. Im excited to see how everything feels a week from now. I cant wait to get back into my old routine....only to have to go through this all again :-/ While going through all the times Ive been pregnant and gained weight and had to lose it I have found having a longer rest period and bad eating habits helps my metabolism when I start working out again so maybe its a good thing ;)
Sorry ladies It has been a little while since posting. I was waiting til I knew for sure what was going on. I am (as of today) scheduled for a revision on this up coming Tuesday 9/10 at 7:30am. My Dr will be switching out my implants(354/378 MP) with sizes 550/600 HP. And to make this a fun experience and to minimize the cost I opted to use local anesthesia. I am actually VERY excited about this! I do not personally know anyone who has done this but it definately sounds interesting being able to communicate with my PS during the procedure! He did prescribe me a valium and told me to take that and 2 norcos an hour before my surgery...this will be interesting as I have NEVER taken a valium before either...lol. I may have to have my husband take video of that! Chances are I will pass out (fall asleep) on the table bc the drug mix with being tired already as I have to leave my house at 5:30....means up at 4:30! So that is my update on that. I also posted pics earlier of my insicions as of today. My PS took off the tape since there is really no need to keep it on with him having to cut it back open in less then a week...I cant believe its so soon! I just want to get it over with an be super happy already! :)
Second time around nerves
It is crazy how before your first surgery you expect BIG results and are not nervous but excited. Then you wake up and realize you are not that big and are a lil dissappointed (thinking D&F will be ur friend...didn't see it happening) and just saying 'you will LEARN to love them' well I'm sorry...I paid too much to learn to love them...I just want to love them. So you set up your revision and then that's when the nerves hit. I am so nervous! I guess putting up a stink and not being so happy with the smaller but larger size then I had that I am now afraid of going to big. I keep telling myself that I have done my math and I'm not going to be a in the second half of the alphabet or anything. If a 354/378 took me up 1 1/2 cup sizes then the extra ccs will probably only bring me up 1 more (a lil dissappointing in itself but I would be happy w a C of boob) but with the shape and side boob I pedict to have I may fill out a D cup...that's exciting! But then I just think...going from a AAto a D....hoping my body takes I well and they look nice. Idk...I feel confident in my PS...he wouldn't make me look rediculous I don't think...lol. And this is why I am happy I will be awake during the surgery! Tuesday can't come and go fast enough! Yet again in boobiland...more waiting! :-/
Here are pics...braless and one with a moderate push up...I'd like to look like the push up without a bra...that size would be nice...i wouldnt mind a lil bigger either ;) I jusy don't feel I should have to wear a pushup/padded bra to get the look I want. Now adding a push up bra to what I want is a different story.
Went to VS tonite and returned my sports bra and wireless bra...got bigger sizes for now and can always return them if they don't fit. While at the mall I passed all these awesome swimsuit sales...definately going to get me a new swimsuit top...booking a hotel room in late October...even if I can't go all the way in I'm going to wear a bikini top ;) Then I went to walmart...filled my scripts and grabbed a couple front buttoning bras (my surg bra was white and I don't want to use it for right after surgery) then I grabbed an ankle wrap...its perfect for the boob band! For 2 bras and the band I spent under $25! When they charge $50 for a surgical bra! Then I grabbed 2 more button down shirts...they don't button all the way down but enough so I can step in if need be but I think I will be ok without a button up really. I wore my cheapy walmart moderate push up bra $4 since I had to exchange my VS bras and I've got to say I felt pretty confident tonite. I'm excited for it to be all boob and no padding! I'm starting to feel real good and not nervous about going bigger now. Cant wait til Tuesday! Work the next 3 days then Monday will be cleaning day and early bedtime...will have to leave the house by 5:30am on Tuesday :-/
So less then 2 days til my 'do over' and I am feeling so good physically. I am happy about it, yet I am bummed bc now I have to do it all again. I exercised the one day then just got lazy. Its hard to get back into working out after so long of not doing so and then knowing a second surgery is to come. Today it was very noticeable when I run I have a 'natural' boob jiggle and I am able to do full blown jumping jacks and punches and stuff without any bother to my boobs....now I cant wait til after surgery on Tuesday til I feel like this again :-/ I really need to get my workouts in!
