I am 25 years old and I am the proud mother of a 5...
I am 25 years old and I am the proud mother of a 5 year old little girl. I recently got married to a wonderful man who is making my dream of having this procedure come true. I have always been a curvy girl but it was a good "curvy". However, I have always had a tendency to gain weight. I am 5'4 and when I was in high school I was around 165 but when I graduated I was 145 with a 36D. I got pregnant at 19 and at the end of my pregnancy I was 180. I got down to 165 shortly after my daughter was born. However, when my daughter was about 6 months old I slipped on some ice and broke my sacrum and my coccyx which is basically my back. I was pretty much bedridden and wasn't able to cook for myself so I had to rely on the kindness of others and lots of fast food. Within a year I was 220 and was coming out of a 38DD although I suspect that I was much larger. It took me several years to lose it. I guess I started losing about a year and a half ago. I have actually lost 30lbs since this March. I am now down to 165 and I honestly don't know what cup size I am. I refuse to buy new bras before my reduction so I am still wearing a 38DD but they are way too big for me. I suspect I am maybe a 34DD-36D. Not sure. I know that sounds crazy but my eyes are on the prize. So, obviously I have severe back, neck, and shoulder pain as well as headaches due to my breasts. My breast reduction is covered by insurance. It is great that I am getting help with this part.
So, here's where I stand now. I have the notorious "flap" hanging down on my abdomen. I am really good at hiding it, so much so that when I show someone they are shocked. I had a c section with my daughter so my abdominal muscles are completely ruined. My breasts are asymmetrical and hang down. I swear, they used to be amazing. Most girls would kill to have breast like mine used to be and now they are embarrassing. I feel like I look so much better in clothes since I've lost weight but now when I take them off it's even worse. My skin is loose and sagging. I used to hate my body and feel disgusted but I have been working hard to learn to love myself. I actually feel pretty confident and I feel good about myself. That's how I know its time. I want this for me, no one else. I've worked hard and its time for me to take the next step and realize my dream.
I am so very excited and scared all at once. I know I am going to be in terrible pain but my biggest fear is hating my body. I am so scared that maybe my expectations for my TT aren't realistic but I see so many amazing before and after pics. I look at myself and think that surely I can look great too. Its not that I really have outlandish expectations, its just that I don't want to be disappointed. I am really scared about my breasts too. They have always been my trademark, you know? I mean, not that I was showing them off but they made me feel like a woman. I don't know if they will be too small or deflated or maybe lopsided lol it really is scary!
I am joining this community because I am so impressed with all of you. I have never seen so much love and support for strangers. I can't imagine doing this without you. I have already learned so much! I would greatly appreciate any advice, encouragement, or tips on how to prepare for this procedure and survive it! You guys are amazing! I can't wait to be as beautiful on the outside as I feel on the inside!
*The cost of $7,100 is only for the TT and included Lipo. The Breast Reduction was covered by my insurance and I have no idea how much it is.
ok here are my before pics...
I don't know how good these are but I will post the one's from my doctor when I get them. I kind of hate these pics but they represent the hard work of carrying my daughter and struggling to lose weight. Besides, I will have the body I want soon enough!
One Month Until my New Body!!
I am a complete mess right now! Im just one big ball of emotions and I think about this surgery all of the time. I know its a whole month away but I feel like I have so much to do to prepare. I've been waiting for this for so long it almost doesn't seem real.
I swear, the closer it gets the more questions I find that I have for my PS. I have a list and I'm going to take it to my preop appt on September 10th. I feel like my nerves are getting to me a little. I'm really hoping that I get amazing results like so many of the great women I've seen on here. I second guess myself sometimes because I wish I had lost 15 or 20 more pounds. I have already lost 60 pounds though and I'm really happy about that. My PS is going to be happy too bc I've lost 35 lbs since my consult! I'm happy with my weight. Im within 15 to 20 lbs of my ideal weight. I know I'm stressing over nothing. I think its just that this procedure is such a big deal. I have dreamed about it for so long.
Im trying to figure out what the most important things are for me to go on and buy. I know I need wedges for my bed but how tall should I get them? Also what about the ones that go under your knees? Then I was also thinking about getting some vitamins and arnica. Any tips on CGs? Should I go on and get silicone sheets or wait until I am post op to worry about that. So, what am I forgetting?
Any tips, to do lists, or must haves that I need to know? Thanks so much everyone! You are all amazing! :)
Honestly I'm scared to lose my curves...
