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I am a female suffering from persistent acne for...

I am a female suffering from persistent acne for 17 years. I am now 36 years old. It is moderate and at rare times mild but it is chronic. Even if a week or 2 pass without any new pimples, I would be still struggling to cover the red post acne marks. By the time these fade or about to fade, I will get new ones and restart the battle. It is most of the time closed pores which are clogged then it gets inflamed. Mainly affects my face and occasionally back or chest.

I am never able to be without makeup even at home. Throughout the 17 yrs, I never allowed anyone to see my real skin. I have my own washroom which is my operation theatre! Of course I use medicated concealer that is particularly formulated to treat acne (with Salicylic acid).

I tried all home remedies and diet adjustments (gluten free, dairy free, soya free, egg free, low glycemic foods, Paleo diet, herbals as spearmint and green tea. .etc). I have seen around 7 dermatologists and tried different tropical treatments, salicylic acid, benzyl peroxide, blue laser sessions, sulfur, facial injections, chemical Peels and antibiotics. Nothing worked and I got exhausted. I spent a fortune as well!

I used even to be ashamed to show my real skin to dermatologists and usually uncover just part of my skin to show it then reapply my mask. All my hormone and blood tests used to be fine and my weight, hygiene and diet are ideal and all my family members have flawless skin; so I never discovered the real cause of my life problem.

I am deprived of going to the beach, avoid sun as it reveals the true texture of my skin, avoid coming near anyone, avoid dentists and saloons, avoid direct eye contact, avoid carbohydrates, caffeine, diary products and sugar, avoid any social gathering or occasion as I never know how my face will look like and how effective will be my coverage. I never enjoyed high school or university and have always been isolating myself though I really wish to socialize!

It has affected my work and relationships greatly. I refused to have a wedding party and was resisting marriage as I knew I will also need to hide my face while sleeping. I am also refusing pregnancy as it means I won’t be able to use all my tropical creams and may worsen my case. At many times I kept praying God in tears to end my life if I am destined to not have a face like others.

By time I lost the ability to smile, I do not even remember the last time I did! Finally I reached my 8th dermatologist who allows the patient in a small room connected to a washroom to remove makeup and show her the real skin then reapply it before going out to other patients!

She prescribed Accutane 40 mg (2 tablets 20 mg a day) for 6 months. I researched much and got to know about its side effects but I see that I have tried everything else for enough amounts of time and already helpless. I am so terrified of the initial breakout; as accompanied by dry skin it will be difficult to hide my face. I decided to start it during my vacation and lock myself up at home in hope that by the 3rd month my face will be again manageable to hide with makeup!

I will start it in a couple of months and will write weekly updates and upload photos.