Puffiness (edema) and red discoloration (erythema), to a variable degree, are part of the body’s healing response to surgery. It may take up to six months for the puffiness to resolve completely. However, most of the swelling will be gone after the first month. In the first two weeks after surgery, keeping your head elevated and using cold compresses will aid in resolving the swelling as soon as possible. Avoiding any situation which elevates your blood pressure and pulse (like exercising) will also help.
The redness you are experience is a result of the increase in circulation the your body uses to accomplish the healing of the eyelids after your surgery. This will take up to one year to resolve completely in the scars.
The redness you see in the eyelid itself will usually go away within the first month. Staying out of the sun or using an SPF 45 sunscreen will help your body resolve this temporary coloration. Cover makeup can also mask this issue until the body resolves it naturally. Basically, your surgeon is correct. I encourage you to keep meeting and discussing your concerns with him until the healing process is complete to your satisfaction.