I DID IT!! AA to Full C/Small D 36y.o., 5'4", 130 - 325/350 Silicone, Sub-muscular, Inframammary Incision

I've never had a very large chest, but always a...

I've never had a very large chest, but always a respectable 36B/C. I had my son at 32 and nursed him for 14 months. Shortly after weaning, I lost a lot of volume. I recently lost about twenty pounds and have just about nothing left! I started thinking about breast augmentation two years ago and said, "Well, if I still want to do it next year, I'll do it." That year came and went and I was still unhappy. Ultimately, after I lost the weight and started taking really good care of my body, I became increasingly frustrated with knowing I was never going to be able to fix my breasts through diet or exercise. This summer I started really considering it and talking to my husband, who has been incredibly supportive throughout the process. He says he loves me the way I am, but supports my decision too. Now that the surgery date is set, he's enjoying helping to choose my "wish pics" and talking about what I envision for size. ;) Here are my before pics and current stats. I'm getting silicone unders, but haven't settled on a size yet. I'd like to end up at a full C, small D (something manageable still for running and workout out.) I'm 5'4", 130 pounds, and have a current bra size of 34AA.

Wish Pics

I've been thinking a lot lately about the size of the implants I'd like to get. When I first met with my PS at the initial consultation, I said is like to be a full C. But now I'm thinking I should tell him more of a small D so I don't suffer from "boob envy" (a term I learned quickly reading the reviews here!) Has anyone had success making the rice sizers and having the results come out similar after surgery? I might try some tonight... Also, I told one of my gym friends today about the surgery. She was super supportive and great about the whole thing. She was understanding and even said, "You don't have to justify this to anyone." Totally agree!

In the meantime, here are a few pics I'll show my PS. I think I'm going to (jokingly) say, "Let's pretend you're entering a contest for world's best breast augmentation. And go!" ;)

Rice sizers!

450ccs???? Way bigger than I originally thought I'd go with, but I decided to make some rice sizers and try them on. Yikes! It's been a couple of years since I had my nursing boobs and I forgot what having them felt like! I put the sizers into one of my nursing bras, and yep, they used to be that big (if not bigger)! I tried them on with a bathing suit, bras, and tank to get an idea of what life would be like. I'm also keeping in mind that I'm going under the muscle and will lose some volume to that. Am I keeping it suburban mom classy or have I crossed over into showgirls territory? Do you think I'll have boob envy and should go larger?

Bathing suit blues and some more wish pics

I've spent the past week on the lake with my family and I'm thankful that this will be the last time I'll spend here without being to fill out my bikini tops. I'm constantly pulling at my tops and making sure they haven't shifted (they're so big that they slide around and I'm expecting a nip slip any moment!) My next appointment with my PS is on Friday and I have some photos to bring to show what I want (and what I don't!) I've also decided that I'm not going to worry about the ccs anymore. I'm just going to use the pics to communicate what I want and let him handle it. If I'm going to pay this much money, then I'm going to trust my research on my surgeon. Since I'm more than a few credits short of graduating from medical school, I'll trust his expertise. ;)

Paid in Full - Let the Final Preparations Begin! :)

I went in to the office today to pay for the surgery and pick up my vitamins. I'll stop taking my regular vitamins and herbal supplements and switch to these starting tomorrow. It's getting real now! I also made an appointment for a second consult with the PS just to go over size the Monday before my surgery. I don't want to try on sizers or anything, but I do need to alter my initial wishes with my PS. I remember using phrases like "C cup" and "totally natural" and I think this will make me ultimately wish I had gone bigger. I think he said something like 350/375 and based on pictures I've seen, and how little volume I'm starting with, I think I'll need more. I won't get hung up on numbers, but I want to be a D cup which I think I'll be able to dress up or down, depending on the event and my mood. :)

