Full TT - Maryland

Hi all, I'm new to realself, although I have...

Hi all, I'm new to realself, although I have been on this website countless of times. I am a proud mommy of three beautiful kids and have a wonderful husband.

I had a surgery date of March 29,2011. I let my anxiety get the best of me. Once I recieved the "packet" and read the risks, I cancelled. I regret not doing it, I am dealing with depression and sometimes feel like I'm not being the best wife and Mom I know I am because I'm not happy. I feel so selfish, oh boy, here comes the tears. I live day by day, some days are better than others.

I started working out after my consultation, and have lost 15 lbs. I feel good about that, but have the hardest time looking at myself without clothes. I have tried creams, cover-up make-up, was willing to try sunless tanning, heard that's suppose to help with covering the stretch marks. I have looked into fraxel laser and titan to tighten the skin, for the money I would spend, they said I would not be happy. I looked into doing a mini tummy tuck, just so I could be awake, I have such a hard time not being in control. Again was told I would not be happy with the results. I don't want to teach my kids especially my daughter that this is the only way I will be happy. I am very grateful for my husband and children and they help me in more ways to be happy than they know. I just hope and pray that I will have the courage to go through with it, I can't even imagine what would happen if anything goes wrong.

Sorry for such a long post, I just have been obsessing over this for so long, and I'm afraid I'll schedule the procedure and back out again, please help.

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Comments (9)

My TT went great! Just dealing with the swell hell 6 weeks out. By the way, my Dr was in a hospital OR, with an anesthesilogist and an over night stay. Would not have done is any other way.
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I will definitely keep everyone updated. I read the not worth it reviews and man did that make me rethink everything again. But then I received your post Kimmers and it made me really excited again and your right we will ALL survive:-)
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It is good to educate yourself on the risks but really focus on all the positive. 

Your doctor would not do these procedures on you if you were not in good health.   Keep your chin up:)

To be honest I worried more about driving to work on the freeway than I did going in for this surgery.  Have you seen all the crazy drivers out there.!!!

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Every feeling you are going through has been experienced by every woman who ever had this done.  The fear and guilt unfortunately all come with it.  It will pass...

I assure you that your are worth it and should do it if that is what you want.  There is nothing wrong with wanting to improve your body.  You will feel wonderful after and be glad that you did it.  It's all ok:)

The ladies on the site will support you and help you through this.

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Thanks Kimmers!
I have read your story, what an inspiration
you are:-) Thanks for taking the time to set this up. I know what I'm feeling has been felt by many others and I am grateful of all the support shown here:-) I have most of my family supportive, but the one who has made me hesitate the most is my Mom. She doesn't think I need it and has warned me about the dangers and has reminded me that I have children that need me. Of course I know that and I wish she just understood why I'm doing this. But I guess what kind of mother would she be if she didn't worry. Thanks again for listening and the support:-) I know that if and when I decide everything will work out. Only positive thinking:-) It does make it harder when you have people telling you, you look great for having three children, and what I see is not what they see:-( Especially my husband, I don't want to be too insecure because he loves me just the way I am and understands that my body has changed since giving birth. God Bless him:-) We have talked about something going wrong, from regreting doing it, to having to do a revision to even death, as much as I don't lime talking about it, and that makes him not want me to do it even more. But on the flipside, wants me to be happy. What to do? I am very involved with my kids school, sports and social life, I don't want to miss out or have my husband bear all that responsibility, I forgot to mention we have four dogs! Anyways just thought I share how I felt. Thanks again for listening:-)
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Oh yes our moms worry about us:)   That is a mothers job and that will never change.  My mom was the one I was most worried about telling and she was wonderful about it.  She told me that she wanted me to be happy and to love myself so go for it! 

The entire process is a hard decision but you will know if and when it is right for you.   This is about you and loving your body so just hang on and it will all work out.

Please do keep us up to date on what you decide. 

You will have some down time but it will all be temporary and the family will survive...dogs and all:)   You will have time later to get the house back in order and everything flowing again soon enough. 

When I was a week post op I actually went to my sons Rugby game.  His girlfriend drove me there and I sat is a chair with my drains hidden and it worked.  I was wiped out when I got home but it was worth it. 

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I am online now, need to stop looking but can't. I went back to one of the original doctor's I had in mind, after reading a few reviews of the PS I went to see today, was a little dissapointed with reading two of them. I saw some before and after and noticed that some of the scars are higher than I would like, but the original PS, VERY low, which I want. The thing is he doesn't use a hospital but his accredited facility and uses a CRNA and not an anesthesiologist, should I be concerned? I've read both positive and negative about both. I really do like my original PS and now I'm thinking I should go with him? He has great reviews. How do you find the one? Does anyone else have or has had the same concern?
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I honestly must say had I done too much research I too would have probably backed out. It is what it is.... a major, cosmetic surgery. Nothing over the counter will ever work and luckily you have had people be honest about what will work versus just taking your money. I have 3 daughters 26, 24 and 22 and in no way do I feel like this is sending a negative message to them. It might be best to be that great mom/wife you know you are and carry your positive energy with you and should you decide to go forward again with it, your head will be in the right place. How old are your children? The reason I ask is because I admire ANYONE who has a TT with children still in the house that need care. I am 48, married, stay at home, hubby works and I needed complete silence to heal, lol. Good luck, I think your "gut" feeling would be your best compass with the final decision.
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Hi Lexigirl!
Thanks for your post and positive feedback. My kids are 11,8 and 4.
They have different reactions to me doing it, but all want me to be happy. I went to another PS today, and I believe I found the one:-) He was so compassionate, and did not rush me into scheduling the surgery. He also does not charge a hefty fee for scheduling. He was VERY informative and did not leave nothing out. He explained how he did things a little differently and a lot of what he does made me so less worried, because I read all about those who are not happy, from the lipo and the scar(being too high)to the bulge above the pubic area. He only does it at a hospital and offers overnight stay, which I think will be very helpful. I really do want this and feel I am ready, but I'm still very anxious. Thanks again for responding. By the way, how was your tummy tuck experience?
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