Ok so I know I need a major overhaul but I sometimes see pics of girls who end up with that tree trunk look. Its so incredibly important to me to keep an hourglass/ spoon figure. I am terrified of not having that shape? Looking at my pics do you guys think I will end up with curves still? Its a long shot but these pics are kind of an inspiration for what I want to look like someday. I probably sound crazy but they remind me of how my body looked before only with a more exaggerated curve. I just love that feminine look of a tiny waist and large round hips. Is this crazy or is it something I might be able to achieve? I am definitely considering a bbl in the future so I want to be sure to keep my curves in the meantime. I know its silly but I made edited pics to illustrate to my PS what I want vs what I definitely don't want. They are just quick examples and poor quality but I just wanted to see it for myself too. Let me know what you think. Is the one I made showing me thinner but with curves a realistic goal for this procedure? Keep in mind I had no way to edit out the area that needs to be "tucked" this is strictly for the shape of my figure. Should I take these to my preoperative appt? Thanks guys! :)
So my surgery is booked for 8am on October 1st!
My mother in law is a nurse at my PS' office and she told me I'm officially booked for 8am on Tuesday, October 1st. I have to be there at 6am. I'm going to be at my mom's house at 5am so we can leave from there. I am my surgeon's only case that day so I'm happy about that. She said I'm down for 6.5 hours but she would be shocked if they got done that quickly.
I'm having a breast reduction, full tummy tuck, and liposuction of my arms, flanks/hips, and inner thighs. I've heard people say not to get everything at once bc the PS might have to rush to get it done and the results wouldn't be as good but she assured me that Dr. Clark will take as long as she needs to ensure I have the best possible results.
I'm guessing that I'm going to be a hot mess after having all of that done at the same time. I'm still super excited though. I really hope that my results are awesome lol
Oh I started vitamins today and I am hoping that I'll heal faster and with less complications if I take vitamins. I'm also in the process of getting everything I need for my surgery. I need some wedge pillows. Anyone know where to find these for a good deal?
What did you wear on your surgery day?
During your recovery were you able to wear sweat pants/soffe shorts? Any tips for staying comfortable? Thanks!
8 days until surgery!!
I feel like I've been so busy the last couple of weeks getting ready and I can't believe it's only 8 days away! I had a great preop appt and my ps really made me feel at ease. Of course I had a million and one questions for her but she took her time and answered every one of them. She also took notes about how I want to look, like specifically that I want and hourglass shape and where I felt my problem areas are. She said that she would be sure to be careful about my hip area to avoid taking too much which could leave me without the hourglass shape. I honestly don't know how to feel about that now. I mean, that's what I want but now I am really worried that I will regret not having her take so much. I don't like the area where my hips buldge out farther than my thighs and it worries me that it won't be smoothe. I know I'm probably being really paranoid but I just don't want to make the wrong decisions on something so important. I know I will probably have to have some touch up with the lipo. Right now I am having my arms, inner thighs, flanks, and mons pubis. This will be in addition to my tummy tuck and breast reduction. My surgery is supposed to last about 7 hours which is a really long time to be under. This does worry me a little. I feel guilty sometimes because I have a little girl, a husband, and 4 puppies that need me at home and I know its a big risk but I have wanted this for so long. I know I am going to go through with this surgery but I am definitely going to be praying that everything goes ok. I just love my family so much and it means so much to me that they are 100% supportive in my decision to do this.
On a lighter note my mom is going to stay the night with me in the hospital since I have to stay overnight. I am having my step mom stay with me for 3 days after that at home. Then it will be the weekend and my husband will be off work so he will be able to take care of me. I think that should be enough help but if I need help still on monday when he goes back to work, I think I can find someone to come stay. My little girl will be out of school on fall break so we are going to rent a bunch of movies and be lazy all week. I am getting her a bunch of books, games, activities, and crafts/projects for the week so she can keep herself busy. She is seriously one of the most well behaved, low maintence kids you'll ever meet. I am really looking forward to spending extra time with her even though I know I'm going to feel pretty rough still.
I feel like I'm nesting. Its like I can't rest until every inch of the house is spotless and everything is in its place. I am really enjoying cleaning and preparing for my surgery. I'm just so excited and I have so much nervous energy that I have to find some way to get it all out lol... I am currently on my second to last day of work before my surgery. Friday will be my last night if I don't get called off. Then that weekend before my surgery is going to be my date night with my husband. I'm really looking forward to it and I know it will be special since we won't have much "alone" time for awhile. LOL
Monday is my preop testing, which for some reason I'm nervous about. Its like the only thing that is standing in my way and I just keep thinking that it's too good to be true. I know, I'm crazy lol
Well ladies, I'm going to get back to work but I'll write again soon! Please let me know any other must haves for surgery! Thanks!!
Only 5 days until I join the flat side! I'm working hard to get everything done and I keep going back and forth between wishing I had more time and wishing it was here already! Lol
I didn't sleep well at all last night. I guess I'm nervous and excited all at once! I have my pre admission testing this morning at 10 am and I'm praying all my tests look good. There's no reason to think they won't but I'm just ready to get this done and those tests are the last thing standing in my way lol I couldn't believe I was having them the day before surgery! Lol Well I'm going to try to get another hour or so of sleep so that I can get the million and one things done tomorrow that I have to do! Maybe my nerves will calm down! :)
*correction: I have a million and one things to get done TODAY, not tomorrow! I doubt I'll be doing anything but recovering tomorrow! I need sleep! Lol
TODAY is the day!!