I also started making plans for the recovery period. My parents are very graciously taking my three-year-old two days before and one week following my surgery. This gives me time to clean, cook, shop, and rest without having to worry about lifting and caring for 36 pounds of pre-schooler! My husband will take off the day of surgery (Friday) and then we'll have the weekend together. Hopefully by Monday I'll be in good enough shape to sit in the recliner, watch TV, and sleep all day by myself. He's also taken the time off for my post-op appointments. Very grateful! I've been working out every day and I'll start eating fresh pineapple every morning, beginning tomorrow. (The only fruits I usually eat are berries, grapefruit, and apples so this will be a real treat!) I also saw a great pin on making smoothies ahead of time, pouring them into ice cube trays, and freezing them for future use. Brilliant! They always separate in the fridge, so this will be great to make ahead as I attempt to keep my diet on track post surgery. I'll have fresh fruit already washed and ready-to-eat along with other meals that I can just reheat. I already drink a gallon of water a day and stay away from salt, sugar, and flour, so I'm hoping my diet assists in the healing process too. I'm not unaware of the complications that can arise, but I'm meditating and doing positive visualizations! (I'm not completely into the New Age thing, but it can't hurt, right??)

Finally, I've started a list of post-op goodies to keep nearby: dry shampoo, lip balm, bendy straws for my water cup, ice packs (I'm making the moldable ones with water and alcohol in baggies), and coconut water (heading to the health food store to find an organic, unpasteurized one). My husband and dad are moving a recliner we have in the basement into the family room so I can rest and potentially sleep there (we'll see how I feel in bed). I'm already a back sleeper, so that won't be too bad. The first few days with all that swelling though... it might be better to stay more upright.

So I think that's about it! Oh, I did tell my gym/trainers about the surgery (but not what it was exactly) so I'll be placing a hold on my membership for two months. I am determined to give it the full recovery time and not go back too early. I'll walk in the neighborhood and see how I'm feeling come October... I know I'll probably gain some weight, but it's to be expected and I'm not going to beat myself up over it. The most important thing for me is to keep eating clean and providing my body with the nutrients it needs to heal well. 14 days and counting!

VS Very Sexy... Not so much!

Ha! This is me wearing the Very Sexy Push Up bra. This is as good as it gets, pre-BA. So glad I've made this decision, because clothes shopping was getting depressing. The dress is from LOFT and is an XS... I do like it and hope I can wear it after (maybe even without a bra!) Surgery is one week from tomorrow!

My husband is being incredibly supportive throughout the whole process. He did tell one of his friends about the surgery, which I was kind of weirded out by... But came to understand that he needed someone to talk to. No biggie, I guess. Except we're going out with this couple tonight and I'm convinced the guy's going to be sneaking glances at my boobs all night. Haha. What did you all tell your friends? It's not that I want to keep it a secret, but I don't picture myself having a coming out party for the new girls.

Preparations are continuing... Taking my vitamins day and night and I think I have everything else lined up and ready to go. I might pick up a few camis or bralettes to wear post-surgery. I've ready about the coobie... Any other suggestions?

T-minute one week... Let's do a little shopping!

Hard to believe that my surgery date is one week from today. By this time next week, I'll be passed out in the recliner sleeping off the anesthesia and rocking some (hopefully) 34Ds. :) I stopped at Walmart today to pick up a few bras and tanks to wear post-op. In reading some other reviews it seems like some surgeons prefer you not wear a bra for a while, so I thought the camis might work well if that's the case.

I took pictures in each of them which will be fun to compare post-op. I wasn't sure what sizes to get. I wear an extra-small or small now, so I got an assortment of medium and large based on how they looked. The pictures have the prices listed too - pretty reasonable, I think!

Last appointment... More confused than ever!

Eeek, ladies... I'm so confused! I brought this wish pic to my surgeon today and we both agreed that she looked like a small D (which is exactly what I'm hoping for and I like this natural look). I told him I didn't want to regret going too small, but that since I'm quite active, I didn't want them too big either. Then he says, "We can achieve this look. I'll have a range of sizes from 200-350 in the OR and we'll see what works best for that." Whhaaatt?? I feel like I'm starting with nothing and those numbers are so small! I even said, "Those numbers seem really low. Are you sure that will get me to look like that?" And he said yes... It just seems to go against everything I've seen on here, but I have to ultimately trust him. He is extremely skilled and this is his specialty, but there is no way I'm having another surgery to go bigger. I understand that complications could arise, but I'd rather this be the one surgery to get the size right. Soooo... I am fretting. I know I'm going to be lying on the table saying, "Small D, doc. Don't forget!" ;) This is such a first world problem, but it's over seven grand and I don't want to mess around. Ahhhh... I need a drink (but of course, no alcohol for two weeks before surgery!) ;) And in other fun news, I'm totally PMSing and my period should start just before surgery. Lovely!

