Fall 2013 This is kind of where my journey starts...
This is kind of where my journey starts OFFICIALLY. It’s the first time I could think of when I verbally said out loud to my mother “I want a boob job” and actually meant it, no joking. Yeah, I’ve definitely thought about it in the past, but it was a fantasy, a figment of my imagination to wonder what it would be like to have bigger boobs. Growing up, I saw all of the girls around me getting bigger and bigger and I thought to myself, “Maybe I’m just a late bloomer.” Well, the truth of it is, I never really physically bloomed in THAT way. I guess you could say it was my genes that caused this, as my mom had the same body type as me at the same age. My parents did a great job raising me to be proud of who I am, inside and out, and boosting my self esteem. I ‘ve always just simply joked at the fact that I had “the chest of an eleven year old boy”…but for real. While I’ve never been depressed or super hung up on it, the fact that I’m not as blessed in that department as other women is always on my mind. I often find myself comparing my body type to others and most of the time feeling unproportional to my muscular thighs and voluptuous booty.
It kind of started as a joke with my mom. I’m twenty years old and in college. I started my first semester in my program as a junior and surprisingly began outshining what I thought I could do by receiving multiple As on tests and quizzes. I would ask my mom “How many As do I have to get to get a boob job?” And when the next A came along I would jokingly say “Add another A to the boob fund!!!” The fact of the matter is, while I was somewhat joking around, there was a part of me that was serious. Let’s get it straight that, while I’m funding my own enhancements and I am an independent woman who doesn’t need the approval of others to make my own decisions. However, I do value my mother’s and father’s acceptance and opinion of the situation because, let’s face it, it is a BIG deal and I do still live under THEIR roof. Anyway, this continued all semester until I received a 4.0 – way higher than I expected for myself. These are the definite points where I decided I wasn’t really joking anymore.
From my previous post, these types of comments to my mom continued into spring semester of my junior year, where I continued to improve and stay on top of my grades. I was talking to a friend in my classes who was getting breast reductions and we got pretty in depth with our conversation. It was this day that I REALLY thought about a decision to get a breast augmentation (I learned the medical term recently after a lot of research). I was talking to my mom and for the first time on the subject I got 100% completely real with her. No jokes. No laughing about it. I told her that I was really considering the enhancement and what she and my dad thought about it. I disclosed the honest truth that, when I go out at night, I have to choose between looking proportional, being happy, and boosting my confidence, or not looking proportional. Along with looking proportional came the inevitable embarrassment of going home with a guy (one I had been talking to for a while), him going to take off my “bulletproof bras” (bombshells and similar), and seeing there’s actually nothing but a small handful there…Needless to say, I had never verbally spoken these truthful words before. I was surprised when my mom responded that she would support my decision. She told me that I am beautiful just the way I am and I have a personality to match that, but she understands what I am going through. I also had to do all of the research and calling offices by myself, as an adult.
Honestly, this made me a little nervous because I did not want any nurses or surgeons offices to judge me when I disclosed that I wanted a breast augmentation. First and foremost, I wanted to know what I was getting myself into financially because, honestly, I had no idea where prices could lay. I went the route of looking up offices around New Jersey and Philadelphia because those are close to home. For a lot of the offices, still being a little nervous, I used the contact us link on their websites. I sent a message similar to:
I am considering breast augmentation surgery and was wondering if you would be able to provide me with an approximate total cost for the procedure? I do know that the cost can vary from patient to patient, I just want to be informed of an estimate so I know what to expect going into the process and decide where to go from there!
When I got some answers from a few offices, I mustered up the courage to call a few offices and speak to their representatives or nurses. To my surprise, all of them sounded very nice, courteous, helpful, and cheerful over the phone, eliminating all of my thoughts about them potentially judging me. I learned that around my area, the surgery total costs anywhere from $6,000 to $10,000 and up. This surprised me as well because I didn’t know what to expect at all. I did understand that picking the procedure and doctor based on price wasn’t the way to go about this, so I did research a bunch of the surgeons, their awards, patient reviews, certifications, etc. I looked at before and after pictures to explore the results they gave their patients and discussed every step of the way with my mom to keep her informed of what I was finding out.
While I was doing this, I was also doing a lot of research about the surgery, the procedure, recovery, types of implants, types of incisions, ANYTHING and EVERYTHING I could think of. I discovered I could only consider saline implants because silicone is only FDA approved for women 22 and up. I also discovered that there were different types of shells (textured versus smooth), projections/profiles, and incisions (inframammary: under breast crease, axillary: through the armpit, and periareolar: around the nipple). Through my research, I found a lot of questions I still had that I 100% wanted answered by a doctor and not just blogs, even if they all agreed. I decided to make a consultation visit with Dr. Evan Sorokin in Cherry Hill, NJ. His office seemed up to date and state-of-the-art. His staff seemed very friendly and accommodating. He is certified and has won multiple “Top Doc” awards for different areas. His before and after results seemed very promising. Due to all of this, I went for it and scheduled my consultation appointment for the second week in May, just after I got home from college for the summer.