round 2...on my way
Well, I am on my way. I'm tired. Been up since 4:30 since we decided to leave at 5:30. I have a feeling that I will fall asleep on the table since I already am very tired and have yet to take my medication...at 6:30. I took a ton of pics last night to compare to. I did forget to use my regular camera :-/ and just used my phone camera. Now all I keep thinking is...I hope I'm doing the right thing and that this do over is worth it. I will update asap after surgery...around 8:30-9 :)
Here are my before revision pics...
revision done local and have a happy girl here :)
I've only got 2 pics as of now...take more and better ones at home. But local went VERY well. There was a time he went to use the electric thing to cut tissue inside and I felt it zap me...didn't tickle that's for sure. So they numbed me some more and went to try again and I still felt it. So he went and stitched up my right boob and then went back and there was no more pain. Over all surgery was great. I did not fall asleep. Closed my eyes while listening to them...I didn't like starring at the blue sheet...lol. after it was over they took tbe sheet away and my PS said 'Please tell me you see a difference?! And laughed' It is def noticeable! I have yet to see them naked from the side view but looking down there's a big difference. I think I've mad it to my D :) LOVE my PS...he's great :) anyways more pics later...
camera happy :)
Its safe to say I'm loving them :)
before and after revision
Crazy the difference....It doesn't look like I had a BA before...lol. I guess I started off way flatter then I thought!
And let the healing begin!
So I fell asleep on the couch from like noon to 2...I forced myself to wake up or I wont want to sleep tonite! And already from 2hrs of sleeping upright...wasn't sitting up real high and was able to turn to my side some (im too afraid to lay all the way down or to my side even though I probably can)...my back kills! This is that part of thr healing process I hate...I really dislike back pain! :-(
feelings 1 day PO
First off I felt great last night but then my kids got sick. First my daughter caught a fever and then my son and to top that my daughter decided she had to throw up twice as well. Both kids woke up with fevers again this morning so I have been taking care of them as best I can. I slept on the couch last night with my daughter on the floor, with her sleeping bag, beside me. (she did not want to go to bed and decided the livingroom floor was most comfy) So throughout the night I was up with my daughter and noticed my horrible back pain...this part of recovery sucks sleeping upright! I also noticed that I can definately feel the areas he worked on inside. the outer sides of my breast where he extended the pockets and my left crease he lowered a little more to fit in the implant. So my left side is a little more sore with the extra work but its not as bad as the first time. I also do not have that feeling of engorgement...i think was possibly the swelling last time... this time around. I think the worst part is my back pain since I can ice my boobs and the cold helps with that pain like 90%. BUT to top off my back pain I have caught whatever my kids have. I started a slight fever 99.4 and had a major headache. I thought at first my headache was possibly from the valium yesterday as a side affect or something but then realized I had a fever too and then started to feel nauseous. So I ate a peppermint and I think that's helped with that. My husband text me earlier bc he smashed his finger at work real bad and blood gushed everywhere...Im thinking we may have a family visit to the doctor later :-/ Perfect timing for all of this to happen now! ugh
oh and Right nipple...
I also noticed that my right nipple is hyper sensitive...more than before. I was thinking it would end up numb like my left side with being cut open a second time. I wish I was numb...lol I hate that i cant hardly move without that nipple sensitivity hurting me...lol
Day 2 PO
I am feeling much better today!! Less back pain...guess I found more comfy sleep postions on the couch last night. still upright but turned to the side a bit and more pillows... May try sleeping in my bed tonite although sleeping on the couch has been nice with my daughter next to me. Turns out my kids have a viral infection. Fevers are under control and just stuck with sore throats. My headache has subsided for the most part...very mild at the moment. I was able to take my shower this morning and that felt great! My range of motion has been much easier then then the first time around so it was a nice shower. Driving is pretty good too...just have to make small adjustments when turning the wheel a certain way is all. Boob pain is minimal and I just cant wait to feel like I did at 4 weeks this last time! I have a feeling that will come soon though. I need to get my workouts on! Cant wait for my OLD routine to come into play :)
OMG...I am just in love with my boobs tonite! Went to good ol Walmart tonite and got me a bandeau and bralette along w my swimsuit top and I am just amazed in the difference. I have never worn one of these kinds of bras bc I would have been super flat and manly...I have worn a tube bra way back when and I didn't have boobs to hold it up so I never wore it. I have to say this was the look I was going for! I don't feel I have to wear a padded push up bra to feel like a woman :) once myboobs soften up I will go try on a push up bra just for fun and for times I may want a lil more but really I don't see a reason to have to! I am one happy girl right now and love that I have such an awesome PS!