Just two sleeps left...

and let's be honest - I'm not sure how much sleeping I'll do tomorrow night. Surgery is scheduled for 8 AM on Friday and we have to be there at 7 (it's about a half an hour away). My parents came to pick up my son so I could have some time today and all day tomorrow for final preparations. Here's what I accomplished today:
-finished all the laundry; I'll do one more load tomorrow of sheets and towels
-got a mani/pedi (clear on my fingers so the nurses can monitor me if needed)
-moved a recliner into the TV room to set up my recovery station (supplies include lip balm, water and straws, remote, chargers for iPad and phone, body spray, dry shampoo, sheets, blankets, and pillows - what am I missing??)
-ordered bagels and spreads to bring to the surgical center for the nurses (They deserve a little treat for having to wake up so early just because I want bigger boobs. Haha.)
-paid all bills that will be coming due over the new two weeks
-set out all my button down loungewear

Tomorrow's to-do list:
-grocery shop for fresh fruit and make ahead some meals and snacks (salads with hard boiled eggs, edamame, or fish, celery and almond butter, Greek yogurt parfaits, baked sweet potatoes and quinoa with veggies - any other good ideas? How long before I can cook?)
-car wash
-pick up prescription (only thing that will be ready is the anti-nausea meds to take at bedtime - can't pick up the rest ahead of time so we'll have to stop on the way home)
-house is getting cleaned
-getting a massage and a haircut so I can relax!

That's about it! I'm getting so incredibly excited for this and I'm so thankful for the women who have shared their stories so I could become so much more informed about this process. My last update was a bit frantic, but I'm in a good place now. :) When I spoke with the nurse yesterday to confirm everything she ended with, "Don't worry about a thing. You are in excellent hands." Can't ask for more than that!

A Poem for My Fellow Real Selfies

'Twas the night before surgery and in my clean home
I have set up a recovery station, with the charger for my iPhone
My meals are all prepped and the pantry is full
Netflix is queued so my days won't be dull
The padded bras have been washed and set aside to donate
Two alarms have been set - I don't want to be late!
By tomorrow at ten my chest will be tight
Bigger boobies to all, and to all a good night!

Thanks to everyone for your well-wishes and advice. See you on the flip side!

They're heeerrrreeeee!!!

Hi ladies! I'm very pleased to announce the arrival of my new twin girls! ;) Aren't they precious! Haha. The nurse called my dressings a sexy little black dress. :) I have to keep all of this on until Tuesday. I'm allowed to bathe waist down and can shower after Tuesday's appointment. My surgeon told my husband but he doesn't remember the ccs. D'oh!! He did ask him if he was able to achieve the look I wanted and he said yes.

I arrived at 7, filled in paperwork and got changed into a gown. I had to take off my pants but could keep my underwear on. They gave me some socks too. A nurse led me to pre-op, started my IV and asked a bunch of medical history questions. My PS came in to mark me up and the anesthesiologist came in to chat about what he was going to do. No nerves at all, which surprised me. I think my husband was nervous enough for the both of us!

A nurse and I walked over to the OR and I climbed on the table. They were a well-oiled machine in there! Woke up in recovery at 10:30 and was hurting so they gave me an Oxy. Husband was also able to fill scrips there so we didn't have to stop. Yippee!

Car ride home was brief, thankfully. Lots of pressure and it felt like he was driving so fast (but was actually going a bit slower). Got home at 11:30, climbed in the recliner, took a Valium, and slept. Woke around 3 and took Oxy, Arnica, and recovery vitamins. Ate a homemade protein bar.

I'm feeling pretty good so far. Pain is a 3ish. I have a smoothie defrosting and ready to go for my next "meal". I'm not very hungry, which is weird for me! Trying to stay hydrated with water too.

