I'm trying to decide whether or not to have a breast reduction.

  • Denver698
  • 3 years ago

I'm 30, weigh 155lbs, am 5'6" and have had very large breasts my whole life (starting in 5th grade). I now wear a 38J. I have huge divets in my shoulders and have always had back/neck/shoulder pain. I am a textbook case for a reduction and my mom, who is also very well endowed, has always told me that I should get a reduction, that she regrets never doing it. Here is my major concern: my breasts have become such a huge part of who I am. It took me so long to be comfortable with my body and the stares I ALWAYS get that I'm scared to change it. They are a big part of me. I'm really nervous that I will no longer be ok with myself and my self-image. I have a very small body and huge boobs and am used to stares and comments. I know it sounds ridiculous but I'm worried that if I stop getting attention my self-esteem will go down. I know it doesn't make sense for a successful, independent woman, but apparently my sense of self is really tied to my breasts. The pain or fact that I'll have scars doesn't really worry me, though I am a bartender and concerned about the loss of income. Anyway has anyone else had similar concerns? Can anyone help me out or add any info?

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Hi! I, like you, have the same consideration :) I am tiny, a 32H cup, and have honestly NEVER hated my breasts the way a lot of other women have!

In high school they were an amazingly perky 32F cup. Did they get me negative attention? Yes. In fact one football player used to follow me around and yell "slut!" at me in the halls... I didn't care though! I loved my shape. I loved the way I filled out tops. I had a boyfriend who my best friend still refers to as my "barbie boy" and treated me like a queen and I saw my banging body as one of the things that caught him.

Fast forward to my early 20's... I was still loving being petite and racked. I was on the guest list for the playboy mansion parties. I dated everyone from an actor who won Teen Vogues sexiest man of the year (oddly he was never sexy to me at all...) to a foreign billionaire who was smoother then James bond. Of course, again, I am not kidding myself into thinking the fact that I was thin and stacked didn't help me along! Did I sometimes get dirty looks from parents out with their kids, or other women, when I was wearing something "scandalous" like a normal cut t-shirt? Yes. But I didn't care because I loved my body and was confident in it!

Then a funny thing happened.... My back started to hurt. Within two years it went from a little pain sometimes to all of the pain all the time as I have taken to calling it :p At this point I am married to an amazing man, and while my breasts would likely still open doors for me, they aren't doors I have any desire to walk through anymore.

For a good year and a half after my doctor did a bunch of tests and found there was no cause for my back pain other then my breasts I tried everything. I lost an obscene amount of weight (all the way down to 108lbs.) and my breasts staid the same size... I bought the most expensive customs bras in Los Angeles and the pain didn't change... I did targeted exercises like a mad woman and the pain didn't budge...

I realized it was pain or the reduction, and I had to chose the reduction. This lead me to another realization though: I have loved my body through all its various phases.... When I have been heavier I have felt curvy and rubenesque... When I have been thin I felt like a playboy model....When my breasts began to sag a lot years ago I didn't even notice! This brought me to realize I don't love my body because of my breasts... I love my body because I am confident and treat myself lovingly in that regard. There is no reason for me to believe that that will go away if I take the girls down a few sizes!

It was also crucial for me to find a doctor who was comfortable leaving me big... We are only going down to a D, and I know if I put those puppies into a wonder bra I will still be able to look amazingly stacked. I also fully expect that there will be an adjustment, but I am confident I will come back to that body love because I always have!