1 Oct 2013
Day of treatment
Getting ready to go to the hospital in about 30 min. I'm super excited and a little nervous. I know I'll be more nervous when we get there! Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers today! Have a great day, ladies! :)
Today I joined the flat side!!!!
1 Oct 2013
Day of treatment
It's been a long, painful day but I think it's going to be totally worth it! I haven't got to see the results without my CGs. I ended up having lipo on my arms, inner thighs, under arm areas, and sides/flanks. I also had my breasts reduced and drastically lifted and tummy tucked (obviously). I was in surgery for 7 hrs. I had a catheter in but it wasn't working properly so w we went on and removed it and I feel so much better now. I've been up a few times.
I love catching a glimpse of myself the mirror! I am just so impressed with the work my PS did. I look so small now! I'm extremely swollen so right now and I can't imagine being any smaller! I love it!!! Thanks for all of your thoughts and prayers today! God is so good and I'm feeling very blessed!
not going to lie....
I feel pretty horrible lol I am in so much pain right now and I know I'm doing well but I can't wait to feel better. I am hurting from my elbows to my knees lol
looking good, feeling a little better!
I just can't describe how thrilled I am with my results so far! I love my little perky breasts and how thin I am! I'm scared I'm going to want bigger breasts than what I have now bc I don't think they have ever been this small but they are so pretty! My husband loves them! I have caught him staring at me when hes helping me and he has the biggest grin on his face. He says he can't believe how good I look and how small I am. Its definitely one of the best feelings in the world.
Last night his mom who is a nurse for a plastic surgeon came over and changed my dressings. Then they brought one of our recliners up stairs and its so much easier than the bed! I had the wedges but it was hard to get comfortable with them. And getting in and out of bed was horrible. Also I usually pee every 1 to 2 hrs so I've been up and down a lot lol... I am using a walker to get around and its so helpful. My lower back is already killing me but my husband rubs it for me several times a day which really helps!
I'm moving around a lot better today but I'm still in a lot of pain. Hopefully every day gets better!
you ladies are just great!
Going through this process is every bit as emotional as it is is physical. Having so many people tell me I look great and lending their support makes this experience so so much more gratifying. Also all of your advice and wisdom is so helpful!
I'm pretty sure the numbing shot mmy PS gave me has completely wore off at this point so I'm still in a lot of pain but it's manageable and I'm getting around around pretty good with my walker! Lol
My snuggle bunnies...
Nothing makes you you feel better than a pug mug... except maybe two pug mugs!
just a couple more! lol
These are my loves... I feel like I should share some of my life with you guys :)
My loves and my life
Honestly I'm having so much fun showing you guys my favorite pics, I I think I'll share some more! These pics really do tell so much abouy about my life! In the last two years we have accomplished so much! My My husband and I are both young but we have come so far from where we started. When we met I was unemployed and he was making $7.50 an hour. Now I am an RN in the ICU and he is an Industrial Engineer and has an amazing job. We have both supported each other and now we are reaching our dreams. We have purchased our first home, my husband bought me my very first new car, and of course I have had this procedure. My husband is also saving up for his dream car. Material things dont mean much in life without a happy home but reaching our goals has been such a blessing and we owe owe every bit to God. Our daughter just recently started Kindergarten too! We have four dogs: Bella (pug mix), Beau (pug), Blue (bully), and Harley (min pin mix). These are my loves and I truly am happy. Sometimes its good to remind yourself just how lucky you are! Hope you guys enjoy!
ok so a little about my struggle with weight
I don't have any pics right now of me me at my heaviest but I found a couple that show show that I was much bugher than I am now. They don't quite do it justice but its hard to keep pics like that.
Post op appt tomorrow afternoon!
I'm pretty excited to go to my post op appointment tomorrow! I'm going to have my mom take a bunch of pics! Hopefully I will be able to post more pics tomorrow night. I'm super swollen right now which is bothersome but expected. I'm so thankful that we took pics soon after my surgery bc otherwise its hard to tell swelling from fat. My hips are very swollen and if I didn't have those first pics to to look back at, I would be worried that she didn't take as much off as I wanted. Its just so cool to look at those pics and know that I will be even smaller than I was there!
On a side note I had talked about the fact that I told my PS to go easy on my hips during my pre op appt. Well, the more I thought about it the more I started to second guess that decision. I decided to talk to her about my concerns when she marked me for surgery. I told her that I I wanted her to take as much as she could and I am so very glad I did that! I love how small I am. I am just beside myself! If you're considering having this done, I say go for it! It's just been such a blessing so far and I am no where near my final results! :)
Had a great post op appt today!
I can't believe how good my incisions look. You guys aren't going to believe how perfect my tt scar is. It is so pristine and is perfectly placed! The only thing that shows that I'm only a week post op is my crazy swelling! Its driving me crazy! Either way I'm still smaller than I was. I'll do my best to be patient seeing as how I don't have a choice! Lol
I just love it! I just can't get over it!