I am so happy I did this. The discomfort will eventually subside and I'll be able to wear tops that fit! Oh, last night I measured myself (even though you should really have someone else do it) and I was a 32A (more a AA on my right). My nursing bras were 36E. Comical! When all is said and done I'll be pleased with a 32D/34C. Time will tell!

Day 1 post-op

I slept in the recliner last night which I think is helping with swelling. Even though I'm all bandaged up, I don't really see any swelling up near my collarbone. I woke once around 2:30 and took an Oxy but have only taken the Valium and Tylenol today. The pain is a super tightness and the muscle relaxers help me breathe a little more deeply. I'd say I'm at a pain level of 3, so not too bad for just after 24 hours post-op. I'm still all wrapped up so I can't see them, but I'm hoping they are snug and cozy and settling into their new home. My husband and I may try a short walk either tonight or tomorrow. Every hour or so I get up and walk around the house for a bit. I made some eggs this morning without too much difficulty and ate one of my prepared salads for lunch. My appetite is back! I've been drinking lots of water and went to the bathroom - yay for no constipation! ;) I'm still pretty tired and doze off here and there throughout the day. I'm hoping to be able to sleep tonight without the major meds. Hope everyone is doing well!

Day 3 reveal

I caved and unwrapped myself. I couldn't take the suspense any longer! They are looking good! Quite swollen and it was too painful to take a profile pic. But it's crazy to actually see breasts when there were none there before. Sleeping upright last night was rough so I'm going to try reclining a little more tonight. Also, for all my worry about size, there's no way I would have wanted larger implants. I stopped my pain meds yesterday and have been sticking to Tylenol, but holy hell, this hurts! My PS measured well because my itty bitty chest couldn't have handled anything bigger. First appointment is on Tuesday so we'll see what the doc has to say.

Feeling better and on my own today

My husband went back to work (boo!) but I'm feeling pretty good today. Last night I took some Tylenol before bed around 9 and made it to 2 AM before I woke up to change position. I went downstairs to the couch and fell asleep again until 6 without any additional medicine. Feeling pretty well rested! I also took off my wrap for a quick shower (PS said to keep my back to the water). I'm looking forward to being able to wash and dry my hair again. :) Also, putting that wrap back on by myself was a new form of torture - yikes! I'm hoping I get to retire this thing after tomorrow's appointment.

I tried on one of my bandinis but the straps were too difficult to maneuver just yet. I already love that I'm going to be able to wear strapless tops! The implants have certainly not dropped yet but i think when they do everything will be nice and even. You can see my natural breast tissue at the bottom of my left breast which just makes me laugh when I think about how that was all I had there. I also think I'm going to be able to achieve some good cleavage now.

I'm still unsure about the ccs, but I'd say I probably got between 325 and 375, with 25ccs more going into the right side. Looking forward to hearing what the PS has to say tomorrow. I figure they'll change a lot over the next few months, but this size feels good for my body and level of activity. Already today when putting on deodorant I was bumping into them. Haha... They'll take some getting used to.

I hope everyone is either healing well or getting ready for their big day. Even though I'm only a few days post-op, and recovery isn't exactly easy, I'm very happy I did this!

First post-op appointment

It was a success! I drove there myself and PS took off that horribly tight black bandage which made it very difficult to breathe. Instead I got the infamous strap and a very sexy bra (haha). But honestly the strap doesn't bother me that much. They said to wear it as tight or as loose as feels comfortable until my next appointment in two weeks and that I can take it off for a while if it starts to bother me. I already put two nursing pads under my armpits so the strap doesn't rub my skin and it's working perfectly. I used organic cotton washable pads when nursing and they are so soft and comfy! Glad I saved them. :) I can wear any sports bras, though she recommended front close until I am more comfortable maneuvering my arms above my head. The incisions look good... Minimal bruising and they don't hurt at all. They are covered in dermabond and I can shower normally and won't need to get any stitches removed. Oh, and to answer the big cc question - 350 right and 325 left. That's what I figured, and again, I cringe thinking about anything bigger in my body. :) I feel great about the size and over the next few months as they drop I think I'm going to love them more and more. PS said I can walk as much as I'd like, but should limit any excessive arm movements for the next couple of weeks. I guess my husband has to handle the dishes for a while... ;) Even better news is that I can sleep flat again. As a back sleeper I'm so happy!! Sitting upright to sleep was killing my tailbone. Feeling really good after this appointment and hoping the healing continues to go well for me and all my other gals here! :)