Last night I had this really weird bad dream (a bunch of bad dreams actually) but the only part I really rememeber was looking at my boobs and they were a deflated C... I was freaking out bc they had no volume whatsoever! And recently I had a dream that my left boob was twisted to where it was dangling frok a string of skin like a tooth getting ready to fall out of a kids mouth. So this morning I decided to dye my hair and in the process I'm thinking about my boobs and starring at them and all of a sudden I feel small again. I try on my D bra and I notice its too big in some areas...so its back to VS to teade in for my C :-/ I am still very happy with them. They look great and I'm not a B and have a noticeable difference in clothes now without any padding. Its what I initially wanted. But any swelling I had is totally gone today. I only have a little pain in my left crease area. My right nipple isn't as sensitive either. Still no feeling in my left though. They already have a slight jiggle and I'm feeling close to where I was at a month with the first BA. So its time to tighten up my tummy and lose some inches to 'grow' my boobs...lol. I'm sure I'm over thinking everything and my feeling will be different tomorrow. Either way I am very happy to have these boobs and I can def hold out for 10-15 years to get bigger if I must ;)
1 week revision post op
Went to my post op today...was exciting! Stitches are out and I can start massaging again (was waiting for the ok) My PS says I can resume normal exercises (as tolerated) in about a week and I'm more than ready for that! I am able to ditch my band and wear whatever bra I am comfortable in :) I also got me old implants to take home! It was a great appointment...lol. I brought my PS and his staff a thank you card along with some homemade raspberry cookies and white and milk chocolate covered pretzels...hope they really do like them and my PS wasn't pulling my chain ;) Don't go back for another month now so I'm not sure I will have much to post til then....here's some pics or first BA/day of revision/and 9 days PO revision. I am definately loving the fuller HP look!
Here's my newest bikini top! Spent just under $10 on it (on clearance at target plus it had gum stuck to part of it so got an extra 10% off) and I just love it! Love my new boobs and can't be any happier with them right now :)
my husbands opinion
So I'm trying on my swimsuit tops and stuff tonite for my hubby and I told him how I love that I'm proportioned and not embarrassed to wear a bikini top (past few yrs I've worn tankini tops) He say...I dont know about proportioned. Those things are huge! So when I said...I honestly wouldnt mind them a little bigger he gave me the crazy look...lol. I told him its crazy how I I can put on a bikini top and look huge and then put on a shirt and 'disappear' and that's when he said...you did this to be happy not look like a whore. Haha oops...lol. But I really don't disappear...I'm wearing a lace bralette and look bigger than I did in my padded bra so I'm loving them :)
more bra shopping
This bra shopping is going to get me into trouble! Lol. Went to VS today just to try on the 36C since I have the D and feel its too big. Well the C fit best I think. I liked the snug fit better than the loose fit but I think I culd wear either if I wanted to with that bra style. Of course I didn't bring my other bra back to return so Ill do that another day. But while there I figured I'd get in on my free panty coupon then decided to use my $10 off a bra coupon and then got 2 bras 2/$49.50 deal and then got another free panty for jsing my angel card ;) $42 well spent...lol. I tried on some push ups but they did not look or feel right no matter what size I tried on...36C, 36D, 34D... I assume its bc the implants are HP...with the mod plus I was able to wear a push up and look ok. Of course I'm only 1.5 weeks out and they are not super squishy so ill try a push up later on down the road. The bras I got are (I think) the T shirt demi...extremely lightly lined (if you even consider it that). I've got to say the underwire is not extremely comfy at this point but they are cute and its not padded...also with the HP I have the cleavage without the pushup and the underwire pushes them together just enough. Almost looks like a padded bra bht is obviously not :) I'm enjoying boobs and no padding!