I have great news too... I was able to have 3 of the 4 drains removed!!! That means I get to shower tonight! Yay!! I'm going to feel like a new woman!
I'm so swollen but when I get discouraged Iook back at the previous pics and how small I am there. I know it's just fluid but I'm ready to be rid of it. But still, I'm so happy with results so far!
new pics from right before my first post op shower!
As you can tell from the pics my boobies are somewhat oddly shaped but its just because of the swelling that has become my life lol
My first real taste of swell hell...
I took a shower tonight and I feel horrible now! I am so so swollen and uncomfortable it's crazy! I've got to take it easy. I could feel my abdomen swelling up as I was getting out of the shower and you could see it getting bigger within a few minutes. Also the sides of my breasts under my arms are so swollen. I really hope I dont end up needing the dog ear revision for that area but it's way too soon to tell. Even still, I love my new body. I just have to give it the time it needs to heal. Its hard to sit still but I am just going to have to deal with it. My step mom who is here helping me tonight is washing my CG so I'm taking a small break until its clean which is probably a good thing. I love my CG but I've got to go without until its clean lol.... hopefully a good night's rest will help!
Today has definitely been better!
My grandparents came by to see me today and it was the first time since my surgery and my grandmother was shocked! She could not believe how how little I am now. She just couldn't stop staring at me! Lol she was so happy for me and said that she could definitely understand why I had this done. It was a great feeling! Also, I know I'm not supposed to weigh myself until later bc I'm so incredibly swollen but apparently I'm down 7lbs since my surgery day! And I was fully clothed and still had my drain. I can't wait to see what I weigh after the swelling goes down!! :)
I'm a happy girl :)
Well ladies, I just wanted to check in! I'm doing fine. Just taking it one day at a time. So my husband surprised me and ordered the MariaE compression garment I've been wanting so bad! So I really put a lot of research in this purchase. I wanted to get the most comfortable, effective CG I could find. I first saw this brand being worn by one of our gorgeous tummy tuck sisters (Pharmsales) and who wouldn't want results like that?! So I decided on the brand and I read a ton of reviews and apparently sizing is a major issue with these. From the size chart I was a size L but everyone said to order two sizes too big and my plan has been to do that since I am only 9 days post op and I still have a very large amount of swelling. It is very adjustable so I plan to make it smaller as I go. The only problem was that I couldn't even come close to closing it! I mean it was like 8 inches too small. Not a good feeling ladies! Lol He bought it brand new from ebay so I called the seller and told her my problem. She asked for my measurements and informed me that when my swelling goes down it it will be way too big! Of course I thought she was crazy! She told me that I could keep it, return it for for cash, or exchange it. I thought about taking it with me to my next post op appointment to see if my nurses could help me try to put it on. She said to take my time and just let her know which I thought was really nice. I don't know why but I decided to try it on again. Well guess what, ladies! I got it! I feel sorry for any plus size girls who buy this damn thing bc there's no way! But the odd thing is that my legs are too small for it! Lol its so weird but oh well. I mighy return it for another style but maybe not. My husband said he would buy me another one when that one gets to be too big. There's another one I want too but money is tight for me right now since I'm off work and I'm not going to ask him to do it. So, I'm sure you guys are wondering how it's going with my new CG... I must say it's super nice. I've never experienced such a comfortable well made CG. The fabric is strong but soft, the stitching is well crafted, and the fit is impeccable. I highly recommend it but don't give up the first time you try it on and be strong! It's intense but seriously, we have all been through a major surgery or two... or 3 if you're like me! Lol We are tough and I want the best results possible. I think I'm going to wear it for a few hours every so often and work my way up. Wish me luck! :)
First time trying on pre op jeans...
Actually it's been about 5 years since these jeans fit!
New pic, ladies!
I love my waist! I used to always feel uncomfortable when I sat down in public but NOT ANYMORE!! Woohoo :)
I had a funny thought this morning...
My plastic surgeon is a true artist. I mean really, I believes that her work rivals that of any painter or sculpture! She takes such pride in her work and creates a living, breathing masterpiece. Of course, God is the one true artist and I believe that he has chose people in this world to gift with the ability to create true beauty and art. I believe that Dr. Clark is one of those who are blessed with incredible talent. And ladies, we are all beautiful, living works of art. For the first time in my life I can say that I love myself completely. There's no need to be insecure or jealous. I'm just happy and thankful that God has given me so much. We are all so blessed. Thanks for being there for me. You ladies have given me so much more than you realize :)
You're probably going to laugh but...
My husband took me out yesterday and guess what?! I went braless all day! I tried on several things and (excuse me for being conceited but) I looked awesome! I have never, ever been able to go braless but I love it! Everything fits like a glove and theres no bra line, no creases, just smooth curves! I kinda feel like one of those greek ladies in their beautiful togas! Maybe even like Cleopatra! Hahaha I know, I'm silly but I love it! Also, he bought me several gorgeous shirts and most of them are juniors size medium! I still can't wear jeans but that will come in time! Yay for pretty clothes! I don't have to look like a tent anymore!