Day 5

I had lunch out with a friend today which was awesome. Great to get out of the house, but we were laughing so much I was starting to hurt! :) I didn't tell her about my surgery because I'm keeping it pretty private and I wore something that I thought completely concealed the implants. I am loving this size because I can so easily hide them (I work in a very conservative profession) but when I'm with my husband or at the beach they fill out my tops the way I want them to.

My incisions are feeling a little irritated with the bra and strap (especially the right side) but nothing I can't handle just yet. I've been using coconut oil as a moisturizer over my breasts which helps the dry/stretched out feeling they get, especially when I come out of the shower. I remember them feeling the same way when my milk came in and they seemed to triple in size overnight! This time I had to pay for that to happen! (Though I could argue that the surgery costs way less than having another child.) ;)

I attached a few photos illustrating how I can easily downplay the girls and how they fill out my bikini so much better.

Reality Check

So I don't think this constitutes as "boobie blues" but I had to give myself a little pep talk today. On my daily walk (probably went about 2 1/2 miles) I was just starting in the crosswalk when it starting to flash to stop. I should have turned around, but stupidly decided to "jog" across to the other side. It was barely a jog, but it really hurt. It was at the end of my walk and I was already tired and a little sore. Remember when I said the strap didn't bother me on Tuesday? Well, it bothers me now! ;) As I'm finishing the walk, I start having a little pity party for myself. It didn't help that I walked past CrossFit and saw everyone working out. But then I stop and think. Six days ago I had some pretty major surgery. I am not cleared to workout out for another five weeks. Why am I getting upset that after six days I'm not feeling 100% normal? Of course it hurts... and it's unfair to myself to expect anything different than my current results. I'm actually having a great recovery and I'm very happy with my results, so I'm going to remain patient, keep walking, and stay positive. But I still hate the strap. ;)

One Week!

Just last Friday I was sitting in this chair all doped up and bandaged up... And tonight it's my first date night post-surgery! I'm feeling really great for Day 7 and I'm starting to relearn how to dress. It's still easy to keep 'em classy, but certain tops showcase them well. Morning boob sucks big time, but only lasts about a minute or two. I wake up in the middle of the night once or twice because I can't readjust my sleeping position but that shouldn't last too much longer. I'm really eager for the girls to soften up a bit. They are still very firm and tight. I'll ask my PS about those displacement exercises (I've read such contradictory opinions on them!) Range of motion is much better too. I can lift my arms over my head much more easily, but I'm still trying to take it easy and let everything heal.

10 Days

Sleep has been my biggest struggle since surgery. I was in the recliner for a while, but that hurt my lower back. Laying flat gave me "morning boob" almost instantly. But I finally slept the whole night in bed last night with minimal discomfort. My back still hurts a little, but it's definitely feeling better. I feel like once I got past that one week mark I've started feeling really great overall. I can shower and get ready easily, daily chores aren't a struggle, and I'm not exhausted by the end of the night. I think no working out was a big adjustment for me; it's been hard to go from six days a week of intense workouts to daily walks. :) Hopefully at my appointment on the 27th I'll get clearance to start doing a little more.

My PS called to check in with me on Friday afternoon (very thoughtful) and we talked about displacement exercises. I started them this weekend and they've made a big difference. I feel the implant softening up and my range of motion have improved greatly. My husband even helped with them last night. ;)

As far as bras go, I've been loving my Walmart specials. ;) The Hanes bandini is what's pictured here and I also like their No Boundaries seamless bras (Coobie knock-offs). Can't beat the price and they're very comfortable. I'm still wearing my strap as much as possible and I think they are dropping pretty evenly and well for only ten days post-op.

Beach Day?

So with summer's end just around the corner, I wanted to take my little guy to the beach tomorrow. Does anyone know if this is allowed? I have a one-piece suit I can wear that will cover my incisions completely and I always use sunscreen, but what about sand or swimming? I can call my PS in the morning to ask. Just thought I'd throw it out there...

