Should I Remove Implants? Is There a Good Affordable Solution and Some Way to Feel Ok About my Body After?
- 9 months ago
I need some feedback please. And I am using this as a sounding board too. I hope someone will listen and offer some good advice. I know I ramble on a bit here. But maybe someone can relate. First let me say that I am sad that our culture makes us think we need to do this, put plastic in our bodies to try to try to look like some "ideal woman". I have looked through virtually every photo on this sight and have seen such variety in women's breasts and wonder where we came up with the idea we all have to have big round breasts? At such great cost! Physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, mentally etc. I have seen before pictures of women who have very attractive natural breasts that put giant implants in, why? And women who maybe have non ideal looking breasts that have surgery that just makes them look "different" and some that look radically better according to our modern "ideal". I've seen women who have had implants taken out and some look better, some worse. Many scars. I'm sad that I wasn't happy with who I was. And afraid to be who I am without them. I'm sad that men treat us different with and without them. So I'm wondering if I should have them removed now, or just wait till they break or??? I'm pretty sure the answer is yes, at least eventually, but I was so very flat before! I didn't even feel they were the cute kind of little breasts. Nearly ironing board flat and one was even smaller than the other. I don't really want to have new implants because of finances and potential problems again. Good chance of hardening again or who knows what else, and it would be a very frivolous expense that I can't really justify . I have had them in for almost 23 years. Silicone surrounded by water. I don't know much more than that about them. I think under the muscle. One has pretty bad hardening, looks much bigger than the other probably because of this, and they just look fake for a woman as small and at my age. I'm afraid I will be really depressed to have such small breasts again. It would be a pretty radical difference. My mammo Dr says they will eventually break and I should have them out. Should I wait till then? They also have that feeling of being something "stuck on" me at this point. The hardest one is a little painful, tightness under my armpit. I have shoulder pain and wonder if I would feel more "free"? On the other hand, my friends say I look good in clothes. I never felt that way back when I didn't have them. Sometimes I feel silly with these big bulbous things sticking out of my tops though. But of course the men seem to like it, even if they are the first to notice they are fake. At my age I finally realize I'm not in need of that kind of attention. But I do want to feel attractive still. And on the other hand, my boyfriend pretty much completely ignores them, probably because they are hard and not very touchable. We have been together for 6 years and he is not the kind that is easy to talk about this stuff. We have never talked about it! But if I do this I will have to. So be it. Maybe he would prefer my soft little tiny breasts? My ex-husband never paid my little soft ones any mind either. But as soon as I had implants in I had men falling all over themselves. I felt more confident and beautiful at times. What a mind fuck! And now a heart & soul fuck! I have an appointment for a consultation with my same doctor from 23 years ago in a couple weeks. I met with him a couple years ago for a consult. I also met with 2 other doctors. No one gave me an answer I felt good about so at the time I dropped it. They all said they could take them out and I'd probably be very flat and maybe saggy. All told me they would be happy to put new ones in for $4000 - $11,000. But a good chance of hardening again. I don't think I could see myself justifying the money, time, and all that goes with doing that again. Even a little shame. I wonder if by chance since I was in my 20's at the time and now in my 50's maybe, just maybe there is more of my own breast there now? Is there some magic thing my doctor can do very inexpensively, safely and all that will make my breasts pretty enough, make me look good in clothes, make me not feel like a little boy, make me attractive to my man and to myself, if not big and round like supposedly we are supposed to be? I am amazed that there isn't a category of surgeons who have seen the need to help those of us in this predicament and who have taken on specializing in helping bridge the gap between cosmetic surgical solutions and natural healthy solutions to make us feel like beautiful women with beautiful natural breasts. I know that's a tall order. But it would be wonderful. In my search I hoped that someone, maybe a woman PS would be different. It just felt like they were in the business of pumping out more plastic women with plastic breasts. Even my general doctor who is a woman and my mammo doctor who is a woman kind of avoid the subject. Maybe they don't want to offer advice? I don't mean to be critical, I believe they all feel they are doing good. And for women who really need it I believe they are. Like cancer survivors maybe. I felt kind of deformed myself. I'm sure we all do. But a lot of us aren't! But I'm afraid if I get them out I will feel that way again.