All in all it was a pretty good day :)
I had my second week post op appointment today and It went really well. Dr Clark was so impressed with my healing and her nurses were totally shocked when I walked in. They couldn't get over it lol they kept saying, "wow, you look awesome! Congratulations!" It was nice bc I know they've seen it all. Unfortunately, I came home with my final sad little drain still in place... ugh! Lol but honestly its putting out quite a bit and I'll put up with it as long as I need to.
My mom took me to my appointment. Shes my designated driver until I get back in the saddle. Its nice bc I am super close with my mother and we had fun talking. We always do :) afterwards I went with her to her house and I got to visit my my sister who I hadn't seen since my surgery. She's awesome! She got my daughter off the bus. I have the best family. Anyway, when I walked in you could have pushed her over with a feather! She hugged me and told me she couldn't believe how little I am now and how she's just so happy for me. Then she pulled out her new clothes she bough yesterday. She got a couple cute tops from American Eagle. All SMALLS and MEDIUMS. She bet me that I could fit in them and I told her I didn't think so but guess what.... EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM FIT!! I WORE JUNIORS SIZE SMALL TODAY!! Then she gave me a bunch of clothes! She is thrilled that we will get to share clothes! But trust me, shes gorgeous and she has so much style so its me who is really excited! Money is tight right now since I'm off work for several weeks. That's ok though! Of course, I'm dying to go shopping but I can't so I'm blessed to have a wonderful sister to share with me! Its just incredible. This transformation has blown my mind lol... I am trying to get my mom to have this done too. See, she has wanted this for at least 10 years and she deserves it so much more than I do. She's the type of person who does absolutely everything for everyone. For example, she's lived in her neighborhood for 7 or 8 years and she's always been friendly with her neighbors. The woman across the street was diagnosed with brain cancer about a year after mom moved there. She's married, 36 I think, and has 2 kids like 9 and 15 years old. Mom has looked out for and taken care of this family for years. Well a few months ago this woman started to decline rapidly and mom rallied the troops. She provided dinner for this family every day either by organizing meals from the community or by cooking it herself. Her neighbor passed away on Saturday so mom is helping her family organize the donations to hospice and provide meals and whatever else they need. She's taking phone calls left and right from people asking how they can help and she's the ambassador to the family. The woman's son actually texted my mom after his mom passed away. He kind of looks up to her. She's managed to bring a whole community together to help. Then there's the neighbor beside my mom. My grandparents own that house and my mom is their property manager. A young couple lives there. They have tried desperately to get pregnant and they have had several miscarriages. My mom was one of the first people to be told about the pregnancy since the young woman didn't want anyone to know incase she lost it. My mother takes care of her too. Then there's my sister and I and yeah, I'm 25 and pretty successful but I'll be the first one to tell you that we are super needy. My mom takes care of my grandparents, my step dad and even my step mom! No that's not a typo. My step mom adores my mom. They talk several times a day. She comes to my mom for advice. Even my dad values my mom's opinion above anyone's. She's just honestly one of best people in the world. She is an amazing mom as you might have guessed. She's been a surrogate mom to almost all of my friends growing up. This woman deserves anything she wants. I know she wants this but I think she believes that if she had to be down for a few weeks that the world would stop spinning and honestly, for some people, it might. But I am determined to do whatever it takes to ensure that her dream of doing this comes true. I know I kind of got off subject but she's one of the most important people in my life and I enjoy sharing my life with you guys. Thanks for being there for me and letting me get this all out. It feels good.
New pics... 2 weeks post op!
I took these after wearing my Maria E. CG all day :)
I think my tatas are finally rounding out and getting fuller. I thought they were tiny but they are perfect for my body! I've seen such a difference since yesterday! I'll post pics soon! :)
last night I took off my cg and felt beautiful. ..
When my husband got home from work I told him that I wanted to show him something lol he couldn't stop staring. He told me that I look like a model. He was so kind and loving. It was so great to be naked and to feel powerful, beautiful. I decided to take some pictures. Right now I'm lying around, wearing sweats, no makeup, hair a mess plus I'm swollen and uncomfortable lol but I can always look at my pics and feel pretty... and before you guys start worrying about me, I plan on getting pretty tomorrow for my husband lol :) don't laugh at me too much bc of my pics! Im no model, its just nice to feel pretty.