Spent the past two days at school setting up my room and no comments on the new girls, which is great! My use of padded bras was effective. ;) I also cut and colored my hair (about six inches off and went from brown to dirty blond) this summer so most people are noticing that instead. Haha.

Feeling great for day 12. Next appointment is one week from today and I have my list of questions ready (scar gel or strips, exercise, bras, vitamins). Can't wait to see what he thinks - I think they're doing really well!

Two weeks!

Feeling great for 14 days post-op! The implants are getting softer, but still have a ways to go to achieve the natural look I'm hoping for. I'm wearing my strap faithfully and doing a set of displacement exercises about every two hours. I didn't end up going to the beach yesterday because I didn't want to risk hurting anything. I'm still not lifting my three-year-old or anything else too heavy, but I can pretty much do anything else around the house. Hoping to get clearance to start some cardio at Wednesday's appointment. Some of the dermabond on my left breast is starting to come off and the scar beneath looks to be healing really well. They seem to be right in the crease too! As far as size goes, I'm measuring between a 34 C and D (measuring myself) and I'm hoping that's right where I stay.

Three Week Post-Op Appointment

Awesome day today! Met with my PS this morning. Everything is healing really well. He checked my incisions and removed a little stitch on each one (ouch!) They are looking good and most of the dermabond is off. I got the go-ahead for silicone strips and he wants me to massage them with Neosporin or scar gel five times a day. I get to ditch the strap (yahoo!) and should continue massaging downward several times a day. I also got clearance for lower body workouts and can resume all normal workouts in two more weeks! Continue with sports bras for two more weeks and I can swim in two more weeks... everything else is back to normal. I can pick up my son, have a drink, take my normal vitamins and supps, and sleep however I want. Glorious!

People should tell you to add another several hundred dollars to the cost of surgery for all the shopping you want to do afterward! Over the past few days I've been having a blast buying some new clothes and bras. I wanted to invest in a couple of serious sports bras for when I start running again. I also opted to try a few wireless bra options for when I can start wearing them in two weeks. Every store measured me at a 34 band, but some 36s felt more comfortable - I hate when they feel tight and my ribcage is giant. The bras I bought were 34D, 36C, and 36D - so be sure to try everything on since manufacturers run so differently (just like I can wear a size 2, 4, or 6, depending on the store). I went to a specialty lingerie store in town, Soma Intimates, and Victoria's Secret. I ended up buying a few things, but my favorite were the Embraceable Wireless at Soma. So comfy and a lot cuter than some of the grandma bras that tend to show up in wireless D cups. I also got a few pieces of lingerie for my husband and totally stepped out of my comfort zone. I didn't post any pictures of the more risque pieces, but having breasts certainly made me a feel a lot sexier and a lot more confident in trying something new. Also, general clothes shopping is SO FUN! I used to shop once or twice a year because I really didn't enjoy it, but I've been to the mall the past three days and have had to pledge to myself to stop now. Clothes fit sooo much better when you have a chest!

My next appointment is in a month... until then, I probably won't be updating all that much, but feel free to comment or PM me if you have any questions. I can't thank everyone on this site enough for all the info and support over the past couple of months. Lots of love and continued healing for everyone!

Four Weeks!

Hard to believe it's been close to a month already. I'm feeling really great and I'm sooooo looking forward to working out again next week. I have my first training session on Thursday. Yahoo! I have my super supportive sports bra ready to go! ;)

Here are a few pictures. I think all swelling has gone down but I still want them to drop more into a more natural slope (since I'm only a month out, I'm hoping they'll still change some). The size is great. Sometimes I think they're huge (like when I'm walking on the treadmill and can't imagine running with these things on my chest!), sometimes I think they're small (in certain tops they disappear), but most of the time they're just right for me. I love my cleavage (except on hot days - boob sweat is a new thing for me!) The incisions have also gotten a lot flatter since I've been wearing the silicone strips. I still had one little piece of stitch that finally fell out/dissolved today so that little red spot should start healing. I'm continuing to massage the incisions and and implants a few times a day. Hope everyone is doing well!
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