I forgot to mention that I do have a few friends that have had breast augmentations. If you get the chance to talk to someone who is open about their procedure, DO IT! My friends were blatantly honest about everything. They helped me figure out how to choose a doctor, gave me their opinions on different implant types, and explained their recovery process. It could take a few days to not be in pain, or it could take a couple weeks according to one of my friend’s experiences. Despite the pain, tough day-to-day experience, and being dependent on her boyfriend for about two weeks, she told me she would do it again a million times. She is so happy about her decision and even though she was in the same emotional state as me about the situation (not depressed or socially anxious), she told me it just gave her the boost of confidence she needed to be happier with her body, which is exactly what I want.
At this point, I’m not too excited, nervous, or anxious about my upcoming appointment since it is still a month away. I keep telling my mom things I’m excited about having bigger boobs: wearing normal, not padded sports bras, not having to buy expensive bombshell bras, having something bounce when I’m running at the gym, being able to look good in bathing suits at the beach, being able to buy lingerie and actually fit in it correctly. Above all else, I am excited about the confidence I will gain in myself. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not socially awkward, and I have friends…I just feel like I’ll be more comfortable approaching attractive men and others because I’m not constantly worried about fixing anything or them judging my lack of a rack, for lack of better terms at the moment. This appointment will be here before you know it.
May 13, 2014
My appointment day is finally here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn’t want to be too obnoxious with the exclamation points, but that doesn’t even begin to describe my excitement! I have an open mind, going into this appointment. I know that there is a chance that I may decide to wait another year to get silicone implants, or I may not be able to fit time into my busy summer schedule to go through with this due to vacations and trips. I will just have to wait and see what happens………I was in my consultation for about an hour. Dr. Sorokin was exactly how I imagined him: Helpful, understanding, offered his opinions, gave me and my mom facts, and answered ALL of our questions. My mom seemed impressed with the amount I knew about the procedure because I did pretty extensive research and was asking about things she didn’t even know existed. One of my first questions, and I know this will apply to a lot of women these days, WHAT ABOUT MY DERMAL PIERCINGS?! This is a huge issue for me because ladies with dermals know that they can’t simply be taken out. For surgery, though, all jewelry must be removed. Good news, THEY DON’T AFFECT ANYTHING! Dr. Sorokin explained that surgeons use mats that typically use electricity to ground your body to the operating table, which could burn areas having metal in them. He invested in a high end, state-of-the-art mat that grounds your body below the waist, so it is not a problem. This made me super happy and helped me understand that this doctor knew what he was doing, understood different circumstances, and wants to help his patients as much as he possibly can.
When I arrived I filled out an expectation sheet of what I wanted to achieve with this surgery. I circled that I wanted to be a B cup (from a 34A). I appreciated his opinion that I should try sizers on for a C cup in order to accommodate my taller physique and achieve the proportional look I was going for. He explained that so many women come back and say that they regret not going bigger and that going from an A cup thus far to a C cup sounded so drastic but it could be a perfect fit. Again, I appreciated this suggestion, as he was trying to help me out. Ultimately, I decided I liked the look of the 400cc sizer for my right breast and probably around 375cc for my left breast due to its slightly larger size.
After talking to Dr. Sorokin and his nurses, my mom and I met an office coordinator who went over pricing, financing, extra options, and how everything worked the day of surgery. They were not pushy about scheduling that day at all, which I liked. The ladies explained everything in depth for us to comprehend. When we asked about dates, I expected them to tell me I would have to wait a few months. They surprised me when they told me they were scheduling about 3 weeks to a month out from that week! My mom and I talked about it and I told her that I wanted to go through with it and schedule my surgery. June 4th sounded like such a quick time frame (3 weeks), but it was absolutely the perfect date. I did not feel like I was rushing or anything, even though I have to start a vitamin regimen next Wednesday (I opted to purchase it for easier healing) and stop taking my birth control at the same time. This was the perfect date because I am going to Virginia Beach a couple weeks after that to visit my best friend, and vacation the end of July to the Bahamas, which didn’t allow too much time for visits after, since I start my senior year of classes three weeks after that. The date is set and I am BEYOND excited. They helped us sign up for care credit right then and there, which my mom liked because she wanted to make sure it was absolutely correct.
What I didn’t know is that I cannot drink alcohol, take birth control, or consume a list of aspirin related medicines, or fruits as they contribute to more bruising, blood clotting, or thinning issues. This is important to know beforehand.
I went with another nurse right after meeting with the office coordinator to take my blood pressure (I was a little excited, so I think it was a little high), a blood sample, and urine sample. At this office, it is all valid for 30 days to apply to a surgery. Again, this nurse was very personable and friendly, like all the other staff I had met. They all seemed genuinely excited for me in my decision to have breast augmentation surgery! When I was leaving, the nurse reminded me to e-mail them pictures of the look I desire, which many offices do. Next Wednesday, I have to follow the list of things not to eat and start my vitamins. Until then…
2 days until my BA
I've been talking to a lot of coworkers about my upcoming BA and, God, I'll miss all of them while I'm off. They are all so super supportive and happy for my independent decision! Other people, however, I haven't told. I haven't told some people because, quite frankly, I don't want or need their opinion. I don't want to listen to what they have to say about MY body (regardless of if it is positive). This is MY decision to make myself feel more comfortable and confident in my own skin. I don't need to hear what others think and I don't want to listen to it. Period. I thank God every day because even though my family thinks I am beautiful just the way I am, they are supportive of my decisions......aaaaandd my mom gets it. She had the same body type when she was my age. BA is just definitely more common nowadays.