Just feeling super anxious today :(
Ok so I'm almost 3 weeks post op and I am really doing a lot more for myself. I feel like I'm doing well but I just dont feel like I am going to be ready to go back to work in 2 weeks. I have a very, very physical job and from the moment I leave the house I won't return for 16 hours. I work 12 hour shifts but they are really 13 hours and I drive a total of 3 hours. I am so anxious today. I don't know where this is coming from. I haven't started driving yet either. I know a lot of people are at this point but my car is a 6 speed manual and I don't know if I can handle that right now. I mean, am I slow to get back into the swing of things? I can stand straight some of the day but other times I feel like I am over doing it bc I cant stand straight anymore. I just feel anxious bc I feel like the real world is pushing me to get it together and I'm not sure I'm ready for that yet. Not being able to drive really makes it hard. I dont know what to do. Maybe I should just do it anyway. Btw I still sometimes take a pain pill at night if I'm sore but usually just half of one. So thats not an issue. Well thanks for listening.
I'm taking a vacation from being super stressed! lol
Well, my mother in law, who was an RN in my PS's office until she recently went back to school, came over the other day and asked about my drain, which I still have! I told her its still putting out 30 to 40 ml a day and she asked what ive been doing all day. I guess I've been doing way too much. Well I didn't listen and now I feel horrible so I'm going to rest for the next few days. Hopefully I feel better soon! I am in swell hell big time! Mentally I'm doing a lot better. Not nearly as stressed! :)
ok sorry for the newbies who might get freaked out...
So I got rid of my last drain the other day (Friday). I don't think it wanted to leave me! It got rather "attached" to me! It was awful! I woke up that morning and my stitch had broken my skin and let my drain come out an inch or so. Well I had been thinking about pulling it anyway and its a high risk of infection since it had slid out. So I decided, since I was alone, to pull it myself. Hell, I'm an ICU nurse! Surely I could handle one little drain! So I pulled and it caught but with a gentle, steady pressure I broke it free and then it stuck again! Suddenly I felt hot, sweaty and extremely nauseous! So I decided to take a hot shower and relax. Then after my shower I tried again! Same thing, ladies! It was BAD but I knew I was just being whiny! I called my mother in law and told her what was going on. Turns out she is still working at my PS' office prn and she offered to come check it out after work that afternoon. So she looked at it and agreed it looked good but needed to come out. She texted my ps to make sure that it was ok with her and she got the green light. She had me lie down and she told me to relax but to let her know if I needed a break. She pulled and I was immediately in severe pain. It wasnt coming out! She looked surprised but tried again. I swear I was breathing like I was in labor! I looked down and she was pulling it with everything she had! NOTHING! At this point we were both stressed. She then tried rotating the drain since thats a trick they use sometimes on difficult removals. But she admitted that this had never happened to them before! She called dr Clark and told her that it seemed to be stuck. It felt like it was tearing my muscle right below my ribs. It was awful! I was wondering if my ps would have to surgically remove it! So Dr Clark told us that she would have to pull firmly then basically jerk it suddenly! I was so nervous! But she just pulled carefully then became more and more firm then she jerked it suddenly and it broke free with a loud POP!! I could have died! But it did feel better! Lol We had to examine the end to be sure it didn't break and I took it in to my ps today to be sure it was ok. I am so swollen bc I can only wear my CG that was given to me by my ps and its not tight enough anymore but I'm still very sore from the drain being removed so I can't stand my tight CGs. At least its out! Oh and on a positive note, my ps gave me an extra week off so I can recuperate more before work.
Everything is going well!
So I have been driving and it honestly does make me sore lol that car is a beast! Haha Anyway, I have some new pics for you guys! Im happy and doing well. Starting to feel more like myself but I know work is going to kick my ass! Lol I've been taking a bunch of pics. Some I look great and some I'm lost in swell hell but I think its important to show all aspects! Also my maria E CG that was 8 or 9 inches from touching when I first got it is really starting to work its magic! I went from it not fitting at all to being on the tightest setting for the past 4 days for 16 hrs a day! All I can say is WOW!! I'm going to order a new one! I have a xxl which is way smaller than that lol the size chart which I feel ok following now (sort of) says im a medium to large so I think ill order the large. If you get one, go two sizes up from your normal size. I was a large but it wasn't going to happen lol... I think I'll sell this one. It's been marvelous! I cant say enough! So, as for my incisions, they are crazy! My tt scar is nearly impossible to see! Honestly its faded to a tiny sliver. Its the most remarkable thing! My breast scars are looking great but not as far along as my tt. My bb is still healing actually. I couldn't wear my Maria E for about a week bc of the drain removal. I was terribly sore for several days and I couldn't stand to wear it. I swelled so badly for those few days and my bb opened a tiny bit but now its healing nicely. I definitely over did it today so I'm resting the next few days. My daughter has bronchitis so we are going to stay in and snuggle! Happy healing, ladies!
Well ladies, I turn 26 Monday...