You also sound like you love your body. There is no reason to think that will go away no matter what you do with your breasts! Hope that idea is helpful to you in some manner :)
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Your thought provoking points are well taken. THanks and good luck to you.It's quite amazing how people change as bodies change through the years.
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I realized after writing all of this that I could simply have said that just like plastic surgery won't fix a terrible body image, it shouldn't ruine a good one either :) Loving your body and being confident and feeling good about it is a lot more about mental state then it is about any (no matter how large, lol!) specific feature.
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It 's a very difficult descision. Once it's done it's done. I've considered this for years. I have committed myself to the gym to put this descision of and it seems to work for me. I just cannot seem to trust anyone to cutting into me . I come from a family of large breasted women. (Mom is a g cup) so this is a common topic of conversation among us. I say no for me but your motive might be different . Good luck in you descision.
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I can only tell you for myself, like all of us, I've always known I needed to have the reduction surgery at some point. For me, I haven't been ready until this year and I'm 39 (I'll probably be 40 before I'll have it since I turn 40 next spring and that is when I'm shooting to have the surgery). I wasn't ready when I was 30 either. Just take time to make the best decision for you. I'm a 38JJ and this year was the first year they have really actually caused me enough pain to interfere with my life. Everyone is different, just don't feel rushed. Good Luck!!
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My wife has the exact same frame as you do and she has 38J's also. I know she loves them also because of the attention but her back does kill her and her bra straps are causing grooves in her shoulder. She thought of surgery but I think right now she is going to see if working out can strengthen her back. The bra is another issue. Hang in there and do whatever makes you feel better.
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Hi there. I stumbled across this site/your post while searching for more information on reductions. I am strongly considering one by the end of the summer. I wear a 36DDD/F and I'm smaller than you (5'3", 130 lbs.). It's just impossible to exercise whilst keeping everything in place, even with three sports bras. The thing is, my fiance loooves them. We've been together for 5 years since high school, I'm 21. He's been supportive of my consideration but at the same time I can tell that he'll miss them. I know that I should do what's best for me, and even he said so, but ever since I brought up the idea he's been giving them extra attention all the time. Has anyone of you ladies experienced discouragement or the like from a partner? How does your partner feel about your consideration Denver, if you're in a relationship? I think if I had J cups, my hubby might just object! LOL
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Hi Denver,

Two weeks off work will be wonderful.  My doc had advised no heavy lifting for the first month but if you can modify for the first two weeks back that will help.

This recovery is not so bad.  You will have soreness and bruising but not really any horrible pain.  You may want to shake some of those martinis up for yourself after surgery..LOL   Yeah you will not want to shake anything the first month.  Mine had told me not to lift over 10 pounds or push or pull anything over my head for the first month.

However I was back in the gym one month post op and did not have any pain with exercise.  Loved it!! 

The scars are different for each person based on your skin tone etc.  You will not see the incisions that are placed under the breasts so that will be fine.  On each end of my incision under the arms is where it was purple for over a year.  With proper scar care  this will help them to fade.  Plus just time heals.  It really is a give and take situation.  My scars are very faint now but the results far out weigh those.  They are minimal and do not bother me at all.  My neck, shoulders and back feel wonderful. 

Glad I did this...


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Hi Denver,

Well breast reduction is a very emotional and personal decision.   Part of it is physical stress on your body but the bigger part is the mental portion.  You need to be completely ready for this before you jump into it.  Be totally sure before you make any final decisions. 

Personally it was the best thing I ever did for myself.  All of my physical aches and pains are gone and I also feel mentally better.  I also had large breasts since my teens and always hated them.  I knew this was what I wanted and did not look back for a minute.  My breasts were also a big part of my identity and I hated that.  I did not want to be noticed and remembered for my breasts.  And I am not saying that there is anything wrong if you do want this.  It simply was not for me. 

Personally my self esteem went up after the reduction.  I felt amazing immediately.  My breasts were even, small and perky...and minus the weight on the neck and shoulders. 

What it comes down to is being comfortable in your own skin no matter what your size or shape.  So do what makes you happy and don't worry about what others will think or say.  You will know if and when you are ready for this. 


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Thanks Kimmers, I've been reading alot of what you post and find it very helpful and informative. I have a couple other questions...I'm a pale redhead and am worried about the scars. What did you experience? I had a couple surgeries on my arm 11 years ago and it took probably 5 before it stopped being bright purple, so that is a concern for me.
Also, I'm a bartender. I've already spoken to my boss, who has been nothing but wonderful, he told me he'd work it out so I get paid vacation for 10 days then he'll let me host (no moving/lifting involved) for a few days. Do you think I'll be ok to go back to work after 2 weeks off? The thought of shaking martinis after surgery makes my head hurt. ; )
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That's a really interesting conundrum. And I congratulate you on being self aware enough to consider this before surgery. What if you went smaller, but not small? You never know, your self-esteem might even improve afterward... Good luck and please let us know what you decide to do!

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Thats always been what I assumed would happen, that my self esteem would go up. But I am scared it won't! But I've been thinking alot about it and I have just scheduled a consult, even if just to talk about it. I guess we'll see! Thanks for the help, I'll let you know what I decide.
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