1 day postop
My mom said Dr. Sorokin came out around 10:35 to tell them that I was out of surgery and everything went well. She said Evy, another nurse, came out about an hour and a half later to tell them that I was waking up and looking around me (stage 1 recovery). I have light bandages and steri-strips on the incision, and a surgical bra. It's a lot cuter than the ugly white ones everyone has a vision of. They gave me an extra one, because I am supposed to wear these the next 6 weeks. I go back tomorrow for my first post-op visit and again next week sometime for another post-op visit, and to be taught how to massage my new breasts. One of the nurses, Jenn, who was with me all day, basically, called this morning around 11 to check up on how I was doing. Everyone at the office is so awesome. So accommodating, friendly, comforting, and genuinely excited for me to have surgery!! I seriously don't think I could have picked a better doctor/staff.
Jenn told me they would give me enough medicine in my system to last the ride home yesterday. I should eat something with substance, like a muffin or bagel, and then could take a dose of vicodin when I got home. Yesterday was basically a mash of naps and some TV. I ate a little bit, but my appetite wasn't fully back. I went to bed around 10:30pm and woke up at 2am needing some medicine. I went back to sleep until around 8am and have been taking naps and watching movies all day pretty much. The pain/soreness is better than it was all day yesterday, but I am still taking vicodin and motrin, both prescribed by the doctor. For now, I have to do arm lifting exercises, basically lifting my arms as high as I can over my head to stretch out my tight muscles. So far, not too intolerable, just uncomfortable and sore.
5 days post-op
Last Friday, I had my first follow-up visit with Dr. Sorokin. I can't stress how much I love the staff there. I walked in and, immediately, the girls at the desk knew my name and told me it would just be a little bit until my appointment. It makes me so ecstatic that they remember me and were genuinely excited for my procedure and happy for my results. Not every office can be like this. During my appointment, Evy, a nurse, took off the light bandaging (kind of like gauze taped to my skin) and trimmed the tails of the stitches. She cleaned up the skin a bit and put more steri-strips on the incisions. Nothing hurt (I was definitely nervous) and Dr. Sorokin had come in to see the progress. He said he was very happy with how everything came out and everything would only get better from here.
A couple concerns I had during my follow-up:
I get sharp pains in the sides of my breasts when I twist or put a shirt/jacket on behind my back ----- Dr. Sorokin assured me this is normal and may subside soon or at least should within 5-6 weeks. He said it usually occurs on both sides, but wasn't sure why one side hurt more than the other (my left side). UPDATE: I'm still getting the sharp pains. They are now on both sides, but not just randomly. It's mostly when I twist to put a shirt on or take it off or twist my body to wipe after going to the bathroom.
My nipples are pretty much numb ----- This is normal. My left nipple is completely numb, whereas the right one has a little feeling. Dr. Sorokin said, since my nipples are still swollen, they don't have feeling (neither do the underside of my breasts due to stretching the skin). This will subside within 5-6 weeks. He did tell me that "they will come back with a vengeance" and be super sensitive in about 5-6 weeks. I appreciate him telling me that, so I don't freak out when that happens. UPDATE: Still numb.
I am also still doing my arm raises frequently to loosen the pectoral muscles. I have showered a couple times and it's very weird because I don't want to make any movements to cause the sharp pains. I think I'm just being too cautious. These pains honestly are not crippling, just surprising and frustrating. I had an episode the other day taking off a slightly tighter shirt that caused a longer lasting sharp pain. I started crying more because it scared me than it hurt. My poor mom...she was helping me.
MAKE SURE YOU HAVE SOMEONE TO HELP YOU OUT FOR A COUPLE DAYS POST-OP!!!!!!! I cannot stress this enough. I appreciate my mom being able to help me out sooooooooooo much because she made everything easier. She also gave me all my medicines because I couldn't use my strength to push down on the medication caps or push myself up (lots of ab exercise LOL and "scooching" my butt back toward my elevated pillows). I am gaining some of that strength back, still sleeping with elevated pillows, and missing sleeping on my side very much...its just a little uncomfortable still. I have another post-op visit this Friday! Have all week off from work...I think today or tomorrow would have been a good day to go back (pain-wise) if I didn't have to carry heavy trays of food all day. Plus, I'm going to visit my best friend next week, so why not take an extra week off :) I tried driving today...pretty successful! Not uncomfortable, just weird getting used to slight side boob that I've never had! Until my next appointment...
Dr. Sorokin and his staff were very friendly and accommodating from the time I called the office, to walking in for the first time, until the time I walked out of my consultation visit. I felt very at home and welcomed at the office. They answered all of my questions and were very professional, knowledgeable, and experienced. Following surgery, I feel I couldn't have chosen a better doctor and staff. They were genuinely excited for me from start to finish! Super accommodating and friendly.