It's always kind of hard to turn another year older but I look better than I ever have and I feel so good! I am proud of myself. I worked hard to get to where I am and I realize that I couldn't look this way without help but I understand now that even with all the help in the world, I couldnt have reached my goals without hard work. Im so blessed to have the love and support of my husband too. You know, he did this for me. He knew how important this was to me and he paid for it for me. I know he could have his dream car or whatever he wants. Eight grand is a good down payment. But he chose to make my dream come true. This year during my birthday I want to remember all of the ways I'm blessed. I'm a happy girl! My hubby is taking me out for my birthday Saturday and I'm super excited! HERE'S TO TURNING ANOTHER YEAR OLDER BUT LOOKING AND FEELING YEARS YOUNGER! CHEERS!! :)
a few new pics :)
Finally starting to feel good! :)
I'm back!! :)
Hey guys, sorry it's been awhile since I've updated. Life can be crazy! I've been doing really well and I'm so happy with life right now! I quit my job in the ICU! I had been there for a year and a half, it was my first job right out of nursing school! I loved it but it was time to move on. Driving a total of 3 hours per shift was crazy and working in the ICU is stressful on your body and mind. I learned so much and I'm so blessed to have that experience but I'm on to my next adventure! And that brings me to my next big news... I just got hired on at the most respected and trusted pediatrician's office in our area. Its only about 5 min from my house and day shift! Im so thrilled to have this opportunity and its going to be great to be there for my daughter, husband, and my furry children lol.... Physically I'm doing really well. I'm 67 days post op and I am gaining more and more flexibility. I'd say I'm at 98% so far when it comes to being able to move, probably 90% when it comes to feeling good and probably about 60% when it comes to swelling bc I stay in swell hell lol... I guess the surgery was really hard on my body bc I ended up having my period for 3 1/2 weeks. it was horrible! It was realky heavy the last 10 days or so and I'm pretty sure I was very anemic. I finally stopped a few days ago and I'm getting my energy back. I became very swollen and bloated over that time. I usually keep my CG on but I have gone a day here and there without it. I swell pretty bad but I am not as uncomfortable without it. I'm still going down and I know I have a LONG way to go but I'm so happy! My husband absolutely cannot keep his hands off me! I love it! We used to have sex maybe once a week and now its almost every day sometimes more than once!! Lol its an amazing feeling! I know I look good and I am using it to my advantage! Honestly he spoils me like you wouldn't believe but I love him and take really good care of him ;) for those of you that are only a few weeks out and feeling discouraged, just stay positive! It's going to get so much better and just think, its going to get way better than it is now for me! We are all in different stages of healing but we are all getting better! If you're considering this procedure, my advice is to figure out if its right for you. If you think it is then do it! I would do it again tomorrow! Its so hard and painful but all that is temporary compared to what it does for you in the long run! I walk into the room and there's not one woman that I find intimidating because shes very beautiful. I dont worry for a second about the groupies at my husband's work! Those skanks dont have a thing on me! Lol I'm being full of myself, I know but I'm happy! I finally look in the mirror and see the real me! There's nothing wrong with that! :)
here's some side by sides to show the difference between 1 month and 2 months. ...
Or even the difference between a good day and a bad day lol... these were both good days a month apart but the 1 month pics are taken after continuous CG wear and the 2 month pics were taken yesterday after about 18 hrs of no CG and running errands. So I'm still super swollen even when I have a good day but I think its getting better :)
Just a quick 4 and a half month pic update...
16 Feb 2014
4 months post
Hey guys! Hope everyone is doing well. I am absolutely thrilled with my tummy tuck and breast reduction results! I don't really have any complaints. I do plan on having a little light touch up around my birthday which will be around my 13 month mark but who knows if I'll even need it by then. I want a little lipo ariund my ribs/ bra line, on my abdomen, and maybe a bit more on my mons which continues to be super swollen. I also have to have "dog ears" removed from the edges of my breasts but they are becoming less and less noticeable. I love everything so far. I know it probably sounds silly bc I want some touch up but honestly, I'm completely happy with it. I feel beautiful now and I am way more confident. I still experience swell hell and my mons pubis is still pretty bad. Its not noticeable in clothes and my husband thinks I look amazing but I'll be glad to see the swelling go! Lol
So, life is pretty good right now but I have been really sick for probably the last month or so. In the fall of 2012 I got really sick with what seemed like meningitis. They couldn't figure out what it was but I was so sick and my liver enzymes were high. I itched really bad and my urine was tea colored. Something seemed to be attacking my liver. Eventually I got better but they tested me for everything they could think of from viruses to autoimmune diseases but couldn't find anything. They tested my liver enzymes until they started going down and my symptoms resolved. Well about a month ago I got sick again and tested positive for flu A. A few days later I started itching horribly and my urine turned dark. Again my liver enzymes were elevated. Actually they still are and they just keep going up. They are in the 300s and 500s. I've been through every blood test that my 2 specialists can think of and just had a liver biopsy the other day which was horribly painful. I waa not prepared for that. Not sure what kind of news I'm going to get this week but prayers are definitely appreciated. Im so blessed to have so much help and so many people who are there for me and love me so much. I will definitely update when I know something but I live really clean and have tested negative for everything so far so it could be that its actually my liver at this point. I'm not sure how to feel about it at this point but I'm ok with it right now. Im just ready to know something. It feels good to get it off my chest. I hate talking to my loved ones about it bc they worry so much and I kind of feel guilty about putting them through that. Plus I have been off work for 2 weeks. I just cant do it right now and it puts it all on my husband. He's been so worried about me and it makes me feel bad that he's going through that. I know it's crazy to feel guilty but I do. My mom actually told me that should I ever need a liver transplant, she would gladly offer me part of hers if she were a match, which she hopes she is. I assured her that there's no reason to worry about that but it was really sweet. I know that it's probably not anything really bad but I also know that with everything going on, its definitely possible that I will have to deal with this for a while longer. I know God will provide for my family and myself and I'm strong and will be okay but its so good to write about how I'm feeling. I really am ok. I can do this no matter what I'm facing and going through this actually makes me realize how incredibly blessed I am. Thanks so much for listening, ladies. You guys are the best and I've missed talking to you all :)
New pics and update!
18 Feb 2014
4 months post
Hey ladies, found out some stuff today so I thought I'd update and I'm really swollen but I took a few pics. I saw both of my specialists today. They said that the biopsy looks like autoimmune hepatitis. Its pretty serious and something I'll have to deal with forever but its definitely not worst case scenario amd can be controlled. I have to be seen by a liver transplant and disease specialist at the University of Cincinnati to comfirm this diagnosis and to manage my care going forward. I also tested positive for porphyria which is pretty rare but I have to have more tests to confirm that so it may not be right. It's kind of a strange diagnosis. But we'll know more. We cant start immunosuppressive therapy without seeing the specialist at university of Cincinnati so I might not see a lot of improvement until then. He is going to manage my care until I can get into U of C. I am that much closer to getting the treatment I need but I have to get in to that specialist first. I hope its soon. I should know in a few days.
feeling better and loving life
23 Jun 2014
8 months post
Well, its a long story but I am doing much better. There was never a conclusive diagnosis but after a few months my liver enzymes returned to normal and they are monitoring me closely. It's scary not really having an answer as to why I got so sick and not knowing if it will happen again but all I can do is live my life to the fullest and trust in God.
Life is pretty good right now. I'm enjoying my first summer in my new body! Its been amazing! My husband is loving it but way more protective than he used to be! Lol
I hope everyone is doing well and loving life! I'd love to hear from you all and for those looking into having these procedures, ask me anything! I am SO happy with my results! :)
Update part 1: my insight into my weight loss journey
Ok so when I started this journey I was almost 230 lbs. Now I am staring my goal weight in the eye lol.... well about goal weights. It's important to understand that at 230, 145 seemed impossible but I always remembered that was the weight I was before I had my daughter and I looked really good. However, at the time I thought 125 to 135 would be perfection (for me lol).... but as I said 145 was not a good starting point. First it was 200, then 185, 175... on the day of my first surgery I was 168 which was a huge accomplishment for me. I am active but don't work out. I have lost all of my weight through clean eating. My post surgery goal was 160 then recently I broke through the 150 mark and found myself at my teenage weight of 145. I have been losing since 2011. But for the most part it's very slow. However I've kept every single pound off. I'm very happy with my body and my self. I no longer use food as a coping mechanism. That "big girl" that I used to be is gone but I don't hate her. It took me a long time to look at those pictures and not feel disgusted. But now I realize just how brave and strong that girl was and that she made me who I am today. One of the biggest pieces to being happy once you've lost the weight is learning to love yourself now and before the weight loss. Your problems won't all magically disappear and life is still hard but you'll know that you've done something special and that you have a body that you belong in.
Update part 2: touch ups
It was a long journey but I have been absolutely thrilled with my results! However there were a couple very small things that I felt like I at least wanted to address with my ps. So being that she's absolutely amazing I felt very prepared for possibly doing a bit of touch up. She doesn't do lipo on any of the abdomen during a tummy tuck to prevent decreased blood flow to the area which can cause necrosis. Also I was left with a poofy area near the end of both breast incisions on the sides of my breasts. Third there is a little tattoo that she had to cut right through to do the tt so she was going to remove the remaining bit of that. Not that it was really necessary but I wanted a bit of lipo on my inner thighs and my bra line. So on April 7, 2015 I went back under the knife for 2 hours to fix these few small details.
My largest (2010-2011) 230lb
?Wore mostly PLUS...tops xl-xxl, jeans 18, bra 38ddd (although I'm sure I was in denial lol)
Pre main surgery (10/01/13) 168
Pre secondary surgery (04/07/2015) 155
Today (06/23/2015) 145
?shirt (jr) small, jeans 7to9, dress 6-8
Bra 32ddd (seems big but it's smaller than a 34d . Still a great size for my frame)
Ok, the FUN part!! PICS!!!!!!!
There are pics from all during 2015 including post op from my touch up in April '15. I swelled so bad that I looked worse after than before - talk about a trip!! Now though, it's so worth it!!!! :)